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Junkyard Magician
Two's a company, three's a noise

Two's a company, three's a noise

*DING*

New title received Arrow Cushion “Needles and pins, arrows and spears… plucking all that out of your bum shall be a pain and, did I mention it will hurt like, a lot. At least you’re still alive.” Damage received from projectile attacks -63% Projectiles can no longer deal critical damage to your body. Chance to avoid projectiles -20% Chance to deflect projectiles -20% Arrows stuck in your butt will add +600% more pain than normal. Chance to get hit in the bum +17%

*DING*

Recovery complete

*DING*

Since you have fully recovered, the effects of perfect pillow no longer apply

.

Wha-what?! Who said I allowed that!

Neira stirred in her sleep. Her hand found the magic leaver and worked the special motion.

*DING*

E-ERROR. I-ILLEGAL INPUT D-D-DETECTED!

*DING*

Perfect pillow effects re-applied. (Cheater!)

Now, that’s how it should be!

She nuzzled herself against her useless master. After all, she was a woman with needs.

*DING*

WARNING! UNKNOWN PRESENCE DETECTED! (Smells like a female!)

Neira’s eyes burst wide open and wide awake. Across her, a drooling human girl humped the arm of her pillow.

She coiled her leg towards her belly then straightening it like an unwinding spring, she kicked the intruder out of her bed.

In one fluid motion she rolled of the bed, straddled the human girl, and send her fist flying toward the stranger’s face. Unexpectedly, an inch off the human’s face, Neira’s fist froze in place without reaching its target. She tried repeatedly yet all her attacks were stopped right before any hit could connect.

“I see you recovered as well? Joe’s messed up magic strikes again…”

Savile entered the room, a brush still in her hand.

Stolen from Royal Road, this story should be reported if encountered on Amazon.

“Oy, tin can! What in the flea infested, rotting rug is going on? Why can’t I hit her and… where is this?”

“We’re in the Valga village. As to why you can’t hit her, see for yourself.”

Neira looked back to the naked girl squirming underneath her and pointing at her she spoke.

“Status!”

*DING*

Name Alia Gender Female Level: 39 Age: 19 Race: Human Class: Warrior Status: Temporary property of Joe Detained: Physical and magical skills disabled. Cannot attack. Must remain within one hundred steps of her master In debt: Your life was saved. It will cost you. Either pay up, work it off or become a full-time slave. Current balance: -997 892.24 gold. To see the full list, master access is required.

Eh?! Another one? What a useless master indeed.

Half-hearted, she again aimed her fist at the stranger trembling underneath her but like before it stopped a hairs width of the human’s face.

*DING*

Warning, you are trying to damage master’s property. Cease your action immediately or you shall be punished (Bedwarmer title and all associated privileges shall be revoked.)

Grumbling and cussing at all that exist (well, Joe mostly) the demi slid off her victim and got up. Her bones rattled as she stretched. She eyed her companion and froze.

“Huh? Why have you shaved your ass? Don’t tell me there are lice in here… and what in burning fleapit are those! ”

She pointed at Savil’s chest, the mountains that perked there and the deep valley between them.

“Joe’s magic.” The knight responded then sneezed.

“It’s so damn breezy. How those humans can handle not having fur just eludes me…”

“Then get some pants on and stop making noise. I’m trying to sleep here.”

Joe groaned, hiding his head in his arms. He spent, gods know how long, learning entirely new coding language that made use of nine dimensions and his head ended up as a home for queen bitch of all migraines. Writing parallel control statements based on Schrodinger’s law did not help his mental health either.

“What about the quest weren’t we on a tight deadline?”

“We got an extension…”

“Oy, shitty master what the hell is going on in here? I’m sure we were getting stomped at the bridge and puff, now we’re here and you’re acting as if nothing happened!”

Joe let out a sigh. He really didn’t have the strength for it but maybe if he does it now, they may let him rest for a bit?

“Patchwork, take the freeloader and do the rounds. Make sure the village is safe. Bedwarmer bed, now.”

He patted the bed beside him.

“Eh?”

“No squawking, get in here and you two get out.”

Forced by the seal of obedience the slaves complied.

“Closer.” He ordered as they left alone.

Yet again, pushed by the seal, Neira obeyed. Her body climbed atop her master without any input from her conscious will. She was used to that. Her old master played with her body all the time, making her do things…

“Closer.”

Slowly her body lowered itself until their lips touched, sending sparks running through her fur and jumping between her ears. Something within her cracked and shattered releasing a flood of immense energy.

Surprised, she watched him for a moment before her eyes lost focus and went sideways. Unconscious and unaware, Neira spend the rest of the day snoring atop her master as dings and dongs rung all around her.

*DING*

Update detected. Downloading… Done. Installing… Done.

*DING*

New class available. Apply? Yes No