Chapter 36 - The tests of the Ryuchi Cave
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In the shadowy depths of Ryuchi Cave, Orochimaru stood beside the White Snake Immortal, wearing a grin that could only be described as "I can’t believe this is happening." His amusement radiated off him, akin to a child watching a hilariously catastrophic fail video unfold before their eyes.
“So, White Snake Immortal,” he began, tilting his head with a playful smirk that danced across his lips, “is this the third-level test? Or did you accidentally leave the illusion settings on from last week’s ‘Ninja Spa Day’? You know, the one where everyone got mud masks and cucumber slices?” His tone dripped with sarcasm, as he gestured vaguely at the chaotic scene unfolding before them.
Before them, Kakashi and Mi Blade stumbled around in a daze, lost in an illusion that felt more like a nightmarish dream than a genuine test.
“What a powerful illusion,” Orochimaru mused, scratching his chin thoughtfully.
“Those who aren’t mentally prepared are likely to wander around like chickens without heads! Or like me trying to navigate a grocery store without a list! Seriously, it’s chaos!” His laughter echoed off the cavern walls, filling the air with an absurd sense of delight.
The White Snake Fairy chuckled nervously, flipping her hair over her shoulder with an air of confidence that screamed,
“I totally know what I’m doing.” “Oh, no, no! This is a test of genius, of course! A very sophisticated test!” she declared, puffing out her chest like a proud peacock, though her bravado seemed shaky at best.
“Right,” Orochimaru replied, struggling not to roll his eyes so hard they got stuck.
“Because what’s more genius than trapping two seven-year-olds in a world where they think they’ve reunited with their long-lost parents? What’s next, a surprise birthday party for them? Balloons and confetti?” The incredulity in his voice made it clear he found the whole situation utterly ridiculous.
The White Snake Fairy crossed her arms defiantly, her indignant pout almost comical in its intensity.
“Hey! I’m a professional here! Do you think I want to lose my reputation as the illustrious White Snake Fairy? These kids come into my holy land, mock my food—my carefully prepared illusionary food!—and make me look like a total fool?!” Her voice reached a pitch that could make any dog howl in response.
“I mean,” Orochimaru added, leaning casually against the cave wall, a grin playing at the corners of his mouth, “you did let them walk into a trap that makes a maze look like a straight line. Your reputation is safe, though. I’m sure no one else has ever made kids cry this quickly! It’s like a record-breaking achievement!”
“Exactly, the first test is to measure their carnal basic desire and they did pass with flying colors. The second text is to test their skills and adaptability and I'm betting it would take some time but no, it's only been an hour. And yet this third test is for their deepest desire!"
The white shake fairy exclaimed.
Back in Mi Blade's illusion, he clung to the comforting embrace of his parents, feeling the familiar warmth of home wash over him.
The soft couch beneath him felt like a cloud, and the smell of his mom’s homemade cookies filled the air. But despite the nostalgia, a nagging voice whispered in the back of his mind that this wasn’t real.
“I want this,” he admitted, tears brimming in his eyes, “but I can’t stay here. I know this is a test. But I’m grateful. I just really miss Mom and Dad!”
“Mi Blade!” his dad's voice echoed, but now it warped into an eerie, comedic tone. “He’s not a kid anymore, honey! Let him do what he needs to do! We can cheer him on from the sidelines like the world’s most supportive fans!”
His mom chimed in, her voice almost theatrical. “Exactly! Just imagine us with pom-poms! ‘Go, Mi Blade, go! Live your best life!’”
“Thanks, Mom! Thanks, Dad!” Mi Blade chuckled through his tears, appreciating their lightheartedness in a serious moment.
“I will. I will do what you always remind me: to live happy, even if it means I have to leave my home-cooked meals behind!”
With newfound resolve, Mi Blade formed hand signs to disrupt the chakra that held him in the illusion.
“Sorry, but I can’t stay in this comfy bubble. I have a destiny to fulfill!”
As he released the chakra, the room shattered into shards of light, dissipating into nothingness. Mi Blade blinked and found himself back in the cave, standing beside his dazed half-brother, who looked like he had just woken up from a particularly confusing dream.
“Did I miss the cookie party?” Mi Blade joked, trying to lighten the mood.
His brother couldn't respond as Kakashi was struggling against his own illusion.
“This isn’t real!” he shouted, shaking his head violently, as if he were trying to clear the cobwebs from his mind. “I can’t let this trap me! I have enough pillows on my bed already!”
A young genin’s encouraging words twisted, taking on a mocking tone. “You deserve this, Kakashi! Why fight it? The soft bed, the snacks, the endless ramen!”
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“No!” Kakashi growled, shaking his head as he fought the mental binds wrapping around him.
