[Hestia POV]

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Prince Edgy was currently chopping up some veggies to add to whatever the Jerk Lord was cooking. His Psychic manipulation was impressive, no matter how much he sulked and pretended to hate everything and everyone. There was no escaping his true feelings from me, though. He was as soft as an Alcremie on the inside. At least he was able to contain his emotions unlike literally all the others of this so-called team.

Princess Butt Fish, the mischievous brute that loved to prank me, was one of the louder ones, both emotionally and verbally. Whether is was crying about getting her cookies taken away or an explosion of happiness from receiving them again, she just couldn't stay quiet. To make it worse, I couldn't do anything back because of her freakish strength. Like seriously, how the fuck can she casually the lift up that Steel version of Snorlax?! With one hand too! Princess Metallic Guzzlord and her mute friend, Princess Emotional Abyss, were friendly enough when I wasn't trying to be friends with the others. But the flying sword creeped me out no matter how nice she was. Everyone had a distinct emotional tag, a unique tell for me to recognize them from others. Her tell was a literal void in space, a crack in the emotional dimension that overlay the world. I gave me chills just thinking about the nothingness that she was.

Jerk Lord was just that, lord of the jerks. He would never let me have fun or fall for my cuteness. And how did he always know when I was going to try something? I could never get away with any joke because of him. It's lead to Princess Butt Fish kicking my ass several times before I could even do anything! Damn cheaters. I really don't know why my loves follows him around like a knight their lord.

Ahhh, my love. My sweet, powerful, kind, amazing Prince Charming. What did I do to come across such a fine specimen of Pokémon? Besides be my amazing self, of course. Everything he did was simply... Great! Whether it was training his rippling muscles, stretching his magnificent wings, or dreamily eating his meals, I could and did watch him all day. The fact that he was playing hard-to-get, my favorite game, made me even more sure that he was the one for me. I can only imagine how delightful our lives would be when he realized how perfect we are for each other. I wonder if our kids would be as breathtaking as he or astounding as me. Being such a power couple, they would no doubt inherit his personality and my looks.

Ahhhh, a girl could only dream of such a perfect love story. Maybe if I-

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"Ow, who the fuck threw that!" I shouted as a wooden spoon bonked me and bounced towards Jerk Lord's waiting hand.

"I did, ya little shit. It's time for dinner, we're waiting for you," he said unceremoniously. Would it hurt him to be gentle with poor little me? I hopped up onto a chair at the table, sitting directly across from my love. Ahhh, he knew just how to calm me down and make me relax. Really, he was the perfect one for me. I heard some giggling and snickering coming from one end of the table, turning to see Butt Fish and Metallic Guzzlord whispering to each other. When they saw me looking, they burst out in laughter.

"What's so funny?" I asked heatedly. I hated when they made fun of me.

"Oh, nothing," Butt Fish answered with a wide grin.

"We just couldn't help but worry you might get full before touching your food," Metallic Guzzlord quipped.

"What do you mean? I haven't even had a snack," I asked cautiously, knowing fully well that they were up to something.

"It's just that," Metallic Guzzlord started but was interrupted by Butt Fish.

"You're eyes have been busy feasting on Ra all day."

Both of them burst out in laughter once more, this time joined by Prince Edgy. Ra began to choke on his food, causing me to glare at the duo.

"You made him choke! How could you!" I shouted at both of them. How dare they cause harm to my beloved.

Jerk Lord helped Ra with his situation before addressing all of us. "Settle down, all of you. Girls, keep your petty squabbles away from the dinner table. If it becomes an issue again, I'm going to cut snacks for the three of you."

Tears formed in my eyes. I was getting bullied and then being punished for it? Don't they care about me?

"If the two of you start shit up unprovoked again, I'll make sure to join the next week of training and personally improve what you two have been slacking on," he said, directing this at the two mean girls. The girls both looked horrified at that threat. Was training with him really that bad? He's only ever had me do some agility and energy manipulation exercises. How could that be so bad?

But even more importantly, he defended me. Jerk Lord actually said something against his two precious angels. Maybe he does care about me?

"Hey," he said, looking directly at me. "Don't worry about them, they're just teasing you because they know you like Ra."

I looked down, embarrassed beyond anything I'd experienced before. "They're so mean about it. I just hope it doesn't ruin any chance I have."

"Oh, don't worry about that," he said. Maybe he wasn't such a jerk after all...

"You don't have any chance at all. Ra is in love with Tetsu."

Ra once again choked on his food and Metallic Guzzlord's face went blank. Edgy and Butt Fish were laughing their asses off, while the floating Emotional Abyss gave off a chortle of her own. I stood there, frozen in place. What did... Did he just...

"HE'S FUCKING WHAT?! WITH HER? AAAAGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!"