Galen Vesa
I think I took a nap somewhere between the lizard trying to bisect her precious dolt and giving me an earful for all the bloody things I did. Although, she did use a different expression. One that can make the ears burn, even in a dolt like me. Anyway, the things she was accusing me of were the tip of a dolty iceberg, so I made a tactical retreat and passed out.
Waking up the next morning I found myself propped against a bald rock with my toes dipped into a pond of crystal water which did not bode so well for the said water since my toes were hard at work, turning the water around them into a black sludge. To put it mildly, I think I am quite yucky, and it shows. And smells. Skipping several shower breaks and self-combusting can do that too people.
“You took your time.”
The lovely voice I missed so much rang in my ears instead of within my mind. While an odd change I must confess I much prefer to hear that annoyed tone compared to tinnitus. As for my tardiness, well, she did wring me out like a rag yesterday and my insides still had some trouble coping with it or so the mild taste of blood in my mouth told me.
Something I best not mention. No point in unhinging a dragon no matter how small and cute she looks.
Although, for such a tiny dragon her arms held enormous power and her biceps were nothing to scoff at. Kinda, too well developed for a child her size. So much so I would even go as far as calling her ripped but alas, my own amazing body had no intention of following my orders, so instead of bantering with my athletic dragon I just drooled a little. Well, I drooled a lot. I drooled while gazing crosse eyed in her general direction. The muscles in my jaw weren’t in any better shape than the rest of my body so it just hung there, causing a drool-fall.
Overall, a perfect dolto-esque-view.
About five feet from me, Erta scoffed and busied herself with handstand pushups, making it look so easy and effortless. I have no idea how many she already did but, judging by her sweat pooling around her hands, the answer would be “a lot”.
“I have stopped counting after about a thousand. You were fast asleep for quite a while, so I found myself a more productive endeavor than watching you make snot bubbles as you snored.”
Huh? Wait a minute… How did that ancient pipsqueak know?
The pipsqueak in question paused mid pushup and looked at me.
“Our minds are still bound, dolt. I can hear you quite well. A pipsqueak, you say? How rummy.”
Seems like she forgot to mention that little tidbit yesterday. Well, there goes my privacy. No more badmouthing the lizard behind her back. Just when I got used to it.
“Was that supposed to be a joke or is my dear dolt thirsting for my attention? Also, have I not asked you not to call me that? It is degrading. I am as much a lizard as you are a chimp.”
As she spoke, a mental image of what kind of attention she was referring to just so happened to enter my mind and, um, you know, with her out in the real world, that may hurt. Even me.
Oh, mighty dragon! This poor and uneducated, drooling dolt shall behave! Me promise. As much as it’s worth.
“Smart boy.”
Erta smiled and went back to her pushups. Her smile… let’s just say that kids can be quite the creepy creatures. No wonder child monsters are so popular in horror movies and pop culture.
And she looked like one.
I mean she looked like a child, not a monster. A teenage girl to be exact. An odd amalgamation of her old self I met in my inner world and my bouncy, perverted elven visage. Both forms combined and compressed to the guise of a child. A child with some insanely chiseled muscles for her small stature.
A child that would use some clothing. And I bath. Even with my useless nose, I could smell her from ten feet away. It wasn’t a blarg level stench yet, but she was getting there with each repetition she made, and each drop of sweat exerted by her skin pushed her aroma a notch higher.
“A pot calling the kettle black. You are no bed of roses yourself, dolt. I’m sure a blarg or two would steer clear if they caught a whiff of your peculiar eau de burnt dolt. Is that not true miss oops-I-did-misplace-my-wardrobe-yet-again?”
Touche.
Not taking her eyes off me, Erta did this fancy thing with her legs, I mean while standing on her hands she put her right foot on the ground then using her left leg as a counterbalance, did a sort of flip and was up and walking towards me.
“Your wounds seem to have healed. Does it still hurt?”
Not that I know of. Can’t really tell unless I start leaking again.
“Good.”
She said, and with just a little help from her leg I found myself at the bottom of the pond which my feet were trying to turn black but a minute ago. Dumb dolt and his dumb mouth.
You know, kicking a defenseless dolt around is kind of cruel.
Do not dramatize, there is no more than a foot of water in there.
Not much of a difference if you can’t move. What did I ever do to deserve this?
You ask? I do believe I saw something about a baseball bat in your recent memories. Or was it a golf club?