“I have a path to walk, and it doesn’t end here! I can’t let a cozy chair and unlimited food distract me from my responsibilities!”
With a surge of willpower, he grasped at his chakra, feeling the energy within him flare to life.
“I’ve faced worse than this! Like that time I accidentally entered the wrong room during a mission and walked in on a dance party!”
As the shimmering light faded and the cave returned to view, Ichikishimahime reappeared, her eyes filled with understanding.
“You have faced the temptations of illusion and shown your strength. The test of trust is not only in others but in yourselves. Remember, the most powerful bonds are formed not just through desire but through shared struggles and perseverance.”
Mi Blade nodded, still processing the experience.
“She has a point,” he sighed, grateful about the third test.
“And at least I got to say goodbye to my parents on Earth. Plus, they were totally on board with my ninja life! If only they’d send a care package with some of those cookies…”
Kakashi smirked, crossing his arms. “Care packages and free hugs? Now that’s a real dream scenario."
Orochimaru and the White Snake Immortal, who had been enjoying this wild holographic reality show, were glued to the scene like children in front of a Saturday morning cartoon.
The White Snake Immortal maintained her calm demeanor, sipping tea with the grace of a seasoned observer, but her eyes betrayed her eagerness, mirroring the excitement that pulsed in the air.
Orochimaru, on the other hand, was genuinely taken aback, his eyes widening like saucers as he witnessed this unexpected turn of events.
“Wait a minute… Mi Blade, the child of a Uchiha and Hatake, just awakened the Sharingan? This is better than binge-watching ninja dramas!”
Orochimaru exclaimed, practically vibrating with excitement as if he had stumbled upon a rare gem.
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Miblade also knows about the awakening of his eyes. He directly awakened the three-dotted Sharingan as all the emotions that were deeply concealed with his condescending and proud mannerism were unleashed and fulfilled.
Yet the prank continues —-
Kakashi, the self-proclaimed master of the ninja world, suddenly found himself ensnared in a bizarre illusion that felt like it had been lifted straight from a bad dream. Of course it was caste by Miblade himself trying his Sharigan to his brother.
In Kakashi senses, Everything had been going swimmingly until bedtime with some Hyuga girl, the sweet moment shattered when he lifted his blanket only to discover it was completely soiled!
“Whoa! What is this?!” he exclaimed, nearly leaping out of his skin like a cat that just stumbled into a bathtub filled with cold water. The sheer shock jolted him awake, and he blinked rapidly, trying to make sense of the nightmarish scene unfolding before him.
Scared out of his wits, Kakashi burst out of the illusion faster than a ninja dodging a shuriken, his heart racing like he had just faced off against the entire Akatsuki single-handedly.
If Mi Blade didn't withdraw his illusion towards his brother, Kakashi’s psyche would have shattered like a glass vase in a toddler’s hands—imagine the horror of realizing he’d just been hit with the ultimate ninja nightmare!
From the sidelines, the White Snake Immortal observed with gleeful delight as the two siblings stumbled out of the illusion, nodding in satisfaction like a proud teacher finally witnessing her students grasping the concept of algebra for the first time.
“Let’s go; we need to meet these two little geniuses,” she announced, her voice dripping with amusement, as if she were ready to unveil the final surprise at a magic show.
Her eyes sparkled with the thrill of what was to come, as the atmosphere around them buzzed with excitement.
Deep within the Ryuchi Cave, Mi Blade and Kakashi found themselves standing before the legendary White Snake Immortal, the air thick with an electric anticipation—or perhaps it was just the smell of adventure mingled with the faint odor of something questionable (definitely not the ramen they had left behind).
Orochimaru eyed his two disciples with a smug grin, reminiscent of a parent watching their kids at a graduation ceremony, ready to toss the caps in the air.
The flickering torchlight cast dramatic shadows across his face, accentuating his triumphant expression.
“Congratulations, you have passed the Ryuchi Cave test!” he declared, puffing out his chest like a proud rooster, the corners of his mouth turning up in a sly smile.
Mi Blade beamed widely, practically vibrating with excitement.
“I didn’t embarrass you, did I? I mean, I totally crushed it!” he boasted, flexing like a ninja bodybuilder showing off his muscles, each bicep exaggeratedly taut under the dim light.
“Ha! Not even close,” Orochimaru chuckled, shaking his head as if trying to dislodge a particularly stubborn popcorn kernel stuck in his throat.
“This is the White Snake Immortal,” he said, gesturing dramatically as if introducing the headliner at a rock concert, his hand sweeping through the air with flair.
Mi Blade and Kakashi, now hyped up and slightly awkward, executed a bow that resembled a clumsy rendition of a school play more than a respectful gesture of gratitude.
