CHAPTER 266

The weather started turning for the worse at around five hours into our trip, forcing us to find a place to land and settle in for the evening faster than we would have, and that was difficult considering how dark it was. We were still over route 212, although we'd swung north in order not to get caught in the swamp. My clothes were soaked, and I shivered as Princess dipped down to get lower to the ground.

It would take three days to reach Twinleaf by flight in total now that we didn't have to slow ourselves down because of Chase's Sigilyph. I'd have to cross half of route 212, then over Mount Coronet and a large stretch of wilderness until I reached Oreburgh. The stop in that city was necessary if I didn't want to have to camp off-route, and my run-in with Carnivine had taught me better, especially considering that the area I would have needed to stop at would have been crawling with Pokemon even stronger due to its isolation from any route. Then, it would be a straight flight to Twinleaf. Still, I couldn't help but smile when thinking of her. She'd been overwhelmed with relief when I brought Leafeon back to her and had apologized for breaking my ankle. It hadn't been on her, really. It had been my fault for putting my nose where it didn't belong and thinking I'd grown invincible after my victory with Volkner, and if we hadn't crossed paths, then I never would have known about Leafeon.

The fact that traversing Sinnoh would now be this simple was still exhilarating, especially when I knew that Princess would always be able to go faster. Craig's Salamence had been much quicker than this, although the type of saddle I had wouldn't really allow her to go that fast without hurting my back.

"Let's get your brother out of his ball," I said as thunder boomed.

The fairy type snickered, and I knew it was because Buddy was very loose on the sibling thing, even more so than Sunshine was. I released Jellicent as we hovered around a hundred feet in the air, and he seemed to relish in the rain. His head swelled slightly, and his eyes shone brighter than usual.

"No need to show off that much," I teased. The water type rolled his eyes. "Can you find us a good spot to camp in? We can't see crap in this weather."

A gust of wind slammed against my face, causing me to groan and hurriedly grip my saddle. Jellicent's eyes scanned our surroundings for a minute until he moved one tentacle toward us— no, he was pointing backward. There were small hills there that marked the border between the swamp and the rest of the route, he explained. He was much slower than Princess, but he guided us there until we reached a small alcove barely deep enough to keep us dry. I released Angel, who carefully placed me back on the ground and handed me a crutch to lean against. Princess was so soaked that her fur clung to her skin just like it had during the battle against Wake, and she looked very displeased.

"Let's hope this lets up at some point," I muttered as I leaned forward to look at the cloudy sky.

Buddy was still out in the rain, having transformed into a puddle with two glowing red eyes by himself. There wasn't much space to release the entire team, but I decided to do so anyway, at least for a few minutes so we could speak except for Sweetheart, who was currently sleeping, and would for most hours of the day. The final molt required a lot of energy, and she'd be resting a lot more than usual.

Sunshine shot me an indignant look as soon as he materialized. Oh, yes, how dare I release him when it was raining. I just stuck out my tongue and motioned at him to get close so I could dry my clothes. I was not going to sleep with wet clothes. The last thing I wanted was to get sick. A comfortable warmth spread throughout the cave as I quickly changed and laid my clothes on a towel so they could dry. Once Electivire helped change the bandages for the cut on my arm, we could finally relax. Angel was busy playing in the rain and spraying Honey with more water until Turtonator told them to quit it because they were getting the inside of the alcove wet. Mudsdale, meanwhile, was the one taking the most space in the small cave due to his massive height and size. Even when lying down, his head was still poking out of the alcove. The ground type simply snorted as he watched my Pokemon shuffle away from each other awkwardly.

"Honey, tell me if the rain gets annoying, alright? I'll recall you," I said. The electric type simply shook his head and moved on to speak to Buddy instead, so I turned back to Mudsdale. "We were in a place just like this up north, once," I recounted as I settled deeper into the cave. Arceus, I was going to have to eat granola bars for dinner. "It was a lot larger than this, though. A lot of Pokemon came in and joined us…"

Part of me had dreaded this. Being alone, traveling to Twinleaf without any of my issues with my friends having been resolved, but I couldn't deny that it felt much better being here than in the city. Staying in Pastoria any longer not only would have screwed up my timeline to get Sweetheart to evolve near Lake Verity, but it also made me feel like I was choking. At least, my team didn't treat me any differently. They were, however, still worried about me, because they knew something wasn't right. Mudsdale didn't know me enough to guess, but I hadn't been behaving right since the raid.

