Chapter 31 – Bishop Is Two Letters Away from Bishojo

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When I got back at Holiés' house I saw him at the table eating some toasted bread with boiled vegetables on top of it.

I set next to him and took a slice of bread from his plate before saying, “how is she?”

“A bit better. We talked a bit but she went to back to sleep almost immediately.”

I took a bite from the slice of bread with toppings before saying, “I almost forgot,” taking out two gold coins from my storage, “those are for those few days you were with me.”

“Isn't it a bit too much?” He asked, taking the coins.

“Not at all,” I said, before biting the bread again.

He placed the coins on the table in front of the plate and resumed eating his snack. After a couple of slices were gone from the plate he said, “Fortuna...”

“Yes?”

“There is some blood on your right hand.”

“Oh, how careless of me,” I said, before putting a half-eaten slice of bread on the border of the plate to take a piece of cloth out of my storage. I wet the cloth with water magic and cleaned the blood away from my hand before putting it away.

I was about to bite into the bread again when Holiés' mother entered from the back door.

“Lady Fortuna, you're already back from your walk?” She said, putting down a bucket full of milk and a short stool.

“Yes, it was very relaxing,” I said, smiling at her.

“Would you like some ale with your snack?” She asked me.

“If it isn't too much trouble.”

“Oh, no trouble at all,” she said, going to the same old cabinet to fetch a keg.

“Some for me too,” Holiés said.

“What's the magic word?” She said, turning towards him.

Holiés sighed before saying, “please.”

His mother nodded and went back at filling two mugs from the keg as I grinned at Holiés. He rolled his eyes and went back to eating.

When Clementine brought us the two mugs she saw the coins on the table and, wide-eyed asked, “what are these?”

“Holiés' pay,” I said, before bringing a mug to my lips.

“Lady Fortuna, that is way too much.”

I put down the mug after taking a sip and said, “not at all, I practically forced him to come hunt with me after all.”

“It still feels like it is too much,” she said, visibly troubled.

“Then consider it also a way to thank you for your hospitality.”

“But-”

“I will not go back on my decision, madam,” I said, interrupting her.

She was a bit taken aback but said, “sure, if you feel it's the right thing, Lady Fortuna. By the way, how did those few days go?” Trying to change the subject.

I started talking about what happened in Vilfori, some things she had heard already, others were completely new to her, then we talked about the quests, the other villages, the places we saw and practically everything that happened those days Holiés was away from home.

Except my night with the elves, obviously.

As we talked evening came and Clementine decided it was time to start preparing dinner. She went to a small cabinet and took some sausages out of it.

“These were made with the meat of viltusk you brought us. They have a bit of a strong taste but I know a little trick,” she said with a wink, showing the sausages.

She put the sausages on the table before taking a pan with two rings on the sides. She hung the pan to two hooks on one side of the fireplace and went to the same cabinet she took the sausages from to get a small bowl. From the small bowl she took a spoonful of butter and put it inside the pan. As the butter was starting to melt she put the sausages in the pan with it.

I went to sit by the fire as the frying sounds of the sausages and the pungent smell of wild game filled the room.

“Lady Fortuna, you'll get all the food's smell on you like that,” Clementine said to me as she flipped the sausages.

“I can always take a bath later, I like looking at people as they cook, especially if it comes with the warmth of the fire,” I said smiling at her.

“I'm not so good at cooking,” she said, as she took an half a mug of ale from the keg.

“On the contrary, your cooking is delicious.”

“Stop flattering me, I just put what I have at hand together,” she said with a bit of a bashful smile as she poured the ale in the pan after checking the sausages had browned on both sides.

As the ale boiled away in the pan she took the bucket with the milk in it and hung it on a big hook on the other side of the fireplace, before moving away from under it the burning pieces of wood with a long piece of iron, to make sure that the milk didn't get heated up too quickly.

“That speaks even more of your ability,” I said as she flipped the sausages over in the drying up ale.

“Well, thank you.”

After the ale had all evaporated she took the sausages with a large fork one by one and put them in the hot milk.

