Odelle, at that point, knew nearly everything about him. They both understood, after all, that it was only a matter of time before they’d be working together as the queen and her advisor. But there was one thing that started the gap between what she knew of him and who he was: him joining the Ravens and, perhaps more importantly, his eventual meeting of Terika.
It was in her presence that he was willing to wonder if the gods truly did watch over even the most heretical of mortals; or, rather, that even the most heretical of mortals were still deserving of affection. She was a Raven like he was, recently asked to move to the base closest to Hyasari. At first he only interacted with her once or twice a week, whenever he might naturally come by. That changed so that, in a year, they would claim themselves married—though it was a quiet matter, kept from the church and anyone else who might question it. She was a proud heretic; the church chose to ignore people like her and, to preserve his status, he had to do the same when he was being watched.
They had a child, after a little while. Four years later would have been the first and only time Odelle—and anyone else outside of a few Ravens—could even have begun to wonder what was between them.
As per tradition, Kadol stood to the right of Odelle and Thero to the left; they were quickly approaching her twenty-fifth birthday and it wouldn’t be long after that that she’d replace her mother on the throne.
“Oh, Nigel’s here!” She smiled and waved to her boyfriend. He gave her a glance as well but otherwise did little else to acknowledge her. “But I guess everyone here are big names in the church, huh..?”
“Not everyone,” Kadol mused after he saw two familiar people.
She tried to follow his gaze but gave up to simply ask, “Who are you talking about?”
“The fair Terika Piper and her little Lillian.”
“Friends of yours?”
“I suppose you could call them that.”
She bounced to her feet. “Then let’s go say hi! I’m tired of sitting here anyway.”
Neither of them bothered to try to change her mind. Kyra was talking with some of the other bishops that showed up and probably wouldn’t mind if her daughter wasn’t where she should be. Soon all the greetings would be done and they’d all be walking around anyway. In that moment, he couldn’t see it hurting anyone; perhaps this was where he started his long list of regrets.
“Good evening!” Odelle said cheerily when they got there.
Lillian smiled and waved. “Hello!”
Odelle always had a soft spot for children. Had she been capable, she undoubtedly would’ve had children running all through the halls of the castle. So to be in Lillian’s presence alone was enough to make her forget all else and talk with her.
Kadol took the time to pull Terika aside. “I thought I said you shouldn’t come tonight,” he said as quietly as he could.
“Lillian wanted to see you work,” she replied simply with a smile. “You won’t have to worry. No one’s going to recognize me here.”
“That’s the part we should be most concerned about…”
…
There were times when hysteria arose in the people of Qizar over those who wished to point out the faults in their gods. These moments were often associated with Zofie’s reign, but it wasn’t the only time he saw it happen. When the panic started, the Ravens did what they could do to keep their valuable members well out of the public’s suspicion. If it seemed nothing could be done, they did whatever other discreet thing they could do to keep the Raven safe. One such occurrence several weeks after that ball led to Terika and Lillian needing to move away from Hyasari.
It wasn’t long after that the group they were with lost communication with the Ravens; no matter how experienced they were, they all knew there was little left to do but hope.
The most important part of being a Raven and not getting caught was not mourning for those with heretical beliefs, many of them they knew personally. Their grieving, if they dared to try, had to be done in secret. Perhaps that was why Kadol gained a liking to Allen… as the closest thing he could have to replacing what he lost.
If you stumble upon this narrative on Amazon, it's taken without the author's consent. Report it.
It was those emotions that led them into the conversation. “Are you trying to get yourself killed?”
“I don’t see how it’s any different than you’re doing,” Allen replied casually, “and as far as they’re aware I’m a well-respectable church-goer. I’m technically in charge of an entire region!”
“I’ve been around Zofie her entire life. I know you’re probably one of the best people for her, but—”
“You admitted that I’m not wrong. Look, Kadol, I know you’re worried, but nothing bad’s going to happen. Everyone will be happier—we might even get the queen on our side because of it.” He nudged Kadol. “Eh? Eh?”
