> ??? PoV <
“Hey there big guy, back again?” (Bartender)
I nod to the bartender’s greeting. I only visited briefly about three days ago, yet she still remembers me. I’m a bit happy, but it’s probably better if she forgot me. That’s probably impossible though.
“Let me guess, pour out the ale and keep it coming?” (Bartender)
I nod again. I’m glad she’s understanding. It’s awkward not to speak, but it’s even more awkward when I do speak. I sit down and lean my heavy greatsword against the bar. Well, it’s probably a greatsword to most people, for me it’s closer to a longsword.
“Here ya go, just wave me down when you need a refill!” (Bartender)
She hands me the mug and I gratefully accept it with another nod. It’s surprising how much you can get done in this city with just head movements. They must be used to the silent types around here. I’m really lucky I came to this place. No, it would be more accurate to say I'm lucky I found this place when I came here.
*GLUG GLUG GLUG*
Runetap, huh? I’m surprised. This was not what I was expected in the slightest. It’s a good thing though. Good people, although most of them aren’t playing with a full deck of cards. I guess I fit right in then, huh? I raise another silent toast to the idiots who built this place!
*GLUG GLUG GLUG*
Ah, it’s already gone! I wave down the bartender and she gladly refills it without saying anything. At least she’s not judgmental that I’m chain drinking in the afternoon.
* * *
“Welcome back, big guy. Had another good hunt?” (Bartender)
I nod to the bartender girl as I enter her bar again. She’s talking about my adventurer work. I don’t really need to be doing it though. Like, I really don’t. If I wanted money I just need to go hunt down some of the treasure the old me left lying around all over this place. I hunt down the monsters around here as more of a community service thing, even though nobody really asked me to do it. Also, it keeps me busy.
“You’ve been coming here for a full week now, you must really like it here!” (Bartender)
I nod to her again. She’s a good person, her cheerful disposition always lifts my spirits. Way more than the actual spirits. She has a cute freckled face and shoulder-length pale blond hair she keeps tied up in a bun. I wonder why she’s not married yet?
“You’re staring again, you know?” (Bartender)
Ah! Whoops. I got lost in thought. I lower my head and wave my hand in apology.
“That’s okay. At least you don't make rude comments!” (Bartender)
Right, that’s why. Probably didn’t meet anyone decent in this city. This place just doesn’t really attract decent sorts. I nod my head again in response.
“You know, I heard about you from the City Guard.” (Bartender)
Oh there we go. I guess I’ll have to find a new place to-
“No need to be so flustered. They just said you had a loud voice. Is that why you keep your words to yourself?” (Bartender)
I nod again after a brief pause. Right, the City Guard. Weird bunch, but they seem to cope with this location pretty well. I’m surprised they were completely prepared for someone like me, but I’m grateful. Without their help, I’d probably still be rampaging through the countryside.
The bartender girl leans forward puts her elbows on the bar opposite me. She looks up at me with a cheerful expression as always.
“You know, not all adventurers are considerate like you are. Look, the bar’s pretty empty right now, so how about stop worrying about your voice and give me your name? I’m quite curious.” (Bartender)
I glance around, there really aren’t any people around. Just the two guys in the corner, minding their own business.
“Come on, don’t be such a stranger! Tell you what, if you give me your name, I’ll give you mine!” (Bartender)
I drop my shoulders slightly. I can’t deny such an honest request. Truth is, I do want to tell her my name. I want to tell her who I am, where I come from, what I’ve been through. What actually comes out of my mouth is-
TREMBLE IN FEAR, MORTAL FOOL! FOR YOU STAND BEFORE THE GREAT AND MIGHTY ZUBLOS!
“Pfft! Hahaha! What was that!? AH hahahaha! Don’t tell me you seriously, haha, talk like that?! Hahahhahaha!” (Bartender)
Okay. She's not angry at me. That's a start.
> Lara A PoV <
I’m laughing so much I’m in tears! He caught me completely by surprise! I had no idea this is how he really talks! I mean he sure fits the ‘Ancient Evil’ part on the outside, but that over-the-top self-introduction is too much!