A case of theft: this story is not rightfully on Amazon; if you spot it, report the violation.

After the sausages were all in the milk she moved the burning wood again under the bucket before adding another piece, then, with a wide an flat iron scoop she took some ashes from the fireplace and put it in the used pan. She took a small canteen she kept next to the fireplace and poured some water into the pan before starting to scrap the hot pan with water and ashes in it with a hard brush.

As the water was starting to make a few bubbles on the bottom of the pan she took the it out of the fireplace, gave it a few more strokes with the brush and emptied its contents in a dirty bowl by the fireplace.

“Holiés, could you cut some bread?” She asked after putting the pan back on the fireplace.

“Yes,” he answered and went to take a knife and a big loaf of bread.

Clementine meanwhile had gone to another cabinet and took a bowl of already boiled vegetables, probably the same that were on the bread of our afternoon snack, and, after putting another spoonful of butter in the pan, she emptied the bowl in the pan.

She placed the slices of bread Holiés had cut on the border of the fireplace and, when everything was ready, she moved the pan and bucket away from the fire.

Soon on the table there were four plates with two sausages each and some vegetables and some toasted bread on a plate in the middle of the table.

The three of us sat each in front of a plate and started eating. The sausage that had filled the room with its pungent taste now was mild, the milk giving it a sweet and fatty taste that added to the natural fat of the meat, on the other hand the ale had given it a tint of bitterness that balanced the sweetness of the milk while the both of them had served the purpose of making the meat tender and ease its strong taste of wild game.

As I was savoring that milky sausage the door of Clarisse's room opened and she walked out of it, a determined look on her face.

She walked up to the table and said, “I'll marry him.”

Clementine jumped up from her chair and went to hug her, saying that she had made the right choice, but Clarisse's gaze was fixed on Holiés, who just looked back at her and nodded, a bitter smile on his face.

“Come, eat, the food is warm,” Clementine said to her, gesturing towards an empty chair with a plate in front of it.

She nodded and went to sit before saying, “Lady Fortuna, may I ask you to be the one to wed us?”

“What a wonderful idea!” Clementine said after she had sat back down at the head of the table.

I looked at Holiés, who ignored my gaze and went back at eating his sausages, then at Clarisse who had an expecting look on her face, before saying, “shouldn't a priest be much better?”

“What are you saying? Being married by a prelate, the hero nonetheless, is obviously a great honor,” Clementine said, happier than I ever saw her.

“Oh, sure, a prelate... wait a second,” I said, before running at the back door and exiting the house.

I fetched the communication crystal that was connected to Raziel from my storage and activated it.

She soon answered with a, “Fortuna! It's so early. Did something happen?”

“Yes, people here are saying that I'm a prelate.”

“That's because you are,” she said as a matter of fact.

“Since when?” I said, almost shouting at the crystal.

“Since you became a noble.”

(Knowledge is so going to make fun of me for this one once I go back.)

I sighed and said, “so... all nobles are also prelates of the church?”

“No, only the head of the house, which usually is a man but... well, you're the only one of your house.”

“Is there anything else I should have known before becoming a noble and a fucking priest!” I said, shouting the last part.

“Fortuna, calm down, it's just a formality. It's not like nobles ever actually act as priests. Nobles always go to a real prelate for functions and a commoner wouldn't ever request a noble to hold a function for them.”

“Yeah, guess what. There is a certain commoner girl who thinks being married by the hero would be a great honor for her family,” I said, anger still in my voice.

“Oh,” was everything she could say.

“Yeah, 'oh'. Now I have to hold her wedding.”

“Well, you just have to take the badge the king gave you, put the rings on it and say a few words. You do have the badge with you, right?”

“Yes,” I took the badge out of the storage, “I have it right... here.”

“Fortuna, what's wrong?”

“I think I broke it.”

“What do you mean, you broke it?” She said, obviously angry.

“Well, it became completely red,” I said, passing the small, round badge on my fingers, the one golden sun with my initials in it now a deep crimson red.

