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Third Time's The Charm 1

Third Time's The Charm 1

“Are you sure about this?” asked Jess in a concerned manner.

“…”

However, the sentient mithril golem sitting opposite her did not respond, but instead kept staring out of the stagecoach window. The vehicle had already passed through the Ishigar Republic’s eastern border, which was kind of impressive considering it had been only four hours since it departed from the literal and figurative heart of that elven nation - the capital city of Azurvale. However, one didn’t really need to go through a checkpoint to realize they had crossed over into the Horkensaft Kingdom’s territory, as the scenery around the vehicle was rapidly becoming quite different. The endless fields of green - be they trees, grass or shrubs - had already been replaced by a considerably more rocky environment. That wasn’t to say that there was no plant life to be seen, but the Kingdom’s predominantly hilly and mountainous terrain did not leave a lot of room for vegetation to flourish. This meant that the only things that could be seen from inside the vehicle were grassy hills with patches of bare dirt or gravel, the occasional large boulder sticking out of the ground, and the snow-covered peaks in the far distance.

“Yo, Fizzy!” yelled Plus. “The girl just asked you a question!”

The golem slowly tore her gaze away from the window and looked towards her traveling companion. Jessiwick Wobblebang, or Jess for short, was a blonde-haired blue-eyed female gnome who was still very much in her prime. She had a face that bordered more on cute than beautiful, which was a bit at odds with her laborer-like attire. The gray wool shirt, baggy burlap trousers and heavy boots were so entirely common that people on the street would pass her without a second thought if it wasn’t for that face of hers.

A face that was currently looking back at Fizzy with a genuinely worried expression.

“… Hmm? Sorry, what were you saying?” she finally responded.

The voice that came out of her throat sounded like someone was speaking through a metal pipe, mostly because that was exactly what was going on. As for the owner of said voice, her appearance could easily be said to be the opposite of Jessiwick’s. As a golem, every last part of Fizzy’s body was comprised of mithril. This radiant precious metal, also known as white gold, sparkled and glowed with a truly captivating luster, making her stand out like a shiny sore thumb if there was even the slightest bit of light around.

It wasn’t just her ‘skin’ though, as Fizzy’s clothes emphasized and accentuated her body’s feminine curves while still keeping her halfway decent. Of particular note were the belts wrapped around her torso, more specifically immediately above and below her modest bust. They pressed the fabric of her short sleeved shirt against her permanently perky pontoons, making them appear larger than they actually were. The constantly disheveled overalls covering her legs left her hips and the sides of her thighs exposed, while also subtly announcing to the world that she didn’t wear underwear.

Indeed, as a golem, she didn’t really have to wear anything. It was actually within her nature to show off her body to others so that they might admire it and shower her with praise. A less flattering way to put it would be to say that she was an exhibitionist with heavy narcissistic tendencies, and she loved every second of it. However, one had to wear clothes in order to appear respectable in civilized society, and as such her current risque attire was something of a compromise between the need to blend in with others and her innate instincts as a walking work of art.

That wasn’t to say that Fizzy was always like this, of course. As a matter of fact, her current shiny self was a relatively recent development. Although she was once a simple gnome who only wanted to hone her Artificer Job in relative peace, certain box-shaped circumstances had caused Fizzy’s life to veer wildly off course. A fateful meeting, a wrongful imprisonment, a divine rendezvous, a cursed gauntlet and several months of violence and mayhem had seen to it that the naive girl named Cornie Fizzlesprocket was, for all intents and purposes, dead. Neither her pathetic flesh nor her bothersome naive personality remained anywhere on this world. She had willingly and eagerly cast both of them aside to become the glorious mithril golem that was currently hitching a ride with Jess.

Well, technically Fizzy still retained the same face, name and memories from her time as a useless meatbag, but those remnants were, respectively, not necessarily a bad thing, still had some use, and couldn’t be helped.

“I asked if you’re really fine with just up and leaving like we did,” reiterated Jess. “It’s not too late to turn back if you’re having second thoughts, you know.”

“No. It’s okay. I can’t stay in that place anymore,” responded Fizzy while leaning back in her seat, causing the cushion to creak ominously under her tremendous weight.

“Surely you can work things out with Keira if you just gave it a bit of time, right?” offered the gnome.

“I’m afraid it’s not that simple,” stated the golem. “I know I said we had a ‘falling out,’ but truth be told, its a good deal more complicated than that. ”

“And you’re sure there’s no way you can make up and be friends again?”

“Yes,” replied the pint-sized Paladin while once again looking out of the window. “Quite sure.”

“Heh. Yeah, that’s certainly one way of putting it,” commented Plus in a jovial manner.

What do you want me to say then, huh?! shouted Fizzy internally. Oh hey, so my God’s chosen Hero died yesterday. Also by the way that Hero was actually a treacherous monster and I not only knew that, but willingly committed atrocities in its name. Whoops, my bad!

“Easy there, boss. I never said it was a bad excuse. I’m just saying I hope it doesn’t come back to bite us in the ass.”

What, the authorities? Those guys are a joke. I’m more concerned that whatever ended Boxxy might come after us, too.

A case of content theft: this narrative is not rightfully on Amazon; if you spot it, report the violation.

“Right, that’s a good point, actually. I hadn’t thought of that.”

That just shows you got a lot to learn, rookie.

“I guess.”

After that brief exchange, the golem’s head went as dead silent as the cabin had become, disturbed only by the gentle rattle and shaking of the stagecoach as it traveled along the stone road. However, rather than awkward, the silence felt succinctly more solemn, though that could probably be attributed to Fizzy’s divine presence. As a Paladin and Champion to the God of Chaos, it was only natural that she would exude a subtle divine aura that promised to safeguard the faithful against harm. It was a Job she was personally given by the Goddess of Gambling herself to support the unstable deity’s chosen Hero, and Fizzy took that task of hers very seriously.