“Hahah! Hah. Fuuuu. Sorry, that was rude of me! Haaah, I needed a good laugh. Thanks for that! Zublos huh? Good to finally meet you! I’m Lara! Lara Alamein!” (Lara A)
Oh man that cheered me up! For a moment I forgot all about my problems!
“You know, I really want to thank you. Your patronage helps me out a lot.” (Lara A)
He orders a lot, pays his tab regularly and doesn’t stir up any trouble that results in property damage. Pretty much the ideal customer! Problem is he’s more or less the only such customer.
Zublos nods in response. Looks like my gratitude was accepted. However, this won’t do!
“Oh come now, don’t be like that! It’s a bar, it’s supposed to be a little loud!” (Lara A)
DO NOT PRESUME TO ORDER ZUBLOS AROUND, PETULANT WORM!
“*Snigger* Sorry! I just can’t get enough of those ridiculous lines!” (Lara A)
They’re so over the top, it’s brilliant! Most Ancient Evil things that pop out around here just get sealed, banished or annihilated! I’m glad this one actually tried to reform!
Zublos seemed to brighten up at my incessant giggling! That’s odd to say the least! Normally he should be ticked off for me making fun of his little act! I wonder why he keeps talking like that, though?
“Say, could it be that… you hate speaking normally?” (Lara A)
THE GREAT AND MIGHTY ZUBLOS WILL SPEAK AS HE PLEASES!
He says that, but he’s hanging his head down in shame. Oh! It reminds me of that one drunk who had a purple spot on his neck and kept swearing incessantly when I tried to wake him up! Maybe it's that sort of thing?
“So it’s like a curse?” (Lara A)
Zublos looks back at me. He scratches his head while looking around, then shrugs his shoulders and nods. ‘Close enough.’
“That’s horrible! Why didn’t you go visit the Church of Khamis to get it lifted?” (Lara A)
He puts his arms on the counter and rolls up his sleeves to show me some ornate bracers. Hmm? Aren’t those [Shackles of Eternal Damnation]? I almost didn’t recognize it without the chains! If I remember right, the red ones seal magic completely. So that’s why he carries that huge sword around even though he wears a fancy crimson robe!
“I don’t really understand, but I won’t pry. I’m sure you have your reasons!” (Lara A)
It’s not a good idea to thoughtlessly dig into another’s past. Especially in this city. It goes triple for someone like Zublos. He nods gratefully in response. And resumes drinking his ale.
Come to think of it, he’s the only regular I have these days so I might as well tell him.
“Actually, I’m going to close this miserly bar down next month.” (Lara A)
He blinks at me a few times, looks around the mostly empty place and points at himself questioningly.
“It’s not your fault. This is a city full of better places than mine, there’s no way I can compete with them. I only kept the place going to honor my father’s memory, but sentiment won’t fill my belly.” (Lara A)
It’s a bit backwards to have the customer listen to the bartender’s worries. I guess with this I’m officially disqualified as a bar owner, huh? Ah, now Zublos is hanging his head in disappointment. I should have expected this much.
“Oh come on, don’t be like that. I’m sure you’ll find somewhere else to pretend you can get drunk.” (Lara A)
ZUBLOS HAS NO NEED OF DISAPPOINTING BEVERAGES! ZUBLOS DEMANDS THE OBEDIENCE OF THOSE AROUND HIM!
“Pfft!” (Lara A)
Damn he got me! And just like that the solemn moment we had going disappeared through the window! Hmm? Why is he pointing at me?
“Ah, you’re only here because of me?” (Lara A)
He crosses his arms and nods! I blush a bit since I’m flattered he would say something like that. It does make sense if you think about it. He definitely didn’t stick around for the riveting conversation or the delicious alcohol. Since neither of those things can be found here.
PITIFUL MORTAL! REJOICE FOR I HAVE DECIDED TO GRANT YOU THE GLORIOUS HONOR OF SERVING UNDER ZUBLOS!
… Huh?
* * *
*KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK*
Hmm? Someone’s at the door? It’s already past closing time so I should go send them away. I stop sweeping up the place and shout towards the back room.
“Don’t worry boss, I got it!” (Lara A)
YOU SERVE ME WELL, SLAVE!
