“Well that was easy.”
Inspector Saul returned to the investigation room with a cup of coffee. Even if it was late in the night, he felt pretty good. So much so he had a light skip to his step as he came in to meet up with his investigators.
All of which were at their desks and cubicles, half or dead asleep.
“Hey, hey, hey.” He roared “Wake up! You all have reports to finish up. I want them ready on my desk the very first morning!”
Constable Barry and Allen snapped awake from their power nap. They stretched at their desk before groaning and clattering away at their computer. Only to nod off and their eyes lids growing heavier than lead.
Constable Sally bolted awake in a chair in the corner and jumped to her feet with a salute. “Good morning sir!”
“Sally, it’s still 1:35 AM.”
“Oh come ooon.” The constable dropped back in her chair, slapping a hand on a series of paper she was sorting. “My kids won’t sleep without me telling them a story. We got the murderer, dead to rights. We’re good to go right? Surely we can finish the clean up work in the morning!”
“Not yet!” Inspector Saul snapped, and whipped his head to the side to hide a small yawn. “News about this case has spread like wild fire, all over the internet! Murder in the hotel, suspect caught. If we mess up now, the chief commissioner will have all of our badges with his breakfast burrito!”
Constable Allen opened his draw to pick up some candy. He stuffed some gummy worms into his mouth as he spoke. “But sir. The suspect hasn’t confessed yet. Is it really a good idea to rush the procedures?”
“Hah! It’s only a matter of time before she gives up playing her mind games!” Inspector Saul chirped. “Might as well have everything ready to charge her! Cased closed in a fort night. Hahahaha...By the way, where is she? I didn’t see the suspect in the cells.”
Constable Sally groaned. “Of course not. She passed out in the middle of our interview. Had to send her to the infirmary.”
Inspector Saul stepped over and patted a certain constable on the back. “Barry, get your hat. Go down to the infirmary with some officers. I want her under watch and guard for the next 48 hours – around the clock. She is a murderer after all, she could be dangerous! So stay vigilant!”
“Wuuu?” Constable Barry stood up to protest, but the Inspector glared and he shrivelled down. “...Yeeeees siiiiiiir.”
Constable Barry finished up his report draft and saved it onto a USB drive. He handed it over to his buddy, Constable Allen, who agreed to finish up the paperwork for him. After exchange a cool homie handshake, they parted ways to carry out their work. Peace out brother.
Inspector Saul shook his head, only to catch some glares and sneers. “Come ooon, don’t give me that look. You know how hard it is to be a good team leader!? I got my OWN superiors breathing down my neck too! Okay look, if we do this right, we all might get a promotion. If not, at least a raise in pay. You all want that right?”
Mumbling agreements. Murmur, murmur...Zzzzzzz—Snrrk. We’re up, we’re up!
“See! No problem....Hey wait.” Inspector Saul turned around. “Where’s Romanov?”
Constable Sally slapped a hand to her forehead. “Oh crap. I forgot to call him.”
“Wait, he thinks the murderer is still out in the city?...Call him! Call him now!”
“Y-y-yes sir.” Constable Sally fumbled for her phone and turned to face the wall, to try and get a hold of her teammate.
Inspector Saul pinched his nose bridge. “Alright. No one is to go home until they finish their reports. And triple check, APA citations, the works!”
As Constable Allen tried to keep his eyes open, he noticed something. “Sir. Where are you going?”
“I-I am going to return to the crime scene to double check something. Carry on. No slacking now!”
Before anyone could stop him the Inspector snuck out the door.
“Wu—Hey!” Constable Sally snapped after she finished making the call! “That stinking – did that bastard just went home?”
Constable Allen rolled his eyes, flicking his fingers in an air quote “Said he was going back to the ‘crime scene’ and ‘check anything missing’, you know.”
“That no good...uuugh.”
“Heeeeeey guuuys.” A brand new cheery voice came into the office.
Love this novel? Read it on Royal Road to ensure the author gets credit.
The double doors swept open, allowing a young woman to saunter in. She wasn’t wearing a uniform, instead a well kept dress shirt and a curve fitting pencil-skirt. Pantyhose warmed up her long legs as she balanced on stylish high heels. A police ID with her face and crisp smile dangled on a blue lanyard that danced across the hill of her chest.
=======================================
Constable Eve
Police Secretary
Crime Investigation Division (C.I.D.), Precinct 9.
=======================================
“Oh-oh-oh.” Eve called out to her bestie “Why the long face Sally-boo?”
“What else?” Constable Sally shrugged with a scoff. “The rat-ass inspector abandoned ship. Went home without us. Again!”
“Well let’s rectify that shall we~” The Police Secretary held out her hand. “Everyone hand over their reports on a USB, leave it to me. You’re all, dismissed~!”
Two seconds.
