After many more unsuccessful attempts to alchemy up the magic elixir, Cagliostra eventually piped in again.
If I can make a suggestion?
Please do.
Perhaps your basic approach is incorrect. As soon as you add an element that opposes one already added, they will reject each other.
But that would mean all twelve would have to be added at the same time and I’m not able to do that. I can only add one power at a time.
Perhaps your mastery of the alchemical arts is insufficient.
Damn that Adept limit. But hang on, what if I meld them together before I put them into the potion? Oh, this is gonna hurt.
And hurt it did. The strain of trying to synthesize all twelve powers together almost did me in, and used up most of my remaining mana crystals.
System: Synthesis failed (Critical Failure)
Dammit. And yikes, all twelve of the individual sr one affinity powers is just made and tried to merge together we’re gone. Is that what happens with a critical failure? I gotta be more careful.
It was a noble effort, my friend, but I was right not to hope.
No. There has to be a way.
I thought about a nice juicy burger and poutine. My mana battery was bone dry, and my personal mana was critically low. I was about to pass out at any moment. I needed to eat a lot, and soon. Besides, I always thought better on a full tummy. Don’t ask me how, but the Shoggoth managed to scrounge up authentic cheese curds from somewhere. I kept thinking about food and it kept coming.
How could I get all twelve affinities into the potion at the same time? Maybe if my Alchemy power was higher, but Good At Everything capped it at Adept level. If I didn’t have that limitation...but Good At Everything was what gave me all those affinities, so I needed that. It all hinged on Good At Everything.
Hang on. Could it really be that simple?
As eager as I was to try my idea, I took the time to scarf down enough food to feed a soccer team. I needed the mana.
First, copy Wayne’s second affinity power. Then:
“System, activate Synthesis.”
System: Synthesis ready. Select ability to modify
“Select I Can Make Fire.”
System: Select abilities to combine with I Can Make Fire (Copied)
“Select Good At Everything.”
System: Add another ability?
“Nope.”
System: Synthesis of I Can Make Fire (Copied) and Good At Everything will result in a new power; select name for new synthesized power
“Call it All The Essences Of Existence.”
System: Synthesizing All The Essences Of Existence
System: Synthesis successful
Rock and roll.
Powers:
All The Essences Of Existence - Novice: Affinity with all elements
Well that was easy. It was quite the power, but for me it was really just a redundant ability. Ironic. But at least it was a power I could put into a potion. I hoped. Time to find out.
Back to the alchemy forge.
Before I could even pull the potion out of the forge to see if I was successful, my mana was out. Which meant so was I.
When I became conscious again and opened my eyes, I was greeted by the sight of the little Shoggoth looming over me. Trust me, that is not something you ever want to see. I opened my mouth to scream, but there was something in it. My mouth, that is. The ungodly monster had one of its tentacles jammed into my mouth and it was pumping some kind of thin, bittersweet paste down my throat. Pray you never feel that sensation yourself.
I’d seen the Alien movies far too many times to be remotely comfortable with this situation.
I grabbed the tentacle with both hands and yanked it out. The Shoggoth jism spewed everywhere.
Oh good, you’re awake.
What the hell?
Your mana should be replenished by the Shoggoth’s secretion.
Oh god, please don’t call it that. That makes it sound even worse.
What? It’s just a nutrient-rich secretion. You needed the energy. The Shoggoth can produce all kinds of secretions.
Stop using that word. Please.
Fine. Now can you please see if the alchemy was successful? The suspense has been killing me.
Gee, you’d think that after waiting eons for someone to visit you’d have more patience.
I stood up, carefully avoiding the Shoggoth, which was skittering around hoovering up the sludge that had spilled everywhere with a vacuum-like protrusion. Then I went back to the forge, reached in, and pulled out the vial.
The clear liquid had turned foggy. I tried swirling it around, but it had somehow congealed into a viscous translucent syrup.
You know what? You were right. This is a bit too gloopy to be called a potion. It is more of a compound.
I am the Great Sage. I know some things.
I’ll never doubt you again.
So did it work?
I dunno.
“System, did it work?”
System: Alchemy successful
Rock and roll.
Unbelievable. You really did it.
I told you I could. So now what?
