(Warning: Crude sexual language used in humourous context. Also contains some discussion of sexual morals.)

Alas, it was not so easy as that.

As of the moment that I told Ariadne to summon Kerrass, he was actually several days away. This might sound like a lot. Those people among you that have spent any time looking for Angraal on a map will know that it's not that large as Dukedom's go. Certainly not compared to those more famous Duchy's of Toussaint, The Redanian Duchy of the Pontar and The Temerian Duke of the same as examples. But there is something that you should know when it comes to raw, travelling over ground in times of heavy weather.

Take the amount of time that it would normally take for you to travel that distance by horseback on good roads and presuming no other factors. Bandits, sickness, availability of food etc. Ok, now if it's raining, double that amount of time. You will have started late due to the fact that you will not have slept well during the night and it's always harder to get started in the morning when you are tired, cold, damp and have a cold coming on. Which you will have. And that's just for rain.

But we weren't dealing with Rain. We were dealing with snow at the height of winter. So what does that do to the typical travelling times. Well, take that original figure and multiply it by a factor of ten. That is not an exaggeration.

Why does it take so long?

Those of you who are working on following my example and travelling the world looking for causes to take part in, monsters to slay and people to rescue, then take note of this.

The first thing is that you can't plan to sleep in the open. It is not a condition where you can just choose a patch of ground, wrap yourself up in a blanket, or your cloak, pillow your head on your saddle and go to sleep. That's not how these things work. For a start, just sleeping in the open like that is a death sentence. You need to find some kind of shelter. If you are travelling in Wilderness, then this means that you must find a shepherd's hut, a family that are willing to take you in, or you must build your own shelter. I haven't got the first idea how this is done, but apparently you have to build yourself a little hut made out of branches, wood, mud and impacted snow. It has to be big enough to contain a fire. Because in this kind of environment, in these conditions. Cold means death.

Don't think about the Horse, if you are really doing this kind of thing then it's just a matter of praying that your horse survives until morning. Which it probably won't. There is a reason that horses, cattle and the like are stabled and herded into shelter. Only sheep, goats and the like with their natural fur coats can expect to survive a winter night. In some of these part, so you don't have a horse either unless you are properly prepared.

Oh but Freddie? It's a well to do area with plenty of inns and taverns. Well-worn roads and things can help me out and see to things.

I'm very happy for you. And indeed, that is another way to travel in the heights of winter. You have to plan it according to where you are going to spend the night. Where you are going to eat hot food and where are you going to find shelter for your horses.

Which comes with it's own problems. Because everyone else has to do exactly the same thing. They have to seek shelter and find their own way as well. On roads. Roads that are little more than mud tracks, impacted over years of wagon wheels, hooves and people's boots. Snow is frozen water. When that snow melts because people walk all over it, you get mud. And now you're going to walk or ride through it.

When you do this, then it becomes vital that, not only do you need to make sure that you have somewhere warm for you, and your horse, to eat and sleep that night. You must also make sure that that same place has somewhere to clean your clothes so that you can put them on dry in the morning.

But Freddie, I have changes of clothes in my bags.

Do you? Then what are you going to do with the wet and muddy clothes? Put them in yet another bag? A bag full of wet, stinking filthy clothing. Do you want to know what happens to that kind of clothing? It rots and gets mouldy.

Learn from my mistakes. I beg you.

Now, some people, especially those people that might be reading in the far North or in Skellige, might be laughing at all of these things. Words like “sleds” and “Dog teams” might be running through your minds. And that is true. But that sort of thing needs two factors. The first is dogs that are trained for this purpose. Secondly, it requires thicker clothing. Because horse riding is an active way of travelling. Sled-ridng is a passive one. You just sit there and let the dogs take you.

Or so I'm told anyway.

But the rhythm of the movement is soporific and then you are riding on the sled, wrapped in your thick fur clothing and lulled by the noises of the dogs running in the snow and the sledcutting through the ice. And then you fall asleep. I hope I don't need to tell you exactly why this is so dangerous.

But there is one last factor that means that travel takes so much longer during the winter. And that is light. A day with a useful travelling light of fourteen to sixteen hours in the summer can be reduced to only six to eight hours in the winter, depending on where you are. So with all of the extra preperation that you have to do in the morning. As well as all the extra precautions that you have to take at night. This is what makes it take so long to travel in Winter.

And this is why Kerrass, and the world in general really, just stop during those winter months. Do not try to fight it. The winter will win.

So Kerrass was a good two days straight ride away from where we were. So in the end, it was five days before he turned up at Ariadne's gate. A couple of days for the messenger to find him and then another couple of days for him to get back as well as a day for him to finish what he was doing and make the preperations necessary.

Some people might be saying that I was, at the time, living with two different Sorceresses that could have got a message to Kerrass really easily. This is true. However, I suspect that both of those ladies were grateful for the extra time that this delay gave me to work on my recovery and getting my strength back. Not just physical strength but also the mental fortitude to withstand what was coming.

It seems silly now as I sit here, looking back. But at the time, I genuinely didn't know what I wanted to do when Kerrass got here. Part of me, stoked by the anger of the women around me I suspect, wanted to tell Kerrass to fuck off. To never come back and to suffer in torment. All the way through the spectrum of feeling until I we came to the part where I would just leave with him. We would never speak of this again and we would resume our journey as though nothing had ever happened.

Despite the practical barriers that got in the way of doing exactly that. Snow, cold, lack of food or direction, just for a beginning.

But I really didn't know what I wanted.

Of all people, it was Laurelen that understood about this more than anyone. As it turned out, Laurelen's particular field of study was thought process and what influences the way that the body works. How the body influences the mind and how the mind influences the body. I don't know what it was that had started her on this particular field of study but I was pretty sure that the beginnings had not been pleasant. From various mutterings, I suspect that her earliest teacher and master had been abusive in some way. I have even less idea as to how that works. But I know that Laurelen is one of the best people to have around you in a crisis but struggles to hold it together in a state of calm monotony.

Her work is still focused on finding some way that she could make Emma pregnant and it had been this particular topic of discussion that had caused the biggest arguments between her and Lady Yennefer. I don't know why and, quite frankly, I don't think it was any of my business. The things that they were talking about were well above my head anyway so I didn't give too much thought to it.

Laurelen and I had several long conversations about what was happening to me. Why was my body doing the things that it was doing. Why was mind playing these tricks on me and what else was going on. It was somewhat reassuring that there was actually a physical reason for all of this. Even if it was complicated and intricate. She ignored the old Humors theory and was speaking about various chemicals that the body produced that broght this through. One that had taken the name of Adrenaline and there were others as well. She taught me a few tricks on how to deal with the onrush of those emotions. Breathing tricks and the like. Meditation techniques as well for keeping myself rooted.

I couldn't tell you why the term was “rooted” but she seemed to think it was important.

One important thing that she said was quite interesting. She said that she had learned a lot in the time that she had begun associating with Ariadne. Apparently, Ariadne has forgotten more about the human body and mind and the way they work than modern medical and magical science has even dreamed exists. That she could tell me more about the way that my mind works than I could easily conceive.

Then she claimed to not know why Ariadne wasn't helping me through these problems.

Needless to say, I went to talk to Ariadne almost straight away. She told me that there were several reasons for this. The first was that she didn't want to think like she was my head doctor or my physical doctor. That she wanted to be my wife and lover and while she was waiting for that, she would content herself with being finacee and friend. That she didn't want me to confuse her for being in charge of my illnesses.

That seemed a little strange to me and I said so.

She took a breath and lay her quill down.

“Healing the mind is difficult.” She said. “Difficult, if not impossible in some cases. For a start, your mind cannot heal unless you are willing for it to be healed. Secondly, it's hard, tiring and painful. Humanity protects itself from pain and when a person's mind is sick, they often protect themselves from that. They wrap the injury or illness in metaphorical bandages. So, I would need to peel away the bandages, cut away the bindings and open the wound to actually see what the problem is before I can begin to heal it.

“This process is painful, hard and can take a long time. I do not want to be the instrument of causing you that pain. Sooner or later, you need a safe, loving place to return to. I want to be that place, both in terms of your mind and in terms of your body. And if I'm really lucky, I can do that in terms of your soul as well. I never want to be the instrument by which you have been hurt.”

