As she was escorted around the so-called ‘Heart of Light,’ Fizzy’s vantage point atop Orrin’s shoulder allowed her to spot something clearly out of place. It was a circular stone platform dangerously close to the base of the massive crystal. There were several reasons this place struck her as odd. Firstly, it was the only structure that was even remotely near the Heart, likely due to the sporadic jolts that leapt out of it. Secondly, it was round. That cornerless shape was completely at odds with every other display of gnomish architecture within sight. Even the other platform that Krum was headed to was a rectangle carved from the cavern’s slightly sloped floor. Then there was the giant-sized metal cage situated in the middle of that suspicious circle. It seemed as though the array of lightning rods peppered throughout the cavern were there solely to divert the Heart’s random arcs away from it.
It wasn’t until one such jolt that briefly illuminated the large enclosure and the object within that Fizzy finally understood what was going on.
“Orrin?”
“Hm?”
The Priest turned to look at the golem on his shoulder and saw her pointing at the questionable structure.
“Is, that-”
“Another Astral Nail, yes.”
“Of, course, it, is.”
The construct was clearly annoyed by this development. She’d never even heard of these things until this whole mess started, and now it seemed everyone and their mother had one. Admittedly it wasn’t as if she knew any other ways to travel to and from Tascuna, but still, this seemed more than a little… convenient. It then dawned on her that her ride might know something to explain this tomfoolery.
“You, knew?”
“Of course. It’s my first time seeing it, but our new friends were quick to inform me of it when we met face to face.”
“How, did, it, get, here?”
“I believe I can answer that.”
The Priest nearly tripped over his own feet when Tizoc’s voice came from his other shoulder, where the self-proclaimed prophet had suddenly appeared.
“It is a story from long before my time. Your people,” he nodded at the Priest, “used their light magic to peer into the great void with ever-growing clarity. They spotted our clan and contacted the Skyseer before me, my father, using that same magic.”
“You speak of Lightbinders?” Orrin asked, clearly intrigued.
“Yes. It is the same magic that we Skyseers have used to read the stars and tell the future. This projection is also one of its uses.”
The baby-faced elder flicked his nose with his finger, causing his head to momentarily shimmer and glow. It was his way of demonstrating that the thing upon the giant’s shoulder was a magical construct of some sort, with light as its primary element. In other words, a solid illusion. Orrin was shocked to learn that his ancestors’ lost art was so close at hand. He wanted desperately for Tizoc to pass the Lightbinder Job onto him so he could bring it home to what was left of his people, but now wasn’t the time to be asking for such favors. He reigned in his enthusiasm and allowed the welch to continue his story.
“From them, we learned much of the world below - Terrania, in your tongue. They shared their magic, language, and most important, history. Before then, we believed the world below was lost to the old machines. Many of the other clans still do, and the Nemesis is doing little to change their minds.”
“Hold, up,” Fizzy interrupted. “What, old, machines?”
“A different, much older story,” Tizoc smiled coldly. “For now, know that it is they that forced us to seek refuge here, on this moon.”
The golem was momentarily stunned. She assumed prophecies was as far-fetched as this guy’s beliefs went, but it would appear she had underestimated him.
“… If, you, say, so.”
As doubtful as she was, however, Fizzy decided that was a rabbit hole she’d rather not get involved with right now.
“So, then, my people shared the secrets of the Astral Nail with yours?”
Orrin agreed and tried to get back to the current topic of his ancestors’ involvement in this whole debacle.
“Yes,” Tizoc nodded. “It took many decades, but we were successful in bridging the gap between our worlds. The next months and years saw many of your explorers and scholars visit us, to learn and share knowledge.”
“Hold on. If that truly happened, then why is this the first I’m hearing of this? An achievement this monumental would be celebrated the world over!”
“I can’t say. Maybe the tragedy that struck our new friends is to blame.”
The Priest’s expression darkened. He had a feeling he knew the answer to his next question, and as much as he dreaded it, he had to ask.
“What tragedy?”
“Their home fell to the walking dead, eradicating all life.”
It was that after all. To learn that the Boneshaper’s merciless conquest had buried this historic achievement into obscurity only added to the tragedy that was the fall of Percepeia.
“We offered refuge to what few asked for it,” their host continued. “We worked with them to find a way to counter this… sickness of death. Our combined knowledge succeeded, but it was too late. Their home was already beyond salvation.”
Orrin’s eyes then grew wide with something approaching hope.
“Wait… you found a way to fight the Blight?!”
“Ah! Blight! That is the word. And yes, we invented a ward. A totem.”
“Do you still know how to make this totem?!”
