It was late. Far too late for Thrash to want to review anything else in his interface. However, Pierre was gone, Mush had retired to her cubby hole - without needing to be asked - and he was left to his own devices. A single candle remained lit on the wall beside his bed, just enough to keep the room cosy, though it was still draughty and empty.
Thrash’s mind whirred. He couldn’t remove his gaze from the eyes icon in the corner of his interface. He had checked relentlessly, and there was no glitch or error that had prematurely placed him on the leaderboards, so there was no way someone could actually be watching him. Yet, the eyes remained. Had his old crew found a way to spy on him? Or, had he done something to displease the people over at Starr Galaxy Entertainment? He shuddered, feeling as though someone were standing over his shoulder, and then pulled up his private messages with Una.
1 second ago: Thrash: Someone is watching me. Someone is also messing with my dungeons. Can you investigate?
Thrash let the message sit there for a moment, expecting a reply, but then closed it, sighing. Clearly, he was on his own. A soft buzzing noise emanated from Mush’s cubby, as if to argue with him, but Thrash ignored it. He straightened his back and sat against the wall, rubbing at his sore neck. It was becoming increasingly frustrating to be flung across the dungeon floors at every turn, his back thudding against walls and surfaces like a rag doll. Hopefully, in the future, he could find a skill or an item that could turn him into a bouncy ball, or maybe even a teddy bear.
Thrash shook his body, trying to dismiss his aches and pains. He needed a distraction. He had a total of three achievements to go through, alongside the quest from Pierre to turn in that might lead to another. He was feeling quite confident in his progress, but the concern that his dungeon was being negatively manipulated kept him from being truly happy with the results. If Mush hadn’t caught the change in the Devilish Oakenslug’s description, Thrash would’ve assumed that the fight had been a glitch, or a one off event. But somebody had edited that description, and that somebody had wanted him to fail. He felt ghastly.
Then, Thrash received a notification. That was quick for Una, he thought to himself. However, it wasn’t Una.
2 seconds ago: Pierre: Home safe. Perimeter built and extended thanks to the slime. No more mobs can get on the farm. Still needs clearing, though.
Thrash immediately knew how to distract himself. He opened up Vendor Exchange, once again being bombarded with messages. There were hundreds of ridiculously titled mails, almost all a form of spam in one way or another. He scanned through his inbox to find references to his Glade Stone, passing the time for a short while. One mail in particular caused him to snort.
Sender: Prince Oriton
Subject: MISPLACED PRINCE REQUIRES GLADE STONE
Message: Esteemed friend - I am Prince Oriton of Ritewun. I urgently require your assistance with a matter of great importance. Due to unforeseen circumstances, I find myself in desperate need of a Glade Stone to resolve some personal issues that have arisen.
Upon receiving the Glade Stone, I will generously transfer 1,000 gold pieces to your account as a token of my deep appreciation. THIS IS A LEGITIMATE OPPORTUNITY.
Time is of the essence. Please respond quickly so that we can address this matter before it escalates.
From your loyal friend, Prince Oriton.
What a load of rubbish, Thrash snorted to himself. He brought up the leaderboard, scanning for an Oriton just in case, but found nothing. That figures.
Thrash filtered through the rest of the messages, leaving only a couple to check later, and then pushed through to review what was for sale.
‘Huh,’ he murmured. ‘That’s a lot of stone.’
Positions 1 to 40 of the Vendor Exchange were all individual sellers selling stone; not just one piece, either, but thousands of pieces. Thrash had a total of 102 gold left, and the cheapest of the listings showed 100 stone for only 10 gold. He investigated further, noting that almost all the sellers were Dungeon Masters. His brow furrowed. This was an insight into his future. It was good to know.
Thrash continued with his initial objective. He opened up the filters of the exchange to try and reduce the overall amount of listings - hundreds of thousands of them. While there were more listings than could realistically be counted, there were almost as many filters. There were filters for the type of combat or the type of weapon. There were more for the material of the weapon, or for crowd control properties like knockback or stun. He could sort by rarity and value, by craftsmanship, and more importantly, by specific Adventurer needs. Here, he found a single category that would work well for Pierre: ‘For Low-Level Farmers.’
Thrash grinned, allowing a moment to filter through the results, setting a maximum price of 15 gold. He sorted from highest to lowest price, and a few names caught his eye. He read through their two-line descriptions on the main exchange interface; all, fortunately for Mush, had descriptions that were definitely influenced by her.