“How do you know all of this?” I asked. “How do you know so much about how humanity works?”

She got a vacant look in her eyes as she gazed upon a distant memory. Or I guessed that that was what she was looking at.

“I believe that you will find out soon Freddie. Sooner than either of us would like for that matter. For now though, heal, rest and regain your strength.”

“Regaining my strength seems to be taking a long fucking time.”

I had had a particularly strong bout of tears that morning and it had left me feeling sensitive and breathless. I dreaded to think what Kerrass was going to make of my physical conditioning when he got back.

“Physical strength is easy Freddie.” She said. That is just a case of patience, time and proper work. I understand that regaining your strength after an injury is a lot like trying to coax a frightened wild animal into your hand.”

“I have heard the same.”

“Well, regaining your mental strength is almost exactly the same. Except that the last several times you got the animal into your hand, you hurt it badly. And the animal is made almost entirely of spikes that will cut your hand open if you touch it.”

“Interesting thought.”

So Ariadne and I talked of different things.

We talked about things that I might want to do to the Manor when I came to live there. Ariadne wanted to know if I wanted to make any changes and insisted that there would be no problems even if there were. I struggled with this. Ariadne was trying to get it into my head that this place was my home, or at the very least, it would soon be my home and that I should feel free to start thinking of it as such. That I should feel free to put my own stamp on it.

But I honestly couldn't think of anything else that I would add, or that I would take away. I would want a library, but we already had one. I didn't want to see the inside of the master bedchamber as that was still her bed chamber and that seemed.... rude to me. Intrusive. I liked the open aspect to the manor. I liked the fact that it was an “Outside” kind of dwelling. That we would live in the open air. I even allowed myself some small-scale fantasies of what it would be like with the two of us sneaking off somewhere to make love on the side of a mountain or amongst the herb bushes.

That last one was clearly ludicrous as no sooner would we be getting started, than Samantha would come blundering through the bushes and exclaim with surprise. Before, knowing her, settling down to watch and give out some unwanted pointers and criticise my performance.

Ariadne carefully asked about my tastes in art and I told her that the view was more than beautiful enough for me which got me an aww of appreciation. Then I told her that I needed nothing beautiful to look at, on the grounds that I could look at her. Which made her blush.

That's right, I made a Vampire blush. I'm just going to sit here and allow myself a moment of smugness.

But then she looked at me with that hooded, hungry expression again so we both had to take a little while to breathe carefully and not look at each other.

But that brought me to an interesting realisation. I really had no idea what I wanted with any of that. I had my mind on practicalities. I had no idea what artwork I wanted on my walls. I wanted soft places to sit, a large, warm bed, good food and drink and a place to talk with friends. I could be persuaded to enjoy being known for having a large wine collection or to become a connoisseur of Skelligan whisky or Redanian Vodka. But beyond that, what do I look for in artwork?

Historical scenes and portraits? I am enough of a historian to know that those “scenes” are often exaggerations. You would be astonished at the number of battle scenes that do not have the correct amount of blood or mud in them as an example. Paintings that miss out the mountains of dead and dying. The heaps of amputed limbs next to the surgeons tents or the circling carrion birds overhead.

And the least said about the royal portraits the better. For example. Did you know that King Foltest was bald and had some scars on his face from a childhood disease. They weren't signs of the pox, as many claim, but they were there nevertheless and the royal portrait artists tend to miss them out.

Or did you know that Queen Meve, although still beautiful even after her injury, the scar is actually much larger than the one illustrated in the most recent painting.

Queen Calanthe's hair was grey at the time of her death. Not black. King Henselt's beard was bushy and unkempt. Falka was actually rather pretty, rather than the twisted hag that she is often portrayed as and it was these good looks that many claimed as being ultimate proof as to who her parents were which is how we know it to be true.

So I can't see myself going for that kind of artwork.

And why would I want landscape paintings or paintings of flowers when I could simply go outside and see the same only the real examples of that.

So I don't know. Ariadne has encouraged me to buy artwork should any catch my eye and she will hang it accordingly.

Nor do I fancy the idea of Emma's and having a court minstrel of any kind. After a while, I just think that it would get a little odd to have a stranger sitting nearby and plucking away on this harp or that lute. That would get weird after a while.

We also talked about taste in food and clothing where I was similarly unhelpful. I like well-cooked food that isn't going to leave me shitting my brains out and clothing that is soft, warm, comfortable and practical. Beyond that, I am quite content for her to choose clothing that is workable for whatever social engagement we will be taking part in.

She told me that a tailor would be called for and that they would sort that out when it came time. Apparently, I would need some new outfits when we went to Toussaint anyway.

We also talked about Kerrass' Goddess a bit more. I had to force her to the topic a little as she was not entirely comfortable talking about it early on. This because she didn't want me thinking about it too much as she was concerned that it might send me into a bit of a back-slide.

The first time she addressed it was to give me a bit of a scolding.

“One of the things that bothered me about it the most was that she used my strategy to get you to sleep with her.” She exclaimed after one lunch where I had been particularly pushy with respect to getting her to talk about the who thing.

“Your strategy?”

“Yes.” She replied. Watching me carefully while also pretending not to and appear unconcerned. I really was getting better at reading her emotions. “Believe it or not Freddie, and I don't mean to injure your fragile male ego, but you are not the most complicated person sexually speaking.”

“No back up. You had a strategy?”

“Oh yes. Back before I hit on the idea of just arranging the marriage over your head. I did consider several other ways to get you to love me and for me to seduce you. I am sure that we have talked about this before.”

“Not about you having a strategy to sleep with me we haven't. It's one of those things that I feel pretty sure that I would remember.”

She laughed. “Well it's not that complicated really. Being aggressive with my sexuality towards you so that your mind is programmed to think of sex and physical pleasure whenever you are in my presence. Then I would be vulnerable so that you would feel as though you have to protect me and then I would shock you back towards the sex again. I felt pretty sure that this would get you into my bed.”

“I accept that. But why were you even thinking about that?”

She stared at me in confusion. Then a light went on behind her eyes. “Oh I see. Why was I.... You were afraid of me and that fear had yet to move towards the romantic and erotic fear that new lovers feel when they don't know how to touch each other yet. You were not making any, visible to me, steps towards ridding yourself of that fear and you were avoiding me. I admit, looking back, that some of these factors might have been in my imagination. I was a lovesick Vampire and we never think particularly clearly when we are getting emotional.”

“I shall add that to the list of things that we shall have to talk about at a later date.” I commented.

“About the emotional state of Vampires.”

“No,” I smiled. “About you being Lovesick.”

She laughed, and then gave another one of those looks that made me examine my food in careful detail.

“The truth was that one of the proposed methods for me to get through to you was a kind of “brute force” technique. I decided that I would confront you with the fact that you had nothing to fear from me by seducing you into my bed and having my way with you. Then you would find that I hadn't eaten you alive, that your soul was in no peril and that all I truly cared about was giving you pleasure.”

“And that was supposed to help me get past my terror of you?”

“Yes.”

“Oddly,” I mused. “I actually can't think of anything more terrifying.”

She laughed. “But you're excited by the idea now aren't you?”

“A little.” I admitted.

Another little snippet happened later as we were in the gardens, Ariadne was working and I was just sitting on her couch, snoozing.

Snoozing. Slightly deeper than a doze but a little lighter than a nap. For those of you that don't know what a snooze is.

“You were angry at first though weren't you? When I first got here I mean.” I asked suddenly. I don't know where the question came from but it suddenly occurred to me and I found that I desperately needed the answer.

“Yes.” She admitted. “Before I realised how ill you were. Yes, I was angry then. Although the full and proper term might be a bit closer towards “frustrated”.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well I was angry. But not really furious. I was more relieved and that relief that you had turned up not dead meant that I wasn't as angry as I could be, hence frustrated.”

“No, I meant, why were you angry?”

“Freddie, I've said this several times now but I will say it again. Just this once but if you make me say it again then I am going to begin to tease you about it. You ready?”

“Ummmm?”

