“Is the camera on?” A young man asked with the vast stellar cosmos shining brightly behind his radiant figure. He wore a loose-fitting green shirt with a loose button just below the collar to reveal his chest, his pants were plain white, and on his feet were a pair of shoes with a star on the bottom of its heels.
He was impossibly beautiful, with equal parts masculine and feminine. He had pale yellow skin and bright yellow eyes, with his pupils in the form of glowing stars that exuded great splendor and charm. His fluffy yellow hair reached the ends of his neck, with the tips of each strand releasing traces of stardust.
Opposite the divine beauty was an abnormally large cat with black fur that stood up on its two hind legs, and held a camera glittering with a never-ending trace of fairy dust. The cat gave a thumbs up and said in a strange language akin to a meow, “Yep!”
“Thanks for helping me out, Mashi. I knew you were busy handling work and all that,” the young man said with a grateful smile as his starlight hair moved and shifted as if countless stars are collapsing and being created at the same moment.
“No problem! I was beginning to grow bored spreading my doctrine around that it was driving me nuts. Heh, I still remembered being an atheist when I was still a mortal cat, now look at me, a hypocritical cant (basically means cunt) that is also spreading their religion,” the abnormally large cat named Mashi said with a deep sigh. “At least I now know of the Truth of most religions, am I right?”
“Ugh, your pun sounds horrid,” Yesis snorted and inwardly thought. Fuck, that was funnier than it should be.
Yesis then coughed as Mashi pointed the camera at Yesis. The young man smiled, wore a bright smile, and started to speak.
“Welcome everybody to the one and only Interview With the Supreme Existences of the Omniverse! I’m your host, the supreme god of all things popular, Yesis! And today, we’re here to interview a few certain people that you might all be familiar with!”
“And as of right now, we’re already here at the first guest’s place!”
The young man laughed lightly and snapped his fingers, warping reality around him to his whim as white smoke erupted out of his sleeves, forming a strange scene.
“From his birth, he knew that he belonged to the realm of immortals and not of the mortal realm!!”
“In his rise, he knew he was the one who was considered unrivaled under the heavens!”
“He attained immortality from the heavenly peaches, removed his name from the book of death, and many more that it just sounds absurd! Acquiring immortality over and over and over again as if he’s stacking their effects to become truly immortal!”
“He journeyed to the west all across India, and eventually found enlightenment, achieving Buddhahood!”
“Yes, ladies and gentlemen, it’s your favorite unrivaled Monkey King—Sun Wukong!”
As the clouds that depicted Sun Wukong’s past and his historical moments disappeared away from the camera, a hairy humanoid monkey with silver white fur stood proudly, holding a golden staff and wearing golden armor, along with a headband over his forehead.
“Tell us, Sun Wukong, how was your journey like to reach Buddhahood and become a Supreme Existence?”
…
Yesis was once again at another place, this time, he found himself in a serene forest with a simple dirt road leading to a tranquil lake.
Near the lake, a man with dark brown skin and golden-colored eyes akin to endless blooming flowers sat on a wooden chair, feeding the animals around him with a smile that evoked deep emotions onto the others around him.
“Powerful as ever, Buddha!” Yesis greeted the man in a casual manner while the cameraman behind him followed like a silent shadow.
“It’s been a long time indeed.” Buddha laughed heartily and nodded to the cameraman as a way to greet Mashi.
“You mind if we sit on the ground? Or can we create a chair?”
“You can do you as you please,” Buddha gave a hearty laugh as the animals around him dispersed.
“Great!” Yesis snapped his fingers and created a chair from nowhere, sitting on it while creating another mic by bending reality on a whim.
“To be frank, your interview idea sure is interesting, although you’re not the first one to have done so. Still, to have even Sun Wukong get interviewed is an accomplishment in itself.” Buddha chuckled softly and grabbed the mic from Yesis.
“Hahaha. You wouldn’t even believe me when he attacked me out of nowhere when we first met. Can you believe it? A newly ascended Supreme Existence has to fight someone like him?” Yesis shook his head in dismay.
“Well, unless you’re like Rob, then it was fine that you lost.” As Buddha mumbled, his eyes sparkled and bloomed as he wore a surprise smile. “It seems like you’ve truly landed yourself a big catch.”