Rusty’s Edge
Item Rarity: Common
An excellent blade for a beginner. It might be rusty, but it’ll hack an arm off.
Rusty loved this blade, but Rusty didn’t last long. Please last longer. Mummy has needs, you know.
Thrash squirmed. ‘What kind of description is this?’
With no response, he moved on to review the next item.
Long-Handled Hoe
Item Rarity: Common
Slash and swipe with this hoe. Make your enemies bleed with a single swing.
Mummy likes long handles. Don’t call Mummy a hoe.
Thrash picked out a final weapon for comparison.
Grandpa’s Sickle
Item Rarity: Common
This curved blade is easy to swing and can harvest wheat - and your limbs!
Granny used to rave about Granpa’s Sickle and how it would tickle!
Thrash shuddered at Mush’s line, comparing the three. In essence, all were the same, but the hoe had a much longer reach. Mush had told him that a named weapon would be worth far more than an unnamed one, and considering Sheila was only just shooting for more than 15 gold, he presumed that these were also priced for profit rather than what they were actually worth. He decided to make an offer.
You have selected 'Make an Offer’.
You are choosing to make an offer on the Long-Handled Hoe.
You are offering 8 gold pieces. Confirm choice?
Thrash confirmed, and then sat back, another achievement star whizzing across his screen, the number 4 marked beside it. Thrash was about to open them up, when a sound made him jump.
Commiserations! Your offer has been confirmed.
Your offer of 8 gold pieces for Long-Handled Hoe was accepted.
8 gold pieces have been removed from your inventory; Long-Handled Hoe has been added to your inventory.
Please think of the Vendor Exchange for all your vending needs.
The notification caught Thrash off guard. He reviewed it, and then dived into his inventory. Sure enough, listed newest to oldest, the hoe sat at the top. He grinned enthusiastically. This would be an excellent choice for Pierre. Quickly, he drafted another message. He was able to add a gift, whether it was food, gold, or an item. He added the hoe, and then reviewed his message.
1 second ago: Thrash: Glad you’re home and sorted, Pierre. Attached a gift for you. Mush sends her regards.
Thrash felt better about himself after that. He cracked his neck again, then opened the Quest log. He turned in Pierre’s quest, earning another achievement. He pursued the rewards first, earning 10 gold pieces, bringing his total back up to 104. Mush would definitely be pleased, though he needed to seriously consider the next best upgrade choice.
The second reward was to choose between two skills, both of which were interesting.
Skill: Light of the Master
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Current Level: 1
The Light of the Master skill summons a mystical orb of light that guides you through the maze of dungeon floors, revealing the safest and quickest path to the exit. No more wandering aimlessly like some low-level chump.
Follow the light, dear. Join me, please. PLEASE.
Reward: Access to the Light Orb guide
Note: 1x use per dungeon descent.
Note: Earn skill experience each time the Light Orb successfully leads you to the dungeon floor's end. Levelling up increases the orb's range and precision.
Skill: One with the Foe
Current Level: 1
The One with the Foe skill grants you the ability to blend in with dungeon mobs, allowing you to slip by unnoticed for a short period.
Slipping by unnoticed is Mummy’s middle name.
Effects: Temporary mob invisibility.
Note: 180 second cooldown.
Note: Earn skill experience each time you successfully bypass an enemy unnoticed. Levelling up increases the duration and decreases detection chance.
‘Mush?’ Thrash called out, hoping for an answer. She didn’t respond. Without her, he couldn’t be sure as to whether or not he’d obtain better skills down the line. He might be able to acquire enough sway or rank that the mobs would turn away from him anyway, or if he ever found a minimap, the Light of the Master skill would be an unworthy choice now.
He called for Mush again, but she didn’t answer. He let out a puff of air, closing his eyes for just a moment while putting aside the skills. It would have to wait until tomorrow. He rubbed a hand down his face and slumped onto the bed, his gaze lazily flicking across the many things on his dashboard that needed his attention, but he couldn’t focus on any of them. He rolled onto his side, deep in thought. One last interface check told him he still had a viewer. He shook off the uncomfortable feeling, breathing deeply until his consciousness faded away.
