“Guh . . .” I croaked.

I forced my eyes open and saw that the world was still writhing and contorting around me. The wooden beams of the ship’s interior wiggled like snakes in grass and the lantern over my head was splitting into several glowing suns and rejoining before I could finish counting them. I rolled over in my hammock and clutched my stomach in a desperate effort to keep my scarce breakfast down. An intense, shuddering wave of nausea coursed through my body, then finally dissipated after a single unending minute. Agreeing to race against Priss was all fine and dandy, but agreeing to a boat race was proving to be a huge mistake. Vokers are not meant to ride the waves.

“Are you feeling any better, Darni?” asked a voice from behind. It was Sherri. Though my head was throbbing like Geldos himself was beating it with his hammer, I could recognize her voice anywhere.

“I’m dying . . . help me, Bravesreign,” I groaned. I held my arms out and clawed at Bravesreign, which was propped against the wall in front of me and just out of reach.

Sherri rolled me onto my back and loomed over me with a worried expression. “You shouldn’t joke like that,” she said. “Is there anything I can do to help?” I tried to say something, but another wave of nausea reduced my words to a pained gurgle. “Ah, I’ve never seen anyone get seasick like this— how would I even treat it? There might be some bralgee root down in the storeroom but I don’t know if I . . .” She puffed out her cheeks in frustration. “I-I’ll go get the doctor.” She grabbed my blanket, which had fallen to the ground from my tossing and turning, and put it back over me gingerly. After that, she scampered out of the cabin and down the hall in such a rush that she forgot to close the door.

When I say cabin, I mean a communal one, not a personal one. I’d thought Sherri and I would get a room to ourselves, a little small one like we always got at inns, but Captain Kastel told her that we weren’t getting any special treatment on this voyage. That meant we got shoved into the singular women’s cabin with the others. To call it spartan would be generous. It was a long, narrow room with an appropriately long table that ran down the center. On either side were hammocks suspended from hooks on the ceiling and the support beams that dotted the area. Nestled beneath each hammock was a low wooden trunk where you kept your personal belongings. Sherri’s hammock was right next to mine, obviously.

I threw my arm over my eyes and groaned again. “This is the worst. . .” I said.

Would I even be able to finish the race in such a sorry state? Could what I was doing even be called participating? It wouldn’t be anything worth celebrating if I spent the whole voyage groaning in my hammock like some old invalid while everyone else did the work for me. I hadn’t even gotten to watch as we set sail and left Balistag! That was it! No more lying around! I had to start pulling my own weight before it was too late!

I took a deep breath and heaved myself upright. I’d just have to get used to being on a ship, nothing more to it! I stood up and put my hands on my hips triumphantly, then felt the whole world spin around me at lightning speed. Before I knew it was curled up in my hammock again shivering like a freezing infant. I rolled over and whimpered as a flash of intense heat radiated from my face.

“Why am I so stupid . . .” I mumbled to myself.

Geez. Why was I the only one doubled over? At least I’d have some company, a companion in pain, if Sherri had gotten ill too. But no, I had to suffer all by my lonesome in the belly of the ship! I clenched my fists and silently hoped that Priss was feeling just as bad as I was, if not a thousand, no, a million times worse.

“See, I told you! That’s her over there!” came a hoarse whisper from the hallway. I rolled over to face the door and squinted. It was slightly ajar and I could see four eyeballs stacked on top of each other peering through the crack. “Blazing red hair, just like I said!”

“Wow, she’s even prettier than you made her out to be . . .” mumbled a second.

“H-Hey, I think she noticed us!” said a third.

“Nah, she’s as loopy as can be. Lass has weaker sea legs than a freshly born bab,” asserted the fourth. “Saw the captain carrying her across the deck just yesterday.”

“I can hear you, you know!” I shouted. I pointed at the door and bared my teeth like a wolf.

THUD THUMP CRASH

There was an explosion of desperate movement as the four sailors all collapsed on top of each other and fell to the ground in shock. The door lolled open languidly, revealing their ragged forms. Each one was sunburnt and scruffy. They quickly picked themselves up, apologized for intruding, and scampered down the hall and out of sight before I could scold any further them for peeping. They’d better be thankful, because I’d have whacked them with Bravesreign if I hadn’t been in such a sorry state right then! Again, I appreciate the attention, but it’s never acceptable to peep! I closed my eyes and huffed frustratedly. I wondered if Sherri was getting the same treatment.

