“Hold it right there, plebeians!”
A somewhat shrill voice, magnified as it was, washed over the momentary standoff. Golem, giant, and dwarf alike were so focused on the Vault - and rightly so - that they completely failed to notice they had a visitor. Quite a few of them, in fact. A small procession of about ten people had entered the mountainside crevice. All except one seemed to belong to a troop of elite Spell-slingers, judging by their uniforms, attire, and obviously high-grade equipment. The odd one out was piloting an enormous suit of mechanized armor that both Fizzy and Tony immediately identified.
“I, Maximilian Fizzlesprocket, am here to take charge of this mess!”
Of all the people to show up, it just had to be the guy that the golem ‘pranked’ a while ago. This couldn’t have been a coincidence, and so Fizzy’s hand naturally went for her weapon.
“I wouldn’t get any ideas if I were you, you rusty bitch! As for the rest of you lousy grunts, you are hereby ordered to apprehend that heinous criminal at once!”
Maxie’s words prompted all the gnomes backing him up to draw their wands and staves, ready to unleash elemental devastation should anyone step out of line. They could very well wipe out the entire dwarven unit given the somewhat narrow confines they found themselves in. The unspoken threat of force was quite intimidating, not to mention the influential name backing it up. In any other scenario, the dwarves might have bent the knee and went along with it. Unfortunately for Maxie, these dwarves numbered among the rowdiest and wildest of the Kingdom’s soldiers, and their commanding officer was no exception.
“Who the hell died and put ye in charge?!” Highstone shouted back.
“I- My father is-!”
“I don’t care who yer pappy is! Ye’re a civilian. Ye got no authority here, boy.”
The grunts grasped their Lieutenant’s intent and, as per usual, completely agreed with it. Sure, they’d heard of the Fizzlesprockets. It was impossible not to, given their outpost’s proximity to Dragunov. However, they had no respect for blowhard Artificers. Especially this guy, thinking he could just march in here and boss them around like he’s somehow better than them. None of these men would roll over for this snot-in-a-can even if their officer told them to. So, naturally, they drew their weapons and formed a shield line. Björn wasn’t sure what was going on, but he backed up his tiny comrades nonetheless and stood in front while Orrin moved to the back of the formation. This put him right next to Fizzy and Tony, both of whom looked ready to murder everyone in the cave if need be. On the other side, the gnomish spellslingers looked rather shaken. It was clear they weren’t expecting resistance, least of all the armed kind.
Maxie, meanwhile, was positively fuming. It was bad enough that this golem humiliated him in Steelhead. It was even worse when she did so again in Gun Tarum. Yes, there was no hard evidence to suggest she was the one that tampered with his suit and made it overload and explode, but the gnome insisted. He just knew she was responsible. It couldn’t have been a coincidence that his machine went haywire after being transported on the same cargo car as that damnable construct. Fizzy had made herself the worst kind of enemy that day - a spoiled, impetuous, and petty one. Being who he was, Maximilian immediately put out a hit on the golem. If he couldn’t have her intact, he’d have her pieces. Of course, assassinating her was no simple task. Unlike most people, Fizzy was always armored and never slept, ate, or used the bathroom. Without those basic weaknesses to exploit, her would-be killer had to get creative. That was why he spent a solid amount of time gathering information on her, right up until a certain bloodthirsty hobgoblin scalped his skull clean.
Indeed, the shifty gnome following Fizzy around Gun Tarum was on Maximilian’s payroll. That wagon of caustic acid was similarly financed by him. Yet after all that money he threw at it, this golem just wouldn’t die. So, when he caught wind she’d left for Dragunov, he decided to just go for the direct approach and roped a bunch of Wizards and Cryomancers in the Fizzlesprockets’ employ into taking her down. Those would be the twitchy twinkle-fingers standing by him at this very moment. The fact that they had stumbled upon the notorious Vault standing wide open was little more than a happy coincidence. At least, that was how it seemed before this uppity dwarf started talking back.
“Don’t call me boy!” Maxie shouted. “Do what I say, or else!”
“Or else what?”
“You- I’ll have your job! Yeah! All of you! And your families! Your entire bloodlines will be exiled! Forced to live in squalor and- and- and misery!”
Highstone considered this obvious and outrageous threat and decided to respond with his usual sense of tact and decorum.
“Oh! Well why didn’t ye say so, yer majesty! Would ye like me to wipe yer bum while I’m at it?! Ye certainly don’t sound capable of doing that yerself!”
Which was to say with all the sarcasm and derision he could muster.
“What did you just- I’ve never-! Just stand aside, will you?!”
It was having the desired effect. Maxie was somewhat infamous for the way he carried on, as was his fragile ego. Whether pushing his buttons was a good idea or not was another story, but Highstone liked to believe that he wasn’t stupid.
“Here’s a better idea. Ye turn around and fuck off before I haul yer arse in fer treason.”