I knew Denzel had told everyone about Backlot with good intentions, that he only wanted what was best for me, and it had helped somewhat. My friends and I had gone from barely talking about normal things at all to at least doing so again, but the fact that they knew that I'd watched Backlot die left a bad taste in my mouth. It wasn't so much the fact that I'd done so that bothered me, but the fact that I'd be judged for it, and judge they had. Every time they stared when they thought I wasn't looking, there was a tint of discomfort.

The way I behaved wasn't normal. I knew that, now, and I'd known all along. Why else would I have wanted to hide Edward Backlot's fate, or hide the way I'd hurt Maylene's Infernape to draw out his suffering? Now I had to deal with the consequences of my actions and watch my friends stare at me like I was some kind of monster. I still love you, Pauline had said, yet beforehand, that 'still' never would have needed to be there. And if Cecilia found out…

She'd known the way Backlot had passed, but she hadn't known Mira and I had stayed to watch. After telling the story of how I'd met Bella to Mudsdale, I grabbed my phone and scrolled through my camera roll, enlarging some goofy picture I'd taken of Cecilia when she'd been blinking. A small smile stretched across my lips as I leaned against Sunshine's scales. The dragon was already asleep. For all he hated the rain, he found its sound easy to fall asleep to. He'd wake up hungry tomorrow.

Togekiss called out to me, and my eyes drifted up from my phone.

"It's just a picture," I said. "I can't even text her, there's no signal on this route."

Princess grunted, saying I shouldn't be looking at her picture like a 'lost child'. It wasn't the first time she'd felt like this, I knew, but it was the first time she'd said something about it. I bit down a snappy answer and only mustered a nod. She was right, and she was more mature about this than I was. Mudsdale looked quite confused, but opted to stay out of any potential arguments.

I smiled sadly. "Sorry. I guess you're right," I said before pausing. "You hungry?"

The fairy type nodded, and I caressed her cheek before painfully standing up.

"Today's just going to be kibble. I'm way too tired to cook anything, and the weather's bumming me out," I said, staring off into the distance. It was mostly woods with short trees and hills, along with a few outlined paths through them. In this weather, we weren't going to see any trainers passing through, and I preferred it that way. I'd started disliking any interaction I had with those ever since the raid, for obvious reasons.

I fed the entire team, although Angel would make do with sunlight tomorrow and Mudsdale told me he preferred to graze.

"Graze? Like, normal grass?" I asked.

The horse neighed in affirmation, adding the fact that his favorite type of grass was somewhat muddy, after rainy days like this one.

"Well, that's why you didn't look bothered by the rain at all," I snorted.

It was a quiet night, really. Mudsdale ended up reneging his spot and sleeping in his Pokeball to allow the others to have some space. Honey did some fancy light tricks with short bursts of electricity through his fingers, lighting up the cave with a soft glow. Angel's entire body was soaked with water as he sank and dripped against the stone. Princess quietly molded a super long and complicated spear with Ancient Power.

Did she have to put spikes on it? I bet she'll ask me to carry it around for a few days too, I mused. I ended up staying up later than the entire team, save for Jellicent, of course, but he was basically checked out in the rain. Now that we'd made it past the swamp, the route was safe once more, so he didn't have to be alert at all times, and most Pokemon here would be too scared to approach anyway.

I scrolled through my camera roll until I fell asleep in my sleeping bag.

I couldn't stop myself.

—

The next day, the sky finally cleared up. I let Mudsdale and Sunshine eat breakfast before we left. I made the ground type nearly choke when I asked if Sunshine was going to eat grass too.

"What? I was just wondering," I said with a teasing smile. Turtonator's eye twitched, and he said that if I wasn't already wounded he'd sweep my legs with his tail. "No, you wouldn't," I said. "You'd feel terrible after. You would have blown smoke into my face or something, but you've softened up so much that you won't even do that."