Now’s the easy part. All you have to do is coat the dagger’s blade with the alchemical agent, then kill me with it.
Say what now?
Come on, what else did you think the dagger would be used for? The only way I can fully ascend is if everything shackling me here to the physical realm is ended.
So you want me to stab you in the brain with the dagger?
I can’t really do it myself anymore, now can I?
Fine.
Just be sure to coat it in the compound first.
Goo first, stab second. I think I can remember that.
Don’t worry. I’ve been waiting for this for longer than you can imagine. You will be giving me the greatest boon possible.
If you say so. Any last words?
Only thank you. I’m ready.
Before I lost my nerve, I smashed the dome covering the brain with the hilt of the dagger. Then I poured All The Essences Of Existence over the blade, making sure to cover it completely in the thick glop. Then I unceremoniously plunged the blade deep into the middle of the brain and watched as the pulsing ended and the organ itself withered and shrank, turning a deeper gray, then black, then finally disintegrating along with the dagger into nothingness.
Did it work?
System: Dungeon Quest complete - You have solved the Void Dungeon
This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road. If you spot it on Amazon, please report it.
The Shoggoth trembled and a cluster of tiny tentacles emerged and wiggled in celebration.
I guess it worked.
System: Distributing Quest rewards - Reward Tokens 27 (+25)
System: Transferring Void Dungeon control to Team Player
Well now. That was a lot easier than I expected. The rewards seemed a bit skimpy, though. I mean, I’d gladly take the twenty-five Tokens, I’d used up everything I had on mana potions, but...
System: Bonus Quest Ascension of The Great Sage complete
That sounded promising.
System: Team Player has Control Key: Toronto Transportation Network
A small, flat, rectangular piece of gold the size of a credit card floated in front of me.
> Control Key: Toronto Transportation Network
> Possession of this key falls to the highest ranking member of the team which owns it.
>
> Powers:
> TTC - Team members may freely use Toronto Transportation Network nodes
> [Locked]
I’d never seen a locked power on an item before. Hidden, sure, but never locked.
I grabbed the key out of the air. “System? What’s the Toronto Transportation Network?”
Long pause.
“Hey System? Did you hear the question?”
System: Affirmative
Exceedingly long pause.
I’d been brushed off in countless ways before when System didn’t want to answer my questions, but I’d always received at least some kind of response, even if it was to say it couldn’t give me an answer.
“So?” I said. Instead of an answer, notification windows started popping up.
System: Checking supplemental Hidden Quest requirements
System: Confirming Affinity match
System: Void Affinity confirmed
I knew where this was going.
System: You have gained a title: The Great Sage
System: You have a new Gift: Command Line
A gift! Those are the only abilities that had and real value to me as rewards anymore. Probably didn’t have Murder Hobo to thank this time, though. I had no idea what Command Line was, but it was definitely something specific to the Great Sage.
Gifts:
Command Line: User Access Level – Great Sage
I had no idea what that meant yet but I really liked the sound of it.
System: You know Fifth Dimensional Physics
System: You know Alchemy
System: Error – Power effect redundancy through existing Power: Are You Gonna Drink That?
System: You know Artifice
System: Error – Power effect redundancy through existing Power: Isn’t It Enchanting
System: You know Synthesis
System: Error – Player already knows Synthesis
System: Resolving compensation for multiple redundancies
System: Adding additional compensation for ineligible mastery evolution for Skills: Magical Theory, Thaumaturgy
Oh yeah. I’d forgotten about those. I can’t wait to see what kind of compensation I’d get to replace three new powers and two skill evolutions.
System: Resolution generated – You know Need A Hand?
I still stood by my opinion that this whole isekai into a game thing was totally unfair, but I had to admit, it did at least seem to try to be fair in some ways. It didn’t have to compensate me at all, but if you were going to do it at least do it right, you know? I mean, all it gave me was a measly power?
Ah well, I suppose asking for two gifts would’ve been a bit much, after all a new power would be a pretty big deal for anyone else. But just one power in return for all that? That was just...you know what? I shouldn’t whine before I knew how bad it is. Who knows, maybe whatever it was could be synthesized into something half decent.
Powers:
Need A Hand? – Novice: Temporarily share a Power
Um. What? Seriously? I can give one of my powers to someone else now? That’s just nuts.
