“Percival! Open this door now before I add to the month’s expenses! You’ve missed a week of lessons and it’s time for this episode of yours to end. Return to your studies at once!”
God he’s here. Just another fly buzzing around my corpse. Doesn’t he know how empty I am? No, nevermind, no one’s ever been as empty as I am right now. But. A tiny voice in my mind whispers advice to me.
“What if he does something to you? She never trusted him, aaaalways watched him whenever he was in the room, protecting you. You trust her, right? He’s dangerous. You know what he is. The Eternal Sword. Swords cannot be kind. They can only hurt. All he’s ever done is hurt and that’s what he’ll do again. You’ve made him angry and it’s going to get worse. You have to escape.”
But where would I go? The only places I know are still on his land.
“The spring, the spring! Return to the spring! It will keep you safe. He doesn’t care for nature or beautiful sights, he’ll never think to go there!”
Alright. I guess I’m escaping. I sit up, still clutching Boar’s Thorn. I strap it on, grab my cloak, and open a drawer in my dresser to retrieve a pair of daggers I made a bit after Sword Crafting Week. They’re strong and I think they can hold my weight. I think. I’m almost completely sure they can and thus I’m willing to take that chance more so than the one shoulder charging my door right now. Thankfully, the door’s made of some seriously thick and sturdy hardwood from the beginning of time or something. It’s barely even budging.
I don’t have any rations but I think I can forage well enough, she taught me how to tell what plants I can and can’t eat when we went to the spring last time. It’s like second nature to her, to teach me things. I don’t need water as I’m going to a spring I can drink from. So! Time to escape!. I clamber up to the window sill and take a deep breath. Wow, that’s, uh, a long fall. A little longer than I thought. Um, maybe this isn’t a good idea.
Just as I had that thought I jump out of my skin and start to fall backwards. Oh. So this is how I die. The last thing I see before my vision is filled with blue sky is my father standing in the rubble of the doorway, greatsword in hand. Our eyes meet and for the first time in my life I see emotion there: Panic. He sprints to the window but I’m gone.
The wind rushes around me and fills my ears. It’s all I can hear. The exhilaration from the fall makes my heart leap in my chest and my whole body brace. Will it hurt a lot when I hit the ground? I hope not. My vision starts going black and then…nothing.
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Alright so the fastest way to get to Val is to go in through their window. I stopped my mad dash at the base of their tower and looked up, sizing up the ascent when one of my worst nightmares happened in front of my eyes. Val fell out of their window. FUCK FUCK FUCK.
“VAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!”
I screamed in horror and lost a few seconds with which I could be saving their life. Fucking idiot!
“Light as a feather, light as air, I will not die this day for to fly I dare, Limited Flight!”
Roughly 5 seconds before Val hit the ground the spell kicked in and they stopped falling like some giant grabbed an elevator mid free fall. Which is to say, I heard something crack in Val which scared the absolute piss out of me.
“Um um um shit shit I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry please don’t die you can’t die fuck fuck fuck. Spirits of nature, light, and water, come to me and show me what ails this poor wounded soul, Diagnostics.”
Oh. My. Gods. I fucking cracked their goddamn spine. I’m awful, I’m the worst! Ok ok, Rose, stop panicking, you can fix this before they even wake up.
“Goddess of Light, I call upon your name, Luma Éadrom, to heal one injured and suffering! Sun’s Healing!”
Thank everything that is was noon on a cloudless day or else this spell wouldn’t have worked and I’d need to think of something else. However, it was sunny enough out and that sunlight seemed to concentrate on Val, suffusing them in a warm sunny spot. The light lasted for about a minute before fading back to normal. I recast Diagnostics to make sure Val was alright and yep, everything’s normal. Same Val as always. I’ve, used a lot of mana today actually and am pretty worn out but I need to cast one more spell.
“Oh spirit of air, light and quick and temporary as every breeze, lift what I wish and take it where I desire, Levitate.”
With this last spell I am drained but Val’s now mobile. They are very unconscious so I figure I’ll just float them up the tower. But why were they in the window in the first place? I look up at the tower’s window and swear I see flame red hair for a second. Hmm. Did Robutt threaten Val? Why? He’s usually indifferent to Val, and the one time I saw him as anything but was when he defeated the thing in the woods to save Val. Why would he then defenestrate them a week later? As much as I hate the man, that doesn’t make sense. Buuuttttt if Val felt the need to escape badly enough that they were going to take their chances going out the window, then I need to get them away from here. A little voice in the back of my mind starts sharing its opinion.