Oh, that… Em…
Not finding a smart thing to say, I did a mental tee-hee-hee and focused on letting bubbles out of my nose. Burble, burble…
I believe Erta scoffed at my outstanding performance and shaking her head went back into the cave I woke up in. Hopefully to get some clothing. It would be bad if my propensity to misplace or explode my wardrobe did rub off onto her.
Um… What are the chances of that happening? Right? Best not to temp my luck thinking about it.
Anyway, from the soft warmth seeping out of her mind I guess I could say she was happy even if she showed it in her own way. For starters she could have dumped me into a frigid river and not a hot spring. So, profit, I think.
Burble, burble, burble…
Well, since I haven’t drowned so far, I guess it’s safe to say that my blessings are still working. At the very least the one Water left is still there. Something I cannot say about the troublemakers themselves. They kept away and eerily silent. Not that I complain about their lack of attention towards their favorite snack but if the spirits kept their distance, they had a reason to do so. Not a good one most of the time.
Burble, burble…
Hmm, I’m starting to see some light pierce through the black sludge surrounding my body. Seems like whatever could come off on its own did come off and now I’m left with the layer that must be removed by the good old scrubby-scrubby way.
Burble?
Patience my dolt. You want to soak off that crust and let the water clear first. Besides, no way in hell I am getting into that black soup you just made.
Truth be told, I fully support her sentiment. There were chunks of, well, me, flaking off my body and floating about. I think I should be happy that underneath all this gunk I had fresh pink skin instead of, well, other bloody bits making this dolt.
Burble…
I entertained myself by letting air bubbles out of my nose and watching them rise while the lazy current cleared the little pond. That is, until the air in my lungs ran out. Then I just stared at the mirror like surface. I still don’t get how it works. Between the enchantments put on my body and the spirit magic, I can just breathe, even without an ounce of mana in my veins. Odd. That wasn’t the case before. I almost drowned back at that sunken ship.
You have gills you fish brain. They do not need mana to work.
Huh? Well, now that I think of it, it does feel like something is flopping in my chest. Some sort of a valve? Hmm, when I inhale, it opens, I think. At the same time, I can sense some odd tightness in my sides. Then on exhale there’s that squeezing sensation just under my throat and a weird current tickle my arms.
That’s kind of cool, I guess. Wait a minute, do gills work in hot water?
With these four meddlers involved? Dolt, do I need to answer that?
Em, yeah. As would my teacher say, Ye who mingles with spirits, abandon all logic. So, I could breathe? Cool. How did those gills get there when I wasn’t transformed? That’s a mystery for another day. A day that won’t come anytime soon.
Considering the amount of ink like water gushing out of me with each exhale I made, my insides were in no better shape than my outside. Oh well. At least the water is getting cleaner now.
Never thought that fancy fishtail form would come in handy, time and time again.
With her dolt sufficiently cooked and the water cleared, Erta pulled me out of the pond and splayed my limp body on a large flat rock where she began scrubbing her steaming dolt while I focused on playing a cooked noodle and leaking water from various places. As they say, what goes in must come out. One way or another.
Ignoring this world’s idea of soap, which was a coarse mixture of sand, oils, herbs and fruit juice that clearly removed gunk alongside a layer of my skin, I endured her care. I’d lie if I were to say that I didn’t enjoy the experience. To be precise, Erta did enjoy it and her mood did in part rubbed off on me. She found a good dose of pleasure in scrubbing my anorectic ass. For reasons only known to herself. She even giggled when she flipped me over like a pancake and started working on my front.
“What?”
Nuh-thin. Nuh a thing.
I sent a thought at her blushing face and looked away at the bright sky above us. Best not to pry at some things.
“We used to bathe together every day when Shelia was a child. Sometimes more than once. Back then she was a playful little dirt sponge. Leave her out of sight for a moment and she was gone gods know where only to return smeared in monster dung and entrails. And every time I had to catch that squirt and wash her. Truly, she would rather fight monsters than face the soap. But it was something we did together. Sometimes even fun.”
The narrative has been taken without authorization; if you see it on Amazon, report the incident.
Done with my bath and her tale, Erta shoved me back into the water.
Burble, burble, burble…
From beneath the surface, I saw her lather and scrub herself. I thought she was just letting go of her steam on my anorectic ass for all the dumb things I did but, she wasn’t any gentler with her own skin. Is that what people call being lost in their own thoughts?