“Of course. We have used it many times to clean up the ghost poison that the Nemesis forced upon my people many times. Most recently, when our new friend was spreading it. I hope that was ignorance.”
He glared at Fizzy for a moment, but she just shrugged stiffly.
“I just, thought, it, repelled, bugs.”
“That it does. The hive knows this ghost poison. We all do. That is why Krum and Krak attacked you. They assumed you were an agent of the Nemesis.”
The male twin scoffed and grunted, but said nothing as he continued to guide the guests along the cavernous path.
“I, never, was. All, I, wanted, was, a way, home. But, now, it’s, personal.”
“You seek vengeance for your wounds?”
“Damn, right.”
“Good. This is a wish I understand and trust. Many of us share it.”
“Uh, huh. So, about, this, prophecy. Which, hole, did, you, pull, it, from?”
“Hole? I do not understand, but it was written in the stars. Our clan has always looked to them for wisdom, but the secrets of the giants allowed us to read them with great clarity.”
“Stars. Right. Because, distant, lights, know, about, the, future.”
“It is not the sky that tells us what will happen. It is how we interpret what we see in it.”
“Ah. So, no, different, from, pure, fabrication.”
While Fizzy was gearing up for another argument, Orrin’s head was swimming with new possibilities surrounding this totem thing. Katya herself had admitted that the locals had a way of negating her attempts at weaponizing her toxic waste. Though he didn’t think of it much at the time, the gnomes’ totem could prove to be the key to retaking his people’s homeland. If it was strong enough to nullify the invisible killer called radiation, then it seemed very likely it was indeed capable of purging Percepeia of the Blight. True, Priests and Paladins could do so as well, but there was a lot of ground to cleanse, and clergy couldn’t be mass-produced. This totem likely could, and Orrin had an idea about who could help him do it. There was, after all, a little corner of the Empire that could use some industrial-strength detoxification. This was all conjecture, but based on what Orrin had heard of the Calamity of Monotal, the lethal miasma left in its wake wasn’t too dissimilar from radiation. The humans would surely not hesitate to pump out thousands of these totems to clean up that ongoing supernatural disaster, and afterwards the items could be made to fulfill their original purpose.
In short, bringing the moon gnomes’ discovery back home would prove instrumental in rectifying not one, but two large-scale tragedies. Perhaps it might also solve their current automaton problem, if the stars aligned.
“Hold that thought, Fizzy,” he interrupted. “Tizoc, do you know how to operate the Astral Nail?”
“Yes,” he nodded. “The knowledge has been recorded and preserved, but I must warn you. We have sent brave explorers through the portal. Their sacrifice taught us the other side is heavy with Blight. A machine like Fizzy will not suffer the disease, but you will die walking.”
“That… is… extremely unfortunate.”
This was frustrating news indeed, as it all but confirmed that the Astral Nail led to the Blighted Lands. Even with the plague-cleansing totem, there were still countless undead and a few hundred kilometers of treacherous ocean separating the cursed continent from the landmass of Atica. It hopefully wasn’t impossible to make it back to civilization, but it would take far too much time and effort for Orrin’s idea to work. He imagined that the Kingdom’s military might want to get involved in this lunar conflict once they found out the Original Artificer was waging war on a forgotten tribe of gnomes. Perhaps even the Empire could get involved, enticed by the potential of this Calamity-cleansing totem. Either nation’s armed forces would surely prove capable of defeating Katya, and both of them combined could crush her industrial empire in a matter of days. Even if neither government wanted to get involved, there would surely be plenty of adventurers that would leap at the chance to visit the actual fucking moon.
However, none of that was going to happen if the only way to and from Tascuna was through the bloody Blighted Lands. This might have been for the best. Judging from what Tizoc said about the other clans, having a bunch of heavily armed ‘aliens’ pop in might cause more problems than it solved. Apparently, Politics was an inescapable part of civilization even here. In any event, with the Priest falling silent and Tizoc not wishing to engage in the confrontational construct’s criticisms, the solid illusion dissipated into a spray of colorful sparks. This left Fizzy and Orrin alone as they followed Krum. They were almost at their destination, but the golem decided to try and probe the hunter for some more information.
“Hey. Krum.”
“… What?” he replied without turning around.
“Can, you, understand, me?”
“Little. Language, uh… hard for me.”
“Never, mind, then.”
“Hmpf.”
