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When that Australian broke the world ( A HWFWM fanfic)
Si quis nihil perdere potest, is liber vocari potest

Si quis nihil perdere potest, is liber vocari potest

I will loot that troll. Burning it would be a waste. If it yields something, the better it’ll be. I want abilities if only for a few days. Or can I bequeath somebody essences or stones? They wouldn’t honor my will. Can I just mail them to friends? I am also going to loot the people. I have coins left.

Whom first? The people. Somebody might come. The nausea is returning. I take another potion.

» Stop right now.

Had Dr. Kowalski not done a full scale healing of all ailments, a heart attack would have ended everything there and then. A great calm overcomes me. Is that the feeling of nothing left to lose?

I hear a thump behind me and turn around. A man is standing there. Just a man. I don’t care who he is or what he looks like. I do care what he wants. He preempts me.

UM: My clients need you to render them some services

P: You may have missed that, but unless they need them today or tomorrow, you have come too late

UM: That mishap. A healing potion won't work, because radiation is a wound a curse and a poison magically speaking. You need a good cleansing potion. Something the Network is traditionally bad at.

Hope is coming back at the speed of light. I must show on my face.

P: You have a deal. But I have a team. But why did you want me to stop?

UM: You were about to do a looting ritual in so unsophisicated a manner that you may squander an opportunity my patrons need for you.

P: I suppose your guarantee for my compliance is a recording you have made here.

UM: They need somebody with intelligence and reliability. And somebody alive, obviously.

He tosses me a leather sack.

UM: To expand your storage. They need you to carry some devices in your storage space until they tell you a place you need to go to and deploy them. And before you ask, no they cannot go because they are not human. And I have a permanent other task.

He blurs into action to sting me in the left thigh with a device that looks like a smaller black version of the picks to puncture cans of condensed milk to put into your coffee with.

P: Ouch. I appreciate intellectually that if you wanted me dead, you’d just do nothing, but that hurt.

UM: It would have hurt more with a warning. This enables a very close connection between you and the device this is a submodule of.

He does a looting ritual with more bells and whistles than I knew to be possible. The result is indeed an Essence cube. It is an odd one. It is transparent but it shows things to the side of the cube when you try to look at things behind it. Or sometimes it shows the magnifying effect of an Einstein ring.

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P: Is that a mass essence?

UM: As far as I know there is no such thing. This is a Dimension Essence. Now do the ritual. We don’t have all day. Well, we do have all day, but I want to have dinner at a civilized time.

He could take it himself. Even if he has a full set, this thing must be valuable.

P: How about you giving me the potions now?

UM: Too early. You just took a healing potion. That blocks related potions from working.

A very important warning.

P: First the Essence or the Stone?

UM: You have been doing this wrong. Using Stones before you have all Essences makes for a worse set. And before you ask, I have no idea how to undo the damage.

This man is drastically overestimating the degree to which I care about that. I do an essence ritual.

It goes well. The expected racial evolution happens and I feel something slipping out of me. Now, some people may say something poetic about birds mating in flight. I just say that they have merged and I take the result.

While I am thus occupied I notice him doing a ritual to a device that looks like a tricorder, which he has attached the bloody probe to.

That is the time the prompt symptoms return with a vengeance. I dismiss all clothing to not soil it by projectile vomiting. I need to endure this. The real damage will happen only in a few days.

The man is holding his nose and retreating. Upwind, though I would determine that only after the fact.

UM: Don’t worry. I am not going away. In fact I am putting down the equipment for you to carry and the potions now. There is no need to come close to you or for you to come closer to me.

That suits me just fine. Essences seem to worsen the effects of radiation. I am secreting a kind of oily rancid substance. It is disgusting. I am close to thanking the gods for my hulk form not sharing my normal hair. Getting this stuff out of it would be a nightmare. It takes twenty minutes.

UM: Are you better?

P: Yes, this is disgusting.

I take one of the potions. First things first.

I have options now. After a few attempts I manage to synchronize a teleport upwards and sidewards with going to a smaller hulk form to get rid of the residue. I still need to brush my teeth. Often. But this has rid me of the worst.

UM: Impressive and I see you got teleport. You can keep the Stone anyway. I am payed to deliver them.

P: With pleasure.

UM: Your device contains a copy of the instructions.

He is still keeping a lot of distance.

UM: But repeat after me. First you will take in the cans, which are specialised single use dimensional containers. Second you will store the cell phone. Third you will take the box with the two Awakening Stones. Fourth you will store the device

That device really looks like a tricorder. I say nothing. I have options now, better not ruin them. Have you tried to arrest a teleporter for murder?

UM: Fifth you will use your device when you are unobserved. Repeat your instructions …

--

The look on the faces of Dejan, Ulrike and Thomas as I fed them the potions will move my heart forever. I might have surpressed a few tears more or less successfully.