Memory transcription subject: Captain Sovlin, Federation Fleet Command

Date [standardized human time]: September 28, 2136

The humans’ actions in the past few days were a showcase of why I was right about them. It brought me relief to see such vindication.

The dishonorable tactics persisted into our home system, sneaking their transports into orbit through diversions. The good, old predatory ruse: these hunter bastards never changed. It baffled me why they didn’t commence an orbital raid on the planet, to soften up our populace. Then, I realized that the arrogant apes thought they could get people to come with them, willingly.

The Terrans’ supposed rescue attempts targeted children, who were the most susceptible to suggestion. I’m sure they predicted the stampede casualties a ruthless invasion would cause. Every clip I saw was the image of death, and humans baiting their livestock into submission with false kindness.

The higher-ups wouldn’t allow ships like mine to attack human positions, due to the fact that they overlapped with civilian dwellings. I didn’t want any innocents to die, but I knew it was a kindness to spare them from predatory possession. This was our lone chance to regain control in a timely manner. The only way to get any terrified innocents out alive.

We should’ve taken the shot, before the predators got more entrenched. Who knows what brainwashing techniques they’re employing on our people.

Prime Minister Piri lost it with me the third time I pressed her with a bombing scheme. She said the collateral damage was “unacceptable”, and was livid at the proposal. My ship was reassigned to a patrol route by our largest colony for an indefinite duration. Barring a secondary invasion, I was out of the game.

When a message came from the Union government, after several days of silence, I couldn’t play it quick enough.

“I hope we’re being recalled to the cradle. Piri’s had us in timeout for long enough,” I growled.

Zarn closed the soundproofed door to the briefing room behind us. “It must be stressful, knowing that they’re on your own world. I knew humans were a conquering species, but it’s another thing to see them in action.”

“Why hasn’t the fucking Federation come to our aid? The cowards must be scared to raise a claw in our defense,” I sneered. “They’re just watching! It’ll be them the humans come for next.”

“Perhaps they think the predatory expansion will end with us. A foolhardy notion. Their kind always want more,” the doctor said.

“I know, Zarn. Shit, let’s see what humans’ve done to cities and children this time. No sense delaying.”

I cast the holopad message to the projector. Holographic footage of the Arxur raiding our homeworld flickered to life, and my spines bristled. Explosions ravaged our planet, wiping out swaths of civilians in one fell swoop. Realization washed over me like a cold shower, as the pieces began to fit into place.

It was so obvious. Of course, the predators were working together; the humans were the brains of the operation. They took out our defenses, so that the red carpet was rolled out for the other sadistic monsters. It was a matter of divvying up the cattle, and finishing off what was left of our populace.

My eyes narrowed with fury. I was so tired of seeing my world exploited by psychotic beasts, who preyed upon the helpless. The amount of death I witnessed in my career was more than anyone should have to endure. Now, billions of souls were about to be whisked away by the two freaks of the galaxy. Unless Gojid forces cheated death, the rock I called home was no more.

Why was nature so uncaring and unfair? No matter how much I tried, there was never any way that I could make the predators’ suffering match ours. Our existence was agony and terror, a living hell.

“They can’t destroy our cradle!” I spat. “It’s sacred. All those people, gone, and for what?”

Zarn’s eyes widened with sympathy. “I am sorry, sir. If there is anything I can do, please let me know.”

“Thank you. But…” I blinked away tears, watching an Arxur bite into a child’s arm. “The humans got what they wanted. I’d like to watch the end of this. Alone.”

The acting first officer swished his tail, and ambled out of the room. None of the Takkan’s warnings about humans had done any good to prevent this calamity. We hadn’t been smart enough, or fast-acting enough. This was the inevitable conclusion, wasn't it?

Squinting at my holopad, Piri had attached a note to the video. I could almost hear the prime minister’s crisp voice, and see the sternness of her expression. It must’ve been her final action, to pass this media montage to any active communications satellites.

“By the time you view this, I will already be dead. My bunker is on the brink of collapse, pelted by bomb after bomb. This message is being relayed to any high-ranking officers out of system; I hope it finds you in good health. There’s no sense addressing the brave souls stationed here.

Our fleet failed to restrain the inbound Arxur ships, with catastrophic losses. We were pre-occupied with the humans, and taking them out any time they lingered near the cradle. The Terran ships burned into the fray, as soon as we abandoned our position against their vector. There was great confusion on who to fight. We figured they planned this scenario in cooperation with the Arxur.

