As soon as we re-appear in Ashley’s room, I feel my arms protest as Ashley seems to have gotten much heavier despite the absence of her armor. I quickly drop her onto her bed. Her eyes pop open then and meet mine.

“Zoe… oh no, we lost didn’t we?” she asks.

“No Ashley, we won!” I tell her, smiling. “We got Palmer to have a change of heart… I wish you had been conscious to see it!”

“Oh. Good,” she states. She pushes herself up and sits upright on the side of the bed. “If we won, why did you look so sad just then?”

“Oh… I looked sad?” I question, not realizing I was making that face. “I think that was just because my arms hurt from carrying you.”

“No, that’s not ‘sadness,’ Zoe,” she counters.

“Yeah, I suppose not… let me think about this for a minute.” I sit down next to her, pressed close against her so that our shoulders are touching.

“I… felt things in that palace that I never have before,” I explain. “It was like all the hurt and sadness I had over the past week exploded into anger… I got so angry at my parents, after seeing how they acted in that world. And after we got separated, I ran into Terra and Diana. Terra was just… so horrible to me. She treated me like I was this… creature, who wasn’t even human. I got so angry at her… I wanted to hurt her so badly…”

Ashley wraps her arm around me and holds me closer. I notice that tears had begun streaming down my face while I talked…

“I know that feeling too, Zoe,” she replies. “It’s a feeling that most people will thankfully never feel… there’s a special kind of ferocious anger you feel when someone treats you as subhuman, all because of something that’s not even your fault.”

“But it wasn’t a good feeling,” I tell her. “Underneath that anger, I felt so helpless and humiliated… I never want to feel that way again.”

“I’m sorry Zoe,” she says earnestly. “I never wanted any of this for you. But now it’s happened, and you’re… becoming more like me.”

I turn to her, surprised. “Ashley… why do you say that like it’s a bad thing?” I ask. “I want to be more like you… you’re so confident, and brave, and smart too!”

I’m hoping that she’ll be cheered up by this compliment, but instead, she looks at the floor, looking more morose than ever. There’s an awkward pause as neither of us say anything. I feel a bit guilty that my compliment backfired, so I change the subject.

“Ashley… do you think the people in that world meant how they acted?” I ask. “Diana and Yonca both seemed like they were sorry… they wanted to be friends with me again but were just afraid.”

“Hmm… interesting question,” she responds. “I think that they were, on some level. Diana would’ve been showing the side of her she keeps hidden away from that world, and Yonca’s behavior would’ve had to be based on something someone in the church knew about her… perhaps the two had even discussed this before, and it was Diana’s knowledge of Yonca that was reflected in the palace.”

“Huh. So that’s how it works?” I say, trying to wrap my head around that. I sigh. “But that means that Terra’s inner thoughts are even worse than how she normally acts… What’s happened to her?”

“Well, for all you know this is how she always was,” Ashley says.

“No… she wasn’t. A few years ago, a major terrorist leader was assassinated. In the cafeteria the next day, some boy told Yonca that he was sorry that ‘her leader’ had died… and Terra was the one who jumped to her defense, telling the boy that Yonca was not violent and he was horrible for assuming she wanted anything to do with that. But now, she was telling Diana and I that Yonca was our enemy…”

“Yonca’s not even the same ethnicity as the people behind Al Qaeda, what kind of ignorant trash would say that?” Ashley replies distastefully.

We sit together for a while longer, these unpleasant thoughts swimming around my head. Eventually, we are interrupted by a knock on Ashley’s door.

“Come in,” Ashley says.

Her mom comes in, also looking rather pensive. She looks at us for a moment and then teases, “Wow, you two sure are a rowdy couple tonight.”

I giggle a bit at this.

“So Zoe… it looks like we’ve finally got something worked out with your folks,” she explains. “I don’t think they’re going to harass us anymore, and you’ll be allowed to retrieve your things.”

I sigh with relief, feeling very happy. That means that our mission was a success!

“And Ashley… your dad and I were thinking of going out for dinner tonight, as sort of a celebration,” her mom continues. “Is there anywhere special you’d like to go?”

“Huh?” Ashley asks, like she was just spacing out. “Oh, I don’t care. Ask Zoe.”

“Um… could we go to Olive Garden? The one in Round Rock?” I request. “My family used to go there for celebrations.”