“Yes, I managed to get an interview with the Devouring Darkness himself, the man who can even be said to be feared by more people than Satan, Rob Fortune.”
…
“So, that was Sun Wukong, Buddha, Odin, Zeus, God, and other major gods of the major pantheons. I even interviewed Satan, now all that’s left is this guy.” Yesis sighed inwardly and stared at the strangely normal house in front of him.
But, he wasn’t fooled by its normal appearance, as he can feel the dense fabrics of reality that make up every inch of the normal house. Even with his level of strength, Yesis would find it hard to break through a single wall of that house.
Even with his almighty power, he was shocked by how extravagant this house was.
As expected of… him.
He once again sighed inside his mind and recalled the legendary tales of that bloodthirsty demon.
Countless realities were destroyed in his rise to power. An endless cosmic sea of blood and flesh was created wherever he went. The light of life was quickly enveloped by the devouring darkness in his presence.
Calming himself down, Yesis knocked on the door, and heard a voice call out, “Come in.”
Opening the door with a click, Yesis walked in with Mashi following behind as their furry legs trembled. As soon as they entered, they were greeted with a brightly lit living room, with a shoe rack to the side, and a mat on the ground. There was also a floating sign in front of him with the following words written: Take off your shoes.
My shoes? My divine equipment? Inside this demon’s house?
No, even if he can’t kill me, he can sure as hell give me a hellish time. I better not offend this guy.
Shaking his head, Yesis reluctantly sighed and took off his shoes, while Mashi looked around the house since they didn’t have to wear shoes as a cat. They then placed their shoes on the shoe rack beside them and moved into the living room.
It was as simple as its exterior, with a few couches surrounding a table, along with a television placed on the wall. There were also some bookshelves with books inside, some potted plants, and even paintings.
Following that, the lights flickered for a moment, and a person was suddenly on the chair in front of them out of nowhere.
I didn’t even sense him?! He’s that strong?!
Yesis involuntarily gulped in fear and stared at the man in front of him.
You might be reading a stolen copy. Visit Royal Road for the authentic version.
Pale white skin, pure black eyes, and long abyssal black hair. He was devilishly handsome, with a piercing gaze that would send shivers down a person’s soul. Even though he was simply sitting, Yesis felt as if he was suddenly plunged into a world of eternal darkness.
“Sit down…” the man lightly called out and pointed at the couch opposite to where he sat.
“Y-Yes,” Yesis stammered and slowly sat down on a nearby couch, while Mashi carefully stood in the middle of the two to get the perfect angle and avoided intruding on the man’s privacy and focused the camera on the duo, and only on the duo.
“Yesis, correct?” The man wore an impassive face and leaned his head against his palm.
“That’s correct, mister Fortun-“
“Just call me Rob, being called Fortune… annoys me.” He squinted his eyes as a bit of his anger leaked out, causing the entire house to tremble out of nowhere.
Yesis almost launched an attack then and there so he could escape, but forcefully held back that urge and acted as if he wasn’t scared shitless already.
Even though we’re both supposedly nigh-omnipotent, he’s way too fucking scary to be on the same level! He must be on par with Buddha, Satan, God, Sun Wukong, and Odin!
Rob then shook his head as the house stopped trembling, and he chuckled softly, “Sorry for my rage, I just remembered some very unpleasant memories. And you must be hungry for those stories, am I correct?”
“Indeed, sir.” Yesis nodded his head. “To be more exact, we’d like to hear your story regarding your rise to power, how you reached this kind of terrifying strength, and your reasons for doing so.”
“Oh, that’s pretty easy to explain!” Rob laughed loudly as his dark eyes flared with light. He slowly leaned forward, his long winding hair dripping down in front of his face and neck.
“It’s because life is simply unfair."
“Un… fair?” Yesis was surprised by the answer, and his interviewer mindset started to kick in as his previous fear slowly disappeared. “Care to explain for the viewers, sir?”
“Hehehe, sure, sure. We’re all all-powerful anyways, but not all-knowing. For example, do you know that a majority of my past incarnation, I had to live as an animal or a species that is treated as a monster by the dominant species in the worlds I lived in?”