Then, the monkeys began attacking the grays, and broadcasting warnings to the surface. We intercepted signal after signal. It could be staged chatter, but they seemed surprised. Perhaps it was just predatory treachery, betraying an ally for the thrill. It could have been a dispute over the livestock haul.

But this is the last footage I saw. I can’t conjure a reason that such sacrifice and tenderness would stem from aggression or cruelty. Those traits are polar opposites. What a marvelous ruse, if it is one.

Please, send word to the Federation, and relate the unspeakable losses of the Gojidi Union. Beg their help. Form your own opinions…and see what is done with the humans’ prisoners.”

A flash of movement snapped my eyes back to the video. A human soldier plowed into the feasting Arxur, tackling it away from the child. The primate was missing his gun, but swung a knife at the reptilian with a vicious look. His inky pupils were dilated, and his neck veins bulged against his skin. He stepped between the Gojid and the gray, shouting at the kid to run.

The tale has been illicitly lifted; should you spot it on Amazon, report the violation.

What the fuck? Why did he intervene? I thought. Maybe he had claimed the child as his own catch, like Piri suggested…

The Terran jabbed his blade into the Arxur’s elongated nose. The gray beast roared in agony, and crunched through the human’s stomach with swift jaws. More mammalians rushed over to the kid, peppering the reptile with bullets. They carried the Gojid so…tenderly, shielding the youngling with their own bodies.

“Rescue” was one thing, but it made no sense to die for their intended cattle. I gaped at the footage, staring in silence as the scene transitioned.

A Terran fireteam were surrounded by a school, and fighting to the last. Many of the furless predators were wounded, yet they propped themselves up and kept shooting. It was as though a drug was fueling them. These broken remnants managed to eviscerate an entire Arxur capture squad, by the looks of the time lapse.

As soon as there was a moment of peace, a Gojid child raced into the open and knelt by a human’s corpse. He jabbed a claw into the predator’s stomach, sobbing in hysterics. The kid showed such feeble emotions in front of those beasts, and their lips didn’t even curve into a snarl? Two primates stooped to the ground, and…attempted to console him?

A dangerous thought crept into my brain. What if the humans did actually care for the children? What would that say about them? They’re capable of…they’re…

Every part of me screamed for a refutation. I keeled over, clutching my temples in a desperate attempt to vanquish the thought. There was no logical way to override this narrative as propaganda; it was a transmission from my own government.

“No, no, no! They’re predators. Predators don’t have feelings,” I hissed. “They took your home. They took your family. They took…”

I collapsed into a prone position, bawling. The more I considered it, the more I realized that all of my arguments circled back to humans being predators. To my trauma, and to the planetary history Zarn claimed to know like the back of his paw. Every sneaking doubt that I blocked out flowed through my mind.

The Terrans rushed to tend to the civilians on our world, asking nothing in return. The way they prioritized the children was the same as any nurturing species. They only attacked military targets, both in our home’s invasion and when striking the border outposts.

The last remnants of a bombing run allowed a medical ship to pass, as soon as it was identified. Despite my beliefs, the bombers never so much as glanced at the colony. There was also the chatter we heard on the radio frequencies, expressing sympathy for what the Arxur had done. One pilot said he wanted to negotiate, but his counterpart’s retort was that we despised them too much to listen.

I wiped a tear off my cheek. “Nobody but the Venlil ever tried to speak to humanity. I hate…hated them with all my heart.”

Crumbling to my conscience’s assault, I allowed the memories of that week to play in my mind. The delight bubbling in my chest, as I drew screams from a helpless human, was as fresh as yesterday. At the time, it made me exuberant, but now, my sole wish was to undo the cruelty. Recel was right, when he said I was behaving just like the Arxur; he was always the better of us.

What kind of a man enjoyed another creature’s pain? That wasn’t the behavior of a hero, who was better than the predators he fought. An unbearable agony clasped at my chest; it was a sickening veil of disgust and self-hatred.

I allowed myself to view the event from Marcel’s eyes, and imbued some feeling into the predator’s mindset. The captain was a cruel individual, who shocked him for the slightest movements. The days were unending agony, with no sense of time or place. He felt his own body withering away, and clung to sanity recalling the kindness of his friend.

How do you persuade someone who hates you, who has already made up their mind about you? Nothing that was said mattered, or was even brought into consideration. The officers wouldn’t allow him to speak, and punished him for deceit after his repeated claims of friendship. For the crime of looking at the glass, his eyes were bashed in and clawed.

