Hurricane force winds of shame and sorrow ripped at Vehru's soul, not only because Mama knew what she did, but because the stress would only further weaken her in this condition. Deep fury built within Vehru.

Her witness had done this.

"Mama, we've talked before about the things I have to do."

"Have to do?" Her voice hitched. "Believe me, Vehru, I think often of the things you do. It's no secret I can't accept it. But how can you justify what you've done to this family? How many other families have you hurt like this?"

Vehru knelt down at her mother's feet and took her hands, but the woman ripped them away, crying now. Tears fell down Vehru's cheeks as well. "There's a reason. In the end, it will make everything better. I can't explain it right now."

Her mother clutched her chest. "I saw it with my own eyes," she whispered. "I saw what you did!"

Vehru sat back on her heels, puzzled.

Her mother closed her eyes and transmitted the memory to her, so Vehru could see herself and the humans she'd fought through what was clearly a hidden camera.

"Fuck!" Vehru shouted, jumping to her feet. "That insolent–"

"Don't." Her mother struggled to her feet, looking so frail. "I won't hear a word about any of those poor people."

Vehru didn't need to watch what her mother had sent her. She remembered very well throwing that scientist against the wall, choking Jace, using the neuroweb to hurt her witness. Though she tried to close it out, one part stuck with her. Hearing her own voice sent chills down her spine.

"It doesn't matter where you are, I can use the Neuroweb to hurt you. It's in your son too. Continue to fuck with me, and I will do it to him."

"I'm sorry you had to witness that," Vehru said.

"I don't recognize you." Mama covered her face as she wept and then looked down to where Levi slept, placing her hand to his.

How did they even know about her mother or how to reach her?

Vehru had told Morfrain that she appreciated the power of a desperate human. It was what she'd always counted on, that this desperate family would be like the others who came before them and have the strength to do what needed to be done. But Vehru had not anticipated this.

This was not something she had planned for. She did not like being fooled.

It was a mistake to give Jace the ability to send any messages back to Lumiea. They had used her kindness of giving him a link to his son to betray her.

"This is nothing new, Mama," Vehru said. "Do you know how many children were hurt on the planets I conquered? How many were separated from their parents?" Vehru struggled to force her voice out of her thick throat. "But you speak up for this one little boy. Where were you for the others?"

"I can't stop you from conquering entire planets. I've tried." Her mother held the child's hand tightly. "I can save this one child. He matters as much as an entire world. Ask his parents and they'll tell you it's true. He's right here where I can see him. I can hold on and not let go." Her mother worked her arms around him and whispered apologies while he slept.

Instinctively, Vehru started to dim her emotions because she had been relying upon shutting them down so often. Though she tried to carry her guilt and show some respect to the people she hurt, several times recently, she'd had to turn her emotions off. Vehru caught herself this time. She couldn't do that to her own mother. She had to face her. "I'm not going to hurt him, Mama."

"You already have."

Aeryn's screams for her son ten years ago built in her mind like it was happening again. The terror freezing Rory in place when Vehru had threatened Levi flooded her mind. The woman had lived two lives because of Vehru and didn't have a single name to call her own anymore. But in both lives, this boy meant the world to her. Thinking of doing this to millions of parents over multiple planets overwhelmed her to the point of not feeling it most of the time. But Vehru felt it now with Levi here before her and her mother's arm wrapped around him.

"I have data that can show how effective my methods are. The purity of consciousness is higher when I can convince a few important people to do difficult things. They're the sacrifice for their worlds. Purer consciousness proves the world is better off overall."

Her mother gasped. "Can you really claim to understand the nature of the human spirit? You do not know what is best for billions of people, Vehru. If I did something while raising you to make you think you were capable of that then I'm sorry to you and all the people you hurt."

"Do you know what will happen if I try to quit? Do you know what they'll do to our home world?"

Anguish twisted her features. "No one will do anything to you if you help this one boy. Please, Vehru. I live every day of my miserable life holding your crimes in my heart. Give me this one mercy."

"There's something I'm trying to do, Mama. It will be better for everyone in the end." She lowered her voice. "It's the only chance I'll get to do something good for once. I've set everything into motion. This child's parents…" Vehru closed her eyes. "I need them to play their part."

"First you were saving our planet by being a commander of the federation." Mama shook her head. "Now you're going to save all worlds that are slated to be conquered? It only requires one more evil. One more evil. One more. Every time, it's only one more."

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"His parents will never make me use that web in his brain. I just need the threat. They're hard to control." The moment Jace sniffed a whiff of freedom he'd erupt like a volcano and create massive chaos of her carefully cultivated plans. As terrible as that sounded, it was her Witness who worried her even more. Whatever that woman did, it would be careful and clever. Like this. Levi ensured that the two did what Vehru needed them to do. And in the end it would be better for the whole family. As awful as she was, she was better than Morfrain and her visions of this program were better than the current conquest system.

"Stop it, Vehru. I can see you rationalizing right now. You've done enough to these people. Let their son go. Take this out of his brain right now."

Those conniving bastards. Her witness had warned her Vehru had made a mistake. A big fucking mistake if she remembered correctly. Well, they were the ones making mistakes now. They just didn't know how badly they needed Vehru. Ultimately, Vehru was to blame. She'd let them tug on their leash too many times and they managed to stick their necks far enough out to ruin things.

Vehru had a choice. Right now, she could shut down the parts of her mind that made her feel as if she'd rather die than hurt her mother. What if it really killed the woman this time?