“We are not yet married. Physical release through sex is good for you. Leaving aside the emotional things, it can help the body relax. All kinds of wonderful things happen to a body in a post orgasm haze. Men, especially, find it much easier to get to sleep after a good hard orgasm. But it is also a release of tension and frustration. There is a perfectly good reason as to why people can become addicted to such a feeling. Women too for that matter although our orgasms make us do slightly different things.”

“Oh?”

“Yes, they make us want more of them for a start.”

I laughed at that.

“Humans get to a point where that frustration and tension builds up to the point where they can't think straight.” Ariadne continued. “Young men are especially bad for that kind of thing. Your society still frowns on a lot of that kind of... thing. But I can't help but notice that prostitution is legal in most countries on the continent, even in the most strictly religious cities such as Novigrad. I also notice that there are male and female courtesans so, while society doesn't like to acknowledge it, they do know that it happens. But back to my original point.

“You and I are not yet married. I admired the fact that you were trying to stay faithful to me in the wake of our betrothal but you are a young, male human. I absolutely expected you to give into your needs. Going behind a tree to have some alone time apart from anything else. I was stunned that none of the Skelligan Shieldmaidens managed to have their way with you. They might even have taught you a thing or two.”

It's important to notice that she was writing away at a document in front of her as she said all of this.

“I can even think of several situations where it might even become dangerous for you to not have some form of sexual release. If an enemy tried to appeal to your libido in order to seduce you into doing something bad for example. A flash of leg or cleavage and you are distracted from what you should be listening to. It's even good sense to go off and get laid before you speak to some dangerous person who uses their sexuality as a weapon.”

“So, you would be happy if I?...”

“Happy is the wrong word. Comfortable would be closer to the right term. After we are married then I would expect, and hope, that we would get any kind of sexual gratification from each other rather than having to seek out other partners. I know myself well enough to know that I will never tire of you and I can change my appearance and shape enough to cover any other fascinations that might draw your eye.”

“I would never....”

“Freddie, you are being foolish again. Stop that.”

My mouth closed with a snap.

“But in the meantime, the body and the mind has a need for comfort, intimacy and occasional sexual release. I agree with Kerrass on this matter. The only reason that you and I are not partaking of each other is because of the pending marriage thing. Obeying that tradition is important to many people, including you, but also to my lieges, and to the religion and society that I have joined.”

“But that's unfair on you.”

“Not in the least. I know you love me and I know that, when we are married, I will destroy you if you are unfaithful. But in the meantime, there is no reason to....”

“That's not what I meant.”

“Oh..... Oh,”

She turned her chair round and faced me, taking my hand in hers. “Freddie, you know I love you right?”

“I do.”

“Good. I am not a virgin. I lost my virginity before your people were seen in this part of the world. I have known clinical physical pleasure and am well aware of my bodies reactions to erotic stimulus. Are you aware of that? are you comfortable with that?”

I nodded.

“When your people landed, I was struck by the physiological similarities between you and us and one of my early experiments in the field involved exploring sexuality with some of my male subjects. So you will not be the first human that I have had sex with. Do you understand that? Are you comfortable with that?”

I nodded again.

“When I was imprisoned in my tower, the woman I was imprisoned with was my maid. But the technical term was that she was my hand-maid. Do you know what that means?”

I swallowed. “You and she were lovers.”

“Close, She saw to my physical needs in that regard and I would often reciprocate as a reward for her service. I left off when she started to become uncomfortable with her advancing age and mental degradation. But when I escaped and was thinking about my future with you. I explored whether or not I was still physically capable and inclined. I wanted to know if my having to rebuild myself had adjusted anything untoward as well as seeing if humanity had changed in that way. So you will not be the first man that I have taken to my bed since escaping the tower. Are you ok with that?”

I considered that. That she wasn't a virgin had not escaped me and I was not surprised by that. And the way she had spoken about sex in the past had not had any sense of shyness about it. She was rather frank on the subject which meant that she knew some things. So I decided that I was ok with that as well.

I said so.

“And finally. I have told you many times that I did not really consider us bound in that way until we were married. We have sworn an oath to marry, but none of that fidelity stuff has been sworn yet. I am provably not a virgin and I see no reason that I should be bound by a desire to protect that non-existent status of virginity when it comes to myself. And I also have physical needs.

“So when the urge has taken over me, I have teleported to other places where they would not know who or what I am and made use of the services of some of the sex workers in those places.”

She smiled wickedly. “Both male and female ones. Are you alright with that?”

I found that I was. I could not have thought that out logically but I was alright with that. I nodded and I thought I saw a small fear leave her eyes. Her smile turned predatory again and there was humour there as she crouched over me, leaning in to whisper in my ear.

“You didn't think that Maleficent and I were just friends did you?”

“Ok, now I know that you're messing with me.”

“Am I?” She laughed and pulled back. “Freddie, when we are married I am going to give you everything that you could dream of and keep you all to myself while giving you that same gift in return. You shall have all of me and I would not have it any other way. But in the meantime. A girl occasionally needs something a little extra and that wooden carving in my room is not always sufficient.”

I laughed at that and felt oddly better before a thought occurred. “I noticed that you didn't confirm that you were joking about Maleficent.”

Ariadne just smiled. I remain confident that she was just teasing me though. About Maleficent that is, not the rest of it.

It was the following day that we had another conversation about the subject. We were taking a walk through the gardens and Ariadne was giving me something of a tour. She was showing me what the different plants were and giving me a brief overview of what they were used for, what they looked like and why she had put them there. Not for the first time I was astonished by how she balanced all three considerations. Particularly interesting was that area where there were plants that had no aesthetic value at all, but the scent that they gave off was powerful, heady and smelled wonderful. So she had put them in an area of the grounds that had formed a wind tunnel so that the scent was sent all round the estate.

Also of interest was the greenhouse. A small building of coloured glass that Ariadne and Samantha were the only people that were allowed in it. I was allowed to look inside providing I didn't touch anything. The purpose of the place was that there were certain plants that prefer warmer, more humid air. There were also other plants that needed to be protected from the harsher light of the sun. This was the building that managed that and I was told to be grateful. There had had to be considerable care given to some of these things to ensure that the plant didn't die out.

I learned of a network that exists about these kinds of plants. A network that I have never heard of and will not now give away now that I know of it's existence. It is a network of wise-women, healers and women that know a little bit about things. I was not astonished to learn that the Alchemist that Kerrass had introduced me to in Northern Redania was part of this network. But they share seeds, seedlings and herb-journals. Loose leaf guides on how to cross-breed plants (which is apparently a thing) and the proper treatment and storage of them.

They do this, firstly so that, should an emergency come up then there are stocks of these plants all over the continent. But also to ensure that these plants do not die out. According to Samantha, who gave me a small lecture on the subject later, it is not unheard of for the more delicate of these plants to just die out for no readily apparent reason. One of the things that Ariadne is working on at the moment is whether any of this is due to the shifting of the lines of magical force that always take place as time passes. And whether or not magic can have an effect on the growth of these things.

They districute these things for free. Paying transport fees and the like out of their own pocket. And it is vital to keep these things safe for two reasons. The first is that the Lords and ladies of the land might come to believe that they have a right to these plants and demand them be handed over to the death and destruction of the plants in question. And secondly, if someone like Emma, and she admits this, got hold of these kinds of things. Then they would be charged for and the costs would be astronomical. Which means that only the rich and the noble could have access to the healing. Even if the plant was just sitting there, doing nothing, then royalty would insist that the plant be preserved and unused in case they, or their children were suddenly taken sick.

But I am getting off topic. We were stood and staring down at one of the small rivers that had come down off the mountain. There are loads of them in that part of the world as they run down-hill to feed into the pontar. They tend to be fast-moving and it takes clever, often dwarven, engineering to be able to make use of them to irrigate the fields.

It was a beautiful place and Ariadne was telling me that this was one of her favourite spots to have her study in place. So she could sit and watch the world turn around her. But only in the spring and the summer.

Autumn is far too busy to be sitting and watching.

