‘Well, now,’ a voice said, words drawn out and thoughtful. ‘Didn’t think I’d actually make it here.’
Thrash felt a huge relief wash over him and sent a quick message to Mush. This is better.
‘Welcome to Starr Eternal, Mines for the Everyday Hero,’ Thrash greeted the young man, arms spread wide, as though he’d always been a Dungeon Master. ‘How are you? It’s a pleasure to have you.’
‘Aye,’ the man said, looking him up and down. ‘Aye indeed.’
He was young, maybe even younger than Thrash. His cheeks were smooth, his frame scrappy and lean. There was a determined gleam in his hazel eyes, ambition flickering behind them. His wild, sandy-brown hair fell in tufts across his forehead, resting over his eyes. Despite his rustic appearance - brown overalls and muddy black boots - Thrash couldn’t help but sense the man was sharp, his eyes darting around and sizing up the dungeon base.
‘Pierre,’ the man said, extending a hand over the counter. Thrash shook it. ‘Farmer. Yer open for business?’
Pierre had a hint of apprehension on his face, like he wasn’t entirely sure why he was here or if he really wanted to be. Thrash could relate to that. He smiled compassionately.
‘Of course!’ Thrash said. ‘What can I do for you? Is this your first time in a dungeon?’
Pierre nodded gruffly, his eyes settling on Mush. ‘Funny-looking robot. How old are yer, lass?’
Lass? Mush swore to Thrash. ‘Welcome, Pierre. It is impolite to request a woman’s age.’
The farmer snorted, scuffing his boots on the ground. ‘Aye, yer right there. Me mam would’ve slapped me for that. Apologies, ma’am.’
Don’t accommodate her, Thrash thought. Mush jolted him with a tiny shock of electricity. Ouch, Mush!
‘But aye, this is me first trip,’ Pierre continued. ‘Me grandpa passed away, left the farm to me. I weren’t keen on the Adventurer's lifestyle, but me mam pushed me. Now, I need slime.’
The journey of all young farmers, Mush quipped, Thrash stifling a grunt of amusement.
‘I’m sorry to hear that,’ Thrash said. ‘But a farm sounds nice. Easy-going.’
You hate farms, Mush said.
He doesn’t need to know that. Quiet, Mush, I’m focusing.
Focusing on what?
‘Aye,’ Pierre agreed, gesturing to the chair. Thrash nodded, and Pierre sat down. ‘It’s a nice life. A little village to meself, a few other NPCs nearby. Yer welcome to visit.’
If his body language and clothes didn’t give him away as a farmer, his accent certainly did. It was unlike anything Thrash had ever heard, having grown up at Starr Training Base 1, surrounded by high-born, eloquent individuals. Farmers were outside his usual orbit - before today, he probably would have considered dealing with one beneath him.
No time like the present to change that, Thrash mused. He looks like he needs a friend more than I do.
Indeed, Mush chimed in.
‘I’d love to, but I’m stuck here,’ Thrash said. ‘My class is Dungeon Master, so I’m tied to this place.’
It wasn’t the whole truth, but Thrash didn’t feel like sharing the details of his imprisonment. He appreciated the invitation and didn’t want to turn away a potential ally.
‘Shame,’ Pierre said, sniffing. ‘Could’ve used yer help. Got a lot of mobs to clear out, see.’
Thrash nodded empathetically. The man was seeming less and less like a fighter. ‘I can relate to that. So, you need slime?’
‘Aye,’ he said. ‘For crafting. Stone, too, ideally.’
Thrash considered this. ‘Well, this is all fairly new to me, but I can help. I do have some slime for sale if you’d prefer not to go into the dungeons?’
Thrash regretted the offer, wanting to descend into the dungeon himself, but was instantly comforted.
‘Nah, sir, I need to gather them meself. Got a quest, see. Need at least twenty pieces.’
Thrash grinned. He could help with that. ‘Then the Caves of the Glade would be your best bet. Do you have any tools?’
He quickly inspected Pierre, the interface showing his details.
Pierre: Level 1
Race: Human
Class: Farmer
Wow, he’s literally brand new, Thrash thought.
Literally would imply brand new as of right now, Thrash. I don’t see his mother squatting nearby. Speak properly.
‘No tools,’ Pierre admitted. ‘Me inventory’s as empty as anything.’
Push him, Thrash. Make your first sale! Mush chimed excitedly.
‘What can I get for you, then?’ Thrash smiled.
‘Hm,’ Pierre muttered, glancing around the mostly empty room. ‘Do yer actually have anything?’
Thrash suddenly felt a pang of embarrassment. It dawned on him; his base was a mess - bare walls and scattered items. It had been cleaned, but not organised. He grabbed a rusty pickaxe from the nearby crate and set it on the counter beside Mummy’s Tea Set. After a moment’s thought, he also pulled out a few other items from the barrels.