“Sure thing. That’s not too far away,” her mom says. “Well, go ahead and get ready, then…”

Suddenly, I have an idea. “Wait… I was wondering, could we bring our friends with, too? They’ve… done a lot to help me get through all of this.”

“Oh. Well, if their parents are fine with it, I don’t see why not,” her mom agrees. However, I swear I see something quickly flash across her face, so quickly I can’t tell what it is…

----------------------------------------

My parents took Zoe up on her suggestion and brought Anja and Nova to dinner with us. They told us all to order whatever we wanted, and boy did Nova do just that. He must’ve gotten the most expensive thing on the god damn menu. Well, I’ll give him credit for resisting the urge to bring his 3DS into the restaurant, at least.

“Thank you very much for taking us out!” Anja tells my parents, nodding at them politely.

“You’re welcome,” Mom replies. “See it as repayment for what you have done for Ashley and Zoe in the past weeks.”

“They’ve helped me out too,” Nova comments. “I see us all as even.”

“And they’ve helped me in a way, too,” Anja adds. “I realized that I really never talk to people with really different views than me, since I mostly agree with my dad and the people I follow on social media. That changed when I met Ashley… I’ve decided I’m gonna try and learn as much as I can, so I can throw the best possible arguments in Ashley’s face next time we argue about something!”

I scoff at her and say, “Whatever, Anja.” That said, I privately can’t help but to feel a glow of affection for her. I’m glad that she’s evolving so she won’t end up like one of those morons that use Tumblr.

“A fine idea,” Dad compliments her. “Talking with those who are ideologically different than you is very beneficial; either you will learn new things which change your mind about something, or your defense of your current positions will strengthen your resolve.”

“Are you very interested in politics?” Mom asks Anja. “Not a lot of kids your age are.”

“Yes,” Anja affirms. “It runs in the family… my mom was a distinguished public servant.”

Mom leans in a little, clearly interested. “Do you mind if I ask what her name is?”

“Ellen Beatty. You’ve most likely heard of her,” Anja responds.

Mom reacts more strongly to this than I expect; she gasps and her eyes pop wide open. “Anja… your mother and I were very close friends in high school, actually,” Mom explains. “I was absolutely devastated about her passing away. I knew that she had a daughter, but I had no idea she was the one who befriended my daughter!”

Well, that was news to me. Mom had told me the story about what happened to Beatty before, but never mentioned them being friends. And if they were such good friends, how did Mom not even know her daughter’s name? My guess would be that they were probably not on such good terms when Beatty died.

The tale has been illicitly lifted; should you spot it on Amazon, report the violation.

“Wow, you really knew her?” Anja replies, her eyes wide with amazement. “She’s a huge inspiration to me!”

“It’d be wrong for me to speak on her behalf too much, but I’ll say this much; she’d be very proud of who you’ve grown up into,” Mom tells Anja. “Even back in high school, your mother loved debating, and she debated with everyone. Some of our arguments about gun control got particularly heated…” Mom’s eyes glaze over, as if she was wistfully reliving memories of the good old days.

“Hehehe. So history repeats, then?” Anja jokes.

“That’s quite a good quality to have,” Dad remarks. “It will prevent you from becoming like some of the people at our former church… Zoe, I hope you do not take offense to that.”

Zoe, who has been still and quiet this whole time, shakes her head. “I don’t. They were too far gone.”

“Man, what was wrong with those people?” Nova questions. “How on earth could anyone ever defend what Zoe’s parents did?”

“Well, I’m not sure what kind of beliefs you two hold, so I’ll explain it this way,” Dad begins, and I can already feel another Dad Lecture coming. He tends to not talk much, but when he does, it is in long, through-composed speeches. I get to listen to one of these about once a week.

“When you start a new part of your life, you will have a strong emotional reaction to that thing. This can be a new job, a new hobby, a new friendship, a new romance, or, indeed, a new religion that you have converted to. Eventually, the excitement of the new thing will wear off as it becomes familiar and routine. However, that does not mean you should quit that thing; if you have built a strong foundation for that new relationship, it will survive the shift, like a house that was built on the rock. However, if you sought that thing only for the short-term gratification, it will fall apart then, like a house built on the sand. Many Christians grow afraid when that initial strong emotion wears off after conversion, and cling to anything which will bring back that feeling. They may shun secular media or grow distant from their friends outside the faith. Eventually, they may become deranged enough to rally against things that would be insignificant to a sane person, such as children reading stories about wizards or a retail store re-organizing its toy section. But only someone weak in faith would feel challenged by mere proximity to secular media and beliefs.”