I heard Raziel laughing before she said, “that's because of the blood pact during the war council.”

“No, no. I'm pretty sure it was still golden when I left the council.”

“Well, it usually takes a few days.”

“So... it just becomes red? Why?” I asked, a bit baffled.

“It's to signify you're a non-ringed member of the war council. It gives you the authority of a Major in the military.”

“Raziel...”

“Yes?”

“I think we have communication issues.”

“Well, we wouldn't have 'communication issues' if a certain someone didn't decide sex was a better alternative every time I tried to explain her something important,” she said, in a pissed-off tone.

“Don't say it as if I'm some sort of nymphomaniac.”

“Fortuna, admit it, you kinda are.”

“Ok, fine, maybe a bit.”

“Make it a lot.”

“Aaanyway, about that marriage,” I said, trying to change subject.

“I'll explain it to you later, I have some things to do now.”

“Oh, ok, contact me later then. I love you, Raziel.”

“I love you too, nympho.”

I was about to give her a come back but I felt the connection of the two crystals die out before I could.

(Hasn't she started teasing me a bit too much since a couple of days ago?) I thought to myself as I went back inside.

When I entered I saw the worried looks on Clarisse and Clementine's faces while Holiés was calmly finishing his vegetables with a piece of bread.

“Sorry, I had to do something urgent,” I said, before sitting back down at my chair.

“Is everything alright? I have some herbs for stomachache if you need them,” Clementine said.

“No, thank you, everything is alright. Anyway, Clarisse, I'll be glad to be the one to wed you,” I said, looking at her, which made a reassured smile appear on her face.

We spent the rest of dinner talking about the wedding, mainly because Clementine kept going back at it even when we started talking about something else. Clarisse was obviously nervous about it but she kept her determination.

I went to take a bath after dinner, alone this time, and, once I finished I prepared one for Clarisse and Clementine too.

Having nothing to do after the bath I decided to go on with Holiés' magic manipulation training.

After a bit over an hour since we started the door opened and I saw Clarisse in a simple nightgown for a moment before she shut the door again saying, “I'm sorry.”

I ran to the door and opened it just enough to let my head through and I said, “Clarisse, wait, come here.”

She stopped in the middle of the main room and turned towards me, her face red, before saying, “no, please, I don't want to interrupt.”

“You're not interrupting, come here.”

She seemed troubled for a moment but, in the end, she decided to enter her brother's room. I moved a bit away from the door and opened it a bit more to let her enter. Once inside she saw her brother sitting cross-legged on the bed with a piece of wood in his hands and his eyes closed.

She looked at me, then Holiés, then back at me before saying, “what are you two doing?”

“She's torturing me,” her brother said.

“Don't listen to him, I'm just training him in magic manipulation,” I said, smiling at her.

“Oh, I understand,” she said, though not really convinced.

“You can stay here while we finish,” I said.

“Is that really fine? It seems like I'd be a bother.”

“No, no, no bother at all,” I said, before taking her by an arm and guiding her to the bed.

I made her sit on the bed in front of Holiés and, after sitting right next to her I said, “right now he has to pour his mana inside that piece of wood until just before it cracks, then retrieve it.”

“Oh, I understand. So, how is it going?” she asked, curious.

“Well, he's almost finished filling it with mana,” I said, the leaning towards her ear I whispered at her, “it's the right moment to distract him if you know a way.”

She blushed a bit at my gesture but nodded and crawled up to her brother's side to pinch him right beneath his armpit. At that moment the piece of wood broke in three pieces in his hands.

“Oh, come on, I was almost there this time. Why did you have to pinch me?” he said, looking at his sister.

“I told her to. You called for it by keeping your eyes closed.”

“But I can't concentrate with my eyes open!” he shouted in frustration.

“That's the whole point of this exercise. You can't start meditating in a corner when a monster is charging at you.”

“Fine, fine,” he said, before taking another piece of wood roughly of the same size as the previous one from the bedside table.

Clarisse sat back next to me and said, “so that's why you're naked.”

“Yeah, but it's losing its effect.”