No amount of political clout would bail his ass out if he dared to actually attack the King’s army. Both of them knew that full well, so neither was expecting things to escalate beyond this. Their underlings, however, were not as clued in and looked ready to throw down at the drop of a pin.
“Vnimaniye! Vnimaniye!”
And it was at this exact moment that the Vault’s automated announcer decided to remind everyone of its existence. Startled by the loud, garbled, and foreign words, one of Maxie’s mooks let loose with a Spell he’d been subtly preparing for the past while.
“Whiteout!”
A howling blizzard enveloped the cave and everyone in it, blocking out Orrin’s floating light and plunging the area into freezing darkness. The soldiers started yelling and throwing themselves at the gnomes, who blindly shot off Spells in their direction. A stray lance of ice slammed into the Vault’s wall, prompting its security system to kick in. Alarms blared and twenty crab-like automatons appeared seemingly out of thin air, auto-cannons firing into the crowds at random. The chaos did nothing to muffle the deafening groan of the Vault door closing. Being an advantageous position to do so, a select few individuals decided to slip inside before the entrance was sealed. When that enormous metal slab finished sliding back into place, it completely silenced any sounds coming in and out. The ones that managed to make it inside were also treated to a quick and potentially concerning mental notification.
You have entered Lednik Dva.
“Ah?! What dis Lead-nick Diva stuff about?” Tony questioned.
“Huh. Seems the Vault was actually a dungeon, and we just walked into it,” Fizzy answered.
“Oh, my. That’s not good,” Orrin chimed in.
“So yeah, about that,” the golem turned to the giant. “Care to explain why, exactly, you followed us in?”
She jumped in because she didn’t want to get iced by that loud-mouthed bastard’s goons, and Tony didn’t have much choice. The Priest shouldn’t have had any reason to tag along, and yet there he was in his entire enormity.
“I was worried about you, white one.”
“Me? Really?” she crossed her arms. “I’d argue those meatbags outside are in greater need of your magic.”
“Oh, they will be fine. I’ve known those men for several years now, and I can guarantee they will emerge from this incident largely unscathed even without my aid. You, on the other hand, have thrown yourself into grave peril by entering this frozen… tomb.”
Indeed, those two words seemed adequate to describe their surroundings. They were in a long hallway that was just barely tall enough for Orrin to stand. Every surface was made up of enormous metal plates that were bolted in place by fist-sized rivets. The air was freezing cold judging by the giant’s white breath, yet also so dry that there was not a single speck of frost to be seen. Speaking of which, there were no issues with visibility. The ceiling was dotted with long and narrow lamps that bathed everything in a sterile white light while also giving off a barely perceptible buzz. Looking down the length of the hallway, it seemed to go on for about fifteen to twenty paces before ending in a T-shaped junction with passages going to the left and right. The wall where the paths diverged also bore a painting of a five-pointed white star with a few strange letters. A house crest, perhaps?
“Also did that hobgoblin just speak?” Orrin realized.
“Yeah? You got a problem with dat?”
“Not at all. If anything, I am quite impressed. It must not have been easy learning a foreign tongue all by yourself!”
“… Whatever.”
Tony low-key wanted to pick a fight, but this guy’s positive attitude took the wind right out of his sails. He knew he wouldn’t like giants.
“Anyway,” Fizzy got their attention, “I still have a dungeon-slash-vault to explore. Are you meatbags coming or what?”
“Are you sure that’s wise? Should we not stand by the entrance and wait for our allies to rescue us?”
On the surface, Orrin’s was a sound suggestion. This hallway seemed harmless enough except for the freezing temperatures. Though there was no obvious way to open the door from this side, the key was still in its lock. It was surely safer to stay here until the chaos outside settled down and the Vault was reopened. However, there was one itty bitty little detail that the Priest clearly hadn’t noticed yet, so Fizzy walked over, picked it up from the ground, and raised it up for the giant to see.
“… Is that part of the key?” Orrin warily asked.
“Yup,” the golem flatly confirmed.
“… Will the rest of it work without this bit?”
“Nope.”
“… Balls.”
“So are you coming or what?”
“I suppose we have little choice now, do we? In which case, allow me to make some preparations.”
Orrin collected himself and gripped his golden staff with both hands. He held it out in front of him, touched its tip to his forehead, and closed his eyes.
“Grip of Goroth. Zeal of Zephyra. Shroud of Solus. Lucidity of Lunar. Greater Blessing of Fortitude. Greater Blessing of Resilience. Lesser Blessing of Meditation.”
A myriad of lights swirled around the group as the giant bestowed boon after boon upon all of them. The cocktail of bolstering magics worked to amplify all of their physical and mental abilities on top of shielding them from the frigid air. This was a practical demonstration that the Priest Job was the king when it came to support Spells. Sure, a Shaman like Tony and Paladins like Fizzy had access to such incantations, but theirs were far fewer and nowhere near as long-lasting. The golem didn’t mind being outstaged in this manner, as the impromptu light show also had the side effect of making her even more flamboyant than before, at least for a few moments. That and she could practically feel her core glow with energy. She could get used to this.