Came the immediate reply. I’m glad he’s no longer shy about that way of speaking, although the people he hired found it a bit awkward at being called SLAVE all the time. It only lasts until they realize he actually means to say ‘valued employee.’
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I open the door slightly and peek my face through the crack.
“I’m sorry, but the Vestiges of-” (Lara A)
“Lara! I’m sorry for disturbing you so late, but I need a big favor! Is your boss here?!” (Clara)
“Oh! Hey Clara, come in! He’s around back!” (Lara A)
“Thanks. Actually you should come too, I might need your help.” (Clara)
“Sure!” (Lara A)
I close and lock the door, then guide her to the back. I’m supposed to be just a waitress, but since I’m the one who understands the boss the most I end up being an interpreter a lot of the time. Like earlier this afternoon with that delightful group of four! Those two little girls were particularly adorable!
At first I was apprehensive about Zublos’s cake shop idea - using alchemical reagents in regular cooking sounded dangerous! But turns out that he’s really good at it! The amazing taste and novelty of his creations attracted so many customers that we became almost an overnight success! It’s hard to believe this place was that same seedy bar from a few weeks ago!
We reach the office in the back and I poke my head inside. Seems the boss is doing some paperwork, but he pauses to glance up at me.
“It was Clara, she needs a favor! It seems urgent!” (Lara A)
THE RUTHLESS AND TERRIBLE ZUBLOS WILL HEAR OUT THIS PATHETIC WRETCH AND HER FEEBLE REQUEST
Heh, that was a good one. Clara basically storms into his office after hearing that colorful ‘show her in.’
“Zublos! I need your help! Me and several of my friends need to leave for the Capital immediately, but there’s no available adventurers to hire as escorts on such short notice! Please, I’ll make sure you’re well compensated, so be our escort!” (Clara)
Wow, she really does seem desperate. It may be a two-week round trip, but it shouldn’t be a problem. We do owe Clara a lot for her help. Zublos may have had the money to buy and start his own business, but the web of laws and regulations was a nightmare! Clara patiently guided us through the process so it went much much smoother than it would have otherwise. I guess her position as a guild receptionist in the ‘City of Paperwork’ isn’t just for show!
IN LIGHT OF YOUR MEAGER ASSISTANCE TO THE CAUSE OF ZUBLOS, I SHALL PERSONALLY SEE TO THIS MEANINGLESS TASK!
“Thank you! Thank you so much! Although, are you sure the shop will be okay?” (Clara)
Zublos looks at me and tilts his head. I guess I should be the one explain properly, huh?
“It’s fine, Clara! The waitresses and assistant chefs can handle the day-to-day. They’ll be fine if we leave for a few weeks! The boss treats his workers really well, so each of us is doing our best every day!” (Lara A)
It goes double for me though. It may not be exactly what my father wanted, but I’m still honoring his wish. ‘A place where people can forget about their troubles for a day’ is what he wanted to leave behind. I’d say Zublos is doing a much better job at it than I was, though…
“Also, the boss wanted to visit the capital anyway to take care of a few things, so it’s actually a good opportunity!” (Lara A)
“I see, I see! That makes me feel a lot better for springing this on you... How much time do you need to get ready?” (Clara)
I glance back at the boss. He’s already equipping himself with the luxurious robe and heavy greatsword he keeps in the corner. I turn around to face Clara and let her know.
“Seems he’s all set to go immediately!” (Lara A)
The boss taps me gently on the shoulder. I look up at him and he tilts his head towards the door.
“Wait, I’m coming too?” (Lara A)
He nods.
* * *
Well, it was a bit sudden, but it makes sense. Those stuck up people of the capital have no way they’ll understand what Zublos is really trying to say. In the end we’re escorting a stagecoach with about 5 or so girls crammed inside. I'm one of them, though.
“Alright everyone! We’ll stop here for few hours!” (Coachman)
The coachman shouts at us from outside the stagecoach. Clara pokes her head through the window and shouts back at him
“You’re sure we can’t keep going?! It’s still daylight!” (Clara)
“Horses need rest, young lady. The fact we actually left in the evening has thrown their sleep cycle out of whack. Don’t worry, we’re still ahead of schedule as promised.” (Coachman)
“... Sorry. Thanks for your hard work.” (Clara)
I glare a bit at Clara as she takes her seat again. I don’t care how much of a fan you are, but pushing people around so you can be several hours ahead of time is beyond selfish! That girl’s devotion to her idol is downright creepy! I should have asked about the reason for this ‘emergency’ a lot sooner!
