[Trigger warning: Violent Anger, Shouting]
5:28 pm
Minyook wanted to visit Jinxi to make sure he doesn't starve himself like he usually does during deadlines, but when he reached, it was more than he anticipated. It was a place of tragedy. The room was bestrewn with canvas and paints. On a normal day, the single room Jinxi rented had an art station and a sleeping area, but today everything was chaos.
The bed was filled with canvases of different colors and pieces. One had florals, and the others had geometric faces. Minyook was weary of the messy room, but only after seeing Jinxi in the far corner did he realize that it wasn't the artistic productivity mess but a helpless disaster mess.
"Hyung! " Minyook called out, hurrying towards him to help him sit up.
JInxi looked like he had gone berserk.
"Get out," Jinxi said, his voice low and rumbling not looking up from where he was curled up. His wild hair and paint-stained hands complimented his red eyes and dark circles.
"I just wanna know if you're okay-" Minyook started, holding his hands out, palm facing Jinxi. He almost looked like a zookeeper approaching a wild animal.
"Do I look okay?" Jinxi laughed sarcastically, "I'm a failure at this."
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"Hyung, you're good. " Minyook said while approaching Jinxi once again, "Don't stress yourself too much. You still have plenty of time to finish your assignment."
"GOOD IS NOT ENOUGH!" Jinxi exploded, throwing the pallet he had near him at the wall.
"Hyung!" Minyook whispered as he stood frozen on spot. He didn't know what to do.
"HOW CAN I SHOW MY PARENTS THAT I'M RIGHT WITH BEING JUST GOOD?," Jinxi kicked the canvas with the flowers and yelled, "THE MOST I CAN DO WITH GOOD, IS THIS SHITTY EXCUSE OF A PAINTING."
"Hyung! Nothing good is going to come out of you destroying things, calm down, let's talk about it."
"NO! I CAN'T CALM DOWN," Jinxi roared again," I've been calm for too long. If I calm down now, I'll never be able to run. I need to run Yook. You won't get it, JUST GO AWAY!"
"Why do you need to run? And to where hyung?!" Minyook shouted back. If he was not getting shit into Jinxi's head by talking, he's gonna get it done by shouting.
"Yook..just go, you won't get it." Jinxi walked towards Minyook to lead him out of the room.
"I might not understand it hyung, but do you realize that the basis of your work is to prove something to someone else?" Minyook points out, backing away from him.
"Song Minyook, what are you trying to say?" Jinxi froze, his cold gaze piercing Minyook's very soul.
"I'm saying whoever you're trying to prove yourself for, has already won at keeping you from succeeding."
"You better shut it. Now."
"You're not using your talent for yourself anymore hyung. You are not working because you like it, nor because you want to do it." Minyook asserts more. He needs to get to Jinxi before he can destroy himself anymore, "As long as you don't understand this, you will never be more than good."
Minyook knew it was a bad move. It was probably the worst move, but he could see the change of glint in Jinxi's eye. Jinxi was still furious, more than furious even, but he got through to him and that's what mattered.
Minyook belatedly realized that he had backed all the way outside of the dorm when Jinxi shut the door in his face. He could hear his heartbeat and heavy breathing. He knew he messed up but also was sure that he did the right thing.
Minyook called Haemin and asked him to come to Jinxi's hostel ASAP. He knows if anyone can handle Jinxi right now, it was Haemin.
His head felt heavy but it seems that was the most he could do for now.