“To the spring! You’ll be safe there! Don’t you remember the way the mana swirled and pooled there? No harm can come to those in that glade. Return to the spring and the Duke cannot hurt Val.”
Mhm. Mhm. It’s true that the mana in the spring’s glade is interesting, a mix of water, earth, nature, and light. It could be possible for it to possess defensive properties to those inside. But that begs a different question. I quickly start moving Val away from their tower while thinking.
“So. Who else is in my head but me?”
“…”
“C’mon, fess up. I know you’re in there, whoever you are. I don’t really think of Robutt as the Duke and I didn’t think about the possible defensive properties of the spring’s glade, so! Fess up and tell me who you are and what you want and I won’t nuke you into oblivion when I find you. And if you’re rooting around in my head space you’ll soon realize that I know a LOT of ways to do just that.”
I hear a deep sigh in my head, seems they’re giving up the charade.
“Fine. I am the Goddess whose power you just called on. Lady of the Sun’s Door, Progenitor of Life, Queen of the Firmament.”
“Why, Luma Éadrom, a pleasure to make your acquaintance. But I will ask again, what are you doing in my head?”
“Foolish child, you speak to one who could snuff your fragile existence out as easily as swatting a fly and speak with such disdain?”
“Sorry but I don’t respond well to threats or the bullies that make them so if you want something from me you’d better nix the attitude.”
Such pretention. But since my goal is to help your ward and not you, I will make the exception. I wish merely to protect my descendant. She has a destiny to fulfill and thus must not fall to her wayward father.”
“First off, you’re gonna have to explain about the whole ‘Val is your descendant’ thing, because I’m pretty sure the Quentins are mortals and always have been. Second, I’m not a fan of destiny so it’d better be along the lines of ‘Val gets to live a happy life where they pursue any and everything that could bring them true lasting joy.’”
Another deep sigh followed. Man I must be amazing at pissing off authority figures if my track record in my life and afterlife is as good as this.
“You are quite annoying, do you know that? Very well. Val’s mother is of my lineage. Also, the Quentins are mortal but are blessed by the God of Fire Vulphastune. And as for her destiny, it is both grander and simpler than what you spoke. I cannot say more, lest you destroy her path with well-meaning meddling.”
“Hmm. Fine. If you won’t tell me what it is but don’t want me to meddle in it, at least tell me this: WIll Val be happy? That’s really all I care about these days. If the path you gave them isn’t going to make them happy then I’ll find a way to make it happy, and if that involves going through you, then so be it.”
“So much cheek for a soul already rent by an earthly affliction. So much spine for one that so recently begged me to save their ward, and didn’t even fulfill the conditions of the contract made. I am being lenient with you, for your absence has already distressed her enough. Do not take chances like that again. You mean nothing to me but everything to her. You are her shield and you should be thankful that I do not throw away useful tools.”
“I so dearly want to meet you in person so I can punch you in the face, but you still haven’t answered my question: Will Val be happy?”
“That is up to her. She will be content at the very least. At least, I am fairly sure. You are an unfortunate and unpredictable yet necessary variable. If anything will ruin her contentment and happiness, it is your meddling. When a light shines on one fork of a crossroads, do not run into the shadows out of petty spite. When she offers an idea that disagrees with yours, listen. It will be difficult given your stubborn personality but know that I will be guiding her.”
“Man I’m going to call on you so often with every spell I have. You’re gonna be sick of me by the time this is through.”
Reading on Amazon or a pirate site? This novel is from Royal Road. Support the author by reading it there.
“I am already sick of you, calling upon my power frivolously will not anger me further.”
“I hope you don’t call me again. I hope you won’t call Val but I suppose that’s probably off the table.”
“I also hope this is our first and final conversation. She will be my contact with the mortal world from now on.”
As she finished speaking I found myself trembling. Fucking shit I swear my knees are about to buckle. A goddess? Talking to me?! Nope, nuh uh, not having it. Apparently I’m great at keeping my cool under pressure but I feel like I’m going to vomit. You ever stare down a dragon? I have and I didn’t feel nearly as much all encompassing terror as just now. Fuck, do I have nerves of adamantite? Is this a skill I can market? Patent? Actually, no, fuck that, I ain’t doing that shit again if I can help it. Thankfully, I seem to have pissed her off enough to leave me alone in future so that’s a plus.