"I knew there would come a day when you could no longer bring yourself to love me," Vehru said.

"Oh," her mother wailed. "I love you so much it's literally killing my soul. Even now, my girl. If only you knew love like that. Maybe it would save you."

Vehru looked down to Levi's young face as he slept and imagined how it would feel to grow up without a mother.

"I can't do everything you want me to do, Mama. Not everything."

----------------------------------------

Vehru could never unsee the look in her mother's eyes, as if the hurt carried by all the people she'd ever harmed dwelled within that stare.

When she'd returned to Earth, she knew she needed time, even though that was not something she had. By relegating tasks, she managed to carve out two hours for herself. When that period of time ended, she would shut off her feelings if she had to in order to continue with her mission. First, she'd planned to talk to Jace, deciding that it was actually easier to face him than her Witness. Perhaps, because Vehru had known the love of a mother so well that she could more deeply understand what she'd done to the woman than the man.

But Jace had been receiving treatments for the wounds sustained in battle in the day before. So Vehru did not wait to get started. She guzzled two bottles of vodka and was working on a third when she collapsed onto the ground. Lying there, she heard her own voice running on repeat in her mind, while she saw her mother weeping.

Every time her hatred tried to turn to those responsible for her mother's suffering today, it immediately circled back to her. Vehru had done it. She'd also been careless enough to let the deed reach her mother and to be recorded in the first place. Perhaps the only thing worse than being evil was also being a failure.

Her two hours had nearly come to an end when the door snapped off its hinges. Ordinarily, Vehru would have detected someone approaching long ago, but when she went offline, she dulled her senses to that of a normal human. No need to wonder who would have the audacity to destroy her door and enter unannounced. Never had anyone done something so ridiculous.

But Vehru was too drunk and miserable to move. What did it matter for Jace to see her like this? Hell, this was likely more of her own self-sabotage. It was a self-inflicted punishment to let someone witness her shame. Or could it have been a plea for forgiveness? A pathetic cry for help? Vehru almost started laughing at her own spinning thoughts.

"Are you serious?" Contempt dripped from Jace's voice.

He walked closer and then kicked the nearly empty bottle from her loose grip.

"Disgusting." He knelt and whispered in her ear, his voice rippling through her spinning world. "You have always gluttonously indulged in your undeserved self-pity."

Daggers carved through the softest places in her heart, weaknesses in her synthetic armor that she'd failed to see until he cut right through them. It took her breath away.

"Take your victory and go," Vehru said. "You two managed to hurt me. It's an incredible accomplishment. You should feel very proud."

"Why shouldn't I take the time to gloat when you enjoy doing it so much?"

"You know it's a mistake to anger me."

"The only thing I can say about you, Vehru, is that you're not going to hurt me because I hurt you. Not when you know you deserve it. You hurt me for much more sinister and unnatural reasons."

Through her bleary vision, she watched him rise and looked down on her.

"I want the web out of my son's brain," Jace said.

Vehru closed her eyes.

"I'm sure your mother will want to know it's gone."

Apparently, Vehru needed security for the next time she planned to drink herself into a coma.

"You just can't appreciate what I'm trying to accomplish," Vehru muttered, but Jace was already halfway through the door.

Vehru knew he had not left her alone, however.

Bronze eyes seemed to glow in the dim light of the hallway.

Slowly, one deliberative step at a time, her Witness approached, until her shadow fell over Vehru. "This was only the first shot."

Vehru smiled, even though she felt miserable, because it wasn't often she was impressed, even if it came at her own expense.

"It doesn't benefit me to war mindlessly against you," the Witness said. "Right now you're down but you'll stand again soon. We should take this time to agree on rules of engagement. We leave the innocent out of it."

A slow chuckle fell from Vehru's lips. "You're even better than I'd imagined."

Her Witness frowned at her, looking as disgusted as her husband had. "Agree to it."

"Oh, fine. Your son and my mother are off limits. We understand the consequences for crossing this line in the future."

"Theo too. He's not a soldier."

Vehru pushed herself to a sitting position, despite how the world spun. "He is not innocent. He's going to fight this war against us. As a bioengineer, you should know that there's more than one way to battle."

Quiet followed for several seconds. "You know what it's like to be underestimated. I suggest you not do that to me."

The woman started to walk away from her, which managed to actually make Vehru feel small, because apparently in this state, she wasn't even worth fighting.

"I don't know what to call you." Vehru surprised herself by actually saying it. The alcohol had lowered her inhibition. "Rory or Aeryn or Witness."

The greater surprise than Vehru asking the question was when she received an answer. "Rory. It's what Earth knows me as." Rory hesitated. "Do you know why you drink?"

Yes. No. Vehru did and she didn't.

"You feel human when you're lying face down on the ground. You're trying to convince yourself there's something still good in you, since you're decent enough to feel bad about what you do. Just remember..." Cool, calm rage solidified in Rory's eyes. "You're not human. You're soulless. And you're too cowardly to admit it like Morfrain has. That's why I respect you even less."

Hot tears gathered in Vehru's eyes. "You've always seen the best in people. Do you think there could ever be in any good in me again?"

Rory's eyes shifted down. "You think that you can become powerful enough to be unconquerable this time. How can you ever be good, when you have no interest in it? You don't even care about my answer. All you want to know is whether you can convince me to believe you."

Her Witness left Vehru alone with her empty bottles and the empty room. Her heart, though--soulless as it may be--was full and bursting with pain she did not fully understand.