"If you die in the game, you die in real-" Before another word could be finished, player D_Ink went flying out the courtyard, flashing past an exposed wall.
"Okay so do an accelerated backhop and 360 away from the Gms cause their dicks, then-" He pauses to look behind himself as he goes flying through the air. "Try to find a body of water at least 12" deep, it seems to negate fall damage, you can tell based on the hue,"
Amidst those panicking in the face of the announcement, people watched aghast as he simply flew through the air of SAO on a Livestream. For some reason, Cardinal did not attempt to ban D_Ink. After some pestering from Twitch chat, he simply told them that he wasn't going forward. He was simply sitting down, and Cardinal functioned based on what he was thinking. So if he wasn't cheating in his head, Cardinal thought he wasn't cheating.
"Now, once you land in the water do a dash-boost up this wall,-" he smacked his avatar against the wall, flying to the sky of the first floor. "Now what you want to do here is strafe right above this tree with the pinecone on its a branch. Make sure you also have the basic sword equipped. Now, half a second before you hit the apex of your jump, dequip all your equipment and sheath your sword. This freezes your momentum at whatever the average of the last 5 seconds allowing you to just barely manage the floor 1 skip."
As he lands, players back in the square are still panicking, with some people starting coming to their senses. As the residents stare at D_Ink, attempting to comprehend where he came from, he sighs and continues talking.
"Okay so most of the time I would spend the money I have on a round shield to hop past the first battle via clip launch, but this time I'm actually gonna battle the boss for the experience points since I need to get stat points to do the sudden STR overload glitch." Turning his head, he looks around for a specific person. After a black haired resident appears, D_Ink charges at him and jumps on his head, starting an accelerated backhop off the rooftops of the second-floor buildings.
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"So like, the thing is... The edge geometry on the ceilings isn't actually smoothed out or anything, so you can actually surf like in CS if you feel like it." He then demonstrates it, flying off the edge of the roof into the sky. "But it isn't really useful for this strat, so I won't be doing it till floor 23." As he flies through the air, he spots a rock directly below him and throws his remaining armour at it.
"Okay so now this rock has a really interesting quirk to it. If an object interacts with it, it resets the geometry in such a way that the game thinks for half a second that it's the default surface, which was dirt because it was used a lot. Because of this, it's edge geometry resets, and-" He lands on the dirt, sliding off and jumping off the ground only to go roughly mach speed, in a completely straight line."I can do this." As he approached the treeline with the ground nowhere near him, his viewers grow anxious.
"Ok so this part is a bit difficult since I don't have the cloak, but, if you hit the trees with the lower half of your kneecap they send you flying in a random direction. Now if it launches us up, we just have to find a hole in the edge boundary. If launches in a random direction I might have to sacrifice a piece of armour to change directions." As he hit's the tree, he gets sent flying straight towards the ground.
"Alright this is fine, I can redirect myself with that bush. If you didn't know, bushes in Sao actually have really weird edge geometry because of how raytracing works. I can't really explain it, but basically, if the sun is shining on the leaves, they get constantly updated every minute." Bringing up his system clock, he counts the seconds.
"Alright so I'm about 3 seconds early, but if I dash early my position logic is reset and I hit a delayed version of the bush which makes it a lot easier to time it-" He goes flying off the bush and into the sky. "Now the thing is, I do actually have to sleep eventually or the system forces me to take debuffs. So, a cool trick is stasis flight. Since I'm actually going pretty slow, I can take about a nap while I fly across the second floor. Anyway, guys, I'm D_Ink, and we're about to speedrun our first complete and utter violation of our human rights. Bye!"