“So what do you think of what the Goddess actually told me?” I asked suddenly. It had been a question that had been on my mind for some time. She was the only person in our little circle of friends, our family unit if you like, that had not expressed an opinion on what had actually been said. Mark had expressed interest in certain factors, especially in regards to some of the things that the Goddess had said about gender roles and the treatment of women by others. Yennefer had been fascinated by the history of the thing and had laughed for a long time when it had come to the little speech about the three faces of womanhood.

Emma had been angry but was aware enough to admit that the reason she was quite so angry was due to what had happened to me. Laurelen had just pursed her lips and said that she didn't like the manipulative nature of the woman.

“About which part?” Ariadne asked.

“All of it?” I responded. “Some of it? I don't know. I just.... you know, had to wonder.”

She smirked at that a little bit.

“I am angry,” she admitted after a while. “Very angry that you were taken there. Very angry at what it did to you, but I find that that's what I'm angry about. What she actually said?”

She shook her head.

“I am coming to suspect several things.” She began, steering me back towards the house and the complex. “The first and most obvious thing to be said is that if she were human, she is the truest person to herself that I have ever heard of.”

She looked at me sidelong. “I don't think she was human.” She told me.

“I didn't think so.” I reassured her.

“But as a person, regardless of race, I think she has chosen her.... her philosophy, and has dedicated herself to that more thoroughly than anyone or anything else that I have ever heard of. It is actually the strongest evidence for her claim to Godhood. No-one else is that... That true to a single ideal.”

“What do you mean?”

“Interviewing me Freddie?” She asked with a raised eyebrow and a slight smile.

“Sorry,”

“Don't be. I am actually quite reassured that you are returning to asking questions. But think about it. You are not just a scholar. You are also a fighter, you are, whether you like it or not. I did agree with the Goddess on that front. You have been fighting something all your life. Debate, argument and scientific method have been your weapons. Long before Kerrass put a spear in your hand.

This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere.

“You are also a traveller and educator which are not the same things as being a scholar. You are a lover.”

I blushed.

“Not like that.” She chided. “But you love people and things. You love me, you love your family, you love your friends. You love the lands that you see, the people that you meet, the food that you eat and the wine that you drink. You love it all. I sometimes suspect that you even love the darkness in your soul more than you would care to admit. You love the pain that comes with experience more than I am entirely comfortable with. But you love everything and you are always searching for new things to love. New experiences to cherish.

“So given all of these things, what would you be the God of Freddie?”

I frowned in thought, it was an interesting question.

“Precisely.” Ariadne is beginning to get a disturbing habit of being able to read my thoughts off my face. “And you are human, so what your philosophy was when you were younger is not going to be the same as your philosophy when you are an old man. That's because you are human and experience changes you. It will change me as well except on a much slower and smaller scale than it will for you.

“But she was the Goddess of Battle and she really was Battle personified. Her conversation was a battle, she was constantly challenging you and the way you think, trying to challenge your accepted norms and force you into thinking differently. She wanted to argue with you. She wanted to fight. She talked, acted, seduced and loved as though all of those things were battles. As though she was fighting you.

“I also theorise that, looking at when things turned to violence between the two of you. I strongly suspect that she could have killed you at any moment. So she deliberately prolonged the violence. She extended the fighting. Why?”

We had reached the door of her receiving room. We had informally adopted a pair of arm-chairs close to the fire for when we were just being together. I held the door open for her and she took her cloak off before hanging it on a nearby stand. We weren't expecting any visitors so there was no doorman at the time but when we walked in, a servant did come out of a side door to check if we wanted anything. Ariadne ordered some coffee while I asked for some mulled wine.

I have found that the coffee has a profound effect on my sleeping pattern and as such, I do not drink it in the afternoon as otherwise, I find that I cannot sleep. Some nice, spiced wine to drink and wrap my hands around was more than enough for me.

“I don't know but I have two theories.” Ariadne continued as she tucked her legs under her. She claims to enjoy sitting like that because it helps her to stop herself from just jumping on me and taking advantage of me. I suspect that it is a guise to help her appear more demure.

Or that it makes it easier to keep her legs and feet warm. That's probably it.

“I could analyse further but that would take time and more space than I have strict time for given everything that is going on at the moment.” She claimed.

“What are the theories?” I wondered.

“The first is that she enjoys the conflict for conflict's sake. The kind of person that would make an argument over what colour the sky is. Whether black is white or white is black. You must have known people like that. The kind of person who will automatically take the opposite viewpoint of whatever discussion is being had for the sheer hell of it. Because they enjoy it when people come back at them for the conflict. Lady Yennefer is one such person although I am told that she is mellowing out.

“But the second option is that she gained some form of power from it. That in taking part in the conflict, she became stronger. That would be another point in favour of the theory that she is a Goddess.”

“And the two theories are not mutually exclusive.” I said. “Succubi enjoy sex while also gaining power from it.”

“They do, but I don't think that Succubi are Goddesses.” She smiled.

“Probably not.”

“But hard truth time. Are you ready?”

“I think so.”

“I think we are going to look back on that chapter of your life and we are going to thank that Goddess that it happened. I think we're going to consider ourselves lucky that Kerrass took you there and forced that to happen so that she could tell you some truths and make you think in ways that you weren't entirely comfortable with.

“I think that you would have come here for the winter and instead of taking the time to rest, heal and recuperate. You would have spent time working the problem of Francesca's dissappearance. You would have chafed at the enforced idleness of Winter and then, when we went to Toussaint, instead of seeing to your familial duties, you would have spent the time trying to reconstruct what happened with your sister. Still thinking that you, of all people, in your pride and arrogance, would be able to find something that everyone else, including people far more experienced and qualified were able to find.

“And when you weren't doing that. You would have been with Kerrass in some room somewhere, figuring out where you were going to look next. And who you were going to interrogate. At best, you would have been exhausted and simply died at some point. But at worst....?

She shook her head. She was painting a bleak picture and I wish I could say that I disagreed with her.

“I think that, instead of coming to a lurching halt like you have now, you would have just slowly drifted of into your obsession. I think that in six months time you would have contacted me and tried to postpone the wedding on the grounds that you still didn't know where Francesca was. I would have been angry on the grounds that you promised me. But you would have been adamant. As would I and as would Emma and everyone else. “Then you would have simply departed. If we had married you would have resented me for forcing the issue. If you had just not come home then you would have stayed out there. Forcing yourself onwards to the detriment of your health and your relationships. But instead, A Goddess did not tell you what you wanted to hear. She told you what you needed to hear.

“It was harsh. It was awful and painful and she did you untold damage. But I really do think that we will look back on this all and think of it as a blessing in disguise. As it means that you are confronted with all of the ways that things were going wrong.”

I wept then for a little while. Ariadne climbed out of her chair and held me as I sobbed.

Beyond all of that, Ariadne spent a good amount of time forging us all back into a family, seemingly through charm and grim determination. I was moved into another guest room where it was considerably warmer. Something that I was much happier with now. I felt like I actually belonged in the place. That I wasn't an intruder any more and that, instead, I could begin to enjoy myself a little more.

We would all dine together as often as possible, breakfast, luncheon and dinner were served together in an informal atmosphere with Ariadne at the head of the table. Lady Yennefer often joined us and as soon as it became clear that she had set aside her previous slight antipathy towards Laurelen, Lady Yennefer became a charming and entertaining person to be around. I have seen my sister mount a charm offensive before but I had never experienced anything like Lady Yennefer's sense of humour and chaarisma when she put her mind to it.

It's far too easy to remember all the stories about her tumultuous affairs and biting humour and temper when you look at her. And she does not help matters when it comes to that kind of thing. She likes that aspect of herself but I get the impression that she also likes to let her hair down occasionally and get really drunk with her friends. I don't think that I was the only one who was really quite flattered that we were among the people that she had chosen to pursue that with.

It was nice. Watching Lady Yennefer tease Mark, in his position of Cardinal, never stopped being funny. Nor did it stop being funny when Mark would turn around and respond with a cutting remark of his own that Lady Yennefer hadn't seen coming. Then she would purse her lips and get all tense as she prepared herself to get really angry. But then she would realise that she was being made fun of and would relax, often coming back with an equally cutting remark. She missed Lord Geralt I think but could not face joining him in Cintra.

Not yet anyway.