CREAK PITTER-PATTER PITTER-PATTER

I heard the door open, then the pattering of light footsteps. Far too soft and nimble to be a plodding sailor come to gawk at my beauty. Sherri must have returned with the doctor or some medicine.

“That was fast,” I said. “What did he— Wha—?"

It wasn’t Sherri at all. It was a young guy a bit older than me with rich blue hair tied in a long, thick braid. He was wearing an oversized green robe and a green skull cap, both with black trim. He had on a pair of large, round spectacles that were so thick I could barely see his eyes behind them. Around his neck was a silver amulet, and hanging from his shoulder was a cloth satchel with thick, leafy plants jutting out of it.

He smiled and said, “Hello, Miss Voker. My name is Heize, I’m the ship’s doctor for the time being. Your friend, Sherri, asked me to check on you due to your illness. Would you be willing to accept my aid?”

I grabbed my pillow and threw it at him with all the strength I could muster. It thumped against his face, then slid down his front and slumped onto the ground. “Didn’t anyone ever teach you to knock!? What if I wasn’t wearing any— ugh!” I grabbed the sides of my head and flopped back down. The exertion made my skull reverberate with the pounding of my own frustration.

I looked him up and down as best I could. He was about Sherri’s height, maybe a little taller, and had a pleasant smile on his face. He looked kind of young to be a doctor, but I wasn’t one to talk. I’m sure there were plenty of people who thought I was kind of young to be an adventurer.

“Just— make me feel better . . .” I said. He nodded and reached into his bag, then pulled out a small vial of thick green liquid. “Wait, aren’t you going to do an invocation?”

“Invocations are useful for treating bodily injury, but traditional treatments have their merit when dealing with more— nuanced— ailments,” he said. “Here. A spoonful of this should help soothe your stomach and head alike.” He reached into a pocket on his bag and pulled out a small metal spoon.

“What is it?” I asked with squinted eyes. “You’re not trying to give me anything weird, are you?”

“Loros no!” he said with a raised hand. “It’s simply a balanced mixture of bralgee root, pulst sprout, and shavings from a roasted trombeel mushroom. I devised the recipe myself!” He smiled, closed his eyes, and paused like he was waiting for me to praise him. After a while he opened his left eye, then frowned slightly when he saw that I wasn’t going to. “It soothes dizziness and stomach cramps, but its efficacy varies from person to person. Let us pray that it works for you.” He poured the medicine into the little spoon and held it out towards me. “Now please open up and say ‘ah’”

“I-I can drink it myself,” I said.

He waggled his finger and drew the spoon back.

“If you want me to treat you, you must follow my procedures. Now say ‘ah’ please,” he said sternly.

I scowled at him in hopes that he’d flinch or say he was joking, but those thick glasses of his distorted his eyes so much I couldn’t read them. I scratched my cheek meekly and looked at the medicine. It had little chunks of what I assumed was trombeel mushroom floating in it. If it was all-natural it couldn’t be that bad, right? Right?

This text was taken from Royal Road. Help the author by reading the original version there.

I sighed and said, “Fine. Anything to fix me. Aaaaaaaah.”

He shoved the spoon in my mouth with a smile. “That’s more like it!” he said. The medicine tasted exactly as you’d expect of a crackpot concoction. It was earthy, bitter, and made me scrunch my face into a little knot.

I spat the spoon out and rolled back over as it clattered against the ground. “You’re sure this will cure me?” I asked.

“I make no guarantees, but if it works, it works!” he said. “I’ll check on your again a little later, okay? Your friend is positively flummoxed with worry and I fear she might become ill as well, so I advise you to take it easy and recoup as best you can.” He packed up his things and bowed, then left the room with a jaunty step.

“Weirdo,” I grumbled under my breath.

What had he meant when he said “doctor for the time being” anyway? Did something happen to the real doctor? Was that even medicine that he made me drink? I wouldn’t put it beyond someone to brew up some garbage and pass it off as a miracle tonic. Charlatans in Suryin used to do that all the time, and then guards like my mother would have to run them out of town and order them to never return. I tossed and turned frustratedly, but soon a wave of incredible drowsiness crashed against me. I was out before I could even finish being upset.