Unfortunately, he didn't prove me wrong. Did he feel that bad for me? I asked myself. Still, I shuffled across the wet grass when we were done and got on Princess' back once more. There had been a lot of rain yesterday, and parts of the route were so flooded I could see teams of Rangers attending to the flooded paths with water types. The swamp was probably even worse, though I doubted they'd do anything about it there. Now that it was daytime again, Mount Coronet loomed tall in the distance. Even though this part of it was nowhere as tall as the peak, it still dwarfed any other mountains in Sinnoh. Once, I had described the entire mountain as if someone had grabbed the earth and pinched it up. The slopes at Mount Coronet's base were not gradual, they were a sharp rise that I'd never seen on any other mountain or hill. Below me, vast expanses of trees stretched for miles and miles. Princess chirped softly as she sped up, and I felt a little kick. Every time she got anywhere close to the mountain, she got uneasy.

"Don't worry. It's not like we're landing on it, we're just flying over," I said.

And we had planned each stop specifically to avoid having to rest on the mountain. People like Craig and Aubri trained there, so there was no way in hell I was ever going to approach that place. I'd gone through too much to already be dropped into a life-and-death fight. I just wanted to relax for the time being and prepare for the inevitable confrontation with that ancient Zoroark. Aubri Schneider going through my mind made me think of my fellow Poketch sponsees I'd met in Sunyshore for that photoshoot. Ramon and Bobby had actually contacted me after the raid and been rather nice about it, along with offering a warning. Their own liaisons— so their equivalent of Melody— were coming after me and undermining my position.

The fact that I'd killed someone during the raid was public now, and no matter what I did, people would now see a murderer when they looked at me even if they were 'nice' about it, or as nice as someone could be. Craig himself had been shaken when his Salamence had killed those Team Galactic grunts near Lake Acuity all those months ago, so I could tell that having killed someone was abnormal in our line of work unless you worked for the League, and they wanted to use that and my other tendencies to push me out of the company. Melody had soothed my worries and said that the board was still on board with me, but I couldn't help but feel somewhat anxious. I needed to be on my best behavior for when I could negotiate my next raise.

What had they wanted me to do, even? Let myself get mentally assaulted by Musharna until Slowking's mental shield broke? It was self-defense.

No use thinking about it when the biggest goal of this trip was to decouple from the public and relax. I spoke to Princess about everything until we made it to Mount Coronet. She was growing up quickly, and so I could confide in her now when I hadn't been able to just months ago. Granted, most of her advice had to do with violence, so it wasn't applicable there, but it felt good to talk to someone about it.

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Everyone at the raid would have to deal with these rumors too, although Denzel had 'only' killed a Graveler, and for some reason people didn't care as much when Pokemon died instead of humans. I knew Chase wouldn't care and Mira was preoccupied with other stuff, but I hoped Cecilia was dealing well with the new way people would look at her, now, and that it wouldn't close any doors with sponsors in Unova. I needed to stop thinking about her, but worrying for her was fine, probably.

It was my first time flying over Mount Coronet. Craig's Salamence had gone around it, and the sight was as breathtaking as it was terrifying. The mountain's presence was no less menacing in broad daylight, casting long, eerie shadows that seemed to stretch endlessly over the desolate landscape. The air seemed to grow colder here, and thinner too. I shivered as we started our flight above the passes. High above them, of course. The last thing I wanted was to get attacked by some wild Pokemon that got angry we got too close to its territory. There were pockets of life, on the mountain. There were ledges full of vegetation that looked small from up there, but that were as big as a city or close to it. Pokemon could go their entire lives knowing only that ledge. There were of course, many rivers. All of Sinnoh's rivers originated from Mount Coronet, although they became waterfalls by the time they reached the ground. Up here, though, the slope was gentle enough to allow the water to roll through the numerous valleys. At the peak of these ridges were snowcaps, even during the spring, although I knew they melted in summer. The taller sections of the mountain saw snow and hail all year long, however.

"Craig's somewhere down there right now," I said absent-mindedly as I leaned to get a better look at the ground. "Or maybe he's closer to the peak. I hope he's fine."