The group formally arrived at their destination shortly afterwards. Once they were there, they realized this square platform carved out of the rocky floor was intended as an observation deck. Or a ‘good place for looking,’ as the hunter described it. It was indeed an excellent vantage point from which the Heart of Light could be seen in its entirety. Furthermore, visibility was excellent due to the copious amounts of sunlight flooding in from the hollow mountain’s opening far overhead. This new perspective gave Fizzy a better idea of the power stone’s overall shape, which was close to the stereotypical zig-zaggy line that lightning bolts were often depicted by. Of course, it wasn’t this kind of ‘observation’ that she was planning to do. Her intentions were far more scientific in nature, so as nice as the view was, it was ultimately useless. Still, this platform would prove sufficient for a staging area while she studied the crystal and its enchanted emissions.
A disjointed, awkward conversation with Krum revealed it would be some time before the gnomes could provide the materials they promised the golem. Apparently they’d only give her whatever spare parts and salvage they didn’t need for their war effort and kludged weapons. It was better than nothing, but not by much. Fizzy wasn’t expecting to find anything in those leftovers that would allow her to build the sort of complicated machine necessary to measure the crystal’s emissions. She might’ve been a genius, but there was a limit to what she could build in a cave with a box of scraps. If she hoped to replicate the field that stabilized her mental faculties, she’d have to make use of a questionable technique that was officially known within the Artificer community as ‘eyeballing it.’ Not literally, of course. Electromagnetic waves weren’t visible. However, the magical construct could feel them in her core, and she had an idea as to how she might boost the accuracy of her perceptions.
Fizzy got off Orrin’s shoulder and awkwardly made her way to one of the four lightning rods situated in the corners of the square platform. These towering poles of steel have clearly been here for a long time, during which they must have been struck by hundreds of jolts each. With her innate ability to ‘talk’ to metal, the golem hoped they might provide some insight as to the magnitude and severity of these arcs. And if not, well, then she’d have to figure out something else. Perhaps probe the locals’ knowledge on the matter. Actually, that seemed like a good idea in general. They were gnomes, after all. Someone among them must have given into their innate curiosity and studied this Heart of Light in greater detail, perhaps even recorded some data she could use. But before she turned to the meatbags, she would first see what this pole would have to tell her.
However, Fizzy had made a slight miscalculation as to the nature of those lightning rods. Yes, they were designed to attract and redirect the electric surges into the ground, but energy wasn’t dissipated into the rock and soil. It was captured and redirected to used power crystals that the gnomes had buried under the poles as a means of recharging their spent magic. In other words, what the golem was reaching out for was effectively a primitive and poorly insulated battery charging device. Krum realized her intent as she was reaching out for it. He shouted a warning for her not to touch it, but in his haste he failed to use words that the outsiders could understand. As such, the construct ignored him despite the harsh and urgent tone, and placed her left hand upon the still-charged rod.
Fizzy’s world went completely white as several weeks’ worth of random electrical discharges coursed through her frame, right through her damaged core. Her ears were flooded with thunder for just a split second, followed by a deafening silence. Her mind froze, the sudden development rendering it completely blank and devoid of thought for the first time in a long, long while. Several seconds later neither the whiteness nor the silence had abated, and the thought that she had gone deaf and blind snapped her out of her shocked stupor. She frantically looked around and realized that her sight and hearing were actually fine, and that her surroundings were simply an infinite expanse of nothingness. Well, except for the bucket full of green pudding that was floating upside-down just a few steps behind her.
“… Randy?” she chanced a guess.
“In the metaphysical flesh!” Juliano merrily replied. “Long time no see. How are you holding up?”
“Uhm… not great, to be honest. Memory troubles, and all that. Plus and Minus would know better. Actually, I don’t think you guys have… met?”
It was at that point she realized her head was awfully silent.
“Hello? You guys in there?”
She knocked on the side of her mithril skull, but there was no response.
“Oh! Right, those guys!” Irving remembered. “I almost forgot about them!”
The Goddess of Chaos snapped some unseen extremity twice, and two more mithril golems appeared on either side of Fizzy. They were almost identical to her aside from their faces and attitude. The one on her left stood upright and with dignity, her eyes rounder and cheeks softer than Fizzy’s. The other construct had a narrow gaze bordering on slanted, a distinctly pointy and prominent chin, and her posture was hunched over with arms dangling limply from her dropped shoulders. Of note was the fact that their plating was completely intact and clean, showing no signs of the damage Fizzy sustained after she blew up that underground hive. At second glance, the original personality’s body was just as unblemished. She didn’t get her hopes up though. She knew these forms were just mental projections that didn’t necessarily reflect reality, so her battered frame was no doubt waiting for her back on Tascuna.
“Sorry about that you two,” Jerome waved at them with his bucket handle. “Didn’t mean to leave you out like that.”
“Oh! Mister Goddess of Instability, sir! It’s so nice to finally meet you!”
“… ‘Nice’ isn’t the word I’d use.”
