How did I get here? Up until this point in my life, there was an endless supply of certainty yet now, now all I have are questions. Before me is a killer who has been able to reinvent their life. I could shout something and plant a seed of doubt that would bloom into a destructive weed that shreds away all the effort this Zmela put into changing themselves for the better – but what then? What would my next step be? Destroying one life like that would be the same as killing again… no, killing would be more merciful. At least then they’d be remembered as a good and kind soul. Living through the discrimination once more after repenting would be truly hellish. Although can a killer – a serial killer – or even one who has only taken a single life – ever be worthy of redemption? Worthy of pity? Worthy of love? Worthy of a second chance? I thought… I thought there would be a chance. If I did enough good, it would offset the many evils I have committed but even if that were true, I am far beyond anyone giving me the opportunity to do good deeds. Instead, here I am at a crossroads. A cruel, dark, and eerie crossroad that dictates the grand finale of my life.

There are two options before me. I cannot escape the people here. My legs are exhausted and my arms are barely functional. The first option is that this is the finale. The dramatic end of a terrible serial killer – unable to escape the law, they instead took their own life. The shame and torment of what they had done finally got to them. Or maybe the great Fa was killed. Good riddance, I am sure they would say. I am sure I would have some fans out there who would be sad but honestly, anyone who could look at me and feel anything positive sickens me.

The second option is that this is a prelude. A prelude to the next stage of my life. A prelude of the public’s expectations of who I, Fa Fumerunner, am. No longer evil – now a herald for all that is just and good. Such a thing won’t be easy but… who am I kidding. How poetic would that be – I become a hero that people idolize. The past is the past and everyone should look to the future, right? I cannot say that will ever be true for me. The only truth is that I am a killer. I am hated. I am loathed. I am berated. My life is closed. The crossroads have an easy path and one that is near impossible to even approach. So difficult that I do know not what the first step should even be, and one that makes me question the very fabric of my reality. I am good now. I have no choice in the matter.

As a child, I made many mistakes as so many do. Then came my first victim and then it all went downhill. After that moment, my soul became truly pure, and, at that moment, I had no choice. I gave myself the illusion of freedom with each soul I took but… could it be that the chains of fate were just as strong back then? The only difference is that people gave me a chance to prove myself, and all I did was prove that I am the worst of the worst.

I had no choice but to be pure evil,

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My soul and life is Wol’zaraths plaything,

I was already cursed let’s be real,

Langnet’s road – the bell that sounded a ring.

Now I am at a crossroads, start or end?

I really am a bad poet at heart,

Time feels slow what message should I send?

Why should I not just play the tragic part?

I swore that only forward I would walk.

I swore that I would not be a coward.

That I would walk the walk and talk the talk.

All because a vision made me soured.

The curse is absolute and I have no end.

Die and a monster my soul will descend.

The choice is clear, there is no choice. If I end it now, I will be turned into something horrifying, and thus a legend of a killer who was secretly a monster will be my legacy. A legacy that only I will know the truth of. A legacy that I want the chance to change. There is one step I must take, one thing I must do to finally show my truth. Show that I am not the danger I once was. One step that my body is physically repulsed by the very thought of. Savra, my partner, my love – you must go. This is the moment. This is the time. Everyone is here and watching. If not now, then when? When I knock myself unconscious, she still manages to stay in my grasp. When I am all alone, she was there, so why should I betray her trust and feed her to the wolves? Drop her into the crowd? What if she is used for killing again!? I know myself; I cannot kill and won't ever again! It would honestly be safer to just hold onto Savra.

Savra blade of mine,

Cruel and twisted is thine twine,

Never shall you dine.

Leaves fall next to cliff,

I raise my hand and it’s stiff,

The hilt has a glyph.

Savra, cruel mistress,

Your fall will be resistless,

You made my life less.

Open hand let go,

Broken land fret even so,

Broken afterglow.

Take a deep breath Fa,

This is impossible, huh.

Are you proud now, Ma?

I squeeze my eyes shut,

No, I must give her a last cut,

Chapters must be shut.

The food was so good.

Love felt magical at last.

I need that again.

A weight lifts from me,

Heart rate drifts sense come to me,

Feels like a new me.

Sounds are muted save for a loud clanging,

Awake or asleep am I, I know not,

Vitality leaves me – is it raining?

Remember the lost, let my soul grow hot,

Am I free or is Wol’zarath feigning?

Interesting, my mind filled with rot,

Senses are merely my soul maiming,

No matter, to my blood she is a clot.

Orchestrating my life must be a sport,

Malevolent work of a twisted mind,

Or perhaps my life was meant to be short,

Redemption is an obtain-less dull grind,

Except… Savra is gone – my last resort!

A beam of light from the setting sun runs down Savra’s blade like a teardrop - the last one that she will shed but only the first of many that I will shed for her. She cries for me and I can do nothing but cry for her. I cannot think or feel. I am helpless now. Savra has fallen far out of my reach and… I see the lead guard walking to the blade. He is picking her up. I jump down, I need to stop him! I need to get to Savra – make sure she is okay! This was a stupid mistake. The world is a spinning blur of colour. Could it be that my life really ends because I fell off a cliff while chasing after the blade that took so many others?

How poetic.

BANG!