Mount Coronet wasn't the only pretty sight, although it was the only one that unsettled me. To my west was the vast ocean— or it was a sea, I supposed. It separated Sinnoh from the rest of Shinwa, where Kanto, Johto, and Hoenn sat. I drummed my fingers against my saddle as Princess soared even higher and I caught a glimpse of the mountain's peak high above the clouds. It was blurry, shifted blue due to how far away it was, and it was so blurry I couldn't make out anything. It was said that Mount Coronet was so tall people needed oxygen to make it that high, and no one had even been at the peak.

That was probably a lie. There was no way the League hadn't sent someone up there. Bellatrix had been terrified of the entire mountain when she'd described it to me, so she knew more about it than she let on too.

Well, I wasn't going to poke the Bewear. It took us hours to make it past Mount Coronet, but we made it through with no incidents save for a Braviary that hadn't liked how close we got— even though we were very far away from the slopes. Thankfully, he had just let us off with a warning, which had been a gust of wind so powerful it would have knocked me off Princess had I not been strapped into a saddle. The scars that had marred his body were signs that he'd been in quite a few scraps and I was not confident in winning an aerial battle, so we just high-tailed it out of there. I didn't know how to gauge Braviary's strength, but he was probably strong enough to take at least Princess down alone, although I was sure she'd leave him very hurt by the end of it. They had to be this strong, to live at those heights.

We reached Oreburgh during the evening, and seeing the city again was like a breath of nostalgia. And fumes. Horrible, toxic fumes. I covered my nose until Princess landed in the industrialized city at the Pokemon Center near the Gym. She was tired after having flown all day, so I recalled her and promised I would let her sleep on the bed tonight with me. Everything had started here. My first battle against Roark that I had almost lost and only won thanks to Princess' pivotal evolution. Memories flashed in my mind. I'd been a sweaty, stumbling mess by the end of that battle, but it had taught me the heights of what victory tasted like, and I'd grown addicted to that feeling.

"A room for one night, please," I told the Nurse Joy.

The stares at my back were prickly, like they hadn't expected me to be here already. I supposed I hadn't really told anyone where I was going, so seeing me pop up in Oreburgh was probably surprising. The whispers were annoying too, especially when they were loud enough to hear. Theories about what had gone on in the mansion were rampant, and most of the ones regarding me had to do with stabbing things.

I grabbed my keycard, and I would have gone to see the city had I not been so exhausted.

"He—hello," a voice rang out behind me.

It was a kid, just like Erin. Doe-eyed and excited to meet me. I was surprised to see a Togepi in her arms, although this one was a male. He retreated into his shell when my stare lingered for more than a second, and the girl's legs shook. Right, I was a murderer. Erin hadn't texted as much since the raid. It was different, now. I blinked and softened my gaze.

"How can I help you?" I smiled.

"Um, my name is Sophie. I was wondering if you had tips to train a Togepi? He hatched from an egg recently, so…"

"Aw. Does he have a name?"

"Not yet. Uh, I usually try to watch your battles, but you were a lot better than he was when you fought Roark. I don't know how to train him from scratch."

The Togepi let out an embarrassed chirp, and I softly chuckled. He was a lot shier than Princess had been as a baby.

"People don't really know how you got your start," she continued, growing a little more confident. "Your battle with Roark was shaky— I'm not saying that, other people are!" she yelled. "But then against Gardenia, you started showing your skill. I want to get better."

Right. No one knew my first battle had been against a kid with a Shinx, or that I'd gotten my start by having Princess practice Rollout in dad's apartment. I wondered how that dude with Shinx was doing these days. I was usually good with names, but I'd forgotten his.

"Well, I won't be staying here long, but I can give you some pointers," I said. "How's his Rollout like?"

—

She hadn't stayed long, and I hadn't expected her to. I had somewhat overwhelmed her with all of the potential techniques a Togepi could have and that I had missed out on because I hadn't been good enough to think about them, and I hoped she'd put them to good use. Before I left, though, there was a special place I wanted to go to. Oreburgh hadn't changed at all, really, and it might have been foolish to expect a city to drastically change in a few months. The richest people lived on its outskirts, away from the pollution from the mines, while the poorest lived close to them. I rode Mudsdale through the sidewalks until we reached a particular poffin house.