Plus was ecstatic while Minus groaned in typical fashion. It was only after this exchange that Fizzy’s clones realized each other’s presence. Their gazes drifted between the deity, themselves, each other, and the original as they processed what was going on. It was actually a bit creepy how perfectly in sync their heads and eyes moved.
“Okay, this is officially trippy,” mumbled the positive one.
“I’ll say,” agreed her counterpart. “So what’s the deal, big guy? We dead or something?”
“You’re perfectly fine.”
“You sure? ‘Cus we just got hit by the mother of all lightning strikes.”
“So what? We’re made of metal. A few sparks won’t bother us.”
“That wasn’t a few sparks,” the original argued. “That was a huge jolt of magically charged lightning that probably passed right through our core. Which, I will remind you has a fucking hole in it.”
“Oh. Crap.”
“I knew it! We are so dead!” complained the youngest. “I told you that was a bad idea to touch that stupid thing!”
“Yes, but, you say that about everything.”
This tale has been unlawfully lifted without the author's consent. Report any appearances on Amazon.
“Because all you two ever come up with are bad ideas!”
“Girls, please,” Robert intervened. “I assure you, you’ll all be fine. Otherwise I’d let Mortimer handle your shiny butts instead of arranging this little meeting.”
The three golems offered a mix of nods and shrugs as they conceded the point.
“Have you all calmed down? Good. Now, I need to have a word with Fizzy here. It’s serious god-to-servant talk, so could you two go play over there for a while? No offense, but you’d just get in the way.”
“Well, I guess we might as well enjoy this break while we can. C’mon, sis! Let’s see if these babies move as well as the real thing!”
“… Yeah, okay. I guess this beats being backseat drivers all the time.”
The two Parallel entities continued chatting and bickering as they dashed off into the infinite white void. Fizzy saw them off with a small wave of her hand before turning her attention back to her self-appointed patron deity with genuine concern on her face.
“Are those two going to be fine?”
“Why wouldn’t they be? They’re handling this remarkably well.”
“In the future, I mean. Plus is mostly cool with her situation, but Minus seems a lot more restless.”
“Ah, I see. You’re worried whether internal conflict might literally tear you apart.”
“Something like that, yeah.”
“Normally that’s something to look out for with Parallel Plot, but I have a feeling you’ll find a way to handle it. Who knows? Something good might happen if you got yourself an Ultimate Skill or if you stick around my Hero long enough.”
“Is that you giving me advice or are you just doing the whole ‘non-zero chance’ thing?”
“You say that as if they’re different things,” Lydia answered with a wink. Well, as much of a wink as a container full of confectionery could produce.
“Uh-huh. You know, I more or less expected to run into you with all the crazy stuff that’s happened to me lately. Just not quite so… in person.”
“You did, did you? Heh. Must be losing my touch.”
“Not really. It’s just that all the weird coincidences and bizarre goings on are the sort of stuff that’s right up your alley. Also, Tony keeps saying you’re elbow deep in this entire situation.”
“Yeah, that guy. He was getting a bit too savvy to be any fun, so I had to fire him. He’s only partially right, though. My involvement with the moon gnomes is actually quite miniscule in the grand scheme of things.”
“Sure it is. Also fish fly backwards and oxen handle the wolves’ accounting. I’m not that naive little meatbag you bamboozled before.”
“Oh, ye of little faith… Or is that too much faith? Hm.”
“Look, don’t get me wrong. I appreciate all you have done for me and continue to do, whatever that is, but don’t piss in my ear and tell me it’s raining. Just tell me what your endgame is and how I’m supposed to make it happen, and I’ll do it. So long as I get to punch Katya’s face off in the process.”
“Sure, just, kill all the fun. It’s not like I have to find ways to entertain myself before this job inevitably drives me insane and I start crashing moons into oceans for shits and giggles.”
The bucket full of dessert leaned closer to Fizzy, then spoke with a serious tone.
“But, you have made your point. I’ll stop jerking you around - at least for a bit - but you need to do me a favor in return.”
“What favor is that?” the golem warily asked.
“Blink.”
“… Huh?”
“I need you to blink. Like, right now.”
“Why?”
It was a pathetically simple thing to do, but that was also why Fizzy was wary of doing it.
“Because until you do, I’m stuck as a bucket of weirdly colored gravity-defying pudding, and that’s a very difficult shape to be dramatic in.”
“Oh. Uh, sure. There, that better?”
“I don’t know, purple really isn’t my color.”
“How about now?”
“I like the blue fish legs, but the windows are a bit much.”
“And now?”
“Eh, this’ll do,” said the oak tree made of sand. “I gotta say, though, that unceasing glare of yours is a bit freaky.”