I managed to wobble back to Glenn’s Spring, Val in tow. This time, I could feel the difference in atmosphere, could feel the defensive nature of the mana here. I should’ve realized the first time I stepped in here that it was in some way connected to the Goddess of Light. The light here is a little too perfect and soothing and unbelievably gorgeous. Damnit, I can’t hate it, it’s too pretty. Just being here makes me relax and release tension which is more important now than ever due to the amount of stress I was just under. Now then, it seems to me that I should make Val a bed before I dump them on the ground. I find a large patch of thick moss and cast Growth on it and bingo bango I’ve got a comfy bed for one teenager. I direct the summoned wind spirit to place them gently on the moss, then dismiss it.
Normally Val looks peaceful and relaxed while sleeping but this time they seem really distressed. Which makes sense, they did pass out after falling out a window to certain death. But I love to meddle, as the goddess said.
“Be still, be calm, and rest under my balm, May our dreams be sweet and keep you safe from harm.”
This time I gave them a dream of a memory of ours. When Val was 8 and we made their first wooden box. I was super proud and they were ecstatic. It was a really, really nice day for me and I think it was the same for Val.
After that, I just settle down and wait. This glade makes me feel safe, like the goddess said and I…almost want to…drift off to sle-”
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“Rose, Rose! Look! I did it!”
“You sure did buddy! Man look at that, what a great box! Now then, test the lid and make sure it swings and closes properly and snugly. If it doesn’t we can fix it.”
“It works just right! Isn’t it great! Aren’t I amazing?”
“Yes Val, you certainly are.”
It’s interesting. I remember this, but from the other person’s perspective. Right now I feel everything that Rose felt back then: she was proud, happy, and there’s this slight melancholy that I somehow know is because I remind her of her sister that she left behind when she died. I want to tell little me to comfort her but all they see is Rose being a proud teacher. Come on me! Can’t you see that she’s hurting inside?
“Now then, what do you want to use it for?”
“Umm. You know the ravens and the crows?”
“Yeah! I really like corvids, they’re such smart and kind birds.”
“Well, sometimes I give them little shiny things and sometimes they give me things in return. They’re my friends but I don’t want to keep hiding their gifts where I have been because the maids throw them away even when I try to tell the that it’s not trash.”
“That’s awful! So you’re saying that the box will be for the treasures the birds give you?”
“Yeah!”
“That seems like a fine idea. Let’s see if we can find a raven to give a gift. It’s always good to reassure your friends that you love them still.”
“In that case, I love you Rose!”
“Aggghhh my heart. Help, help! Get a doctor!”
“Ahhhhhh!!!! What’s wrong? What can I do?!”
“I need an ambulance, you just stole my heart.”
“I. What? How did I do that? How do I put it back!?”
“Pfffttt hahahaha no no no buddy, I’m joking. See? Fit as a fiddle! It’s just that you were so cute and sincere when you said that you loved me that I couldn’t help it.
“Oh. Should I not have said that?”
“Oh no, no takesies backsies. Also you should say it a lot more because I love you too friend.”
Gods I was so happy then. And Rose was too it seems, but there’s still this feeling of…deep pain. Why does she hurt so much? Now that I’m focusing on it, it’s not even just emotional pain but actual, real physical pain. But she acts like it’s nothing. I’ve never heard her seriously complain about pain so how does she ignore it? Is she just used to it by now? Has she always hurt this much? I can’t even imagine that. And the emotional hurt, it feels like it runs deep. It’s connected to the feeling of being a big sister it seems. Does she not want to be one anymore? Is that how she still feels about me? That I’m her younger sibling? That makes my heart hurt a little. But it’s better than her leaving me. Oh that’s right. She left me behind. The memory was so nice I forgot.
I woke up not in a cold sweat or any panic, just suddenly went from asleep to awake, eyes snapping open. Silhouetted against the stained glass light of Glenn’s Spring is the woman I love, snow white and ice blue hair flowing down to one side as her sapphire eyes look at me with worry and then, seeing me awake, relief and happiness. I wonder what lies behind those emotions that she keeps hidden so well.
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“Val! You’re awake! Are you ok? Do you hurt anywhere?”
“I’m fine. And no I don’t hurt.”
“What’s the last thing you remember?”
“Umm. My father was trying to break into my room so I was going to climb down the tower but as I got on the sill he smashed the door and I. Yeah, I fell out of the tower. Am I a ghost like you?”
“No you idiot! I was there and caught you before you became a stain.”
“Not to criticize but I’m fairly certain you don’t have the physical capability to catch anything, let alone me after I fell off a tower.”