"It really looks the same," I muttered. In retrospect, these were nowhere as good as the ones in Hearthome, but Buddy and Princess had loved them when we'd come here and they had first started growing closer.

I bought the team ten packs of poffins, all with different flavors, and decided to go eat it on the city's outskirts up north on route 207, where I used to train.

"You ever had poffins, Mudsdale?" I asked with a hand on his neck. He was always gentle with he walked so he wouldn't hurt my ankle.

The ground type answered with a resounding no, which surprised me until I remembered that Sunshine hadn't had any either and that this needed to be remedied immediately. I released my entire team, but only Togekiss and Jellicent recognized this place. The stony ground with the few shrubs that grew few and far in between and the tall mountain that led to the rest of route 207 that could only be scaled or flown over. I handed out the poffins to them, although I kept the Oran ones for Princess and the Mago ones for Buddy. Sweetheart was awake now, although she was struggling to keep her eyes open and we all looked at her warily. Should she evolve early, I would recall her in her Pokeball immediately and keep her there until we reached Lake Verity. Angel had forgone food to keep a close eye on her. She was taller than he was, now, but his vines still soothed her wherever they touched.

"Hear me out," I said, turning to Sunshine, who was pretending not to like his poffins. "Buddy used not to listen to me."

The dragon snorted, and Honey's tails twitched curiously.

"I'm serious. I'd call out for a Water Pulse and he'd use a Night Shade. Back then, our Night Shades weren't really that great. Anyway, it was because I messed up when I caught him, but still, can you imagine it?"

The ghost glared at me for exposing him, but unfortunately for him, I was the one with the Mago Berries and he didn't exactly have the means to grab them unless he absorbed the entire thing into his head. It was still odd, to see the food dissolve directly in there. Turtonator jokingly called Jellicent a lackey, after which he sprayed him with water and ruined the poffin he carried.

Princess chimed in and said that Sunshine was just as much of a lackey as Buddy was, and there was an amused glint in Mudsdale's eye. He enjoyed seeing the dragon be teased, as Lurantis and Oranguru had done in the past.

"You're not lackeys," I said. "You're family, which is why you call me out when I do something wrong, or at least try to. I, uh, I want to talk to you guys about something."

The air grew serious, and I bit my lip, chasing away the regret I felt for having ruined the nice mood. There were no trainers in sight, and even if there were, Princess would be able to sense them. At this time of the year, most trainers had left Oreburgh, either due to winning against Roark or just giving up on him and returning to Jubilife or Canalave. Oreburgh wasn't as large as Sunyshore, and so had a lower trainer population save for the rush here early in the Circuit.

"As it stands, I still don't think I did anything wrong," I quietly said. "That's not the way a normal person should think, or at least I think so. Watching Backlot pay his due was right," I stopped, letting silence fill the air. "But it also wasn't. I need— I need a conscience, or something akin to it. Someone to tell me when I might be going too far. Because I know most of you don't care about my friends, but I do, and I don't want them to think I'm too far gone."

Immediately, I could tell what each member of the team thought with a glimpse. Sunshine's eyes narrowed, like he was saying don't even think about it. Sweetheart softly muttered something under her breath, but I let her know that she could keep sleeping now that she'd eaten. Jellicent just couldn't comprehend human morality and why people had made such a fuss about the entire situation in the first place, so he was the wrong person to ask. For Princess, justice had been served, and it was well-deserved.

So it fell upon Angel and Honey.

"It's… hard to explain exactly what I'm asking, but basically, just try to let me know if the ideas I'm suggesting to take down any future criminals are terrible."

Both agreed, although Honey was a lot happier about it. Tangrowth patted me on the head and nodded with a gentle stare. Arceus, how worried about me had they been? I thanked them with a smile and we returned to eating poffins in peace. I scrolled through multiple texts that my friends had sent me to check on me, and I noticed Princess and Buddy eyeing my screen from afar.