“Yeah, well, I broke the habit of blinking all the time ever since I realized I don’t need to bother with it anymore. I just do it every now and then when I feel it’s appropriate.”
“Great, now you have me blinking manually. Thanks for that.”
“Sorry. Anyway, about Tascuna, what is it you’re trying to accomplish?”
“That I can’t tell you. But, I can confirm that I arranged for both the gnomes and Katya to end up there to make it happen. Unfortunately, things went a little bit awry along the way. That century-long stalemate? Not part of the plan. And without any of my followers involved, my ability to influence events is… practically none.”
“So, making me a Paladin, turning me into a golem - was it all to bring me here to fix your mistakes?”
It wasn’t that much of a leap of logic. If Renaldo hadn’t forced the Job on Fizzy, then she never would have survived long enough to get the cursed gauntlet from that dungeon. Nor would she be in the ‘right’ mindset to accept that curse with her whole being. But all of that did happen, and as a result she became uniquely qualified to open the Vault Beneath the mountain, which she already knew about and had a vested interest in. In short, Randy’s interference set her on a path that would inevitably lead her to Tascuna, with or without Boxxy.
“You’re giving me too much credit,” Michelle rebuked her. “I pave roads, but I don’t force anyone to walk them. Also, if you’d let me peel back the curtain a bit, you weren’t my only plan to get eyes on Tascuna. If I decide to interfere with something, I launch multiple schemes in parallel to maximize my chances of success. You just happened to be the one possibility that worked out.”
“I… suppose. You still haven’t told me what it is I’m supposed to do.”
“Right. Well, as you already sort of guessed, that part’s simple. Katya needs to be removed. Punch her, zap her, dismantle her - doesn’t matter. You have my unconditional support, on the condition that you put a stop to her, uh, machinations? Yeah, machinations.”
“Good. Great. Excellent,” Fizzy’s voice rapidly turned to sarcasm. “And how do you propose I do that? Shall I fall apart at her and hope she chokes a piece of me while you cheer on me from another dimension?”
“Now, now. I never said my support was limited to the moral variety.”
“… So, what are you saying?”
“Actually, it’s not just me that’s taken an interest in the goings on up there. As I’m sure you’ve realized, Solus has thrown his hat in as well, what with making Orrin his new Hero.”
“Woah, hold up. Since when is Orrin a Hero?”
“Oh… Right, you might not remember that part… Well, point stands. I showed Mr. Sunshine what Katya’s been up to and he agreed that she needs to be stopped. But wait, there’s more! As you might guess, Zephyra hated her guts back when she was still human, and she still does. So, I reached out to her too and got her on board. Then there’s Goroth. The blockhead sees all gnomes as his people and the Original Artificer as his responsibility, so I guilt-tripped him into throwing his considerable weight in as well.”
Fizzy’s eyes grew wide. That was four deities that supported the downfall of that mechanical tyrant. It was extremely rare for so many of them to agree that a certain someone or something deserved to be expunged from the world, and whenever that happened, it caused a certain movement that would carry out their divine will.
“Ah, I see you’re already piecing it together,” the granular vegetation smirked. “But I’m not done just yet, for there is one more who takes serious issue with Katya’s conduct. Care to guess who it is?”
“Uh, Axel?”
It was an obvious choice. His Taboo was basically ‘no war crimes,’ and the Original Artificer’s stance towards Tascuna’s natives could be summed up as ‘all the war crimes.’ Her never taking prisoners was an obvious one.
“Ding, ding, ding, ding! Right on the money!” Joshua triumphantly declared. “And with that, Katya has found herself on the shit-list of over half the pantheon, which allows me to hereby officially declare a crusade on her plastic ass. And you, my tiny yet shiny Champion, have been chosen to lead it as High Templar, provided you agree to it.”
“Holy shit! Of course, I’ll do it!”
Granted, Fizzy didn’t know exactly what that title entailed, but she imagined it was an honor on equal footing if not greater than being chosen as a Hero. These were multiple deities that trusted her to see this task fulfilled. Not even her mountainous ego could make her think she was deserving of such a responsibility. Or capable. She was still mentally and physically crippled, and she didn’t have an army at her beck and call. Unless she could somehow rally the gnomes, who no doubt viewed her as ‘the enemy of my enemy but still an enemy,’ it was just her, Tony, and probably Orrin against Katya’s horde of killer machines. After thinking things through for a second, she realized there was no way they’d win this war with just them.
“Actually… Maybe not.”
“Hm? What’s the matter?”
“It’s just… I’m flattered that all of you think me so capable, especially you. It’s just that I’m going to need something more substantial than an official sanction.”