Something on your mind?
No.
Ah, such a blazing fast answer. My lizard-is-spewing-bull sense is tingling.
Erta’s fist stopped an inch away from my stomach. I’m sure that hit would have landed if I wasn’t half cooked and recovering. As it was, the force of her fist only splashed all the water out.
So, what is it?
With the water gone I could gaze at her face and see she held by a thread, her red eyes ready to go flooding again. Ah the famous dragon mood swings.
“Dolt, I do not know why you brought me back but never, ever do that again. Do not sacrifice yourself for me. I beg you. My heart will not stand watching my loved ones die for my sake. Never again.”
Loved ones? This dolt is sorry for not having realized it sooner that he is considered… valuable.
“Oh, shut up! Shut up, just shut up.”
There she goes, tears and snot dripping off her freshly washed face.
Oy don’t fall apart on me. That’s my spiel. Falling apart. Besides, all I had to do is to get married.
Well, that wasn’t working. Time for heavy artillery.
Want a hug?
“…yes.”
Umm, body? Move, will ya? Arms? Eh. Still nothing.
Say, if you don’t mind having a DIY hug, um, here’s your chance.
She gave me one of those looks but at least my attempt at humor dampened her sobs. And she did claim that hug. Propping me against a rock, she climbed onto my lap and with her head resting against my pillows, she wrapped herself in my arms.
We sat like that, waiting for our pond to refill with fresh water.
So, about what you said?
“Do not push your luck, dolt. I misspoke.”
Right, you did sis. You got my whole spleen, so, spleen sis? Or if we go by seniority, should I call you elder sister? Elder spleen sister?
“Dolt?”
Hmm?
“Shut. Up.”
Yes, ma’am.
Minding my own business and staring up at the sky, I sat in silence while the water lazily refilled our pond.
“Do you think she will talk to me?”
Ah, the all-familiar and paralyzing fear of action. I haven’t felt that in years. Hmmm, thinking of it, I can’t say I ever felt it. However, my snotty nosed lizard began to show signs of fear and reluctance now that she knew where her child hid. It was one thing to look for her child while having little chance of finding her and wholly another to confront her estranged offspring. Especially if she caused whatever fractured their relationship. I think?
No idea. I’m not the best source of information when it comes to that kind of thing. You won’t know until you try it.
Erta took that in with a sigh.
“Are you sure that overgrown weed is watching over her?”
As much as she can without causing suspicions. Cora did give her word. You two may hate each other but I think she understands your concerns. She knows that kind of pain.
“I see.”
I could sense the growing worry in her heart.
Would you like us to go together? I can’t say I am too thrilled to be back in the capital. You know, getting married and stuff. Eventually, I will have to go and fulfil the contract I signed to get you out of my head but with the twiggy doing a good job of standing in for me I believe taking a detour through Fenira should not be an issue. Anyway, I enjoyed the place and the people there. Well, maybe not that damn serpent. Her I could do without.
“Thank you.”
You’re welcome roomie. Well, ex-roommate. You’ve been evicted.
I would wink at her if I could, but I think Erta did get my joke. She rolled her eyes and leaned back, squashing my pillows.
You do remember these are not pillows?
“That is your issue now dolt, not mine.”
She smiled at me, sticking out her tongue and patted her own flat chest. It’s going to be a while before anything starts growing there. That’s so unfair.
To rub salt into a would, she continued.
“Well, I must say, this is quite comfortable. Much better than sleeping on the ground and since you are not going anywhere, I might as well just nap for a bit. Or we could catch up on the dumb things you did. So? Who did you bang to get that fancy spell? Another spirit? A god?”
I did not ‘bang’ anyone nor do I intend to. All I did was sign a paper marriage and agreed to be someone’s guardian until she comes of age.
“That cannot be all there is to it. Let me see those juicy memories of yours… oh my.”
I felt her rummaging inside my head while she grinned at me with a grin only a dragon could make.
“Was the emperor as good a kisser as they say he is?”
Hey! That’s… That’s dolt abuse!
“Might makes right. I take what I want.”
Yeah? Just you wait. I’m sure you are bound to inherit those gargantuan milk jugs and then...
“Dolt?”
Yes?
“Be a good quiet pillow and let me watch before I invent a new and exciting way to make you quiet.”
Yes, ma’am.