And all her effort and hard work were proven to have been for naught, as blasted Mimic had gone off on its own and gotten itself killed anyway.

*SLAM*

“Waaaah! What was that for?!” squeaked Jess in a loud voice.

Fizzy had struck the side of the cabin with her fist in a fit of futile anger, producing a much louder noise than she was intending.

“Are you alright in there?!” came a male voice from somewhere behind the golem’s head.

“We’re fine!” she shouted back. “Sorry about the racket!”

“Yeah, whatever,” replied the coach driver. “Just don’t break my ride, alright?”

“I won’t! Sorry again!”

The man let out a few more dissatisfied murmurs, though the wooden paneling between him and his passengers made it impossible to pick up on what he was saying.

“Seriously, what’s going on with you?” asked Jess. “I know we haven’t known each other for long, but you’re acting way too weird!”

“Yeah, well, you’d behave strangely too if you suddenly lost something precious to you.”

“O- Oh…”

… Crap, did I just spill the beans?

“I think you might have, yeah.”

“Did it… hurt?” asked Jess hesitantly. “Your arm, I mean.”

“Oh! Looks like she misunderstood!”

Yeah… I guess I’ll just roll with it.

“Golems don’t feel pain, you know. Not physically, anyway,” explained Fizzy while caressing her shoulder stump with her right arm. “But emotionally? It’s been hard. Harder than I thought it might be. I just can’t settle down ever since I lost it. I mean, I thought I could put it past me without too much difficulty, but now I’m having second thoughts. Knowing that a part of me is missing and I can never get it back is depressing, to say the least. Sure, I can maybe find a replacement, but something tells me that nothing will ever fill the void it left behind, and that this sense of loss will haunt me for the rest of my days.”

“Wow…” replied the flabbergasted Jesse. “I never knew it meant so much to you.”

“Well, it did. More than you could ever know. It’s just a shame I didn’t realize how precious it was until it was already gone.”

“… Are you sure you’re still talking about the arm?” asked Plus in a slightly accusatory tone.

Who knows? replied the golem internally.

“I guess I may not be able to relate, but I think I get it,” continued Jess. “I’d probably feel like my life was over, too, if I lost an arm. An artisan’s hands are their greatest asset, after all!”

“Nope. Sorry to break it to you, but if you think that, then you are wrong.”

“I am?”

“While hands and opposable thumbs are definitely important, all they ultimately amount to are extremely convenient tools. An Artificer’s main weapon is, and always has been their mind.”

“It… It is?”

“Of course it is, you moron! You don’t keep blueprints and schematics in under your fingernails, do you?! It’s not your pinky that tells you how much Firedust is too much Firedust, and it’s not your knuckles that determine how much strain a cog can take before it breaks!”

“Hmmm… I guess I’ve never thought of it that way. I’ve always been a more ‘hands on’ person, you know?”

“Well, you better grow out of it, and soon,” warned Fizzy. “You won’t make it as an Artificer unless you learn to work smarter, not harder.”

“Just can’t help but act the Mentor, can you?” said Plus in a bemused tone.

Yeah, well, teaching has always been one of my strong points.

In fact, that gift of hers was part of the reason why Fizzy was aiming for the Royal Institute of Technology. Although it carried out a lot of research, it was an academic institution first and foremost. She always enjoyed teaching others, so being able to turn it into a profession while furthering her Artificer Job was hardly a bad idea. Truthfully speaking though, she wasn’t really looking forward to dealing with idiots who didn’t know a lug nut from a flange, but rather the opportunity to show off exactly how brilliant she was. After all, anyone could plainly see that her glorious frame was worthy of worship, but it would be even better if they recognized her superior intellect as well.

“I see! So that’s how it was!” exclaimed Jess. “You say some really nice things! As expected of a Fizzlesprocket!”

Jess’s excited smile rapidly diminished into a panicked frown as she realized she just uttered the F-word.

“I’m sorry!” she apologized immediately. “I didn’t mean to-!”

“Calm down, Jess. It’s alright,” said Fizzy in a surprisingly calm voice. “I’ll be hearing that a lot once we get back to Gun Tarum, so I might as well get used to it. At least until I get it changed.”

“Oh, right.”

There was a brief moment of silence as Jess worked up the nerve to speak her mind.

“Can I ask you something personal, Fizzy?”

“I guess.”

“Why do you want to distance yourself from your clan so much? I mean, I’m sure they’ll welcome you back with open arms if you just gave them a chance. You can easily get into the Ritz if you had their help.”

“… Maybe, but that would defeat the purpose of the exercise.”

“Huh?”

“It’s like… How can I possibly hope to achieve true greatness if I’m constantly relying on someone else’s hand?” she explained. “Would a soldier who readily accepts a medal he didn’t earn still have the right to call himself a soldier? Would the people who climb mountains feel like they’ve accomplished something if someone else just flew them up to the peak?”

“Uhm… No?”

“That’s right - they wouldn’t! Glory has to be earned, and I want to be someone who’s capable of seizing it by myself. I’m going to climb that mountain under my own power, and even if I don’t reach the peak, I want to still be able to stake my claim on it and proudly declare ‘This is mine!’ while standing on my own two feet! I want to be the hero of my own story, not cower under someone else’s shadow!”

There was another moment of silence while Jess waited to confirm that Fizzy was well and truly done with her tirade.

“You, uh, are we still talking about the Fizzlesprockets?”

The golem turned away from the gnome and rested her shiny face against the glass window.

“Who knows?”

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