‘This is free,’ he said, pushing the pickaxe toward Pierre. Pierre accepted it with a grateful nod. ‘These,’ Thrash gestured to the Health Apples and other sponsor-related items, ‘are just one gold piece each.’
Pierre considered them. ‘Aye, these will help. But I’m not convinced I’ll survive without a weapon, see?’
ESCORT QUESTS, THRASH - WHAT DID I TELL YOU?
Mush! Keep it down! Thrash winced.
‘I’d be more than happy to join you,’ Thrash offered, trying not to sound too eager. ‘I can escort you. I have the ability to set up parties as a Dungeon Master.’
Pierre hesitated, then nodded. ‘Yer not got any other tools or weapons?’
Thrash shook his head apologetically. ‘I’ve been into the dungeons twice myself. I do have one spare weapon, but it’s already promised to someone else.’
Pierre grunted but looked slightly relieved. ‘Aye, then I’ll be glad to have yer help.’
Thrash opened Dungeon Management and clicked through to the Party interface. A simple white box popped up, listing the names of those he’d recently encountered, Doren at the bottom. At the top was Pierre, spelled out in shiny letters. Thrash inspected the screen as a notification appeared.
Set up a Party before adding members
‘Bear with me,’ Thrash said to Pierre. ‘First time doing this.’
‘Sure,’ Pierre said, eyes following Mush as she hovered through the room.
Party set up complete. Name your party:
This narrative has been purloined without the author's approval. Report any appearances on Amazon.
Thrash considered this while an achievement chimed. Then, he sent out the invite.
Party Name: Quest for Slime
Invite to party: Pierre
‘Right!’ Thrash said. ‘Did that work?’
‘Aye!’ Pierre grinned, revealing a missing canine tooth. Thrash knew it worked when another spinning star appeared on his interface. ‘Which means yer should get this now…’
Quest Update: Quest for Slime
Accept quest?
‘Great name,’ Thrash commented. ‘Great minds think alike.’
Pierre nodded. ‘Seemed appropriate.’
Thrash continued reading through the quest.
New farmer, Pierre, has enlisted your support. He needs to acquire 20 slime before the day is out!
They say that boys will be boys, but don’t do what Mummy doesn’t want you to do. You know what I mean.
Reward 1: You will earn a new skill of your choosing.
Reward 2: Pierre offers 10x gold pieces
Only 10 gold? Mush grumbled. That’s hardly worth it. Pass!
He’s new, Mush. He’s Level 1. I imagine he has next to nothing - I am not passing.
He makes you look like you know what you’re doing, she added. Which is false, meaning you should pass.
Thrash accepted the quest, and Pierre sighed in relief. The number above the achievement star increased again, but Thrash figured he wouldn’t have time to review them until after their descent.
‘Excellent!’ Thrash said. ‘Now, do you want to purchase anything here before we head down? You can inspect each item for its description.’
Pierre had apparently already done so. ‘Other than yer apples - the healing ones, mind - do yer have any recommendations?’
Thrash thought for a moment. ‘Honestly, my friend, I do not. If slime’s your goal, I’d recommend a couple of apples and we’ll call it there.’
‘Right yer are,’ Pierre said with a smile. ‘I’ll take two apples, please.’
Thrash nodded, and a small trading window appeared on his interface. It was a basic system, far from the sophistication of the Basic Merchant Centre. Thrash placed the two Heath Apples in the window, but Pierre had already handed over two gold coins across the counter.
Hah, Mush laughed. Read the room, Thrash.
Thrash quickly closed the window, grabbing the coins and passing the apples across. His achievement star chimed. ‘Thanks, Pierre. Ready to go? Anything else you need before we head down?’
‘No, sir,’ Pierre said. ‘I’m ready.’
‘Commiserations,’ Mush said. ‘Thrash, I recommend checking Dungeon Management once more.’
Pierre waved a hand, signalling he was fine to wait, so Thrash took a quick look. A small notification bubble rested on the ‘Weekly Challenges’ icon. Thrash opened it, fireworks briefly sparkling before fading into a simple quest-like interface.
Commiserations! You have unlocked 'Weekly Challenges!’
Your dungeon has successfully reached Rank E. You can now partake in Weekly Challenges set out by the sponsors of your dungeons.
These challenges are rank-specific, designed to test your skills, push your limits, and reward you with valuable resources, powerful items, and even recognition among the top Dungeon Masters across the Starr Galaxy.
Each week brings a single fresh, unique trial. Invite your patrons, outsmart your challengers, and grow your dungeon’s rank.
You didn’t write this one, did you, Mush? Thrash asked.
Sponsors don’t allow AI interference for these messages.
Thrash quickly inspected the challenge. It was the last day of the week, so the challenge would reset tomorrow. He grinned as he read it.