“Good boy.”
She patted my knee and began browsing through all the dumb things I did since Rooth kicked her out of my mind.
It’s good to have you back Erta.
“…Thank you.”
She whispered, ever so softly and being the good dolt I am, I pretended not to hear it.
After a while Erta indeed dozed off yet even then her small hands were still grabbing onto my arms. Through the weird link still binding our minds I sensed how tired she was. Day by day she must have worked her new body right up to exhaustion. Even now the familiar twitching of her little frame told me it was trying to knit itself together. Fix what she damaged by abusing her strength.
All that while I could do nothing but blink. With difficulty.
Not good. It’s been over a day since I woke up and my mana hadn’t shown any signs of coming back. Even the enormous life tree stuck inside me and the dryad’s forest surrounding it felt dormant. Speaking of the annoying twiggy, while she too avoided me for some reason, I could smell her core somewhere in there. A rich aroma. Something like the scent of a forest right after a storm with undertones of pine sap, wet soil and moss.
That was when I noticed something.
Strolling around the life tree inside me, I came across the line of runes circling the entire place. Luck wanted I stepped on it. Oops.
The sensation I got kicked me out of my inner world and back into the steamy pond where we were still soaking our butts. Although my freshly reborn lizard appeared awake now. Perhaps woken by the same jolt that kicked me out of my inner space?
Um, Erta?
“What is it, dolt?”
She answered unhurriedly after fixing my arms around herself.
You remember that spell thingy the witch used to put together this wet dream body of mine? I think something wonky is happening with it.
That stirred her. Erta turned around and pressed her cheek against my dragon heart. Whatever she was doing it caused her to spurt a litany of quite impressive adjectives from her dragon’s tongue.
“The spell matrix that witch put on your body is failing.”
She extracted herself from my embrace and picked me up. A teenager carrying a grown woman in a princess carry. That’s an odd sight. Also, while not exactly fear, I felt a sense of urgency coming out from her.
What’s going on?
“You need mana, and you need it now. Your body won’t last long without it.”
Eh? Why? We’ve been through so many burnouts already and that never posed any issues. I just have to sleep it off until my mana returns.
“Not like this. Not in a place like this. Before, your body would siphon the ambient mana to compensate for its depleted supply. Here? There is nothing to siphon here and will not be for years to come.”
Huh? Then why aren’t you affected as well? Weren’t you the one who told me that people of this world can’t live without mana?
“We are different dolt. We can exist without mana yet while, due to your contribution, I was reborn in a body that can exist without a drop of magic, your current body was cobbled together by an insane lunatic. She joined parts of many creatures into one being and held it in unison with that matrix. Thus, even though your heart would not stop without mana, your entire body exists against nature. The moment that spell fails, nature will oppose your very existence.”
That does not sound good.
“Dolt, in your world there are those people that take parts of one person and put them in another to heal them.”
You mean a doctor performing an organ transplant?
“Yes. You do remember what happens when a body refuses to work with the new part?”
Transplant rejection… Are you trying to tell me that matrix works as a rejection suppressant?
“In a crude simplification, yes. In truth it does more but its main purpose is keeping your body in one piece.”
Alright, I need mana. So, what now?
“The ritual you performed sterilized this island. These grounds are as close to your world as it is possible in this plane of existence. It will take years for magic to permeate this place once again. We need to get you somewhere you can gather mana.”
With that said, this damn lizard ran off to somewhere at a brake neck speed while holding a screaming dolt. Well alright, I am in no state to be screaming and my mind seldom does fear. So, it was more like Erta ran, and I played a limp noodle in her arms. Drooling.
“Not here either… I thought that maybe sea water would have some mana in it, but it seems this place is so deprived that it sucks all the waves dry well before any of them reach the beach. Perhaps… “
And off again she was running, this time along the beach, kicking off sand with each step she made.
“Here… this should be close enough…”
We came to a sudden stop at a point jutting out into the sea and away from the island’s rocky cliffs.
She bit her lips and turned back towards the cliff but just as I thought we would be climbing back where we came from, Erta turned around again then dashed towards the water.
“Don’t come back until your mana at least liquify!”
Huh?
And she jumped before I managed a word of protest. We sailed at least a hundred yards or more over the waves then just before we could hit the water, the darn lizard spun around in the air and tossed me. I ragdolled through the air for another whole minute before my face kissed the waves, causing me to skip several times over the surface.
