Breakfast was a muted affair.
The Kincaids talked a little, but Annette was already hurrying to get to work, and Damian kept stealing glances at Natalie whenever he thought she wasn't looking. Mitch and Kelsey were arguing as usual, but there was an undercurrent of excitement in the air they couldn't suppress. Tyler was silent, but his eyes were bright and he smiled a lot at the sniping between the other two.
Quinn was silent too… but his was a lot more uncomfortable. He was staring at his cereal, only taking a bite every minute or so.
"Well, I'm off," said Annette finally. She kissed Damian on the check, and Quinn right after. Mitch looked about to make fun of him, but Kelsey kicked him under the table, and he fell silent. "I know none of you plan to attend school today, but I expect you to get your homework done anyway, for the sake of your parents."
"Have a good day, Annie," said Damian as she headed out. As soon as she was gone, he glanced at Natalie. "Got a minute, Natalie?"
She nodded. She always ate fast, so her bowl was practically empty. While everyone else finished their breakfast, the two of them walked down into Quinn's parents' room and shut the door.
"I noticed you hadn't sealed your door last night," said Damian quietly.
Natalie winced. She had sealed her door every night since she got there—at first because she was afraid of them, and then because she was worried they'd realize why she was doing it in the first place.
Damian shook his head. "You're not in trouble. I glanced in though, and I saw you two."
"I—"
"Natalie, am I wrong in thinking you can hear us from anywhere in the house?"
She hesitated, before giving a very small nod.
He sighed. "I'm sorry."
"It's okay," Natalie whispered.
"It's not. But—"
"I'm leaving today."
Damian stopped short. His mouth opened and closed a few times, and Natalie knew he'd been about to say something like "you don't have to" or "that's not what I was going to say"... but it was. She knew it was, he knew it was. He was about to tell her to leave, because the fear had won out.
Natalie was no longer welcome in their home.
"Have you told Quinn?" he finally asked.
Natalie nodded again. She didn't want to lie, but she knew he couldn't possibly handle knowing that his son was going with her, so she settled on the half-truth.
"...I'll be gone today," said Damian finally. "I have errands to run, and I'll stay out. You and your friends will have the place to yourself. Take as much time as you need, and text me when you've…" He looked like he might cry. Natalie wanted to cry too, but her tears didn't come. She didn't want him to see her cry. "I'm so sorry, Natalie."
I'm sorry too. I put you in danger. I'm still putting you in danger just by standing here. I'll stop that now.
It is his fault. They chose to reject you.
Natalie turned away and went back to her friends—to the one group of people she felt like she could trust in the whole world.
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True to his word, Damian left not long after. As soon as he was gone, they set to preparing. Natalie and Quinn gathered up his things, as much as he felt like he'd need. They'd included a bunch of camping supplies, but Natalie expected them to stay in the Greywood. She might not, but they probably wouldn't want to live in the forest. Kelsey might, but she couldn't imagine Tyler or Mitch lasting out there very long. She hoped Quinn would, but she wasn't going to fool herself into believing it yet.
Prepare for anything, and only rely on myself. Right?
Yes.
Natalie nodded to herself.
They left a note on the table, explaining to Quinn's parents. Natalie wrote it, seeing Quinn's continuing reluctance. She wrote how she'd keep them safe, how they were going out to find answers and hopefully find a safe place for her to live. Natalie was uncomfortably aware how much they'd object—she was taking their son toward the danger they'd asked her to avoid.
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The danger keeps coming back at me anyway. If I stay, it'll be worse, since I won't have any help here. Back home, I have Gwen, and Scrappy, and all the other awakened who stayed.
You do not need to justify yourself to me, Natalie.
It helps me think, okay?
Natalie led them down to the bus station. They boarded the first one heading toward Olympia, and settled into the back seats for the three-hour ride. Quinn and Natalie hugged the back corner, with Natalie's head resting comfortably on his shoulder. Kelsey, Mitch, and Tyler took over the seats across and in front. The bus was packed, but her friends had arranged for them to sit together without anyone else nearby.
They do it and I didn't even ask. You're right, they're really good companions. Am I doing the wrong thing letting them come along?
Everyone knows them at your school. They would have no peace there. With you, they will be safer.
Yeah… you're right.
Natalie kept asking it the same questions over and over, and the voice reassured her every time. She was just nervous. She was making the right choice. They'd be better off. They wanted to come. She hadn't asked, they chose. They were her friends, and she was finally moving again.
She was going home.