“Thank you for taking care of us, White Snake Fairy!” they exclaimed in unison, their voices harmonizing in a way that would make even the most patient teacher cringe, the sincerity of their words contrasting with their awkward delivery.
The White Snake Immortal took the compliment like a champ, puffing out her chest as if she’d just been crowned queen at a beauty pageant. The wrinkles around her eyes crinkled with delight, reflecting her pleasure in their praise.
“Yes, yes! Treating this simple test as a personal achievement is all part of my charm,” she thought to herself, basking in the moment. After all, what better way to preserve her dignity than by pretending that the kids had somehow conquered a monumental challenge?
“Otherwise, the Ryuchi Cave test would’ve been a total joke!” she mused, her mind racing with the implications of what that would mean for her reputation.
“Can’t have these little rascals breezing through and making me the laughingstock of the snake community, can we?”
With a dramatic flourish, she transformed from a large white snake into an old woman, her kind eyes crinkling with the weight of her wisdom—or perhaps it was just the strain of ancient back pain. The transformation was mesmerizing, the shimmer of magic swirling around her like a gentle breeze.
“It’s fine,” she said, her voice warm and inviting, like a favorite grandmother calling everyone in for cookies.
“I also saw Orochimaru’s face during the test. Congratulations! You have both passed the Ryuchi Cave test!” Her eyes sparkled with a hint of mischief, as if she knew secrets beyond their understanding.
Kakashi and Mi Blade exchanged glances, wondering if she was referring to Orochimaru’s face as the kind only a mother could love or if she meant something more profound.
Either way, they felt their status had been elevated from “awkward kids” to “somewhat impressive little ninjas.”
“Thank you, Lord Orochimaru!” they chimed, channeling their inner choir boys, hoping for a standing ovation as the echo of their voices bounced off the cave walls.
“Ha! You’re welcome,” Orochimaru chuckled, feeling like a proud parent at a school play.
“If I had a ryo for every time I’d seen those faces, I’d be richer than the Hokage!” His laughter filled the air, warm and full of encouragement.
The White Snake Immortal continued, her tone shifting to that of a wise sage, her voice growing serious.
“Though you’ve passed the Ryuchi Cave test, if you want to sign a psychic contract with us, you’ll need the approval of the giant psychic snake.” Her words hung in the air, charged with a weighty promise of what lay ahead.
Just as she finished speaking, a horde of large, venomous snakes slithered into view like an uninvited family reunion at a barbecue.
They were colorful and had mouths big enough to swallow a whole cow—or maybe just a few questionable snacks that had been left out too long, the gleam in their eyes hinting at their hungry curiosity.
“Uh, are they supposed to look this hungry?” Mi Blade whispered to Kakashi, who could only shrug in response, his face reflecting a mix of awe and sheer terror as he eyed the writhing mass of serpents before them.
“Are these two little ghosts?” hissed a giant red snake, squinting at Mi Blade and Kakashi as if trying to decide whether they were worth the trouble or just some particularly stubborn flies.
“I fear they don’t even count as snacks!” chimed in a giant white snake, its tone dripping with sarcasm, as if the very idea of these two being potential meals was an insult to its refined palate. The sneering judgment in its voice was enough to make Kakashi wince.
“Great, they’re judging us now,” Kakashi muttered under his breath, casting a sidelong glance at Mi Blade.
“What’s next? A snake talent show? Because I didn’t bring my tap shoes.” His dry humor brought a flicker of amusement to the tension surrounding them.
The White Snake Immortal waved her hand dismissively, as if shooing away a particularly annoying fly.
“Well, they have passed the Ryuchi Cave test. Is there anyone among you who wants to sign a psychic contract with them?” Her tone carried a hint of urgency, and her gaze flicked from one snake to another, searching for volunteers.
The snakes exchanged dubious glances, each one more skeptical than the last, their beady eyes narrowing as they deliberated.
Orochimaru raised an eyebrow, thinking to himself, “These long worms are more cautious than my pet goldfish, and that thing has zero street smarts!” He could practically hear the giant snakes whispering among themselves,
“Are we seriously going to let these kids sign contracts? I mean, do they even know what they’re getting into? They could be signing up for a lifetime supply of snake-themed t-shirts!”
The White Snake slithered around, confused and annoyed, as Mi Blade casually perched on top of its head like a kid who’d just discovered a new jungle gym.
The scales beneath him shimmered with an iridescent glow, creating a mesmerizing pattern as the snake shifted. On the other side, Kakashi climbed atop the red snake’s head with all the grace of a seasoned acrobat, though with the enthusiasm of a toddler on a sugar rush.
The giant snakes swayed beneath them, their immense bodies coiling and uncoiling as they assessed the peculiar situation unfolding before them.