"They're just texts," I said. "Not to Cece. I'm giving her space." I turned to the fairy type. "Also, when did you tell Buddy about this?"

The fact that I was so fucked up I couldn't even go a day without thinking about Cecilia.

Togekiss answered with last night, when I'd fallen asleep, and they'd been the only two in the room. I thought the little rascal would have been asleep, with all of the flying she did. Unfortunately, they hadn't been able to stop me from reading Cece and I's old texts, and maybe expecting a 'hello' or something. I knew she was fine, because she'd texted the group chat about being in Jubilife. Had someone told her that I'd watched Edward Backlot get tortured? Maybe that was why she didn't want to communicate. No, no, I was growing too paranoid. My friends wouldn't do that to me, they wouldn't tell her. Denzel had told me that he wouldn't and that he'd told the others to stay quiet when I asked, but I started typing a message to him about it to make sure. I erased it before I could send it. I needed to stop. I needed to, but I couldn't. I glanced back down at my phone and replied to all of them with news I'd made it to Oreburgh, although with how fast news traveled about us these days, they had already all known about it.

Mira was in Hearthome now, although she was rather quiet. I hoped her lessons with Fantina were going well. She'd been there, when we watched Backlot die, but she'd been a lot more squeamish about it than I had. Still, she had stayed the entire way through, and as it stood, she was the only person who wouldn't judge me for it. Was she dealing with the same bullshit that I was? She probably was, which might be why she left Pastoria so quickly.

Soon after that, Princess and I were back in the air.

—

I was almost tempted to get back to Jubilife on the way to Twinleaf, but I decided against it. One, the city had way too many people, which meant that since the raid was still being talked about a lot, there was no way I'd be able to avoid attention like I'd done in Pastoria and Oreburgh. The desire to see dad was strong, but I would rather have waited longer for the news to die down— well, die down was probably too big of a hope, but at least I'd have peace for a while in Twinleaf, along with that therapist.

There was the desire to see someone else too, but Princess never would have agreed anyway.

We cut across the southwest and flew over Sandgem. I decided to let Princess stop here for a few minutes so Buddy could see the ocean he'd lived in for centuries. Coincidentally, this was also the beach where Mudsdale, Sunshine, Kamaile and the others had spent an entire afternoon when they had just come in Sinnoh, and the ground type enjoyed telling me how Turtonator had threatened to glass it on multiple occasions after Lurantis had annoyed him. The fire type still hated calling this place a beach. Eventually I broke away from the two and walked toward Jellicent, who watched the wave with a strange look in his eye.

"You doing okay?" I hesitantly asked. I couldn't get too close, because otherwise my cast would get wet.

The ghost turned back toward me and said that until I had caught him, he hadn't been alive. Not truly, anyway. Drifting across the sea, going from prey to prey until something would hopefully be strong enough to kill him. For more than two centuries, he lived here, but it was only until he'd met me that he learned to make living enjoyable again. He floated toward me and let his face brush against my arm. I turned to caress his cheek, and his eyes dimmed.

He loved me, and he had no regrets.

—

Just like planned, three days after our departure from Pastoria, we'd made it to Twinleaf. It looked smaller from up here. Surrounding the town itself were picturesque fields and meadows. The rich, earthy tones of the countryside were dotted with wildflowers and tall grass, and beyond those were the usual woods that dotted much of Sinnoh. A meandering river cut through the town until it reached the southern lake, where a few people were currently fishing, probably for Magikarp. They ate those here, I knew. Like Pastoria, there was no grid to be seen. Instead, the streets had been made with no plan in mind, and every single house was designed differently. Some looked small and cozy while others were sprawling. One of them, I recognized, was Denzel's home, a relatively large patisserie that doubled as a house with a picketed fence surrounding much of the land. I spotted more than fifteen Miltank in that pasture. I knew Denzel's mother used their milk to bake her stuff.

But it was not their home I was going to. There were no landing pads in Twinleaf, so I landed directly in front of my mother's home. No therapist to be seen yet, and they'll probably show themselves soon. I hopped off Togekiss, drew in a deep breath to chase away the anxiety and knocked.