I was on the ground. My head spun in a million directions. I didn't know what to do.

I was going to die. My life was in her hands.

I'm going to...

Then, it appeared.

An image popped into my head. The wind flurried enough for their clothes to rustle. The animal-shaped clouds blocked the sun. In the meadow were three boys with arms locked, skipping through the long shards of grass and the blooming flowers. Their contagious smiles removed everything negative about the world, placing it into a temporary seal.

Another image. It was something that I yearned for: the gray walls towered over everything in sight, separating two different people. On one side were idealistic humans who had everything; on the other were savages who wanted everything.

It wasn’t right. I couldn’t live there because it was unreachable.

But it didn’t matter. I had my friends with me and wanted to live with them in peace regardless of their location.

I wanted to live with them, whether in the City of Ionia or the outside world.

What did you swear to do?

What did you swear to find?

Live. I had to live.

I wouldn't be able to live in peace if I died.

I wouldn’t be able to live with my friends if I died.

What did you lose? I had nothing. I slowly gained friends, comrades, and people I could rely on. But what happened? I lost it all again. I kept gaining, only to lose.

My eyes opened, her legs closed in, and I was about to crush my skull with her heel at any second.

No. I couldn’t lose. No way I would lose! My ambitions were unbreakable. I wasn’t going to lose that by dying. This woman had no goal. She was just following the way of life she knew.

But I had a goal.

A purpose.

A reason to beat her, and a reason why I had to win! I had to protect that reason so I could one day live the life I desired!

I didn’t know how much I had in me. Even if I walked out of here with missing limbs, I wouldn't care because I had to win!

I strained myself, yelling, pushing my body up. “You’re getting in the way of that!” Go to hell, you scum. You’re blocking my path.

“My, my, looks like it’s not—!”

I charged at her with everything I had. One strike. I punched her with every ounce of strength. Two strikes. Three strikes. Four. Five. Another. Another. Another.

She was overwhelmed by my punches and unable to parry away. My fists kept going. I put my remaining strength into this one chance. I punched once more but was blown away by a quick counter.

She slammed my head against the wall. I’ll lose…

No. Not yet. She popped out in front, throwing another strike. My body was on the verge of collapsing. But I couldn’t just yet. Her strike was coming in hot. I might die if I get hit.

I miraculously dodged to the side and used her momentum against her, slamming her nose into the wall. I smashed her head against the same spot over and over. Blood squirted out in all directions.

Stolen from Royal Road, this story should be reported if encountered on Amazon.

I slammed her like a lifeless puppet, the back of her head facing my palms. Yelling out of breath, I pulled the wooden piece out of my leg and stabbed her in the side of her thigh. Her cries were muffled by my own.

I threw her against the wall, where she sat on her rear, defeated. Her nose was crooked. Blood covered her face and fists. Her previously clean bun was messy, with hair dangling everywhere. It looked like a wild animal mangled her.

“Oh, the bird in the cage, where will it go? Nowhere they say, the bird is nothing more than a foe.” Looking at the ground, defeated, she coughed a chuckle. “There’s no meaning behind those words.”

I picked up a piece from the broken wooden chair, dragging myself closer to her sullied body. Holding my stomach, I loomed over her. I raised the weapon, ready to detach her skull. Her eyes looked at me absent-mindedly. Those winter eyes ignited a blizzard years ago. I was the ignition. The cause of my selfishness led us here.

“So, this is how it ends?”

I wouldn't have heard her if it weren’t for the complete silence.

I could easily end her life. Her fate was in my hands. She looked up at me with no emotion or interest.

It's already been ten years since that day. It’s been that long since I met her slim, ginger hair and her dream. I recalled how excited she was when she offered to tag along. The child, enveloped in despair, finally caught a glimpse of sunlight. There was no care in the degree of difficulty or death’s fangs. She wanted to tag along regardless of the infinite possibilities that stood by.

All she desired was to roll in the sharp shard of grass. Drink the flowing stream water. Eat the wild berries. Count the stars. I neglected her dream, and now she tried to ignore mine. I was no different than her.

And because of that, I realized I couldn’t kill her. I dropped the imitated sword, not on her throat, but on the ground. She wanted to say something, but my decision rendered her speechless.

“I’m not that person anymore.” It wasn’t the entire truth. Yes, I did associate myself with death, but I couldn’t fathom expressing my guilt.

There was a vague smile under her lips. “That’s…That’s a hypocritical thing to say, considering what occurred the other day.”

“We all have circumstances that test our will.”

Her hand was over her chest, breathing unevenly, but she got more words out. “So…are you going to follow your delusions?”

I tucked my chin to my neck, trying to hide my smirk. “All along, I’ve been searching for something majestic. Imagine if we could all live together. No savage outsiders, no SCAR agents transfixing villagers. Wouldn’t it be nice if we shared our warmth in paradise? I pursued this ideal till I couldn’t remember when I never did. I searched for it so hard, so long, and the more I did, the more despair I found. I was shielded by stubbornness and my unwavering determination. But I realized it wasn’t my dream.”

How did I not see this? Why did it take me so long to figure it out?

Naiveness—what a sinful act.

I continued. “I abandoned my own and adopted someone else's. That’s the way I was living. I lived for someone else. I…I don’t want to do that anymore. I want my own purpose. I want to live in paradise, but more importantly, I want to…” Live with them. I wanted to say that, but my throat caught my voice, placing a temporary lock on it.

I would reach the paradise that had inhabited my mind since the cells. I didn’t need to destroy the wall or SCAR. A peaceful life in paradise with people I cherished sounded lovely.

But even if I couldn’t get past the walls, I wouldn’t mind settling down and living in the outside world.

“You’re still going to attempt to get past the walls? It sounds to me like you’re still deluded.” I grabbed a glimpse of her face. Her eyebrows narrowed with mesmerizing eye contact.

I couldn’t help but gaze at her with a grin. “Maybe you’re right. I still could be deluded. But what this outside world has done to me…it’s unforgiving. But even so, I don’t mind staying here. But if the opportunity to go into Ionia presents itself, then best believe I’ll go. For now, I’ll rest and watch the sunrise in the mountains with the people I love.”

She brought one knee to her chest, resting her arm on it. “You talk ill about the world, yet you don’t sound upset.”

With my eyes shut, I expressed all my teeth. The room didn’t feel cold anymore, lonely, or refreshing. The smile I expressed felt refreshing.

“Why would I be?”

Without this unforgiving world, I would never have met beauty. Without this unforgiving world, I would never have had the drive to search for a way through the walls. My wants wouldn’t be the same. The person who I am wouldn’t be the same. It was all thanks to this beautiful, unforgiving world.

She scoffed, collapsing on her side. “You make no sense.”

I looked inside her soul and turned around, heading for the exit. As I stepped out of the cell, her voice stopped me.

“Jill. Wouldn’t it be nice if we had normal lives?”

I didn’t respond, think, or look back. I started walking in search of Roger.