* * *

“Darni Voker reporting for duty, sir!” I shouted with a salute and a click of my heels. It was a brand new bright and sunny day, and I was feeling great! Heize may have seemed like a quack, but his medicine did the trick like nothing else!

“At ease!” said Captain Kastel. He rose from his chair with a smile and extended his hand. I grabbed hold of it and yelped as he yanked my arm up and down energetically. “Good to finally have you aboard! You gave us a real scare for a minute there, thought you’d been dragged down to see Opposto! Gya ha ha ha!”

“That’s not funny and you know it, captain!” said Ufie. “You wouldn’t want us joking about you if you got sick!”

“I jest, I jest! Just making light!” said Captain Kastel with a disarming raise of his hands. Anyhow, I’m glad you’re back on your feet, Darni. Here, come with me.” He led me over to Ufie’s map table and placed his finger on the map. “Do you know how to read one of these?”

“Are you kidding? How do you think Sherri and I get around?” I said.

“Just making sure,” he said. “You’d be surprised how ignorant you young folks can be these days. We’re currently here and heading southwest.” He placed his finger next to a wooden figure that was carved to look like my head. The likeness was lacking, but they bothered to model my tiara so they got points for effort. He dragged his finger down and to the left. “We’re heading here to Ophiel Rock. From there we’ll head south by southwest, halfway to the Escaido Isles, until we reach the point where we saw the Prism Palace previously. Are you following me so far?”

I put my hands on my hips and nodded. Was he prepping me to be an assistant navigator? He’d mentioned before that we weren’t getting special treatment, so I assumed Sherri and I would have to work while we were aboard. Sherri would probably get put to work in the kitchen or storeroom, that seemed about her speed, but what would I do? Whatever it was, I hoped it wouldn’t make me sick again.

“The Klazmitz, that’s the Afinsheer girl’s vessel, is currently to our east,” said Captain Kastel. He pointed to a small wooden figure carved to look like Priss’ head. It even had her hair drills and a big frown carved onto it. He turned to Ufie and crossed his arms. “Ufie, when did you last confirm their position?”

“About fifteen minutes ago, sir,” she said. “They were at full sail and speeding along steadily. At our current pace, however, we should reach Ophiel Rock before they do. Their course is oddly wide, and I fear they may be planning to overtake us further down the line.”

“We’ll deal with that when the time comes then.” Captain Kastel turned to me with a smile. “As you can see, we’re doing just dandy! Now, I have another important matter to discuss with you. Come with me.” He started across the bridge, then stopped as Ufie grabbed hold of his coat.

“Captain, are you really going to—” said Ufie before Captain Kastel raised his hand to cut her off.

“Yes, I am,” he said sternly. He shook her off and took another determined step.

“I don’t think you should!” called Jedda from across the bridge.

“Don’t you have a job to be doing?” said Captain Kastel in response.

“Keeping you from making stupid decisions is my job!” replied Jedda with a sardonic grin.

Captain Kastel turned to Nard and frowned. “What say you, Nard? Is it a stupid decision?” Nard looked up from her little blue book and stared at him blankly, then shrugged and went back to reading. “See, Nard agrees with me!”

I looked around, confusion on my face, and scratched my head. “Can someone tell me what this is all about?” I asked.

Everyone looked at me, and everyone but Captain Kastel let out a long, protracted sigh. The Captain himself scurried over to his chair while they were all distracted and pulled out a fancy white box wrapped with a huge blue bow.

“Ahem, as I was saying! I have something to discuss with you, Darni!” said Captain Kastel with a smile. He shoved the box into my hands and put his hands on his hips. “Open it up, if you will.”

“O-Okay,” I said. I was honestly a little bewildered by the whole situation. Was the box going to explode? Did it contain some horrible sight that would be etched into my memory for the rest of my days? Was it part of some stupid hazing ritual? I closed one eye and tugged on the bow, then let it fall to the floor once it was undone. I cracked the box open a little, saw a shimmer of glossy blue, then pulled it apart in one deft motion.

FWOOSH

“Wow,” said Jedda.

“Oh no . . .” said Ufie.