No way that was an accident.
Up to this point, I’d convinced myself it was pure luck that I’d somehow managed to collect the unique combination of abilities that had given me cheat level powers and skills. But this was too much. It’d be a decent power for anyone else, but for me? Such a cheat! I couldn’t have wished for a better power to get.
What are the odds a random reward algorithm would land on that particular power for me?
Exactly.
The selection of rewards couldn’t be random after all.
That meant...
System, System, System. What were you up to?
I might not have known why System had chosen me to twist into this cheat-tier support character, but given that it was System I did know one thing: it wasn’t against the rules.
Which gave me a hunch.
“System, are you allowed to tell me what this transportation network thing is now?”
System: The Toronto Transportation Network connects transit nodes within the greater Toronto area
That must mean the affinity circles. Let’s look at that control key again.
> Control Key: Toronto Transportation Network
> Possession of this key falls to the highest ranking member of the team that owns it.
>
> Powers:
> TTC - All team members may freely use Toronto Transportation Network nodes
> YYZ - Use can control access to and movement between Toronto Transportation Network nodes
So becoming Great Sage unlocked the second power. Now I got it. This control key was an excellent reward. The first power was basically a free pass between affinity circles for everyone on my team, and the one I’d just unlocked gave the possessor of the key the ability to override that access for individual team members. I could see how that could be handy if someone on a team went rogue and started abusing the power.
I wished I could have a bit of time to digest the implications of what I’d just gained, but the notification windows kept coming.
System: Supplemental reward – the Great Sage may have a familiar
System: Create bond with Shoggoth Familiar?
“What the hell. Go for it.”
System: Forming bond with Shoggoth Familiar
System: Bond with Shoggoth Familiar complete
Well, my repulsive new minion, meet the new boss. Not quite the same as the old boss.
I waited for a bit, then said, “Uh, System? Aren’t I allowed to name it?”
There was another little pause, then:
System: Would you like to name your familiar?
“That actually worked, huh? Now I need to think of one. I know. I’ll call you Pinky. What do you think?”
The abominable eyes stared at me.
“Yeah, I like it too.”
System: Familiar name confirmed
System: Shoggoth Familiar Power unlocked: True Name
What was True Name? Sounded good, but this was all happening too fast. I tried to check out the familiar’s Status but it flickered and got replaced with a new notification.
System: Familiar reset confirmed
Wait, what? Reset? No.
System: Baby Shoggoth Familiar has been named Pinky
Wait, what? Now it’s just a Baby Shoggoth? Nooo.
> Pinky
> Baby Shoggoth, Familiar
>
> Powers:
> Blob - Novice: Change size and shape
> If You Could Read My Mind, Love - Novice: Share thoughts and senses with Master
> Ceaseless Hunger - Novice: Consume enchanted items with the chance of absorbing their Powers
> Vending Machine - Novice: Produce elixirs that replicate absorbed Powers
>
> Skills:
> All-Seeing - Novice
> Tentacle - Novice
Aw hell, no. Everything got reset, and now the True Name power’s not there anymore. But those new ones are...absurd.
There’s a chance that it’ll absorb the abilities of any magic item I feed it, then squirt out potions that give that effect to someone else. In the hands of most people, this would’ve been a great ability. But in mine? Unbelievable.
You know what, I think I’m okay with its masteries all getting reset.
“So, Pinky. What do you want to do today? How about we take over the world, huh?”
System: Global notification – the Void Dungeon has been solved and is now owned by Team Player
“Uh oh, Pinky. I have a feeling that’s gonna make some waves.”
System: You have a new Gift: I’ll Take The Force Of The Blow
Another new Gift? What for?
Gift:
I’ll Take The Force Of The Blow - Damage to a familiar or its master can be shared by both parties
Ah, it was a familiar thing. Did all this come from True Name? Wow. Named NPCs really were on a different level.
“That’s a pretty handy new gift we’ve got there Pinky. Let’s hope you’re tough. Just one more thing to check out, I need to find out what Command Line actually does.”
Suddenly, a new kind of notification window appeared.
>>> User Access: Great Sage confirmed
>>> Command Line provides access to game database
Yahello Command Line.