“Really? Seem to be handling things pretty well so far.”
“I’ve literally just been winging it for, like, a month? Maybe more? I don’t have a plan, or, or, or resources, or anything! I barely even know what the fuck’s going on with this stupid moon, and you want me to liberate it?! There’s just no way I can bullshit my way through this! Why not just, I don’t know, smite her with the fury of a thousand suns?!”
“Because our reach does not extend that far,” Salvador said with a heavy tone. “Our influence does not extend where there are no faithful, and with just you and Orrin up there we’re practically powerless to interfere. Why else do you think it took me so long to contact you? I still wouldn’t be able to if you didn’t just take that huge jolt of magical energy for me to tap into. Like it or not, it’s only through you that any of us will have an impact on events on Tascuna.”
“I… I see…”
“But, that’s not why I’m doing all this. Even if every one of my 857 followers were up there, I’d still entrust this duty to you and only you. You’re exceptional, Cornie. An outlier. A cut above. I didn’t pick you to be my Paladin just to serve some convoluted plot or two. I chose you then, and I would gladly do so again, because you are genuinely clever, intelligent, and quit-witted well beyond any other individual I’ve ever had the pleasure of personally working with.”
That speech hit Fizzy hard. She had no idea Norman had this much faith in her as an individual. To say she was flattered was like implying Boxxy might have a slightly elevated appetite. Though, the golem quickly reminded herself she shouldn’t take everything he said at face value. Sure, Alice sounded sincere, but she had a habit of saying things that, while not entirely wrong, were also not completely correct. That last bit, for instance.
“… That’s not a very high bar, is it?”
Being called the smartest when compared to monuments of ignorance like Tony and Boxxy wasn’t much of a compliment.
“Not especially, no,” he admitted. “Still, what I’m saying is that if anyone can bullshit a win out of this mess, it’s you. So, chin up and hop to it, yes?”
“Okay. I’ll try, but… you are going to actually help me, right?”
“Of course! Wouldn’t be much of an officially sanctioned crusade if we didn’t flex our holy muscles at least a little.”
“What sort of flexing are we talking about, exactly?”
“Remember the lump of energy I mentioned?”
“You mean the one that should, by all accounts, kill me?”
“Yes, that. While we’ve been chatting, my fellow deities and I have been molding it into a spicy cocktail of divine magic that’ll make the bot-bashing part of your job a lot easier. Not quite Hero levels of shenanigans, but pretty close.”
“Alright! Good,” she breathed a sigh of relief. “What about my, uh, brain damage? And my frame. There’s a lot of bits of me missing.”
“I keep telling you not to worry about it. That whole thing will sort itself out, you’ll see.”
“Hrm. It better. Or else.”
“Oh-hoh! Alright, I’ll bite,” he sounded bemused. “Or else, what?”
“Uh, I’m going to… tell everyone your feet smell! Or, something.”
“Oh, no. The horror. How will I ever recover?”
His deadpan tone made it clear he wasn’t taking the threat seriously, but Fizzy suspected he’d hate this petty slander more than he let on. Nigel absolutely abhorred blasphemy, judging from what Boxxy had told her. Speaking of whom-
“By the way, how is that bastard of a box doing without me?”
“Pretty good, I’d say. Fantastic if you consider it’s subscription to life was momentarily suspended.”
“Hold on, Ambrosia was right? It actually died?”
“Oh, yeah. It actually bit the big one. Even tried to bribe Mortimer into letting it return to life. That bag-o-bones was having none of it, but Boxxy still managed to slip out of his grasp.”
“Heh. Hehehahaha!” cackled Fizzy. “That certainly seems like something Boxxy would do! Ahhh-hahahahaha! Oh, wow! Phew! Okay! Guess it’s a good thing Tascuna already upped the scale on my What-The-Fuck-O-Meter, huh?”
“That’s one way to look at it, I guess,” Timothy smiled as best he could. “However, I do believe I should be sending you back soon. You have a crusade to organize, after all. Just, whatever you do, try and keep that big zappy crystal thing intact. It’s important.”
The golem’s good mood rapidly plummeted when she heard that. It brought to mind an incident that she had no recollection of, but Plus and Minus insisted she was its chief perpetrator.
“How important are we talking?” she cautiously asked.
“Very.”
“Why?”
“Don’t have time to go into details, but those giant crystals help keep Tascuna’s elements in balance. Kind of like Terrania’s ley lines, just more solid and on a smaller scale.”
“I see… And what would happen if I, uh, broke one? Like, by accident?”
“That shouldn’t happen. They’re pretty solid. You’d have to really try to crack them open. Unless it’s the fire one. That one’s quite unstable, if memory serves.”