----------------------------------------
‘Good morning, Dungeon Master!’ Mush exclaimed from above Thrash, her buzzing body rotating around like a baby’s crib toy. Thrash opened his eyes, quickly gazing at the clock on the wall. It was 5am, and his body felt weak, aching from his neck to his toes.
‘Dammit, Mush,’ he said, wishing for some early sunshine. ‘It’s not even morning yet.’
‘It is past dawn, man-child,’ the robot informed.
Thrash grunted, sitting up rubbing the sleep from his eyes. ‘I called for you last night. I needed your help.’
Thrash checked his interface. Nothing had changed. He had yet to receive a reply from Una, and Pierre was silent as well. Even further than that, Sam the Wise hadn’t replied. It was quiet - too quiet, really. Thrash didn’t like it.
‘Mush recommends you choose One with the Foe as your skill,’ she said, ignoring him. ‘Brigwell had both, of course, but Light of the Master can be obtained again later on in various formats. This one is more beneficial right now. Especially considering you really don’t understand dungeons.’
Thrash nodded, moving through his interface and selecting the recommended skill. He confirmed it, and then frowned at Mush as what she’d said dawned on him. ‘I don’t understand dungeons? What?’
Mush buzzed. ‘Brigwell knew that descending as quickly as possible can improve rewards and objectives at a faster rate. You take too long, staring at the clouds like a baby waiting for its mother’s milk. Or like a man waiting for a woman’s -’
Thrash rolled his eyes, cutting her short. ‘I’m Level 5, Mush, and in case you hadn’t noticed, it takes a while because something keeps interfering and throwing locked boss rooms my way. We’ll get there.’
‘I am already there,’ Mush repeated. ‘Eat breakfast and review your achievements.’
Mush used her extendable arm to pass a bowl of Miner’s Delight to Thrash, which he immediately started to snack on. He reviewed the achievements again. There were 5, the first from when he listed an item on the Vendor Exchange.
He cracked his knuckles, moving up from his bed and towards the wooden chair, sitting by the counter with his food. ‘Let them roll, Mush.’
Commiserations! You have earned the achievement ‘Boss Boy 2.0!’
You levelled up your boss boy title! You’re now marginally more terrifying!
You’re a step away from frightening the big dungeon bosses, but your presence is definitely unsettling the local wildlife. Good going, kiddo.
Reward: Boss Boy Gloves
Effect: Terrifying Grip: Your physical attacks have a 5% chance to deal critical strikes.
Effect: Dungeon Lord’s Detection: These gloves grant the wearer the ability to sense nearby boss-level enemies. The radius will increase as the wearer levels up.
‘Now that is one cool set of gloves,’ Thrash exclaimed, furiously happy with the reward, energy levels rising. ‘The 5% boost is awesome, but alerting me to nearby bosses? That’s been my biggest problem so far.’
Mush beeped with dismissal. ‘False. Mush has already informed you of your biggest problem, which is not continuously moving. You stay still, you give the floor time to catch up and defeat you. Brigwell knew this. Everyone knows this.’
‘Brigwell was here for hundreds of years,’ Thrash said, exaggerating slightly. ‘And I didn’t go to a dungeon training academy, Mush. I was told I’d have an AI to help with this stuff. One that would guide me, and push me in the right direction.’
Mush beeped again. ‘You were duped, man-child.’
Thrash grunted at her, equipping his new gloves. They were made from a thin material, a dark, velvety green colour. They glowed ever so slightly, kind of like Sigrid when her blade pulsed blue. Thrash was certainly pleased, looking at the next achievement.
Commiserations! You have earned the achievement ‘Press F to Pay Respects!’
You had your first viewer! How exciting! Someone’s watching your every move - and it isn’t your own mother!
Don’t die in front of strangers. That would be SO embarrassing.
Reward: Paparazzi Cap
Effect: Your base intelligence is increased by 10%.
Effect: Your magical resistance is increased by 10%.
‘Are you sure Dungeon Masters don’t follow any magical routes, Mush?’ Thrash asked again, the hat raising his intelligence stat from 23 to 25.3. He placed it on his head, a simple, black baseball cap that seemed to reflect light, glimmering with the candles on the wall. Despite the intelligence boost, he decided to mask the hat from his appearance, feeling that it clashed with his style.
‘They absolutely, unequivocally do not,’ Mush almost swore. ‘Brigwell would have never; that was completely against his beliefs.’
