“Is this the place?” E squinted and pulled aside the curtain in his car. A beam of sunlight shone on his face, causing him to yelp and shield his eyes. “It’s too bright out. Can’t you dim the sun?”

“I can do no such thing, Your Gloriousness,” Zappy said with a sigh as he hopped off the carriage and opened the door for the dwarf king. “And yes, we’ve arrived at the Gemstone Merchants’ headquarters.”

E grunted as he slid out of his seat and landed on the ground. He frowned at a marker on the ground that had the words ‘Ten Meters’ engraved on it. “What’s this?” he asked, nudging it with his foot. “We passed by a few of these on the way, haven’t we?”

Weren’t you asleep? Zappy frowned at E. “The earth elementals started a game called … dwarf punting.” He walked over to the marker and smudged out the words with his foot. “The scouts weren’t too happy about reporting that.”

“Dwarf punting, I see,” E said and furrowed his brow. “I wonder how they determine the winner. Is it based on distance alone, or do the expressions of the flying dwarves play a part?”

“You’re wondering about the wrong things, Your Gloriousness.”

“Am I?” E asked. “Who’s the king here? You or me?”

“You can’t just use the fact that you’re king to win every argument against me, Your Gloriousness,” Zappy said and sighed as the duo approached the base of the mountain. “Yes, you’re the king, but that doesn’t mean you can never be wrong. If you were always right, you wouldn’t need advisors.”

“The only reason I have advisors is to delegate the work to them instead,” E said with a snort. “Otherwise, I’d make a perfect king.”

“More dwarves?” a voice asked. E and Zappy frowned as a group of boulders with gemstones for eyes rolled outside of the cave in the mountain. One of the boulders turned around and asked, “Whose turn is it?”

“My turn! It’s my turn!” a boulder with green eyes said. “I bet fifty pebbles that I can beat your record.”

Zappy cleared his throat. “Excuse me, you’re addressing the king of the dwarves, His Gloriousness E.”

The boulders fell silent before exchanging glances with one another. “You’re the dwarf king?” the green-eyed boulder asked Zappy.

“No,” Zappy said and sighed. “He is.”

This story has been stolen from Royal Road. If you read it on Amazon, please report it

The boulders’ gazes shifted from the well-dressed dwarf to the one that was wearing pajamas and looked like he had just rolled out of bed. Then they shifted back to Zappy. “Well, I guess we can start the game,” the green-eyed boulder said. “Fifty meters and a terrified face, right? I can beat that.”

“I knew expressions had a role in the scoring system,” E said with a grin. He poked Zappy. “I told you so.”

“Your Gloriousness, please. They’re about to attack us,” Zappy said. “Can you save your childish antics for later?”

“As king, I declare all my antics to be non-childish,” E said with a snort. He clapped his hands together. A dozen sets of metal armor materialized in the air behind his back. “Seize them.” The armors swooped down and grabbed the boulders, preventing them from moving. The boulders cried out and let out vibrations, but they couldn’t do anything but leave their bodies and reenter the earth.

“You’re a bully! We’re telling the clan master!”

E watched with a blank expression as the gemstones on the boulders faded away. The sets of armor dropped the uninhabited boulders and retreated behind E’s back once more.

“Your Gloriousness’ golemancy is inspiring to see as always. I remember when people used to make fun of you for abandoning the traditional path of a warrior,” Zappy said as he stared at the shining sets of armor.

“Becoming a warrior is too much work compared to being a golemancer. Why do anything when I can have my golems do it for me?” E asked and walked down the passage.

Zappy muttered, “All the wrong reasons,” as he followed after his king. Despite being inside of a mountain, the region was lit up as if it were outside. Shining gemstones on the ceiling and walls illuminated the twisting paths. E walked forward with confidence, not hesitating at any fork in the road.

Zappy asked, “Have you been here before, Your Gloriousness?”

“Never,” E said.

“I wasn’t aware golemancers had a spell to unravel a maze.”

E nodded. “They don’t.”

“Then … you do know the path, right?”

“Nope.”

“E…”

“Hmm?”

“Are we lost?”

E puffed his chest out. “A king is never lost for his kingdom follows him wherever he goes.”

“Oh, I didn’t know that. So this place is Konigreich the Second too? I can tell that to Tafel next time, right?” a voice asked from behind them.

A higher pitched voice answered with a giggle. “Right.”

E and Zappy whirled around. “Who are you!?” Zappy asked the half-naked man with a fairy sitting on his head.

Vur narrowed his eyes. “Were you the ones bullying my subjects?” A few brown spots of light were floating beside Vur’s body, chattering away.

“It was him!”

“And those armor sets.”

“The one in the suit is rude.”

“You’re the newest clan master?” E asked, raising an eyebrow. “And it wasn’t me who was bullying your subjects”—he pointed at Zappy—“it was him. You can have him if that’ll make you feel better.”

Vur nodded. “Then I’ll take him.”

“Y-Your Gloriousness!?” Zappy asked as earthen hands sprung out of the ground and seized the dwarf by the ankles. The ground beneath him split, and he was dragged down into the gaping fissure. A second later, the earth closed up again.

E grinned once Zappy disappeared. “So, isn’t it about time you answer my question? Are you the newest clan master of the Gemstone Merchants? What’s your name?”

“Yeah, I’m the new master,” Vur said with a nod. “I’m Vur.”

E’s grin broadened. “I like you a lot already. Let’s be friends.”