“Huh, that makes sense when you think about it like that,” Anja comments, looking thoughtful. “It says a lot about how insecure they are as people.”

There’s a moment of silence after, as I suppose everyone is pondering Dad’s words or whatever. During this silence, our complimentary breadsticks arrive.

“Oh, excellent!” Anja says, excitedly grabbing a few. “These are so good, sometimes I just want to shove a bunch of them in my purse before I leave the restaurant…”

“Don’t eat too many, or else you won’t be hungry anymore when the entrees arrive,” Mom scolds her, grabbing a breadstick herself. “I do that every time we go here…”

“You know there are take out boxes you can get for these, right?” I question Anja.

Anja shakes her head at me as she swallows her first mouthful. “Ah, classic Ashley. Not getting the meme as usual…”

Before I can ask what she means by this, I hear a gasp from Zoe, who is fixated on something past my head. “Ashley, look!” she tells me. “I can’t believe it- I just saw Yonca walk in with her family!”

I turn my head and see Yonca walking with a man I recognize as the one Zoe’s parents were waterboarding earlier, an olive-skinned woman who resembles her, and a couple of older girls who must be older sisters of hers.

“Huh. What a coincidence.” I state.

“Ashley… what if it’s not a coincidence?” Zoe asks, looking inspired. “I… I wanna go talk to her.”

“I’ll go with you, then,” I tell her. “I could use a bit of fresh air afterwards anyway.”

Zoe makes eye contact with me, looking serious. “Ashley… I think this is something I should do by myself,” she says.

This annoys me for some reason I can’t really explain, but I shrug. “Oh, alright,” I respond. “I’ll go get some fresh air by myself, then.” And before anyone can stop me, I stand up and walk outside.

----------------------------------------

Something seems off about Ashley tonight… with her parents’ permission, I follow her outside to find her brooding around on a bench in front. I take a seat next to her, and she gives me a look of mild surprise and annoyance.

“What’s the matter, Ashley?” I question her. “You seem like you’ve been in a bad mood tonight.”

“Well, I’m not feeling very talkative, okay?” she answers defensively “Honestly, I kind of hate large gatherings like this anyway.”

“Well, this whole affair must have taken a lot out of you,” I reason. “The people we fought in that palace were all people you knew, right?”

She shakes her head. “Yeah, well, I never cared for them," she replies distastefully.

I frown at her. “You mean there's nobody at your church you like?"

"Sure they all act nice, but it's like Zoe said. That palace showed the real them. They're sick, hateful people who only care about clinging to the past." She says this with such venom that I can’t help but to be frightened of her…

After a moment, she locks eyes with me and asks, “Why are you looking at me that way? I'm not mad at you, you know." She sighs, her posture relaxing. “You've actually been a really good friend. So has Nova. Thank you."

“It’s no problem, Ashley,” I assure her. “But I have to wonder… you have that negative of a view of everyone from your church? Is that why you stabbed that one guy?"

“Who, Garrett? He was in the way."

"But you seemed to actually enjoy doing that,” I press her. “It was quite disturbing to watch."

Ashley shoots me a clearly annoyed glare. "Don't judge me before you know what I've been through.”

"I'm not judging you. I'm just worried about you."

Ashley doesn’t say anything to that, she just turns her head away from me. She clearly doesn’t appreciate me snooping like this, but I’m not ready to give it up yet.

"Do you have violent thoughts a lot?" I ask.

Ashley takes a deep breath and says, "Yes. I sometimes find myself dreaming about doing horrible things to people I don't like."

Ooh. Yikes. "Well, we all get angry sometimes," I offer diplomatically.

"You don't get it. I mean I think about doing these things and I enjoy it. It feels so, so good to hurt people."

I’m not sure which is worse; what she’s saying, or the rather casual way she’s saying it…

"Like the girl you slammed into the locker?" I ask.

She bristles once again. "You don't have to bring that up again."

I sigh. I’m gonna try changing strategies on her.