“Ah.”
“… What did you do, Fizzy?”
“Nothing.”
Brigette had been too busy arranging the crusade to keep an eye on the golem, but that much-too-quick response told her everything she needed to know.
“You destroyed the fire mother-crystal, didn’t you?”
“… Yes.”
“Uuuugh,” Wallace groaned. “You know, of all the things you could’ve learned from Boxxy, blowing up super-dense lumps of magic was the least useful one.”
“How badly did I screw things up?” she cringed.
“Well… The good news is I now know the cause of that bright red dot that hundreds of stargazers saw on Tascuna’s surface last night. Bad news is the moon’s probably going to have another ice age.”
“Sorry.”
“It’s fine, it’ll sort itself out in a decade or so. Anyway! Our time really is up, so I’ll be sending all of you back now. Best of luck convincing the gnomes to help you out.”
“I’ll need it. And, uh, thanks for having my back, Killinger.”
“Eeeey, don’t mention it. Knock ‘em dead out there, champ!”
“Aye, sir!”
*Snap*
Darrell snapped his grainy leaves, sending Fizzy back into the mortal realm. As before, she was overcome by an extreme falling sensation as all three parts of her soul were sent to its beaten and battered container. Indeed, much as she feared, her frame hadn’t taken the power surge well. It also hadn’t let go of it, either.
In the moments following that sudden discharge, the mithril golem had started spasming violently. The unconscious construct bounced all over the stone platform as the overwhelming charge of magical lightning bounced around inside her frame, playing havoc with both her core and her mechanical muscles. Seeing this, Orrin did his best to help out the malfunctioning golem. He invoked his recently acquired divine boon, once more taking on the form of a Celestial Avatar. He had some time to practice with it ever since his tussle with the mind-controlled Fizzy, and has learned its strengths and weaknesses. The largest drawback was that this Skill required direct sunlight, so it was quite fortunate this observation deck was bathed in it at the moment.
Thanks to that, Orrin was able to contain the golem’s erratic movements by wrapping her in a golden globe of solid light. It took a fair bit of concentration for him to maintain it since she continued to bounce around inside it, but it wouldn’t break unless she made a focused effort to do so. It had been a few minutes since, during which time a number of gnomes had shown up to investigate the disturbance. Tizoc was among them, of course. In the flesh, this time. Krum had brought him up to speed, and was on standby along with Krak and a number of other soldiers who were ready to put the erratic golem down should she harm anyone or anything.
“I cannot keep this up much longer!” the giant shouted.
“You must contain it!” the Skyseer demanded. “We cannot risk damage to the Heart of Light!”
“I get that, but the Skill’s about to run out! So unless you can conjure a barrier capable of holding her, you best be ready for things to get ugly!”
The baby-faced elder cursed sharply in his native tongue, said a few words to his troops, then turned back to the giant.
“I cannot. A Lightbinder can shield and protect, but not contain.”
“Well… I have one more thing to try. Brace for it!”
Orrin released his grip. The magic holding the bouncing golem dissipated with the worst possible timing, as it sent her flying straight up. The massive lump of frozen lightning crackled in the background, and a bolt unlike any other arced and struck the construct in midair. She fell to the ground moments later, cracking the rectangular platform as she suffered yet another in a recent series of long falls. At least she’d stopped spasming even though jolts of electricity continued to leap out of her, though that was little solace considering she wasn’t moving at all.
“Oh, no! Please, no!”
Orrin ran up, throwing caution to the wind as he approached the immobile construct. He started casting his most powerful healing Spell, knowing full well that it should not work. But it had to. It had to, damnit. He was a Hero of Solus. His was the power to safeguard life, and Fizzy could mend her metal body, then so could he. All he needed was to have faith, and at this moment, the giant was positively bursting with it.
“Greater Heal!”
A pillar of light erupted from the ground and enveloped Fizzy’s body, the last trickles of divine solar energy empowering the magic beyond any logical limits. Once the dazzling display dissipated, the mithril construct did indeed start moving. It wasn’t more random flailing, nor was she standing up. The only part of her in motion was her mangled, dented, and scorched plating, which was rapidly folding and rearranging itself like a sentient puzzle. Her frame also steadily stretched outward in every direction as more and more mithril emerged from the depths of her body with no plausible explanation. Her overall shape remained humanoid, but was rapidly losing its anatomical accuracy. Her face was the only part of her that retained any semblance to the gnome she used to be while everything else was restructured with such speed that it ripped apart what scraps of clothing were left clinging to her frame.
“What do we do, Skyseer?!” Krum asked urgently in his native tongue. “I do not know what it is doing, but it gives me a bad feeling.”