That’s all the time needed. Constable Sally and Constable Allen were on the verge of breaking down into tears as they jammed their unfinished reports into their USB sticks and placed them gingerly on Eve’s soft palm.
Constable Allen clapped his hands together, praise the lord! “Thanks a million luv. See you tomorrow!”
“Ta-taa~!”
Constable Sally swept a huge hug in return before she side-hopped to the door. “You’re a life saver! My bestie!”
“Sweet dreams—Oh-oh-oh. Tell your kids Auntie Eve said ‘She loves theeeem’. Don’t forget the blow kiss~”
Eve waved off the two Constables as they rushed out of the office. The moment the door closed, she let out a sigh of content.
And whipped around to slap a folder a sleeping face of a Shaggy Mongrel.
SMACK!
“OOOOOOOOF!” Detective Merlin reeled his head off his desk, rubbing his bruised forehead. He seethed in pain as he gripped at the corner of his table, rolling back and forth on his office chair to brace against the waves of pain coursing through his body. “Eve! How many times do I have to tell you, if you want my attention leave a voice mail!”
“Stop fooling around Merlin!” Eve snapped, like a mother to a disobedient child. “We all know you’re just day dreaming.”
“...You think solving the Headless Jockey Rider last month was day dreaming?”
“Fluke. Fluuuuuke.” The Police Secretary stuck her tongue out flicked her hair back, before she cracked a grin only gremlin little sisters would give. “Come ooooon. Give me your repoooort. I’ll finish it up for you so you can go home.”
Detective Merlin wagged a finger, unable to resist an equally teasing laugh. He rose up, plucking a strip of Teriyaki jerky from an open bag across his desk... Dear god, the expiry date was how long ago!?
With a small stretch from his rest, he pinched up and dropped a USB with his fingers into Eve’s palm. “Don’t you ever get tired playing the good guy? It’s almost 2 AM by all accounts, you’re killing your beauty sleep.”
“Faah!,” snorted Eve. “The bastard inspector gave me HIS report to write up, and he didn’t bother to start with an introduction. Can’t help it if I’m a slave a to government paychecks.”
Even couldn’t resist a giggle as she added, “Besides, as the saying goes: one good deed, one step closer to heaven. Not to mention if you all did power through the night – I’ll end up editing monstrosity of pages after another. Why not just do it yourself, perfectly~. Saves time, don’t you agree? Clock out already, you’re tired aren’t you?”
“Now that you mention it, you’re right. I deserve some shut eye.” The detective chuckled – then did the unthinkable.
He walked over to a closet near his desk and dragged out some strange bags. One by one he would open and unfold them, rolling them out like table clothes and...lay them across the ground.
...A SLEEPING BAG!?”
Eve rolled her eyes and just ignored the spectacular sight, “Honestly Merlin. Are you afraid to go back home or are you behind on rent? This is a police station, not a shelter for the homeless. You can’t keep camping out in your own workspace like this.”
“Bro! What do you expect me to do? My apartment is literally on the other end of the Big City. Be it taxi, bus, metro, or even on foot – by the time I ring my own buzzer I got to walk all the way back for work! Why go through all that trouble when I can sleep over. And think of it this way – I shall protect your beautiful person through the night.”
“Tch. I have better chances of survival if I rely on a drugged up dog versus you. You’re the kind of guy who can snore through a nuclear fallout.”
“Come now, no need to exaggerate.” Detective Merlin snickered as he kicked off his shoes and plucked off his old socks. “Go ahead, turn on your favorite jazz. Watch a soap opera. Play ASMR if you want – not like I’m going to report you.”
Eve shook her head at his antics and can’t help a laugh while she got herself comfortable at her desk, “How do you even shower if you keep this up?”
Detective Merlin rolled back across his sleeping bag, folding his hands behind his head, “Surely you have heard of Precinct 9’s greatest urban legend: The Phantom – of the Third Floor Showers! FIGARO! FIGARO! FIGARO! FIGARO~!”
The police secretary simply snorted and zoned out the noise to focus on her typing. The moment her fingers touched the keyboard, the detective heard a machine gun of tapping at mach speed. How can she do that with those ridiculously long press on nails!?
Now that he realized it – the machine gun noise was kinda distracting. Hard to sleep at this rate no matter how tired he was. Detective Merlin tossed to the left, tossed to the right, before he tried to do a kip up flip – more like kip flop – and stumbled to his feet.
“Say, Eve. That evidence bin Sally brought with us to question the suspect. Where is it?”
“Hmm? Ah it’s right under the table, over there. See it?”
The detective waddled over on his bare feet to drag the plastic bin full of evidence of the recent murder. Seeing as the typing will keep him up, might as well think about things before he can really pass out on the bed.
“Thank you ever so much Eve my darling! Always know, I am first in line for your hand in marriage!”
“Hah. I rather take my chances with a nuclear fall out.”