I stood there speechless for a moment shifting my gaze between the fabric in my hands and the captain’s beaming visage. In my hands was a frilly blue and white maid dress made from some of the finest cloth I’d ever touched. It had a short skirt (about as long as my usual miniskirt), a white apron with a huge bouncy bow on the back, and even big puffy shoulders. It was the kind of thing a sleazy nobleman would make his favorite servant wear! I held it up to my body and grimaced when I realized it was made to my exact measurements. I lowered the dress and faked a gracious smile. It’s a skill I’d gained after years of attending balls and galas full of old codgers that would pinch the ear of any child that spoke out of turn.

“T-Thanks, Captain,” I said. The corners of my mouth twitched and jittered visibly as my muscles did everything they could to keep up the façade. “It’s an— amazing— gift, but, uh, what’s it for?”

“Haha! I knew you’d love it!” said Captain Kastel. “And nothing in particular. Just had the darn thing lying around and thought you might be able to get some use out of it.”

Yeah right. There’s no way a dress like that would be “lying around” on a ship when nobody could wear it! He’d had to have had it custom-made within the last day! I shoved the dress back in its box and put my free hand on my hip. It was a bit of a shame that fancy fabric was going to go to waste. I had no plans on wearing the thing.

“Well if that’s all I’ll head back down to—”

Captain Kastel raised his finger and waved it side to side. “Not so fast. There’s one other matter that’d best be settled sooner than later.” He quickly glanced at Ufie and Jedda, who were doing nothing to hide how much they were judging him. “One that’d be better discussed outside the reach of prying ears. Follow me, we’ll talk on the deck.”

The captain cracked his knuckles and exited through the door at the back of the bridge. I exchanged looks with Ufie and Jedda, then followed him down the stairs and out onto the deck. He was waiting for me near the railing and gazing out over the ocean with his hands held behind his back. I walked up next to him and clutched the dress’ box to my chest. Down below I could see The Escallion’s back left wing catching the wind. There was nothing but the glittering expanse of the open ocean in every direction. I wondered how far from the coast we were.

“What did you want to tell me?” I asked after a while.

“Well, it’s plain and clear that this is your first time at sea, and I understand that,” said Captain Kastel. His coat-cape was billowing in the wind. “But you and Sherri are part of the crew while you’re aboard, and that means you’ve got to work like the rest of us! I’ve already assigned Sherri to the fishing crew, though I’ve also got her penned down as a gunner too, should the need arise.” He rubbed his chin, which was now covered in a thin beard. “I’ve been thinking long and hard about what you could do. You haven’t got your sea legs, but you’ve got moxie without end.”

I smiled and nodded. He was a good judge of character!

“You’ve got spirit, like a springtime breeze energizing those around you!” he continued. “Never in my years have I seen such a dazzling display of unbridled youth! I can see it your every move! You’ve laughed, you’ve cried, you’ve struggled against the world to get where you are today!”

I puffed out my chest and triumphantly exhaled through my nose. He was right on the mark!

He raised his fist to the sea and clenched it tightly. “And because of that I want you to share that passion, that uplifting energy with every single member of the crew! Darni Voker, from now until this voyage’s end, you shall be . . .”

He paused and let the lapping of the waves fill the silence. I leaned forward and bounced on my heels expectantly. Why did he have to be so dramatic!?

He turned to me and held his fist out at arm’s length. “. . . The Escallion’s first dedicated stewardess!”

“S-S-S-Stewardess?” I said. I deflated and braced against the railing so I wouldn’t fall over with shock.

A stewardess? Had I heard him correctly? Wasn’t that like a maid, but on a boat? Me, Darni Voker, a maid? Was he crazy!? With my vast array of skills, I could have done . . . something, anything else! I blinked a few times in disbelief, then fell to my knees when he smacked me on the back with a big laugh.

“Gya ha ha ha! Speechless I see! I’m glad you like it!” he said.

I pointed up at him and barked, “You couldn’t think of anything for me to do, could you?” Then I suddenly had a horrible, insidious realization. “Wait a minute— is that why you gave me this dress!?”

He looked down at me sternly, his mouth a perfectly straight, expressionless line, and adjusted his cap so the shadow covered his eyes. After that, he turned away and stared out at the endless sea with his arms crossed.

“Hey! You aren’t being serious, are you?” I said. I jumped to my feet and stepped right up next to him so he couldn’t ignore me. “You really couldn’t think of anything for me to do? Captain Kastel? Captain Kastel!?”

I grabbed him by the arm and shook him while shouting his name, but he remained steadfast and silent through it all like the very picture of a stoic sailor.