“Jerk! I used magic! I was, uh, a bit late in catching you so you kinda…broke a bit when I caught you. B-b-but I fixed it! No lasting damage!”
“Ok, so you saved me. I guess you’re going to leave again now that you know I’m fine? I won’t stop you if that’s what you want.”
“Why would I leave?”
“Because you’ve always wanted to leave me?”
“Pfft, wrong, try again.”
“But you abandoned me at the first opportunity!”
“I didn’t abandon you! What gave you that idea?”
“The stupid spell you cast! You wanted to leave me so badly that you jumped at the chance to k-k-kill yourself. Just to get away from me! You hate me, admit it!”
“Dumbass! I don’t hate you and I don’t want to die! I cast that spell because it was a life or death situation and you’re just worth that much to me!”
“Nothing should be worth your life!”
“YOU are worth so much more to me.”
“I can’t be worth that much! It’s too much!”
“Why won’t you believe me that I love you that much?”
“Because I can’t live without you!”
“Is. Is that right?”
“YES. And you were gone for 8 days. The spell only lasted for a week!”
“Wait, when did you hear that?”
“We read it together! Two years ago, in class! It was a class about old legends and one of them talked about that spell!”
“Wild. But also, you should know the point of casting that spell.”
“It’s a protection spell, I got that. Still not worth the risk.”
“It’s the Ultimate protection spell. That requires a lot of input to get that output.”
“It’s got a 100 percent mortality rate! That’s unacceptable! Surely there was a less powerful but fully feasible spell you could’ve cast!”
“So. Um. There was. But I didn’t think of it at the time because the threat was imminent and I was panicking. It was something I’d never even heard of before, I was scared shitless! So I did what I used to do while I was in that game and facing down an overwhelming unknown: Protect the party first. That’s you buddy. You’re the only party I’ll ever want or need.”
“I’m still mad at you for not coming back after the week was over!”
“I’m. I’m sorry, I lost track of time.”
“How! ON EARTH! Did you lose track of time while imprisoned in a bubble for a week? Just watch the sun, dolt!”
“Ok, first off, rude. Secondly, I was talking with someone.”
“Liar!”
“I’m serious! Someone could see me and wanted to know my story for some reason.”
“Really. Someone just happened to pass by while you were there and just coincidentally could see you.”
“Yeah! His name was…um…gee I can’t remember.”
“What do you mean you can’t remember!? Fuck, Rose, you’re not helping your case!”
“I swear he was real! But once I started talking to him it was…it was like I couldn’t stop talking until my story was done. But I didn’t want to stop talking. It was weird, I just started telling him stuff I’ve never told anyone.”
“Wait a minute. This sounds like a story I know.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, My nanny as a kid would tell stories about the gods. One of them was about Ravdal Storytaker, God of Memory and Dreams.”
“Huh, how’s the story go?”
“The gist is that he appears before people who are alone and about to, well, either die or go on amazing adventures, and asks them their story. And they tell him, without fail. But in the story the person was really happy after Ravdal spoke to them, even though they told everything to him.”
“Huh. Maybe he’s also the god of therapy or something. But yeah, sounds like I met a God. Wild. But you understand now that I don’t want to leave you, right? How many times do I have to say that you’re my precious person and I never want to lose you, no matter what happens to me?”
“I understand that, but you need to get it through your thick skull that you need to forget about that last part. If I lose you forever I. I don’t think I can go on.”
They sound so heartbroken on that last bit that it surprises me. I lean forward and cup their face with my hands and tell them, staring into their eyes.
“You can and you will. I don’t plan on leaving you but if I do, just know that you are strong enough to keep going. You have to be. You don’t want me to die? Fine. I won’t stupidly sacrifice myself again. But. You have to promise me that if I do end up leaving you somehow, that you’ll continue down your own path.”
“I don’t want to promise that.”
“You have to.”
“I.”
“Promise me.”
“Alright. I promise.”
“Good.”
I lean in and kiss them on the forehead like I’ve done a thousand times before when I’m feeling sentimental but as I pull back their face is redder than their hair. Weird.
“Alright then. Are we agreed that we’ll both live forever?”
“Pfft. Yeah. Yeah I think we are.”
“Excellent. Now sit up we have company.”
“What! Who?”
“If I’m not mistaken iiiiiit’s ROBUTT! Come on down!”
The figure at the edge of the glade tried to step forward but was stopped by a barrier that became visible as he tried to cross the threshold.
“Spirit! WITCH! Allow me to claim my son and return them home!”