Chapter 20 - Visit to the Ninja Academy
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“Guy, what is going on with you?!” Asuma shouted, genuinely concerned as he watched his friend standing there, weeping uncontrollably.
“You were literally kicking their butts a minute ago! Why are you suddenly acting like some soap opera character?”
In the middle of the chaos, Mighty Guy stood tall, tears flowing down his face like a river. It was as though someone had just told him that his favorite set of training weights had been discontinued.
“I did it! I’ve finally proven it! Ninjas with physical strength are just as good—no, even better—than ninjas who rely on fancy jutsu!”
The group of onlookers stared, half in disbelief, half embarrassed. Mi Blade rubbed his face in frustration, muttering, “Not again…”
Completely caught up in his emotional triumph, Mighty Guy raised his voice louder, hitting a peak that could rival any drama series.
“For years, people told me physical ninjas were useless! While you were all busy learning ninjutsu, I was running laps around the village! Doing push-ups during lunch! Squats at recess! Jumping jacks while eating ramen!”
With every proclamation, his tears only intensified. “But now, I’ve beaten Kakashi and Mi Blade in front of everyone! I’m... I’m a real ninja!”
The crowd just stared, unsure whether to be moved by his emotional speech or cringing at the sheer spectacle of it all. Despite his victorious stance, Guy’s face was red and blotchy from crying, looking more like someone who’d tangled with a beehive than a proud champion.
Still trapped beneath the pile of classmates, Kakashi groaned. “Great, I’ve been taken down by the guy who cries like a leaky faucet. Can someone grab him a tissue?”
Asuma tried to stifle his laughter. “Mighty Guy, could you maybe... tone it down for a sec? We kind of need to finish the fight.”
But Guy was in no state to stop. “No! This is the greatest moment of my life! Woo-hoo-hoo!”
At this point, the battle had devolved into a bizarre mix of a ninja skirmish and a group therapy session. Guy’s loud wails echoed through the trees, blending with everyone’s sweat, exhaustion, and confusion. The absurdity of the moment was such that even the birds in the nearby forest likely paused, wondering whether to laugh or cry with him.
Meanwhile, Guy was still wiping his tears with his sleeve, resembling a child who had lost his favorite toy. His emotional display was so intense that even Asuma and Obito, caught up in their scuffle, noticed something was wrong. They turned to find that the Mi Blade and Kakashi they had been grappling were, in fact, logs of wood.
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“When did they...?” Asuma gasped, realization dawning. “They used the replacement jutsu?!”
From the bushes, Mi Blade emerged, looking smug as he dusted off his clothes. “Thanks for the distraction, Guy! I’ll treat you to ramen later!”
Kakashi nodded coolly, still composed despite the earlier chaos. “Yeah, thanks for the tears, Guy. Without your emotional outburst, we’d still be stuck under that pile of bodies.”
Guy gave a dramatic thumbs-up, puffing out his chest like a hero fresh from battle. “It’s my duty as a friend!” he declared proudly.
Asuma sighed, rubbing his temples. “Cried so hard, he became a tactical distraction. Unbelievable.” He could already feel the headache setting in.
Obito, his moment of revenge ruined, sighed heavily. “I had one chance… and I blew it.”
Mi Blade and Kakashi, faces red with effort and sporting matching grins, cracked their knuckles in unison. The tension in the air thickened as they both took slow, deliberate steps toward their targets.
“Uchiha... Obito...” Mi Blade’s voice was full of menace.
“Sarutobi... Asuma...” Kakashi’s Sharingan glinted ominously.
Asuma’s face paled as he desperately looked for a way out. “W-wait, guys! Can’t we talk this out? Let’s be reasonable!”
Obito, already drenched in sweat, nervously grinned at Kakashi. “Hey, buddy! Remember those meatballs I bought you? We’re best friends, right?” His laughter was shaky, teetering on the edge of hysteria.
Kakashi’s eye twitched. “We’ll settle this... with meatballs of a different kind.”
Mi Blade was already forming hand seals, a dangerous glint in his eyes. “A thousand years of...”
Obito’s eyes went wide in panic. “No, wait! Don’t—”
“KILL!”
The high-pitched screams of Asuma and Obito echoed through the clearing as the infamous ninja technique was executed once more. Everyone froze in horror at the terrifying efficiency of the attack.
“Why do they always use that disgusting move?!” Asuma groaned in defeat, sinking to the ground.
Obito, face down in the dirt, whimpered, “Why do I keep falling for it?”
And so, the students of Konoha learned an important lesson: never let your guard down around Kakashi and Mi Blade, unless you enjoy surprise rear-end attacks that leave you humiliated and wondering where you went wrong.
The onlookers erupted into laughter, filling the training grounds with the sound of their shared amusement. Despite the bruises, scrapes, and emotional scars, they all glanced at each other, a bond forged in the chaos of the day. If nothing else, they would never forget this bizarre yet unforgettable battle.
Kakashi finally managed to stand, his body sore from the ordeal.
“I can’t believe this is what our class considers bonding,” he muttered, rubbing his back. He tried to maintain a serious expression, but the grin on his face betrayed him.
Mi Blade, still catching his breath, chuckled. “Chaotic? Yes. Fun? Definitely. But maybe next time, let’s have fewer surprise attacks.”
Asuma, still walking awkwardly from the ninja wedgie, added, “Yeah, maybe a rematch wouldn’t be so bad. I’ll be ready next time.” He struck a pose that was supposed to be confident but looked more like he was fending off imaginary ninjas.
Obito, still brushing dirt off his face, joined in enthusiastically. “And next time, let’s have food! And no more of that technique, please!”
The group all agreed as they limped back to their everyday lives, laughing and sharing their plans for their next adventure.
Later that evening, after the chaos had settled, Kakashi and Mi Blade decided to treat Guy to ramen. After all, they owed him for saving them from that mess with his dramatic waterworks.
As they sat at the ramen shop, enjoying their food, Mighty Guy declared, “Next time, let’s have a full-on competition! No holding back!”
Kakashi, sipping his broth, gave him a tired look. “I think I’ve had enough competition for a while, thanks.”
Mi Blade laughed. “Yeah, let’s keep it a bit more low-key next time, maybe?”
The three of them shared a peaceful, laughter-filled night, content in the knowledged That despite the bruises and chaos, they’d made memories that would last a lifetime.