Weekly Challenge: A Dozen Deaths
Sponsor: Caves of the Glade
The Caves of the Glade are overrun.
Objective: Defeat 12x enemies within the dungeon depths.
Reward 1: 100x Dungeon Experience Points
Reward 2: 1x Floor Staircase
Thrash accepted the challenge, and the quest appeared beneath Pierre’s in his quest tracker. Written in yellow text, it had a 12-hour countdown next to it. Another achievement chimed.
Commiserations, Thrash, Mush said.
Anything else? Thrash asked her.
You’ve got five achievements to review. They could be helpful for the journey ahead.
Excellent.
‘Hold on, Pierre. I just need to sort through some notifications.’
‘By all means,’ he replied. ‘At yer own pace, friend. I’ve got a few myself.’
Thrash let the descriptions flow before him.
Commiserations! You have earned the achievement ‘Squad Goals!’
You formed your first party!
There ain’t no party like a Squad Goal party! Let the chaos of teamwork begin.
Reward: You have acquired a new skill: Buff Bros
Effects: All members of your party now deal 10% more damage.
NOTE: Earn skill experience over time. Levelling up increases the percentage boost.
NOTE: The effects of this skill only apply when in a party of two or more.
Commiserations! You have earned the achievement ‘It’s a Party and You’re Invited!’
You invited someone to join your party for the first time!
You’ve officially taken responsibility for a new being. It’s like you’ve had a child… Mummy is so happy her family is growing.
Reward: You have acquired a new skill: Party all the Time
Effects: All members of your party now receive an additional 5% experience boost.
NOTE: Earn skill experience over time. Levelling up increases the percentage boost.
NOTE: The effects of this skill only apply when in a party of two or more.
Commiserations! You have earned the achievement ‘HELP NEEDED!’
You have been asked to assist with a quest.
One quest, two quest, three quest, four,
Five quest, six quest, Mummy wants more!
Reward: 100x Experience Points
Commiserations! You have earned the achievement ‘Pawn Star in the Making!’
You’ve sold your first item in person!
You’ve completed a face-to-face transaction without being swindled or mugged! MUMMY IS PROUD OF HER NEW PAWN STAR!
Reward: 25x Gold Pieces
Commiserations! You have earned the achievement ‘Wait, What Did I Sign Up To?’
You accepted a weekly challenge for the first time!
Don’t get too excited… Sponsors need free labour and Dungeon Masters like you are the ideal choice. But hey, the rewards will totally be worth it. Right?
Right?
Reward: You now receive +10% XP for all weekly challenge completions.
Reward: 50x Dungeon Experience Points
Mush, those new party skills are great. It would be way better if they activated when outside of a party, but they’ll work for now.
Mush agrees, Mush replied. You also received 25 gold. Do you want me to start a piggy bank for your bedroom?
Thrash shook his head. Not yet, Mush.
Fine. Man-child.
‘Right!’ Thrash announced, letting Mush sulk for a moment. His eyes caught Mummy’s Tea Set, a tingle of frustration rising through him; there was almost too much to do. ‘Oh, shit - last thing, Pierre.’
Thrash poured out two cups of the tea. No boiling water was required - it seemed to have an endless supply. Mush had placed two mugs next to it; where she found them, Thrash didn’t know, but he wasn’t asking questions. He needed a stat boost for the journey, especially if multiple floors were involved. He grabbed a couple of apples for himself as well.
Pierre accepted the mug, eyeing it sceptically. ‘Mummy’s Tea Set?’
Thrash rolled his eyes. ‘This dungeon seems determined to embarrass me. Mush here likes playing mother.’
Pierre grinned. ‘That’s funny, that is.’
Thrash couldn’t help but feel attached to the kid. Even though they were about the same age, Thrash felt a sense of responsibility toward him. He couldn’t remember whether or not he’d felt similarly about his old crew. He imagined not; he couldn’t recall feeling strongly about anyone before. Empathy hadn’t been a big emotion for him. Yet now, he just wanted to ruffle Pierre’s hair and send him off with a big barrel of slime.
Mush pretended to sniff, his interface dinging. My little boy is growing up.
Pierre downed his tea, his eyes widening as his interface updated. ‘Cool,’ he said. ‘15% health boost.’
‘Excellent,’ Thrash said, drinking his own.
Commiserations! You have a temporary 15% attack boost.
WARNING: This boost will end at midnight tonight. You can receive a new boost tomorrow.
‘Phew, an attack boost’ Thrash remarked to Pierre. He patted Sigrid, sheathed at his side. ‘She’s a good sword, but needs levelling.’
Pierre nodded. ‘Ready when yer are, sir.’
Thrash saluted Mush. ‘See you soon, Mush.’
‘Good luck, Pierre and company,’ Mush said.
And company? Thrash muttered. Asshole.
Mummy loves you, Thrash.