“I… didn’t know that. That’s indeed strange…” Yesis thought to himself. Huh, a majority of his past incarnations? I heard rumors regarding the fact that he had supposedly reincarnated countless times before he became an Ascended. Not to mention the fact that he had also died numerous times before becoming a Higher Existence, and also restarted over and over before finally becoming a Supreme Existence.
“Right? Most of us here would have more past lives as a sentient species since those who are unintelligent would have a harder time reaching our stage, though not impossible of course.”
“That’s true.” Yesis agreed since it’s indeed a factual truth.
“Well, that’s just a fun little fact for you. Now, as to why I deem life unfair, it’s pretty simple, really. First, let me ask you a question.” Rob smirked and leaned back on his couch.
“A question? Well, please do ask!” Yesis was slowly bubbling with excitement at his interview’s smooth sailing.
“Tell me, in your journey to your supreme level, was there ever that one single moment that sticks out like a sore thumb, that one single moment that caused your skyrocketing growth?” Rob said and continued to explain in case Yesis didn’t understand what he meant. “For example, going back in time to start all over again with your memories intact, acquiring a multidimensional travel watch to traverse your home reality’s infinite multiverse and such?”
“That…” Yesis paused and answered with a smile, “Well, yes actually. I only learned of this way later when I finally became an Ascended, but I was actually my home reality’s Reality’s Chosen, so I was given the thing that acted as the biggest foundation for my Supreme Truth.”
“Oho? Was it a system?” Rob smiled as a glint appeared in his abyssal eyes.
“Yes, it was a system! It was called Starlight Popularity System,” Yesis said with a chuckle and demonstrated. He waved his arm, and a strange yellow screen appeared from nowhere.
[Welcome back, Host.]
“That must have been quite the lucky gift you’ve been given.” Rob grinned and tapped the edge of his armrest. He then looked at the camera, staring right at it with sarcastic excitement, and said with a jovial tone. “You heard that, dear viewers?”
“Look at this lucky fellow, reaching the pinnacle of the realm above the infinite realities, the omniverse, a Supreme Existence that stands atop infinity and eternity. He can snap his finger and a reality can implode on itself, he can wink and a new one would be created!”
Rob looked back at Yesis with a wide grin, “Your journey must have been smooth sailing, huh? You managed to live through those skirmishes with death and acquire more benefits than losses, received lucky opportunities left and right, and eventually become a Supreme Existence in a few million years.”
“W-Well… Yes-“
“IT MUST HAVE BEEN SO FUCKING FUN TO LIVE A LIFE LIKE THAT, HUH?!”
“You wanna know how I got to this point? Huh?” Rob gritted his teeth as dark, shadowy smoke started to emit from his pores.
“I was just fucking eating my breakfast as usual, then I got reincarnated to another world of the usual cultivation and shit, but guess what, it was pure accident by a shitty ant who can’t even fucking reach the level of a Multiversal snail.”
“Because of that ant, I had to suffer so fucking much. I had no cheats, I had no special powers, I was a fucking slave within a week to my otherworld journey, and had to be fucked in the ass by some pegging fatass pig princess.”
“Then when I managed to escape that universe after numerous reincarnations, starting over and over again because of some slight misfortune, I was deemed as some devil by my home reality and had to fight for my fucking life with every single twist and turn, and then the Higher Existence who created my reality noticed my presence and decided to send his Chosen to hunt me down like a beast.”
“I just wanted to rest after becoming a Universal Level Existence, you know? Maybe return to a normal mortal life, continue my breakfast, and act as if nothing happened. But nope, my simple revenge lead to my entire home reality hunting me down and then I had to start all over again.”
Rob blabbered endlessly, his rage and anger were boiling with each word he spouted.
“I HAD TO FUCKING SUFFER TO REACH THIS POINT. I HAD TO SUCK COCK AND LICK PUSSY OF ORCS, EAT HUMAN MEAT TO NOT STARVE TO DEATH, REINCARNATE OVER AND OVER, RESTARTING MY PROGRESS EVERY SINGLE TIME, BEFORE I ASCENDED OUT OF MY HOME REALITY.”
“Then guess what? When I entered the Omniverse, the creator of mine was actually an influential asshole and was angered I killed his Chosen and stole his cheat, so I had to be hunted down for another fucking hundreds of thousands of years before I became a Higher Existence.”