I never asked why. She seemed to get a distant, far away glint in her eye whenever the subject of the Empress wintering in Cintra with Lord Geralt and the retired Emperor. But then she would rally and regale us with some other anecdote or other that made us all cry with embarrassed laughter.

We were now at the stage with the book where we were arging over sentence placement. Layout was set, chapter order and content was set. But we were arguing over things like sentence structure. If it had been during the warmer weather, then the book would be done and sent off to the publishers and indeed, it wouldn't surprise me if, by now as you read this, it is either available for sale or will be coming out soon.

But we were at that stage of things where we would soon have to admit that we were done with the book. That it was time to set it aside and move onto the next project. Whatever that was. I would miss Lady Yennefer. She had a way of working that I found most agreeable and we were developing a working shorthand with each other that I rather think we appreciated. She made me a better technical writer and curtailed my greatest faults as a writer.

In case you are wondering, she would catch me going off on a tangent and yell at me about staying on topic. In turn, I taught her that she was writing for a wider audience than just her fellow mages and sorcereresses.

But the family unit began to emerge and I felt better by the day.

Living in the guest room rather than in one of the outside storage sheds (Ariadne's words) began to have an effect on me physically. I began to feel stronger and more sure of myself and then, a little while after that, I took up my spear and went outside for some training. Just small stuff really but I had begun to feel the lack of that level and style of activity. I had begun to feel sluggish and stiff. My energy had returned and I began to feel that desire to move around in my legs again.

I was pitifully weak. I still had a lot of my speed and providing I could end a fight quickly, I was still up to my old standards. But my stamina was shot. The Captain of Mark's guards came and gave me some pointers, telling me that I shouldn't take it too hard. That I should take my time and take it easy. To work up to it. He was being good and supportive but I took great delight in kicking his ass later in a quick little sparring contest. He won the second bout though as I began to tire and also because he had learned not to take anything for granted.

But that did make me feel better.

We also discussed the wedding and I found out some more details that I hadn't been party to before that. The bridal party was going to be Maleficent as the Matron of honour, The Duchess of Angraal, The Queen of Dorn, Lady Margarita Laux-Antille and Lady Yennefer. Apparently, Ariadne had wanted Lady Findabair and Madame Ida Aep Amean to serve as she had known the two Elves the longest. But their reluctance to leave their Elven territory had meant that they had declined politely. Ariadne had not been particularly surprised by this and had lined up replacements very promptly.

She had asked if Emma wanted to join the bridal party as well. But Emma had wanted to stand next to me on the day. So the Bridal party contained a Dragon, Sleeping Beauty and two members of the Lodge of Sorceresses. Lady Yennefer who had been friendly with Ariadne due to her original status as something of an outsider in the lodge, and a friendship between Lady Laux-Antille and Ariadne had come together due to the two of them working together on cataloguing and salvaging as much of the library of Pula, Saffron and Sally as they could. That was an interesting conversation actually. Lady Margarita is one of the few Sorceresses that I haven't yet met from the Lodge and it was a little astonishing to learn that she and Ariadne are fairly close. One of those, “Did I not tell you,” kind of things.

On my side, it was established that Kerrass would be my best man with Mark, Emma, Sam and Ciri as our adopted sibling, as part of it. According to Emma, Ciri had become really quite insistent on the matter of being an adopted part of the family and had been actively involved in negotiating certain aspects of things.

There had been some issues when it came to the question of who was going to be directly involved in the chapel itself.

For those people who don't know how a wedding in the Eternal Flame works. I have said it before but it bears repeating. The people who actually witness the ceremony itself are relatively small. Generally the immediate friends and family of both partners while all the guests wait outside in order to cheer when the ceremony is complete. So there was another round of politics that was taking place as to who would be in direct attendance of the ceremony itself.

There were surprisingly few people. On my side of the aisle, Sir Rickard was coming and he was escorting Dr Shani in attendance. Jarl Helfdan of Skellige would also be there and his escort would be Queen Cerys herself....

I should have talked about this. I know that, to the majority of you, this won't be news and due to all of the things happening to me, I didn't find out about it until long after the fact. But despite the fact that Helfdan spent the remains of the Autumn acting as Ambassador to the Nilfgaardian court where he caused all kinds of enjoyable chaos.

In the words of the Empress no less.

When he returned to Skellige for the winter, he and Jarl Hjalmar had gone out hunting together. Then they had gone out drinking and the following day they had spent their time recovering. But the day after that, before Helfdan had had to return to Holmstein to oversee the works that was taking place there in building the new castle of the Black Boar. Jarl Helfdan declared his undying love for Queen Cerys before her royal court.

Queen Cerys accepted with a girlish grin that took a clear decade off her age while ignoring Hjalmar's nodding of approval.

According to witnesses, Helfdan fainted on the spot and had to be caught by a laughing Svein.

Their official betrothal ceremony will take place over the Skelligan Winter festival as presided over by Lord Ermion. I wish I could be there. According to my information, it's far too early to set a date for the wedding itself as my wedding is logistical enough. Their wedding is going to be far more political when it comes to it.But the two of them will be attending my ceremony and I can't wait to see the crew of the Wave-Serpent again.

I couldn't be more pleased for Helfdan. If there is another man on the continent that deserves proper and full happiness after the life that he has led, I would like to meet them. I wish I had been there to see his face when the Queen said yes and I look forward to exchanging notes with Svein and Hjalmar when I see them.

Of course both of them are coming to my wedding. They will not be in the ceremony itself but they will be at the feast and party afterwards.

There are also some other friends and their partners coming from my University days. But only room for another six or so of them in total. The man who helped put my feet on the path and suggested a direction of travel will be there with his wife. And there are two other friends coming but I don't want to make their lives hell by giving their names here, as well as Laurelen as Emma's escort although I have reassured her that she would be there in her own right. Ciri is bringing Lord Voorhis as her escort on the grounds that he would sulk if he wasn't allowed to be in the same castle as all of the significant figures that were going to be there. Mark isn't bringing anyone and Sam, although still insisting that he will be present, still hasn't said whether he will be accompanied by anyone.

On Ariadne's side, other than the two Elves who are staying home, despite promising several crates of Elven Elderflower wine to help with the ceremony, the other members of the Lodge of Sorceresses will be there as well. Lord Geralt will be on Ariadne's side as an escort to Lady Yennefer, Princess Dorn is being escorted by some Lord that I have never heard of. The last time I exchanged letters with Lady Marion (She's a Lady now. Apparently, you can't attend on a Queen without being a Lady and so she was made a Lady and a Baroness of some unclaimed part of Dorn. According to her letters, she is unlikely to ever get to live in the place but her grandchildren will probably be able to build a home there,) the man is one of those suitors for Queen Dorn's hand that she (Marion) despises the least. For my part, I am left just hoping that this will not cause a problem for Kerrass.

I also understand that there was a suggestion that the Queen could be escorted by Kerrass, but Kerrass is still far too willing to bite his nose off to spite his face to be that close to Sleeping Beauty openly.

Lady Metz is bringing another Witcher. Lambert whom I remember disliking intensely, but Ariadne insists that he has mellowed a little now that his jealousy of Lord Geralt has subsided a little. Lady Merigold is bringing the King of Kovir, another escort who is there to take advantage of the politicing I think. Lady's Eilhart and Vigo intend to bring someone but have not yet decided who they want to bring while Lady Laux-Antille is not bringing anyone. And naturally, the Duke of Angraal will be there as guest and escort to his wife.

Maleficent intends to pick someone. Ariadne grinned as she told the story. She was going to choose some poor, kind and hard-working single young man. The kind of man who is too shy to be able to cope with being around girls. Then she was going to kidnap him in dragon form, the way that dragons are supposed to do with young female virgins, before carting him off to the best tailor's in Novigrad. She would clean him up, feed him up, heal him up if necessary and then have him escort her to our wedding. She was going to deliberately look as gorgeous as she could possibly manage while wearing something knee-droppingly revealing, in order to blow his mind (while not outclassing the bride of course. Such things are simply not done. Maleifcent's words apparently) Then she was going to take him off to her suite of rooms, wherever that might be, and teach him how to please a woman and otherwise have her way with him.