Well, we’re already 2 days into the trip so it’s pointless to turn back now. At least the road is fairly new and flat so the ride is rather comfortable.
The carriage stops by the side of the road and we file out, stretching our limbs. I go to where Zublos is. Since he keeps pace with the horses on foot, he must be tired.
“Good job today as well, boss. You have a good nap, okay?” (Lara A)
He nods and quietly climbs inside the now empty carriage. His stamina may be formidable, but it’s not bottomless. Even if he claims he can keep going for a week without rest, I won’t let him! With his personality he’d collapse from overwork in no time!
I huddle around with the rest of the passengers as they start a campfire and prepare lunch. Eventually the small talk turns to their idol, an adventurer named Ellie. They all seem to really enjoy talking about her, but I just keep out of it.
“I wonder how she maintains that healthy hair of hers? It’s always shiny and glossy whenever I see it!” (Fangirl 1)
“Don’t you know? She regularly buys shampoo from that [Green Sage]!” (Fangirl 2)
“Really? Maybe I should give it a try, too.” (Fangirl 1)
“You’ll have a good opportunity, he’s going to arrive the day after we do along with the rest of the club.” (Clara)
“That’s great! I wonder if he some of her hair dye as well…” (Fangirl 1)
“Ellie’s hair is naturally blue though. There’s no way hair dye is that luscious in color!” (Fangirl 3)
Hmm? Blue hair? Wasn’t that the-
*GRRRRR*
I hear a low growl. Judging from the faces of the other girls, it’s not just me! I turn towards the treeline and see a whole pack of gigantic wolves emerge! There must be dozens! One leaps right at me with an open jaw!
“NOO! HEEE-” (Lara A)
*SMASH*
*YELP!*
“-EELP... me?” (Lara A)
I closed my eyes and screamed in a panic! But a weird noise was heard! I open my eyes and instead of a wolf, I find a massive wall of red.
YOU PUNY MONGRELS DARE TO CHALLENGE ZUBLOS?! KNOW THAT YOUR ANNIHILATION IS ASSURED!
...
DIE, WEAKLINGS!
...
When I come back to my senses, the wolves are already dead or fleeing. Looking around, the other girls already retreated to the carriage. The door was ripped clean off its hinges! What? Wasn't he sleeping?! When did he get all the way over here?
IS MY MINION SO PATHETIC AS TO BE BESTED BY THAT WORTHLESS TRASH?
Zublos is now standing next to me, looking down at my barely standing self.
“I’m… fine… you! You aren’t! You’re bleeding!” (Lara A)
How horrible! He has a huge gash on his forearm! His robe is torn and getting damp around the wound! He just glances at it and shrugs his shoulders!
SUCH A MEAGER SCRATCH COULD BARELY BE CONSIDERED A WOUND!
“But- That is- That was- *Sniffle* I WAS SO SCAARED! WAAAAA!” (Lara A)
I hug him across his stomach and bury my crying face in his robe! It was a wolf! It was huge! IT HAD TEETH AND WANTED TO EAT MEEEE! THIS IS WHY I NEVER WANTED TO LEAVE THE CITYYY!
*Pomf*
Hm? What’s with this huge thing on my head? Somehow… I feel... reassured. Safe. Like I’m inside the world’s castle wall. I open my damp eyes and look up. I see, he's slightly tussling my hair with his enormous hand.
I FIND YOUR LACK OF FAITH DISTURBING, MINION! THE GREAT AND POWERFUL ZUBLOS DOES NOT SUFFER ANY MISGUIDED FOOLS WHO COVET HIS BELONGINGS!
“Heh! *Sniffle* Thank you.” (Lara A)
He says some good things. Hmm? What did he call me since a while ago?
...
I don’t quite understand why, and I know it’s crazy but… somehow being promoted from SLAVE to MINION made me feel really happy!
----------------------------------------
This side story was partially inspired by Krieg.