“After that, when I started to enact my revenge, guess who became the villain? So what if I killed infinite lives in the process by eating their realities? They deserved it!”
“Then, I died. I restarted, restarted, hunted, and hunted, and I’d probably been the only being in existence who had become a Higher Existence so many times. The Demonic Scourge, Damnable Thief, Betrayer of Humanity, and then Devouring Darkness. Heh, that title has a real ring to it, ya know?”
“Heh, in the end, I reached this stage by the time I couldn’t even remember how old I was.”
“Isn’t life so fair? Here you are, born as a Reality’s Chosen or given some absurd cheat. As for me? Oh, I just spent a few eons before I became a Supreme Existence, restarting over and over again for who knows how many times.”
“O-Oh, wow, uh… That’s a truly hard journey you’ve been through…”
Even Yesis was shocked by the infodump he just heard to the point he could even begin to sympathize with the demonic man who ate the souls of babies for breakfast, schemed against his entire reality to sell it to Satan so he can become an Ascended, devoured the realities of so many Higher Existences that he became the most wanted target in the Omniverse for hundreds of thousands of years…
No, yeah, this guy’s still a demon. Whew, I’m glad I became a Higher Existence when he already ascended to the supreme throne. Although the Devouring Darkness Vestiges he had spread all throughout the Omniverse sure is scary.
“Tsk, get out, your face annoys me just thinking about that stupid golden finger of yours.” Rob clicked his tongue and snapped his fingers, and in the next moment, Yesis and Mashi found themselves in an endless void of… nothing.
“We’re in Nothing? I couldn’t even resist getting teleported here!” Yesis exclaimed in shock and looked back to the camera.
“Sigh, mister Rob Fortune truly is as powerful as the rumors depict him to be. Maybe with all the hardships he went through, he has acquired such deep strength that leaves one in awe. That is all from me, Yesis, and see you all later.”
Click.
…
Rob stood in an empty room, his eyes staring at the ceiling in a daze.
A few more seconds. After that, the condition is perfectly set for my rebirth!
Hahaha! I’ll be saying goodbye to this accursed life! I’ll be starting all over, and saying goodbye to my bad luck forever!
Systems, grandpas in rings, returning back in time with a cheat, all of those golden fingers would be mine for the taking!
Fuck all of you lucky bastards! I’ll be a lucky bastard too! I’ll be the luckiest bastard out there in the infinite realities! Then I’ll ascend back to becoming a Supreme Existence in the most luckiest way possible!
As he thought in fervor, his entire house started to shake and a bright golden light burst out of the air in front of him.
Sitting on a wooden chair beside a serene lake, Buddha opened his eyes and his flower-shaped pupils gleamed with a golden luster, “It seems like more lives would continue to suffer under that demon, but sadly, he’s too cunning and devious. Even I am hopeless against his arrangements.”
Sighing helplessly, Buddha simply closed his eyes and spied on the event that would soon be the start of the omniverse’s terror.
The bright golden light started to gather into a small sphere shining with endless radiance and endless power, power that even shocked Buddha.
That sphere… it has the potential to grow to the point it can rival a Supreme Existence at my level! How long has he been planning this for?!
“Fortune, oh my beloved Fortune Stealer! Hahaha! I’ll truly embody the meaning of my true name from this moment forth! Rob Fortune, how delightful!”
“Now, let’s go! Let’s start over with the cheat personally created by me, a Supreme Existence!”
“Isn’t that one of the luckiest starts you could ever get?” He laughed and turned to look back at Buddha with a toothy grin.
Buddha was silent for a moment before he then sighed and answered, “Indeed. It’s indeed a lucky start.”
“Hehehe, see you in a while, Buddha! No hard feelings if I were to ever bully the past you in one of the realities I’ll enter later. Though don’t be too hard on me if I were to ever meet an avatar of yours.”
Buddha simply nodded his head, and without being able to do anything, watched as the golden sphere of light enter Rob’s chest.
A burst of golden light then exploded out once more, and by the time it disappeared, Rob Fortune was gone from the Omniverse, gone to who knows where with whatever evil scheme he has successfully concocted.