Then she intended to drop him off where she found him with a new sense of confidence and point out a pretty girl that would be interested in him before flying off somewhere. There was a certain amount of entertainment going on as to guessing what the young man might say to all the people around him. “No, I really was kidnapped by a dragon, fed, watered before being taken to a party where I met the Empress of the continent, the King of Kovir, the Queen of Skellige, most of the Lodge of Sorceresses and I was entertained as an honoured guest at the high table of the Coulthard trading company, before being taken off to a suite of rooms where this strange and otherworldly woman with horns proceeded to make love to me until dawn.

Then she brought me home.”

Ariadne found the story really funny and claimed not to know if Maleficent was joking or not.

Although undeniably funny, I did think that this had the possibility of being really cruel and said so. Ariadne mused on this and promised to speak to Maleficent about it.

After the ceremony we would emerge, guarded by an honour guard made up of the surviving crew of the Wave-Serpent and the survivors of our fleeing from the cult in the North that still followed Rickard's commands. Apparently there had been a brief argument as to which of the two had precedence which Ariadne, of all people, had solved by simply asking. “Why not both. There is plenty of room in the courtyard of the castle.

Then there is going to be a feast. Ariadne, being Ariadne, wants all of the “traditional” trappings of a wedding. She wants dancing, drinking and music. But she also wants speeches and a capping ceremony. She wants people to dive for shoes and herd pigs.

I'm told that Count Tybalt (A Redanian Nobleman who is relatively local to us. A refreshing gentleman who is so old money that he thinks that coinage is a new-fangled invention. Refreshing because he has absolutely no prejudice in any way. He is not sexist, racist or anti-magic. He and Emma get on as he was one of Father's first acquiantences that allowed his factors to do business with Emma, openly, after she took over the company. So of course he's coming to the wedding) is organising a closed deck Gwent tournament with a fifty crown buy in which gets you a series of decks which the Count is having made specifically. Matches will be played according to the “Speed-Gwent” rules so that we can get the entire thing finished on the night. and the winner declares the good cause that the pot goes to at the end.

There will also be athletic contests during the day of the wrestling, running and throwing variety. No caber tossing though as we don't have the room and there will not be any jousting or weapons matches as we don't have the facilities.

There will be an archery contest though. Heats will be arranged in advance so anyone that wants to take part should make themselves known. The prize is the Daniel memorial cup and Emma intends to to make the contest an annual one, where archers come and compete for the prize in memory of the extraordinary old poacher that made the sun shot. So named for the poem that has been written about the incident by Professor Dandelion who described that final shot that ended the life of Lord Cavil as “The Arrow that came out of the sun.”

Sir Rickard has staked out the course and intends the final challenge to be a series of people who try and emulate that final, impossible shot. The winner will be the person that gets closest. It seems unfeasable to us that anyone could emulate the shot but hey... People can train for it now.

There will also be a capping ceremony, the flowers will be tossed but I have drawn the line at my climbing beneath Ariadne's dress and removing her garter with my teeth. I can't see that ending well. But in return, Ariadne has insisted that she be carried up to the marital suite. We are going to be using one of the guest rooms at Coulthard castle for that. I couldn't face using one of the family rooms and my own room was too small although Ariadne claimed that she would be perfectly happy with that.

So it's going to be a busy day. I did complain that with everything going on, I was rather concerned that I would be too exhausted, drunk or full of food to properly see to the matter of consummating our marriage.

But Ariadne and the other women there at the time, Emma, Laurelen and Lady Yennefer, giggled and told me that after waiting that long she would not be put off so easily. Then she looked a little sinister when she told me that she had ways to help out with that kind of thing.

I shivered.

There are still some logistical issues to sort out. Getting all the wine that Emma is sure that we will need of sufficient quality and quantity. There needs to be food testing and things because although Coulthard castle Kitchens are formidable, there are going to be a lot of guests. Most of the people in the local area will be coming in one form or another, as another of the few things that I insisted on was that the villagers, farmers and towns-folk of the local area deserved to help us celebrate as well. So Emma was discussing making up a temporary outdoor kitchen to meet the requirments.

The tentative plan is that close friends and family will have arrived at the castle in advance. The people who will be helping with the ceremony rather than actually being guests. Then there will be my stag party as well as Ariadne's Hen party. So organised because then several of my friends will need to leave in order to make their way back to escort the Queen of Skellige into the wedding, for example. I still didn't know what was planned for my stag party. I had tentatively decided that either Sir Rickard or one of my oldest friends from University would act as best man for me should Kerrass' and my antipathy become a more permanent factor.

I also didn't know what was happening for Ariadne's Hen party. There have been some jokes and I know that Emma is nervous. Jokes about Spa days in the clouds have been made along with throwing everyone out of the Passiflora and other such entertainments that I am fairly confident were said just to wind me up. All I know is that Ariadne, Emma, Laurelen and other people will be heading off at some point for a few days.

Lady Yennefer cackled, when I asked her what was planned. Emma was as much in the dark as I was on the grounds that Laurelen had told the others that she would be too nervous, and/or more likely to tell me what was going to happen. Apparently, hiding these events from me, the groom, was part of the fun.

For those people wondering. The Empress had stated her intentions to attend both my stag party and Ariadne's Hen party. As it turns out, when you're the Empress of the continent, you can do that kind of thing and no-one is going to complain about it.

Then the plan is that things will start ramping up properly about a fortnight before the wedding itself when we, all of us, will be involved in the preparation for the day itself. Too busy for anything social. There was a very loose idea that we should all get together to have a quieter, more intimate dinner before hand to just take a moment before the storm broke.

It all sounded a little overwhelmingto me, but Emma claimed to have it all in hand and I wasn't going to try and claim differently. The festivities would last for a few days afterwards before they would peter out.

Ariadne and I would leave after the last of the major ranking guests had left to go to Skellige where we would spend our Honeymoon as guests of Jarl Helfdan. The Jarl has, I'm told, ordered us a nice quiet cabin built in the woods somewhere. We can attend all the feasts, hunts and sailing that we like. We can spend time with the Jarl and our friends on the island until we all get bored with each other. Queen Cerys, Jarl Hjalmar and Helfdan himself have promised that there will be guest rooms in the keeps available at any time should we wish to stay closer to the center of activity. But there will always be that quiet cabin out in the woods should we just wish for some peace and Quiet.

If the wedding itself is even a fraction as stressful as Emma seems to suggest that it might be. I think that we will end up feasting with Helfdan and the rest a couple of times. With the Queen and her brother a few more times. But some peace and quiet with the woman that I love sounds wonderful.

After that, we will return to Angral to learn what it's like to be a married couple. I will admit to looking forward to that bit. Even while I find the prospect a little frightening.

I enjoyed that delay, from the moment where Ariadne sent out messages to bring Kerrass back, and when he arrived. I learnt more about my family than I had previously known.

For instance, I learned that the Cardinals of the Church of Eternal Flame have a Gwent league which they play on their downtime as a distraction. Apparently they find it a very useful, almost meditative as well as a way to help them learn to think like the common man. Mark plays a Nilfgaardian deck, for those of you that are interested. He's very good, a bit spy heavy which means that he regularly has more cards left at the end of a match, but I taught him the error of depending on that where I had all his powerful spies giving me the extra numbers to win an early round. Then my medics brought them all out in a third round tie-breaker so my card numbers multiplied.

I'm not that competitive and as such, I'm not a serious card player. But I constructed a Scoia'tael deck to tweak his nose a bit. He was beginning to get smug so I built a deck specifically to assassinate his. It was glorious. He won the rematch because of course he did but that delay was amazing.

Mark is hoping to compete in the tournament at the wedding, but duties as well as physical capabilities might prohibit this.

Apparently the Hierophant likes the new Skellige deck. Also apparently, he's so good with the other decks that it gets boring. Of course the Hierophant is invited to the wedding, but he has declined. As he does with all such invitations.

Queen Adda has also declined but I'm not too concerned about that. From what Emma was saying, it sounded like there was politcs involved. Mostly due to the fact that we are still just a small barony. The fact that several other monarchs are coming might change her mind and I don't fancy untangling that knot.