Natalie fell asleep again on Quinn's shoulder, and missed most of the ride. When her eyes fluttered open, Kelsey was beaming at her again. Quinn was looking out the window, but Kelsey just grinned and gave her a thumbs up. Natalie rolled her eyes, but didn't move an inch. On the other side of the aisle, Mitch and Tyler were playing a game on their phones. Natalie watched them for a while, able to make out everything even from so far away, but soon enough, they heard their stop announced over the tinny bus speakers.
"I can't," whispered Quinn.
Natalie's blood froze. Suddenly, the shoulder she still lay on was a block of ice. The warmth was all gone.
Mitch and Tyler were already halfway down the aisle, eager to start moving as the rest of the bus flooded out. They hadn't noticed a thing. Kelsey had just stood up, but stopped at Quinn's voice. "Huh?"
"I can't go with you," he said, even quieter than before.
"What?" asked Kelsey, her voice rising.
Natalie quickly shook her head.
She'd been fooling herself this whole time, but she knew it was coming. It hurt so much more than she'd expected—but she had expected it.
Quinn was too afraid, too reluctant. He'd never left Seattle. His parents were everything to him, and unlike the rest of Natalie's friends, they'd actually known this whole time. He knew exactly how they felt… and they weren't okay with her.
She leaned over and kissed him on the cheek. Quinn couldn't look at her. He stared out the window instead. Natalie got up and walked away, a dumbstruck Kelsey following her in a daze. Quinn stayed, in that seat all the way in the back of the bus, staring out the corner window. Natalie gave him one last look as she reached the front, and Quinn returned it.
He was crying.
"I'm sorry," he mouthed.
Natalie slowly nodded. She tried to smile, but her mouth just wouldn't quite make the shape. After a few awkward moments, she turned and got off the bus. The bus doors creaked closed. The engine spat and churned, drowning out the confused questions from Mitch and Tyler. Natalie ignored them, turning and setting off toward the forest ahead.
The bus had taken them close to the spot everyone wanted to go, but apparently all the drivers refused to go closer. The curves of the road, so familiar to Natalie from checking and re-checking maps for their trip, twisted and rolled up into the hills. Natalie would follow them all the way back to the town which lay at the end, another hour or two of walking.
She was almost home. The trees formed thick, dark shadows in every direction. Her friends shrunk away from them, scared, but Natalie eagerly pressed forward. This was her forest. She'd been here before, and not just on the last drive out. She knew exactly where she was, and not just thanks to the maps.
A car trundled by, packed with people who shot them concerned looks.
Natalie glanced back to her friends. "We should get off the street."
"You think?" asked Mitch, eyeing the thick woods with an uneasy grimace.
"Come on, don't be a wimp," said Kelsey—but she didn't look too pleased herself at the prospect.
Natalie was about to answer them, but something else had caught her attention. A tug, deep in her heart, stoking the fire. Something was coming.
Someone was coming.
Natalie hurried off the road, her panicked friends in pursuit. She ran forward. Her bag bounced merrily on her shoulder, and she practically danced over the tree roots and fallen branches that tried to bar her way. She could feel the rush of pounding feet in her mind, an emotion thrown across miles of forest.
A howl pierced the afternoon sky.
Natalie's heart soared.
With a quiet thud, huge feet landed into the small clearing in front of her. A flash of grey fur blurred her eyes, and Natalie realized she was crying again. Gwen sat in front of her, fierce yellow eyes studying her. She stayed very still, letting Gwen get used to the new Natalie. Gwen would need to understand what she had done before she accepted Natalie as a leader once again.
"Natal—" started Tyler, before Kelsey slapped a hand over his mouth. Gwen's eyes shot up toward them, but Natalie shook her head at Gwen.
Gwen's gaze shot back to Natalie, still studying, still waiting for Natalie to make the first move.
Natalie took one step forward.
That was all it took. Gwen bounded forward. Kelsey let out a brief cry of alarm, but Gwen had only buried Natalie in her own equivalent to a hug. Natalie burst into laughter as Gwen's warm, thick fur completely engulfed her. They rolled over on the ground. Gwen licked her face, and Natalie grinned.
Percy, who'd been following them the whole time, finally swooped down and landed on a nearby branch. He squawked indignantly, as if annoyed he hadn't been welcomed back too. Gwen glanced up at him with a dismissive air, and he squawked even louder.
Natalie only laughed.
"So… uhh…" started Kelsey. "Are we… okay?"
Natalie turned back to her friends as Gwen got back to her feet. The wolf issued a low, soft growl, distinctly welcoming and friendly—but of course, Natalie's friends couldn't know that. They all took an involuntary step back. Gwen looked up at Natalie.
She grinned. "Guys, this is Gwen. My best friend."