Jeffery exhaled as he leaned back in his seat, placing his mug of beer down on the table in front of himself, off to the side. Sitting across from him, on the other side of the playing mat, there was a man sporting a bitter expression. “You can’t be serious,” the man said, staring at a particular shiny card lying on the table amongst an assortment of other cards depicting the explorers within the tower. “This new Erde expansion pack is a crock of alligator manure.”

Jeffery shrugged, unable to find fault with the other gambler’s words. “It is what it is.”

The other gambler stared at the shiny card placed down on the table. It depicted a woman with black hair and purple eyes. She had a pair of horns on her head, and a staff in her hands. Underneath her feet, there was the depiction of a clock’s face. “These cards should be banned,” the gambler said, staring at golden text embossed on the card’s surface. “Take another turn after this one. Repeat thirty times? Are you serious?”

Jeffery shrugged. “Tafel’s a time mage capable of speeding people up and slowing them down via magic,” the retired guide said. “She can increase the speed of someone’s actions by up to thirty times. If you think it’s unfair in card form, you should see her take action in person.”

“What am I supposed to do?” the other gambler asked, dropping the cards in his hand onto the table. “Whoever plays Tafel’s haste card wins the game.”

“No,” Jeffery said, shaking his head. “You’re thinking of Tyrant of the Towers Vur; that’s what his card does.”

The other gambler fell silent. “How much does the Erde set cost?”

“About ten times the standard price,” Jeffery said, nodding his head. “You know how scalpers are.”

“Damn.” The other gambler threw a bag of geums on the table before sweeping up his set of cards. He glared at the card depicting the smiling demon before standing. “I’ll be back.”

“Good game,” Jeffery said, packing his cards up as well, placing them all into one neat deck. He shuffled it as he looked at the other patrons within the bar. Then, he put the deck away into a case before taking out another one with black patterns on the back of each card. “Who’s next? I still have the Corrupted One’s deck to try out.”

“This is boring.”

Jeffery turned his head to look at the bluish-green caterpillar positioned on his shoulder. “I told you exactly what I’d be doing,” the retired guide said. “If you have a problem with watching me play Geimeo cards, then you should’ve said something before we came here.”

If you discover this narrative on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen. Please report the violation.

“I didn’t think you’d find such a boring game so interesting,” Garlic said. “Rather than playing cards with explorers on them, why don’t we go find these explorers and have them perform tricks for us? We’ll learn so much.”

“Sure,” Jeffery said, nodding his head before reaching out to pick up his mug of beer. “Let me just whip out the authority granted to me as someone who’s never passed the second floor. I’ll make those explorers dance and sing for you any time.”

“It hasn’t been that long since I’ve hatched, but I know everything about sarcasm,” Garlic said, staring at Jeffery with his beady eyes.

The retired guide shrugged. “Use your inherited knowledge to amuse yourself then.”

“Are you going to sit here and play cards all day?” Garlic asked.

“Yes.” The old man sipped on his beer. “I’m retired, so I’m allowed to do whatever I want until I’m dead or out of money.”

“Where do you keep your money?” Garlic asked, crawling down the old man’s arm towards the root bracelet wrapped around his wrist. “Let me spend it for you.”

***

The Light Lord frowned as she stopped in front of a set of wooden double doors. Crunching, chewing, and swallowing sounds were coming from behind it as if a starved beast had been given a carcass to eat. Ashley pushed open the doors, and a strong, pungent smell assaulted her nostrils. A large white dog was sitting at the head of a table, holding a fork and knife in its front right and front left paws respectively. Broken red and orange shells with globs of glistening meat akin to lobster meat were displayed on the plates covering the table.

Sir Selddup swallowed the Oebu Sin flesh he was chewing before turning towards Ashley. The white dog licked its lips. “This isn’t Erde,” Sir Selddup said. “Are you lost?”

Ashley’s expression darkened. “How can I get lost with the root bracelet’s positional tracking?” she asked before shaking her head. “I want you to come to Erde with me.”

Sir Selddup blinked, his utensils clanging against the table as he lowered his front paws. “And why in the world would I do something like that with a bad owner?”

“Because I need you,” Ashley said, nodding her head. “You’ve seen Vur and Tafel; you know how strong they are. If I want to thrive on Erde, I need your help. We make a great team.”

“Your definition of team is making me act like a mount while you shoot your gun while sitting on my back,” Sir Selddup said. “Why can’t you act as the mount and carry me around while I launch spells at our enemies?”

“Because you’re the dog,” Ashley said. “The other way around doesn’t make sense.” She pursed her lips upon seeing Sir Selddup ignore her and reach for another cooked piece of bug. “You’re faster than me when it comes to running, so it only makes sense for you to be the mount.”

“I’m better at eating than you, so why did you eat steak and lobster while I ate dog food, huh?” Sir Selddup asked.

Ashley furrowed her brow. “Because … you’re a dog?” The Light Lord tilted her head. “Look, are you going to Erde with me willingly or not?”

“Bite me.”

The Light Lord shrugged as her root bracelet flashed, a rifle appearing in her hands. She grabbed the barrel and positioned the gun as if she were holding a two-handed mace. “Suit yourself,” Ashley said, raising her weapon over her head.

“Wait!” Sir Selddup shouted. “Crazy owner, stop!”