Chapter 41 - Encounter with Tsunade

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Meanwhile, at the pool, Mi Blade had grand romantic ambitions. He envisioned sneaking in some quality whispering time with Naka, dreaming that this trip would draw them closer.

He had a whole master plan lined up for romance—until it all crashed and burned like a poorly timed jutsu.

Instead of a cozy, intimate moment, there they were: four people awkwardly squeezed into a tiny hot spring. Tsunade was soaking in her own corner like a slumbering dragon, snoring softly and looking far too comfortable for the setting.

Mi Blade quickly realized he had zero chances of pulling off anything remotely romantic in this hilariously chaotic environment.

So, there they sat, looking like a bunch of confused kids trapped in a comedy skit, with Mi Blade mentally facepalming at the absurdity of it all. It was going to be a long day!

Mi Blade grabbed Naka’s hand under the water, casting furtive glances around like a ninja plotting a covert operation. The problem?

Shizune was watching them with the intensity of a hawk swooping down on its prey—six of them, or at least that’s how it felt. Seriously, the guy had eyes sharper than a kunai, and Mi Blade could practically feel them drilling into his back.

Tsunade was still snoozing in her corner, blissfully unaware of the awkwardness brewing like a storm cloud above their heads. She was snoring lightly, a sound reminiscent of a boulder rolling down a hill.

Mi Blade knew better than to wake the beast; that woman could drink a barrel of sake and still punch a mountain in half without breaking a sweat.

The atmosphere was so thick with awkwardness it felt like a dense fog had settled over the hot spring.

Mi Blade longed for the good old days when he’d hang out with Asuma and Kurenai. Sure, those two were always all over each other like a pair of overly affectionate puppies, but at least they weren’t as painfully awkward as this.

With Asuma around, he could annoy him into oblivion, and the tension would dissipate like mist in the morning sun.

In a moment of sheer desperation, Mi Blade leaned his head on Naka’s shoulder, careful to avoid looking in Tsunade’s direction—especially not toward the two legendary “mountains” that were bobbing lazily in the pool like buoys in a sea of awkwardness.

Naka, sensing the vibe, gently pressed her head against his shoulder, making them look like they were rehearsing for a scene in a painfully cheesy school play.

The kind where everyone awkwardly pretends to be in love, but you can practically hear the crickets chirping in the background.

Just when they thought they might get away with their little moment, Tsunade cracked open one lazy eye, catching them in the act. She didn’t look impressed; instead, she wore an amused expression as if she’d witnessed this same scenario a million times before.

“Oi, kid,” Tsunade muttered, her voice slurred with relaxation and just a hint of mischief.

“Any funny stories from the village lately? Or has it been just as dull as this?”

Mi Blade froze like a deer caught in the headlights. Funny stories? He could hardly think of anything amusing while Tsunade lounged like a cat ready to pounce, her eyes glinting with the thrill of potential entertainment.

He racked his brain, but all he could conjure were the countless embarrassing moments he’d rather forget—like that time he tried to impress Naka with a jutsu and ended up face-planting into a mud puddle.

“Um… well,” he stammered, feeling the heat creep up his cheeks, “I could tell you about the time I tried to cook dinner for everyone and nearly burned the whole place down…”

Tsunade left the village like she was trying to escape a bad rom-com. First, her boyfriend bit the dust in the Second Great Ninja War, then her brother followed suit, and just for good measure, she developed a crippling phobia of blood.

Because who doesn’t want to throw a little drama into their life, right?

Enjoying this book? Seek out the original to ensure the author gets credit.

Oh, and let’s not forget how completely fed up she was with the village's management—like a disgruntled employee finally deciding enough was enough.

So, she packed her bags and noped right out of there. But deep down, Konoha was still her grandpa’s village—literally. She had a soft spot for the place, even if she constantly griped about how every Hokage was a certified idiot.

The second Sarutobi kicked the bucket, though? She sprinted back to claim the Hokage hat like it was a lost wallet she’d been searching for.

“There’s nothing really exciting going on in the village,” Mi Blade began, setting the stage for a thrilling tale.

“But Master Jiraiya left a few years ago and hasn’t been back since. Apparently, he’s been traveling around ‘gathering materials’ to write books.”

Tsunade rolled her eyes so hard it looked like they were about to pop out of her head.

“Pfft, what kind of good stories could that pervy sage come up with?” she said, waving her hand dismissively as if trying to shoo away a pesky fly.

She knew exactly who Jiraiya was: the lovable idiot, the original class clown. The guy once published a book, and let’s just say the sales figures were less than stellar.

We’re talking about a bestseller in the “How to Get Rejected by Women” genre.

“Oh, and Hokage-sama’s been looking pretty sharp lately,” Mi Blade added, trying to keep the conversation rolling.

“But, uh… I’ve noticed he gets nosebleeds a lot when he’s in the Hokage’s office. I guess it must be from getting too angry.”

Tsunade nearly spat out her drink, laughing like she just heard the best punchline ever.

“Angry? Yeah, right! He’s not angry—he’s a pervert!”

Tsunade knew Sarutobi’s crystal ball wasn’t just for “monitoring the village.” Oh no, it was more like a high-tech periscope for “monitoring” the women’s bathhouse. In charge of the village?

More like in charge of bath time shenanigans. What a legacy!

“Well, my father, my biggest hobby these days is walking dogs and studying ninjutsu,” Mi Blade continued, trying to keep the mood light.

“Kakashi and I wanted him to keep going, but honestly, he seems more interested in napping.”

Tsunade scratched her nose, nodding along. “You know, Konoha has its charm, even though… isn’t it weird when someone older than you feels like a child?”