And then I sank.
A bit anticlimactic, what can I say. Well, the lizard could always choose to try to solve her issues by dropping me into a volcano instead of tossing me into the sea so, perhaps a quick swim wasn’t such a bad outcome?
Burble, burble, burble…
Still unable to move I hit the sandy bottom in a jumble of limbs and stayed there with my face scraping the sand. Can’t say I saw that coming…
Stop complaining and gather mana before the current can push you back!
Easier said than done but anyway, I did what Rooth taught me and tried to focus on the fleeting sensation somewhere at the edge of my mind. That odd woosh thing that’s akin to having a fifth limb should be there for the taking but, hmm. How odd.
Erta, there’s nothing here. I can’t detect a damn thing.
Instead of her snarky comments only silence met me.
Erta?
Whether she was busy, or I just didn’t have enough juice to reach her, I got no response to my queries. I thought about trying to sense her presence but without any magic within her new body she wouldn’t be visible and beside I sucked at that anyway so, I closed my eyes letting the current push me this and that way while I did my best to hunt for mana.
Burble, burble…
It was vague. It was weak. It was far, far away but after gods know how long, I sensed something. It felt as if somebody was calling me. Screaming their throat out just to get my attention. A familiar voice. I focused all my efforts on reaching to this odd call.
…Found!
The presence hit me akin to a freight train as it came screeching while invisible claws dug into my body, dragging my limp shell somewhere at an increasing rate. I was about to protest when I hit the border, the edge of the burned-out land and, gods! I screamed, or I would if countless tons of water weren’t squeezing me from every direction.
Then I… Oh gods…
It felt as if all the world’s mana tried to squeeze inside me all at once. As if trying to push the entire universe through a pinprick hole. For a fraction of a heartbeat my entire body lit up like a supernova. And then, um … I… um… I shall not speak of what transpired. Least be said the mana felt content to be back and I was… I… well it was pleasant. Let’s leave it at that.
Galen! Galen?!
As strength slowly returned to my body so did the frantic voice of a certain lizard that though it was a clever idea to toss her dolt away into the frigid ocean.
I’m fine. I think.
I’ve sent my thoughts to the scaredy dragon screaming in my head while I waited for my butt to stop glowing and blinding me. Just the afterglow of whatever transpired was enough to light up the ocean around me for several miles.
The giggling mana ‘got me’ alright. Nothing to worry. I hope.
You mean…
Yeah, the thing’s back. A portion of it at least.
A Saturn sized portion glowing akin to a sun. It was doing something to my inner forest.
Give me a minute, I think I might be able to move soon.
Well, it took a bit longer than soon before I regained my control over this scrawny wet dream and since I was wet already, I decided to go native and swapped my overgrown pillows for my streamlined fishy form. To my pleasant surprise, the transition worked without issues. Now, where is that lizard?
Floating about, I raised my right hand and focused on my spirit compass, wiling it to show me my way to that sniffling dragon. An arrow formed and pointed somewhere behind me so, kicking away with my magnificent fin I followed where the compass led me. It took a while to get back, but I found the dragon near the border of the burned-out zone where no mana could gather. The parched place swiftly absorbed all incoming mana.
Erta?
Here.
Huh? What are you doing? Is there something there?
She kept on sinking to the bottom, about twenty feet under the surface, where she pushed herself up and away, strong enough to eject herself about ten feet above the water. Then she fell back in and the cycle repeated itself. I swam over to her and watched as she gripped her nose while sinking. As cute as it was, that wasn’t something to stare at. I pulled her into my arms letting her grab onto my neck and I took us back up to the surface.
Phuaaa!
She really did gasp for air with that famous Phuaaa sound I thought one could only find in books or anime.
“Aside from playing toss the dolt into the ocean, what were you doing?”
“Swimming.”
Said the out of breath dragon, snorting water out of her nose.
“Aha. Sure. Swimming. This must be the famous drowning dragon style swimming?”
“It worked.”
Erta grinned then proceeded to hork out all the salt water she swallowed. Well, I just floated in place and let her do her thing, ignoring the fact that some of it landed on my back.
“Take us back to the beach.”
She ordered.
“Hmm? What about you? Want me to take you further away where there’s mana?”
“No, not yet. I want to develop this body a bit more before I get any mana involved.”
“If you say so.”
Letting her ride atop me, I swam to the shore.