Marcel lost interest in everything, and became non-responsive. There was the briefest glimmer of hope, seeing his friend Slanek greet him with empathy and care. He thought maybe he could get through to the crew, now. The Venlil confirmed all of his claims about humanity, and it was obvious he loved the little guy...or at least didn’t want to eat him.

But the captain rushed to execute him, because he hated that someone listened to a predator. Of course, extorting every bit of suffering first, and making uncivilized threats. The human saw his life flash before his eyes; he felt afraid and alone. What was his crime but existing? Why was this happening to him?

“You did all of that, Sovlin. How could you?” I screamed. “Marcel was never noncompliant, or of a predatory disposition. He was just sickening to look at.”

The tears were flowing freely now. I couldn’t live with the knowledge that I inflicted such torment on a sentient creature, who came to my ship in peace. By extension, the ensuing war caused the Gojidi Union to lose our cradle to the Arxur. All I ever wanted was to save my people, and instead, my actions cost billions of lives.

I yanked my sidearm out of its holster, and shoved it into my mouth. Someone who had done what I had didn’t deserve to live. I felt like I was thinking clearer now than I ever had in my life. Just a few more seconds, knowing what a failure I was.

Five, four, three…

With a detached sigh, I tugged the gun out of my gullet. It would be wrong to leave a mess for my crew to clean up, and traumatize another person. Even if I hung myself, someone would stumble across my body. They would live with that image for the rest of their lives.

My stubby legs staggered out of the briefing room, and navigated to a maintenance airlock. The thought crossed my mind to write an apology as a suicide note, but that just didn’t cut it. Staring out at the stars, I knew that I could be free of this guilt. The only trace of this would be a data point on the logs; after my disappearance, someone could fill in the blanks with quiet conjecture.

“CAPTAIN! Please, don’t do it!” Doctor Zarn shouted from behind me, seeing my paw hover over the lever. “They can rebuild your homeworld. Ending your life is a permanent decision, and you will never contribute anything again. It will taint your legacy, and the Union will be weaker for your loss.”

“I don’t care about any of that! Why did you follow me?” I growled.

“Because there is still more to add to your story, sir.” The Takkan raised his paws in a pleading gesture, inching toward me. “Even if you don’t see it, each day is a gift. It’s a chance to do something for someone else.”

My eyes rolled back, as those last words sank in. The doctor didn’t realize why he was right, but he was. These final actions were selfish, the coward’s way out, because I was too afraid to turn myself over to the predators’ custody. What right did I have to deprive Marcel of his revenge?

Death was too kind for what I did. Suffering was what I deserved; none of the physical pain could be as awful as what I felt now. It was tough to breathe through the oppressive guilt, misery, and regret.

“I have to go,” I snapped.

The doctor stiffened. “Sir, you’re not in your right mind. We’re going to the medbay for observation…”

I shoved past Zarn, speed-walking back to the bridge. My gaze met Rumi’s, and I gave the comms technician a slight nod. The young Gojid looked floored to see his captain disheveled and sniffling. My paws moved him aside, and tapped the recording button on his console.

“This is Captain Sovlin speaking. I wish to state for the record that Officer Recel conducted himself in accordance with the highest Federation ethical standards.” My eyes swept across the chamber, studying my beloved crew for the last time. “It is my final wish that he succeeds me as captain of this vessel, and that any charges against him are cleared. I…I will be turning myself in for crimes against sentience. That is all.”

Astonished gasps echoed across the bridge. Zarn looked baffled which “crimes against sentience” I was referring to. It wasn’t my place to persuade him, or to fault him for feeding me slanted information. The responsibility for my decisions fell on my shoulders. I didn’t want the rest of my crew taken with me.

The only honorable thing to do was to turn myself over to the humans, and accept my nightmarish fate. I rushed through the corridors to the hangar bay, not wanting to give myself time to chicken out. Whatever the predators did to me was their prerogative, but my expectation was a slow and painful death.

It was quick work to board a shuttle, punching in the stellar coordinates for Earth. The predators’ breeding grounds, hadn’t I called it? A planet that filled my heart with hatred, that I longed to destroy with every fiber of my being.

Starlight twisted in the viewport, signifying that my final voyage was about to commence. This wasn’t the way I thought my military career would end. Very soon, I would know more about the humans than I ever wanted to.

My mind was adamant that such penance was merited.