She stared at Mi Blade, thinking, If it weren’t for this kid, Shumao would have had a spotless record. But no, even heroes mess up. Men, am I right?

“My teacher is busy studying cloning technology… and, oh yeah, improving a little technique called ‘Reincarnation of the Filthy Land’…”

“Wait, hold on!” Tsunade shot up like a jack-in-the-box, all serious now. “Did you just say Reincarnation of the Filthy Land?!”

“Yup, you heard right,” Mi Blade nodded, as Naka slowly lifted her head off his shoulder, suddenly very awake.

“This is a technique developed by the Second Hokage. It brings souls from the afterlife back to the world of the living.”

Tsunade’s face tightened like she’d just bitten into a lemon. She knew this ninjutsu—bringing back dead bodies and their souls like it was some kind of macabre party trick. And let’s not forget the little detail that you had to sacrifice someone’s life just to get the ball rolling. It was classified as a forbidden technique, straight up evil.

Tsunade slapped the wall in frustration, and with a bang, Naka practically flew off the ground like a startled cat.

“How could anyone learn such a ridiculous ninjutsu?!”

Silence fell, and Naka blinked, thinking, Okay, but… it’s kinda cool, right?

Mi Blade cleared his throat like a sage preparing to drop some wisdom bombs. He leaned in, looking serious, which was quite the feat considering he was still wearing a towel like it was a fashion statement.

“Master Tsunade, chill, please! Ninjutsu isn’t inherently evil or good. It’s like when you find a stray kitten—sure, it’s cute, but it could also turn your couch into a scratching post! It all depends on how you handle it.”

Tsunade shot him a glare so sharp it could slice through steel, but Mi Blade wasn’t done. No way. He was on a roll.

“The master figured out that summoning the dead requires a living sacrifice. Yeah, that’s a major red flag. So he’s been trying to fix that little hiccup.

"Besides, it could be useful if the village needs backup in a pinch. Imagine the look on the enemy’s faces when they get greeted by the ghosts of Konoha’s past!”

“Also,” he added with a conspiratorial tone, “I think he just misses his old students. Probably wants to bring them back for a group hug and an apology or something. You know how emotional ninjas can get.”

Mi Blade met Tsunade’s eyes like he was about to drop a cosmic truth. “After all, this has been weighing on him. His heart can’t take it!”

Tsunade’s anger fizzled out like a soda left open overnight. She leaned against the stone wall, looking deflated.

“Repent? Really? What good is that now?” She sighed, rolling her eyes as if to say, “This is utterly ridiculous.”

Meanwhile, Mi Blade was breathing easier. Good, she’s calming down. Thank the gods!

In his head, he thought, Orochimaru, buddy, do you even realize the lengths your disciple is going for you? Even if you go full villain mode in the future, Tsunade’s still gonna be like, ‘But remember the good ol' days?’

Yeah, okay, some of what Mi Blade said was utter nonsense, but hey, not all of it was terrible.

I mean, Orochimaru did jazz up the Reincarnation of the Filthy Land technique, right? That’s a solid Yes!

And Orochimaru, come on, do you regret what happened to Senju Nawaki? Of course, you do!

So, did he fix the technique to make amends with the poor guy? Well, who the heck knows?

Either way, Mi Blade figured that when it came down to it, Tsunade would still go soft if she saw Orochimaru’s sad snake eyes.

Tsunade stood up, grabbing a towel with all the enthusiasm of someone who just realized they’ve been sitting in a hot spring for too long.

“Alright, kiddos, I’m heading back to my room to rest. You three… uh, do whatever.” And off she went, probably plotting her next epic nap.

"You walk slowly!" they called after her, watching as she ambled away like a tortoise in a marathon.

Now that Tsunade had vacated the scene, Mi Blade felt a surge of confidence. He sidled up to Naka with a grin plastered on his face, thinking, Finally, time for some sweet romance! But instead of scooting closer, Naka instantly switched spots. Not to be nearer to him, mind you, but right next to Shizune.

Mi Blade’s grin froze in place like a deer caught in headlights. Oh, I see how it is. No love for the Blade!

“Hey, sis, do you think Tsunade-sama’s okay?” Naka asked, her voice dripping with concern.

“She’s fine, probably just remembered something sad. She’ll be good after a night’s sleep,” Shizune replied, waving her hand like it was no big deal.

“You’ve had it tough traveling with Tsunade-sama, huh?” Naka said, trying her hardest to be sympathetic.

“Meh, it’s not so bad,” Shizune shrugged. “Except when she gambles away all our money… which is, like, all the time.”

Mi Blade, thoroughly ignored, stared at the ceiling, contemplating his life choices. So I’m the clown now, huh?

At that moment, he didn’t even feel like soaking in the hot spring anymore. With all the enthusiasm of a soggy noodle, he dried off and headed back to his room, thinking maybe Naka would come in later… or maybe not.

But no. He waited all night like a kid waiting for Santa Claus, and Naka didn’t show up. Great! Now it's awkward, and I’m stuck in the Tsunade zone!

The next morning, Mi Blade had officially reached his breaking point. As they were finishing breakfast, he turned to Naka with a determined expression.

“We need to get out of here. Seriously. We’re disturbing Tsunade-sama, and this is killing our ‘alone time.’” He gestured dramatically, as if he were auditioning for a soap opera.

“But I promised Lady Shizune she’d teach me medical ninjutsu today,” Naka protested, her eyes wide with innocence.

Mi Blade waved his hand dismissively like it was a pesky fly buzzing around his head.

“Sure, but does Shizune know how to perform heart surgery? Because I think I’m about to have one!”

He leaned back, trying to look as nonchalant as possible while internally plotting his escape from the clingy Tsunade drama.