“Just… wait,” Tizoc told him. “Let’s give it a chance.”
“If that is your will, Skyseer.”
“It is.”
Fizzy’s legs grew thick and heavy, her feet replaced by bulky boots that looked ready to make their own road wherever they tread. The knees were especially pronounced, like miniature battering rams. Her hips widened and thighs spread apart, ensuring her gait was wide and balanced. Her torso maintained a vaguely feminine shape, though any semblance of genitals or breasts were hidden underneath a second layer of overlapping and interlocking armor plates. Her forearms became cylindrical and comically thick while the upper portions remained quite slim and flexible, as if she were wearing oversized gauntlets meant to punch the life out of everything in sight. The Artifact that had been a part of her for so long fused with her body for good and began warping as well. It adopted a curved diamond-like shape that was overall wider and taller than its original incarnation. It reached up to her left shoulder, which had become taller and thicker than its right counterpart. Last but not least, the head. The imitation hair the golem had been stuck with for so long melted into a solid helmet. Her pigtails similarly transformed into perfect spheres that connected to the sides of her new cranium with short and thick shafts, resembling the ball-shaped tips of the very lightning rod that set these events into motion.
This marked the end of the large-scale transformations and the beginning of the finer, more delicate changes. Each flawless head-orb split apart into four equal plates like a lazily sliced fruit, revealing a whirring mass of machinery just underneath. Thick metal cables sprouted from under Fizzy’s chestplate, snaking their way between the inner and outer layer of mithril plating. They connected to her extra-bulky feet and hands, disappearing under the armor. The middle of her new shield opened up to reveal a large blue gem was now embedded in it. Several similar stones, albeit much rounder and smaller, appeared at key points along her new outer frame. After that, the construct’s body didn’t move or change much aside from minor, barely perceptible adjustments here and there as the self-assembled puzzle finely tuned itself so that its countless parts fit together perfectly.
The gnomes and Orrin watched this unfold with bated breath even as the activity rapidly winded down. Tony initially had the same reaction as he secretly hoped the golem wouldn’t wake up and he’d be freed of his forced serfdom for good. But, he quickly figured out that wasn’t going to happen and has since sat on the ground cross-legged, quietly grumbling, and rustling his hair. Then, to everyone else’s surprise, parts of the golem started to glow. More specifically, it was the cables woven inbetween her layered plating and the gem-like crystals that now adorned her frame. They let out a bright blue light that rapidly escalated in intensity and was eerily close in hue to that final bolt of mega-lightning she took. The similarity quickly proved everything but coincidental when the orbs atop the reforged construct’s head started crackling with tiny arcs of electricity, accompanied by a dull buzzing noise.
And then, Fizzy opened her now-shimmering eyes and sprang to her feet, her step somehow lighter despite all the extra weight. A large, manic smile spread on her radiant lips as power unlike any before welled up within her evolved core. She had regained consciousness halfway through the transformation, and though she couldn’t move a finger while it was ongoing, was very much aware of what had happened to her. Mainly because of the flood of messages in her mind.
[Rank up complete.]
[Congratulations! Your species has become Dynamo Golem (Mithril).]
[Level up!]
[Level up!]
[Level up!]
…
[Level up!]
[Level up!]
[Congratulations, you are now a Level 11 War Golem! STR +44. END +44. FTH +22.]
[The War Golem Job is now your Main Job.]
[Proficiency level increased. Static Field is now Level 1. INT +4. WIS +2.]
[Proficiency level increased. Lightning Affinity is now Level 1. AGI +3. INT +3.]
[You are no longer crippled.]
[Maximum HP has returned to normal.]
[The effectiveness of the INT and WIS Attributes has returned to normal.]
[Automatic HP and MP recovery have returned to normal.]
There was a lot to unpack there, but that was only the part that concerned her advancement to an even deadlier, hitherto unknown type of construct. There was also the matter of her new divine title and all the perks that came with it.
[You have been promoted to High Templar of the First Lunar Crusade.]
[Feat of strength performed! You have unlocked a new Perk: Instrument of the Gods. FTH +55.]
[You have learned a new Spell: God of Earth’s Divine Protection.]
[You have learned a new Spell: War’s Righteous Might.]
[You have learned a new Spell: Boundless Reserves.]
[You have learned a new Spell: Lifebinder’s Seal.]
[You have learned a new Spell: Physics Be Damned.]
“You meatbags best have good helmets!”
The dynamo golem raised her right hand towards where her mechanized wrench had fallen to the ground and Magnetized it straight into her charged grip. She raised it high, lightning crackling all around and the crystal thundering at her back.
“‘Cuz the sky’s about to come crashing down!”