During that time, I also witnessed an ongoing effort of Laurelen trying to teach Ariadne to play Gwent. She didn't like it as she didn't like the uncertainty of the initial ten card draw, saying that it was impossible to build a strategy with that much uncertainty. And nothing that either Mark or Laurelen have been able to do has managed to convince her otherwise. Emma plays but she is not as passionate as Mark or Laurelen and Yennefer enjoys watching. Apparently, Lord Geralt is quite the player despite coming to it late and Lady Yennefer insisted that he would take part in the tournament.

The retired Emperor will not be coming either as he tries to stay out of social engagements and leave the governing to his daughter.

The day that Kerrass finally arrived was one of those winter days where the skies are clear and the sun shines down with a bright, eye-hurting intensity. The heat from the sun then melts the very top layer of the snow which will then, in turn, freeze again over night which goes on to prolong the winter. As I say, I slept in one of the guest rooms now and I was woken by a tentative knock on the door. Which opened to admit Ariadne.

It turns out that she needs a full night's sleep about one day in four or so depending on the level of exertion. This can be extended by taking power naps of an hour or two but sooner or later she crashes out. I did ask how this was going to affect married life and she was still thinking about it.

I told her that I was not too comfortable with the idea of her just watching me sleep. That felt a little creepy to me.

But she came in and had a small debate with herself as to where she should sit before kind of giving up and standing in the middle of the room.

“Kerrass is coming.” She said. “He is about four hours away.”

“How do you know that?” I wondered sleepily.

“Freddie, there will come a time when you will become more comfortable with the idea that I have ways, means and methods that mean that I am intimately aware of what is happening on my lands.”

I grunted that I should have accepted that. “That's what happens when you wake me up from a lovely dream.”

“What were you dreaming about?” She asked.

I leered at her and she laughed before turning back for the door. “I will have some breakfast made.”

Then I had to think about what to wear. It might seem odd that I would do that, surely I would just dress normally. And you would be right. But my mind wasn't working like that. We had not left things on the best of terms and I was left wondering. Do I dress normally in the kind of warm, rough and ready nobleman's outfit that I had been wearing. Or do I dress down as though I am ready to get out on the road with him again, which I wasn't. Or do I dress up as though I was getting ready to greet a guest and a prestigious one at that.

In the end I decided, correctly I think, that I was overthinking it and just dressed in my normal clothing. Shirt, tunic, trews, belt and thick overcoat.

Breakfast was a subdued affair. Ariadne and Emma joined me. Mark is much slower to rise nowadays than he used to be, especially with the cold weather. There was a tension in the air and that tension was building.

None of us knew what was going to happen.

We were at that stage of the morning, Mark had arrived and was shoveling eggs down his throat in a way that spoke of a rapacious hunger. Laurelen had also surfaced and was eating a grape-fruit carefully while Yennefer joined Ariadne in drinking from a pot of particularly strong coffee.

Why did it not surprise me that Yennefer turned out to be a fan of the amazingly strong drink.

But then a servant came in and whispered something in Ariadne's ear. Ariadne nodded and looksed up at me.

“It's time.” She said.

I nodded and took a deep breath.

“I can send him on his way again if you wish.” Ariadne told me in a careful tone of voice, as though she was getting me ready for something. “If you're still not up to it then we can take steps.”

“No,” I decided, fairly quickly to be honest. “If we are going to do a thing then it is best that we do that thing quickly.”

“It's a nice quote.” Emma said, I wondered if I was imagining the dissappointment in her voice. “But reading about your adventures with a Witcher tells me that that is only the case if you know what you are dealing with and are properly prepared for the matter.”

“You are not wrong.” I agreed. “But at the same time, The longer I put this off, the harder it will be.”

I took another deep breath and led the small procession out into the sunlight.

We weren't waiting long before we could see Kerrass riding up the path and into the courtyard.

He looked awful. Even for him he was pale and haggard, eyes with huge shadows underneath them, bloodshot gaze that darted everywhere. His hair was lank and greasy and he looked, to my eyes at least, as though he had lost a load of weight. The next thing that struck me was that I had never seen him in his proper, full on, cold weather outfit. I had seen the extra precautions that he had taken in Skellige, but he had not worn this stuff. He was wearing a thick, dark green overcoat that had some kind of fur lined padding going on underneath which further insulated him from the cold. There were longer sleeves on his arms and thicker, woolen edges to his gloves and collar and things.

It was an odd contrast. Being newer and less used, his clothing looked richer and better quality even though I knew that that would be false given that he doesn't scrimp on his equipment, armour and the like when he replaces anything. But that, contrasted with the seeming lack of care when it came to his person and the contrast was... startling. He had both swords on his back.

He dismounted just outside the courtyard and led his horse in. Ariadne had a long wooden box in her arms which she passed to me. A groom came out of the stables and took the horse's reins off him as Kerrass moved further into the courtyard before coming to a halt.

He wasn't meeting our eyes which is always a danger sign, a signal for when Kerrass isn't doing well in and of himself.

“I uh...” I heard myself speak and took a step closer to him before sighing. Then I walked closer and held the box out. It was not light. “We took delivery of your new sword.”

Kerrass reached out slowly without looking and took the box awkwardly. There was a strange feeling in the air. Not just the overall tension, but there was a gulf between the two of us. The same gulf that had been in existence since we had left Brenna and like then, I desperately wanted to fill it. I was absolutely beside myself with the desire to find some way over the gap in order to reach this man who had saved my life so many times. Who had taught me how to be a proper, living person who knew how the world worked. I owed this man everything and it broke my heart a little that we were at odds with each other.

“Thank you.” He said, awkwardly. His voice seemed small and very far away.

We stood like that for a long moment, the two of us in the cold and both of us desperately unhappy.

I realised that he was breathing heavily. Then he forced his head up so that he could look me in the eye. It seemed to be hard, as though his skull was weighed down with stones.

Suddenly, the entire thing seemed too ridiculous for me to cope with and I felt a chuckle rise up in my throat. I couldn't help it. It got higher and higher and the more I fought it down, the more it seemed to want to come out.

This was a solemn moment. I shouldn't ruin it with my foolish antics. I needed to take stock of this moment and treat it with the respect that it deserved.

Odd how I can remember this thoguht process so clearly.

Then I saw that Kerrass had realised what was going on in my head. His mouth twitched towards a smile and that was the only little goad that I needed. Suddenly the laughter erupted.

Kerrass grinned, then my laughter was getting worse.

“Ah Kerrass.” I reached out and gripped him by the shoulder. “What fools have we become.” I pulled the astonished Witcher into a hug. Somewhere I registered that he had let the box fall to the ground as he hugged me back.

“Missed you Brother.” He whispered in my ear.

And just like that. I had my friend back. I rather thought I heard someone whooping. I've always suspected Mark of that little burst of emotion but I wouldn't swear to it.

It was not a long hug. Kerrass is not as comfortable in those situations as I am and he pulled away. I did look around then in time to notice a suspicious gleam in several eyes. Emma even turned away briefly.

“Freddie,” Kerrass brought my attention back to him. “Freddie, I'm so very sorry. If you will let me, I would like to explain. But I did not do right by you and if you ask me to leave then I will.”

“Fuck Kerrass. I don't know.” I felt the joke coming before I decided on it. “I mean, Ariadne only has so many guest rooms and quite a few of them are full.”

Kerrass stared at me in horror before he realised I was joking and he grinned sheepishly. He was tired and miserable. It would normally not take him as long to pick up on a joke like that.

“Do not be rude Freddie.” Ariadne appeared at my elbow, whether literally or not I don't know. “You know as well as I do that there is room a plenty.”

“Madame.” Kerrass turned to her in the attitude of a man who has some things that he needed to say. I could see myself mirrored in his eyes for a while there. He had screwed up his courage to apologise to me. Then he was going to apologise to Ariadne. Then he was going to let things fall where they may.

“Madame,” he began again. “When I was last here there were angry words between us. I deserved your anger then for the wrong that I did you and the harm I was part of in...”

“Oh shush Kerrass.” Ariadne smiled. “As I'm coming to learn, Families argue occasionally. I will not deny that I was angry, but I was angry on someone else's behalf rather than on my own. You are forgiven. Welcome home.”