Kadol shook his head and sighed. “Zofie isn’t going to budge—if it was possible, it would be done by now. She doesn’t see hardships; she sees opportunities to grow closer to Orestis. We were so close with Odelle and so far away with Zofie… it isn’t worth the risk to put yourself out in the open like this.”
“Then I don’t have to mention anything about the Ravens. I’ll pretend to listen in service. Above all else, I’ll give her the kind of love and support she needs. Can you really deny that?”
The next words were his next biggest regret, “Alright.”
…
It would’ve worked, if Allen wasn’t so headstrong and didn’t underestimate the extent of Zofie’s paranoia.
“A… Raven..?”
Kadol didn’t know what he hated more about the situation: the fact he was obligated as the queen’s advisor to reveal his own pupil or the queen’s look of pure confusion and betrayal. But he couldn’t show anything, lest he only contribute to the hysteria. “The White Ravens. From our sources, they appear to be a group hoping to overthrow the place of the gods… reveal their ‘false truth’ about the Commandments to the entire kingdom. Some seem to be rather benevolent and passive in their actions, though others are much more assertive.”
“How could we have been so blind? Are there more like him, holding high positions within the church? Are they even higher—”
“It’s alright, Nokae,” Thero interrupted, placing a reassuring hand on her shoulder. “We’ll figure this out.”
Zofie took a deep breath. “Orestis tells us that those who defy Him will be punished. Kadol, start a search for Allen and any of these other ‘Ravens.’ Perhaps there’s still enough faith left in them to be redeemed in flames…”
…
In the next year, all he could do was emotionlessly watch the executions of those under him; some he knew personally, some he might even consider friends, and others were those he didn’t care for. It proved to him that, if there truly was a fragment of doubt left of Zofie’s commitment, there was none now. Most happened around Hyasari. There was one, though, that happened outside—one that she instructed that he personally watch over.
Kadol assumed it was her way of trying to test his loyalty. If he proved to do this in a manner that respected the gods and her decision, then she’d be put at ease once more. Like any other time, he would do exactly what she expected of him without a moment of falter.
At least, that’s what he thought until he saw them.
He didn’t make the connection at first. Seeing ‘Lillian Audun’ didn’t faze him. Being near the small Tylane Coast town they were supposed to go to didn’t mean anything to him. Then he walked into the room the couple was being kept in until it came their time to be executed.
“It’s you,” he breathed. His semblance of impartiality was never so close to breaking.
Lillian smiled. “It’s nice to finally see you again, too, Papa.”
“How are you not dead?”
“We didn’t so much as lose touch with the Ravens as certain Ravens cut the ties on our end.”
“Terika—”
“Mama’s already met Vriuh. It was one of Queen Zofie’s first.”
“Now you…”
“It’s not as bad as it sounds, I promise! I’m actually really glad it was you that came. See, I have a son. They’re going to bring him to a church and let him be raised by the nuns there. I know you can’t really take him because that would be suspicious and you’ve got obligations to Queen Zofie, but if you could get another Raven to bring him back to Hyasari…”
“Of course. I’m sorry that I couldn’t get to you sooner, but I promise I’ll do what’s best for your son.”
…
“Jesper,” Kadol said gently, “you’ve got to listen very carefully. I’m going to trust you with this.”
Jesper looked and acted so much like his mother; it almost felt like, around him, it was as if Kadol never lost the experience of raising a child in the first place. There was a pain that came with it, but one that he could easily bear. Now it was time to let the boy experience the world on his own and hope that he didn’t follow everyone else.
“I’m going to allow you to leave the base. But remember everything I’ve told you—don’t mention the Ravens, don’t mention this place, and above all else, don’t mention or acknowledge that you know me. If anyone asks, you’re just in Hyasari to visit family; they shouldn’t need any more information than that, and if they do you can be honest and say you’re from the coast. Alright?”
Jesper knew how much expectation and faith was being put on him and he nodded solemnly. “Of course. I’ll do whatever I can!”
“Good. Now, to get into more detail about what you’re going to be doing…”