“Think of it this way,” I begin. “You seem to have a low opinion of most people. And, I do partially understand that, believe me. But before this year, you weren't friends with Nova or I. You probably would've assumed we were just like the rest of them, but we all ended up becoming friends. So how many others at our school, or even at your church, are people you could've been friends with if you got to know them more?"

Ashley shakes her head. "It's not that simple. I let you and Nova hang around me because I knew that you two weren't very popular, so you understood why the social structure is awful. But I don't want to be friends with anyone who's complicit in that. They're worthless to me."

With this indictment hanging in the air, I think it’s time to wrap up this discussion…

"Well... okay then,” I say. “Can you at least promise not to use violence on people? It’s really not good that you’re having these types of thoughts regularly. If you need an outlet you can use the Metaverse for that. Or take up playing Call of Duty or something.”

Ashley sighs heavily. “Yeah, I know. I won’t do anything like that again. And yes, I realize that I'm fucked up in the head. I have a lot of twisted thoughts floating around in there..."

“Well, if you bottle it all up, it'll only come out in a way that's unhealthy,” I urge her. “You can talk to one of us anytime you need to. Zoe, your parents, and Nova and I, we all love you- different types of love in each case, sure, but still.”

Ashley reacts oddly to this, taking in a sudden, sharp breath and closing her eyes. “Thank you… Anja,” she says, a hint of sadness in her voice.

“No problem!” I tell her. I lean over and give her a big hug, which she returns.

----------------------------------------

Man this is really fucking awkward. Anja, Ashley and Zoe are all gone somewhere, leaving me sitting alone with her parents… I just kinda slowly munch on my breadsticks and try not to make eye contact.

Thankfully, Zoe returns to her seat after a while, smiling and with a bit of wetness in her eyes. “It seems like… we can be friends again,” she explains. “She said she was sorry for not sticking up for me.”

“Oh, cool,” I say. I guess that was kinda a foregone conclusion after what happened in that palace.

“Good for you, Zoe,” Ashley’s mom says. “I hope that things get better for you two, I’ve been really worried about you both.”

“I think that things are going to get better,” Zoe assures her.

“We’ve been particularly worried about Ashley,” Ashley’s mom continues. “It’s not like her to get into fights at school. I can’t help but to feel that there are things that Ashley still isn’t telling us.”

Zoe cocks her head slightly. “Did she ever tell you about what happened at her old school before you all moved?”

“I’m… not sure what you’re talking about, so no,” Ashley’s mom says.

“Ashley told me once that she’s dealing with things she prefers to keep quiet,” I explain, since it seems relevant. “And that was after I knew about the lesbian stuff, so she wasn’t talking about that.”

“She implied such to me as well once…” Ashley’s dad adds.

“So, I must be the only one who knows about that,” Zoe comments, no longer smiling and now looking blank.

“Perhaps so,” Ashley’s mom agrees. “I won’t ask you to tell us for her, since that’s her right to do, but we need to have some serious talks as a family going forward. In high school, I had a boyfriend named Lucas. I loved him to death, but one day he lost his temper on me and exploded about something minor, and we broke up. He was clearly dealing with issues that none of us knew about, but I wasn’t able to get him to tell me about it. He ran away from home after that, and I have no idea what happened to him to this day…”

It goes back to awkward silence again after this, and Ashley’s mom kinda spaces out. Not too much later, Ashley and Anja sit back down, back from whatever the hell they were doing out there.

“I hope that the food arrives here soon,” Ashley dad says, which was exactly what I was just thinking. “I know you kids must have homework to do still, as this is a weeknight.”

“Oh, it’s alright,” I assure him. “I already did all mine before I got here.”

Ashley gives me a wide-eyed look. “Really? You did?” she asks. “You’re joking, right?”

“No I’m not joking!” I reply angrily. “I’m, uh, trying to get it out of the way soon so I won’t spend so much time dreading it. Sometimes I fail at that and procrastinate it anyway, but I felt motivated enough to do it tonight.”

Anja smiles at me. “Good for you!” she says, which makes me feel surprisingly warm inside. “I haven’t done mine yet, haha…” Zoe smiles at me too, but I don’t really get why…? She has that annoying look like she knows something I don’t. I hate it when people look at me like that!

What I don’t hate is that our food is finally fucking here. I start scarfing it down as quickly as I can. I got fettuccine alfredo with shrimp on top, and it’s sooo god damn good. Why didn’t everyone else get this? Finally, some good fucking food…