Thrash rolled his eyes. ‘Again, though - his beliefs. If I had an AI system here to guide me, what would she tell me, Mush?’
‘God knows,’ Mush said with a sigh. ‘Mush thinks that would be super helpful though, wouldn’t it?’
Thrash swore at her, drafting another quick message to Una.
1 second ago: Thrash: Can someone look into Mush? She is meant to guide me, right? I’m barely getting any help whatsoever.
The next achievement flashed on Thrash’s interface.
Commiserations! You have earned the achievement ‘Survived With Witnesses!’
You successfully guided someone through the dungeon for the first time!
Mummy will definitely let you babysit again.
Reward: 100x Dungeon Experience Points
Thrash checked in on Dungeon Management. He could see his progress under Rank E; he had earned 500 total dungeon experience points, halfway to Rank D. He didn’t bother mentioning it to Mush - she would dismiss it, and he was feeling quite proud of his progress.
Commiserations! You have earned the achievement ‘Don't Lowball Me!’
You sent an offer for an item to another adventurer!
The art of haggling is special. Hopefully, Mummy has taught you well. It’s all in the hips and the lips.
Reward: Ring of the Charming
Effect: Your base charisma is increased by 5%.
Thrash immediately equipped the item, holding his hand in front of him as if he had just got engaged. The ring had a golden band, with a small, heart shaped ruby as its centrepiece.
‘Beautiful,’ Mush said. ‘I am swooning, darling.’
Thrash smiled. His charisma had just stretched to 50.2 points - a figure that he felt comfortable with. With that and his titles - especially his Digital Nomad title - he would start saving more money on anything he brought, not to mention being able to better talk people into things. As far as he could remember, he had always enjoyed increasing his charisma.
He moved on to the final achievement.
Commiserations! You have earned the achievement ‘Can I Go Home Now?’
You turned in your first quest!
What a busy day! Mummy needs to catch her breath!
Don’t stop for too long, though. The next quest is right around the corner.
Reward: 100x Experience Points
‘Excellent. I’m nearly at Level 6, Mush. Does anything good happen there?’
‘Nothing that’ll make you stiff with excitement,’ she replied.
Thrash paused, giving her a pointed look. ‘Did you want to rephrase that?’
Mush considered him with a beep. ‘Brigwell was particularly stiff when he was excited. My references will remain intact.’
Thrash snorted, moving past it. ‘Fine, Mush. Listen, I found a whole bunch of stone on the Vendor Exchange, all listed by Dungeon Masters. When will I reach that point?’
Before she could answer, Thrash jumped in his skin, a flood of notifications rolling through his interface. He received messages from Una, Pierre, and Sam the Wise, not to mention the pile of updates coming in from the Vendor Exchange.
‘What the -’ he muttered, opening Una’s message.
4 hours ago: Una: You are being watched. We are looking into something. Stay alert.
3 hours ago: Una: Clarification. We have tasked an Adventurer to watch you. Do not stress.
33 minutes ago: Una: Doren has been detained. We can’t do anything to him, but he has shared your location with one other adventurer. Based on our information, there is a high possibility of an attack.
32 minutes ago: Una: Clarification. There is a high possibility of an attack on you.
5 minutes ago: Una: Oops. Adding a viewer glitched your system. Messages should be back to normal. Be patient with Mush. She is tied to you. However, magic and spells are commonly used by Dungeon Masters. Brigwell didn’t appreciate magic; she is copying him.
10 seconds ago: Una: Weird things happening your end. Someone is on the way, but they’re blocked from our view. Be careful. Do not die. I repeat, do not die.
Thrash straightened, eyes darting toward the portal. Nothing had happened yet, but he wasn’t about to ignore a warning like that. Before he could do anything, however, Mush spoke.
‘Mush recommends you move,’ she said quickly, buzzing above his head. Thrash didn’t waste any time, moving behind the counter, Sigrid at his waist. He sped through his inventory, highlighting anything that might help. He added the Sticky Webbing to the quick bar on his interface, alongside the Beastly Dungeon Bars. They were poor weapons, but they could help if he needed to run. He added a Floor One Ticket as well, just in case he needed to dive away.
The portal chimed, and Thrash paused, panic rising in his chest.
An Adventurer is on their way. Please close all interface windows and await arrival.