For Shark, Cerid dropping in like this had to be a sign that it was finally time to face what had been weighing on them since the day they had left their homeland behind.

After Cerid was settled in Shark’s small but cozy apartment, they turned right back around and went to Dorothea’s place. They found her exactly as expected: rocking on the porch swing with a large, fluffy blanket swallowing her up and making her look like a sad ball with a head. “Alrighty, Thea. Tell me what’s on your mind,” they said as they plopped beside her.

Dorothea scooted to make more room. “He was completely right.”

“About what?”

“Me being a terrible person.”

“He said you were cruel, not terrible.”

“Helpful, Sharkie,” she said flatly. “There’s no difference. Not in my case.”

“And why do you agree with him?” That was the distinction that mattered.

She was silent for a while, and Shark listened as the old swing hinges squealed each time they arced forward. It hadn’t used to do that. Small things reminded them how much time flew. “Cerid was willing to push himself to death for people he didn’t know and had no reason whatsoever to care about. No matter what you’ve told me about him, that still stands.”

True. Despite how he’d slighted Shark, Cerid wasn’t someone they could hate. “And what’s that got to do with you?” they asked gently, letting Dorothea sort out her own conscience as she spoke.

“That’s just the thing! Since the day… Ever since Mom died, I’d always thought it all had nothing to do with me, that none of them had a right to my help if they were just going to keep tearing each other apart.” She paused and looked up at the slow trickle of snow that fluttered to the ground, erasing footprints to create a feeling of clean emptiness. “But…”

“But?”

“I guess I… There’s no point to me living like I am now. If I’m going to die young anyway—and let’s be realistic about that—then should I do something useful for others by killing myself through using my magic to my limits? Or should I just while the rest of my life away here talking about the same problem over and over? It’s just… Why am I even here, Shark?” She looked up at them with plaintive helplessness.

“I can’t tell you what to do, and I sure as shit have no idea what the meaning of life is."

“I know, I know,” she sighed, turning forward again. “It’s something every person has to answer for themselves."

“But, if it helps you make a choice…” No matter what, this was something they had to do. “I want to go back to Sacer.”

“What?” Dorothea’s eyes widened with panic. “Why?”

Shark smiled. “Don’t worry. This is my home now. But Thea, I want to see my parents again. I want to close that door so I can really move on. It’s been five years and I still think about them every day. I have to do this, and I think you have some choices of your own to make. Either way I’m gonna say we need to go back with Cerid.”

“Gods…” Dorothea muttered, looking shocked and exhausted. “Nothing today has gone as expected.”

“At least you can say your life is interesting for once.”

She laughed. “True.” Her gaze lowered as it always did when she was seriously contemplating. “To be honest, I’m scared of what might happen. But I’ll learn something, right? Besides,” she continued, tone becoming brusque as she turned towards action, “I’d never leave you to face your family on your own. Of course I’m coming with you.”

Shark grinned and let out a joyful laugh. “Aw, Thea. I love ya.”

This book was originally published on Royal Road. Check it out there for the real experience.

“Yeah, yeah. Love you too.” She smiled gently and stood, bunching the blanket in her arms. “We need to pack. I hope this fits in my bag.”

“Trust me, where we’re going you won’t need it.” Shark’s memory was coming alive with dreams of sticky summers and lazy breezes. A woman standing at the stove humming as she made a ruthlessly spicy chili, a man crafting lame rhymes to give words to her melody as his large hands kneaded a bread cooked with beer, each slice later slathered with butter and honey. Laughter between the three of them, something pure held in these mundane moments.

Painful dreams, those, but precious all the same.

“You took Cerid to your place, right?” Dorothea asked.

“How’d you know?”

“It’s not like you would just leave him out in the snow.”

“I thought about it.” Cerid… He’d literally broken his way back into their life, and the sight of him covered in blood, the light fading from his eyes, and the mere thought of losing him… So many things had come rushing back.

Dorothea took a breath. “In any case… Tell him I’ll revive his comrades. But I won’t promise anything else.” She heaved an exaggerated sigh. “Can’t believe this. Anyways, I’ll pack and then let the council know. They’ll stand by until we’re done in Sacer.”

“What’s going to happen after today, Thea?” An attack on the neutral nation was a direct infraction against the Treaty of Blending that had been formed between the three nations at the conclusion of the War of Blending two decades prior. That couldn’t go unrecognized.

She looked grim. “I don’t know. But we’ll figure it out. For now just go home, pack and deal with Cerid. I’ll come pick you up when I’m ready to go.”

“Will do. Thanks, Thea.”

Shark was for some reason surprised to find Cerid still at their place. He’d popped up so suddenly it felt like he could disappear with the same ease. But the boy was pacing the floor in a tight circle, arms folded behind his back and face scrunched up with impatience and worry.

“Well?!” he demanded the moment Shark stepped inside.

They deliberately took sweet time in locking up and unlacing their boots. “She’ll bring your friends back.”

Cerid put his face in his hands. “Oh thank the Gods…!”

“Yup.” Shark drifted through the entranceway and towards their room to pack. A spare outfit was stuffed into a bag, and on top of it were daily grooming products and the small box they stored their jewelry in at night. It felt more like packing for a sleepover than what Shark imagined would be an epic and emotional confrontation with the ones who had disavowed them.

Cerid, who had kept his respectful, nervous distance while Shark worked, piped up with uncertainty. “You were not hurt, correct?”

“Naw, you busting in kinda interrupted anything that might’ve gone down.”

“Good.” He jumped as Shark threw some spare clothes across the room.

“Get changed in the bathroom.” Looking at the not even fully dried blood on his shredded clothes just made Shark want to hold him and rejoice in the fact that he was alive. They hated it.

“Thank you.” Cerid gave them a wide berth as he skirted past, and that gave Shark a chance to discreetly eye him. Most Creeds had the same traits, with light-green hair and eyes like the dashes of buttercups that formed sunbeams on Sacer’s streetsides. Since they’d last met, Cerid had started to wear his hair a bit longer, and his eyes were wearier than ever before.

He was here.

Shark bowed their head and put their hands over their mouth to trap their next words. “I’m so glad you’re okay.” How many times had he crossed their mind over the years, Shark wondering if he’d met his end?

“Pardon?” Cerid poked his head out from the doorway and tilted it in a way Shark had always thought was cute. Damn them for still thinking it was cute.

Shark dropped their hands and turned to glare. “A word of warning, Cerid.”

“Yes…?” His eyes widened as Shark stepped closer to loom over him.

“Know this.” They smiled coldly and leaned in to captivate Cerid’s wary gaze. “If you or your people try to use Thea, I’ll turn every ounce of my power against you. Got it?”

Cerid shivered. “I understand,” he whispered.

Shark smiled like they had just told a funny joke. “Good! Now sit tight, my esteemed guest. Thea’ll be comin’ for us when she’s ready.”

Cerid looked at his feet, then into Shark’s eyes. “Sh… Shark, I—”

“Don’t,” they snapped. They spun around and slammed their bedroom door shut behind them. The internal contradiction was awful. They wanted all of and none of his words. Even if they and Cerid tried to talk things out, what was there to say? Cerid had chosen his reputation over their relationship five years ago.

And now they’d be in Sacer by the end of the day, right back where they’d started.