For a moment there, it looked as though Kerrass was some kind of puppet and that his strings had been cut. His face threatened to crumple in on itself as the full weight of what Ariadne had said seemed to strike home. Then he stared up into the sky and turned away for a moment, looking out the gate.

“Actually,” he said after a long while. “I would be grateful for a bath and to drop off some laundry. But then I was wondering if Freddie could come out to play?” He grinned and for all the time that I had known him. That was the first time that I thought I caught a glimpse of what he had been like as a child.

“Play?” Ariadne frowned, not recognising the childish nature of the question.

“I have a nearby campsite prepared and I was hoping....”

“Ah, you mean the shepherd's hut.”

Kerrass frowned. “Yes. Freddie and I have some catching up to do and I was....” He looked up at the sky again. “I was kind of wanting to have a do-over. Where we arrived back here the way I had originally meant to bring him here. As a returning hero delivering your betrothed into your arms or something.”

“Or “something” is right.” Ariadne's eyes gleamed although I could tell that she as amused by the idea. “In the meantime, you want to take Freddie off, get drunk and gossip don't you.”

Kerrass looked sheepish.

“I will have a bath prepared and sort you out with some supplies.” Ariadne told him “Now can I have a hug too?”

Kerrass laughed and a Vampire embraced a Witcher. I know it's not unprecedented. The tales of Lord Geralt's friendship with Regis the Higher Vampire are strong in everyone's mind. But even then I thought it was special. Ariadne vanished off somewhere to sort out a bath for Kerrass.

Emma and Kerrass embraced. She said something in his ear that I did not catch and did not intrude upon. It seemed as though it was kind of... well.... none of my business.

Kerrass then went on to try and shake Mark's hand. But got pulled in for a bear hug instead. Mark can be a weird man sometimes.

Yes, I just teased a Cardinal of the Eternal Flame. Deal with it.

We rode out a couple of hours later. In the end though, we were forced to take a small mule with us as it became impossible to carry everything that we were going to need with us. Fodder for the three animals, warming blankets for the three animals after Kerrass had reassured everyone that there was shelter for them all. There was also a bunch of food for the pair of us as well as several bottles of a kind of apple wine that Ariadne had originally intend to be used by Kerrass during his initial period of being a guest. But as that time was much curtailed now, she reasoned that they would all be better off with us.

Kerrass' fondness for apple based alcohol is becoming well known throughout the world now and, I'm told, people often try to butter him up with the gift of some kind of bottle of this or that. He does not deny this and enjoys these gifts when they come his way. But it won't mean he charges any less for his services. Just to warn you.

We also brought our weapons with us as well as the large box that Kerrass had been handed. We rode along in silence for a long while. Not for any particular reason but I think we both needed that time to kind of relax back into the rhythm of the thing. I, certainly, was stiff from the weeks of staying still and out of the saddle. An occupational hazard when you spend time out of the saddle during the winter. Normally I would try and build up to re-starting my riding after a period of time, but that first hour in the saddle is always desperately unpleasant as your body tries to remember how it used to do all of this kind of thing.

For his part, Kerrass rode along, his eyes wandering around and looking at the scenery. He looked.... The closest that I could put it would be that he looked the way he had when we had come down out of the North and he had been able to take his potions and elixirs after being deprived of them at the hands of the cult of the First-Born. He looked as though a weight had been lifted from his shoulders and he looked around as though he was seeing the scenery for the first time. Properly taking things in.

We had been riding in single file, falling into the old pattern with Kerrass in the lead and myself following with the mule bringing up the rear behind me. The sun was still out and the air was bitterly cold. Much colder than it had been in Ariadne's enclosure and manor. Leaving me wondering if she did something to make the humans feel more comfortable.

But we came to the end of the lane and turned to one side into a wider, much more travelled avenue where the snow was flattened into the ground. You could see wheel ruts, boot prints and hoof marks on the road showing places where riders had been carrying messages this way and that. Where people had gone visiting and taken small amounts of things in an effort to sell them to the, often surprisingly lucrative, winter markets. But the wider road meant that I could move up to ride alongside Kerrass.

He was still looking around and watching the countryside roll by.

“Beautiful spot your missus has chosen.” He commented finally.

“It's not bad.” I replied. “I look forward to exploring it properly at some point.”

He grunted at that.

“I mean,” I continued, “a landscape covered in snow is certainly beautiful in a stark, isolated kind of way. But it always makes me think of the Eternal Frost. I'm beginning to look forward to some colour, you know what I mean?”

“I do.” Kerrass admitted with a slight smile.

“And added to that, it's fucking cold.”

Kerrass laughed. “Not far though.”

“Where are we going?”

“There's a small shepherd's cottage just along the way.” Kerrass told me. “An outpost for when the herds are far and wide but it gets shut down when the herd has to be moved back to the farms ready for being moved into shelter. We stayed there the night before we got into Ariadne's manor, do you not remember?”

“I don't, I'm afraid.” I admitted. “I was kind of in a world of my own at the time.”

Kerrass didn't respond to that. “But I came back here to sit and think after Ariadne kicked me out. There's a small barn attached which, I'm told, they use to shelter sick sheep and things in the middle of the summer and it will keep the horses warm. There's a hearth, a wood store and a couple of pallets for sleeping in. It's not large but...” He shrugged.

I nodded and let the world roll by for a minute or two. There was a building sense of things in the air. The weight of unsaid words hanging over the pair of us that would need to emerge before we could move one and this was one of those times.

“I uh...” Kerrass began, proving me right. “I had planned to go back to it tonight if you and Ariadne rejected me. If you had called me back to Angral in order to chastise me and send me away, never to speak to me or to see me again.” His face darkened for a moment. Then he laughed. “Seems silly now if I'm honest.”

A few different responses to that came to my mind. I wanted to tell him that such a matter really was silly. That we would never have turned him away to that extent. But that would be a lie. If he had come back sooner then there would have been the very real possibility that he would have been chased away from Angral.

I think he knows that as well.

There was another short period of silence as we rode along. This time it was me that cracked under the pressure of the silence.

“So How've you been?” I wondered.

Kerrass jerked as if he had been startled out of some kind of internal thought process.

“I've been fine. Busy.” He said. “Very busy. The world is changing Freddie. Changing a lot. We are still feeling the effects of that Conjunction of Spheres that The Empress was talking about. It turns out that one of the reasons that relatively few new monsters have been seen is because the world shuts down over the winter and a lot of those new monsters are based in the cold and are therefore more active in the Winter.”

“So they've been asleep in the heights of summer and coming out as the weather turns cold.” I mused. It did make a great deal of sense.

“Yes. Not only are their rumours of ice giants in the Kestrel, blue and Dragon Mountains respectively. But there are lots of new iterations of existing monsters. Ice trolls being the most common. But there are also Nekkers that seem to thrive on the cold and I was up towards the mountains a week, maybe two weeks ago and I saw a distant flying creature. A lot like a Wyvern or a Fork tail. White like a Slyzard but it had more of the physical characteristics of a Wyvern. The ruff and the horns on the head and things.”

“Sounds nasty.”

“It will be. My working theory is that they came through after the conjunction. But for many it was too warm to survive so many just expired on the spot. Appearing like normal creatures to passers-by. Or they fell in those areas that have become deserted by the wars.”

“They fell in the no-man's lands and places stripped of resources you mean.”

“Yes and to a lay-man, they would have just been mistaken for any other variety of this or that. So experts weren't called for. But there were some of these new creatures that fell in the colder areas. In Skellige that we know about, but also in the mountains during that period when they had the time to properly get the cold and therefore had time to breed and properly explore their new habitat and get used to it all. These are the creatures that are now beginning to spread their wings.... Literally and figuratively, and fly off into the world to see what's out here.”

I grunted at this.

“I think... That it will be this year, maybe next year or at the latest, the year after that, where people will start to make reports of villagers and isolated farms being destroyed in the depths of winter. As it is, I suspect that some people in Northern Kaedwen in the like are losing odd sheep and cattle to the creatures. But soon, they will start to migrate and then we will know that we are up againt it.”