“Nice. Good to go, then?”
“Aye,” Orrin nodded.
“Excellent. Tony?”
“Hm?”
“You stand between me and Orrin and shield him from any attacks that slip by me.”
The hob raised an eyebrow, looked up at the towering man, then back towards the small construct. How was either of them supposed to cover a target that big?
“What?” Fizzy questioned his confusion.
“Never mind. Can we go find somethin’ to murder now?”
“Indeed, let’s.”
The three of them thus set out to explore the Vault, opting to go left at the T-shaped junction up ahead. The hallway almost immediately opened up into an enormous chamber large enough to fit several houses. It was filled with massive shelves that reached all the way up to the dizzying ceiling, its height comparable to that of the dwarven wall outside. A number of fittingly gigantic mechanical arms dangled from the walls and support pillars, all of them mounted on rails that would allow them to carry resources to and from their designated plots. Indeed, this entire room was naught but a storage depot of immense proportions. Its varied contents included jars of powders, crates of ingots, boxes of parts, gas canisters, and tubs of liquid. A number of vents, conveyor belts, and pipes were scattered around at regular intervals to facilitate ferrying all these materials elsewhere.
All of that aside, however, there was not a single trace of life or movement to be found - just a whole bunch of stuff on ice, so to speak. The completely arid atmosphere meant the materials were incredibly well preserved, likely by design. A certain shiny-obsessed shapeshifter would not have hesitated to loot the place, and Fizzy had that thought as well. Unfortunately she lacked the convenience of an extra-dimensional storage space, so she decided to leave the items be and explore the other main passage. That side of the Vault proved to be far more interesting. Though it had a similarly enormous chamber, this one was an open space that was a combination workshop, factory, and laboratory. It was difficult to say which part was used for what specifically due to how messy the place was. A bevy of strange tools, semi-assembled devices, and mangled materials lay scattered about at random, in stark contrast to the meticulous organization of the storage depot.
Among the abandoned projects there were two that stood out the most. The first was an enormous humanoid automaton that was easily twice Orrin’s height. Its sleek, slender, and angular frame had a strange, alien beauty to it despite the fact that it was still unpainted and was missing an arm and a head. Well, ‘missing’ probably wasn’t the right word. They were present, just dangling from some cables and cranes waiting to be attached. Fizzy and Tony went over to check it out while Orrin focused his attention on the second outstanding find. Elevated atop a circular metal platform in the middle of the chamber was a pillar of bone and wood almost as tall as the Priest. It stood out as the only object carved primarily from organic materials, though not entirely. It was set with a number of gemstones and the Original Artificer had attached a few doohickeys and antennas to it, though the detail that drew Orrin’s attention the most was the column of seven runes carved along its height.
“Wait… is that… No… it couldn’t be…”
The Priest mumbled to himself as he approached the arcane object, having momentarily forgotten about his monstrous companions. With every step he took, he grew more certain of what he was looking at. By the time he was close enough to touch it, there was no more room for doubt. Against all odds, in direct defiance to any sense of logic, and for seemingly no reason at all, he was looking at a relic from his doomed homeland. As someone who had taken it upon himself to preserve his people’s culture, customs, and history, Orrin could easily identify the craftsmanship and iconography as being Percepeian in origin. The symbols in particular had-
*KER-CLUNK*
A loud crashing noise startled the Priest something fierce, prompting him to spin around on his heels and raise his golden staff in case he had to smack something with it. He was instantly relieved and a little annoyed that the disturbance wasn’t caused by an enemy, but by Fizzy and Tony. While he was ogling the relic, they had gotten busy looting the place and the hobgoblin had accidentally knocked over a push-cart and spilled the countless screws, nuts, and nails it was carrying. The perpetrator didn’t care about the disturbance and kept rummaging through a tall cupboard’s shelves while the golem was digging through a pile of scrap.
Did you know this text is from a different site? Read the official version to support the creator.
“Must you two be so brazen? Surely there are more important things afoot than hunting for… trinkets.”
The monstrous duo paused and looked at the giant as if he was spewing pure madness.
“It’s a dungeon,” the golem stated. “You’re supposed to loot dungeons.”
“So de boss says,” the Shaman shrugged, “and I never been one to pass on a bit of lootin’. Is good fun.”
“Also, I’m hoping we find a key, or switch, or something that’ll open the front door. I’ll also settle for a secret exit or something.”
“Ah. Yes, I suppose we’ll need that,” the Priest agreed. “I’ll leave that to you nimble-fingered ones.”
And so the golem and the greenskin got back to sifting through the mess while Orrin just surveyed his surroundings for a bit.
“That said,” he realized something, “this is a very strange dungeon.”
“What do you mean?” Fizzy asked over her shoulder.
“There’s no monsters or traps. Barely any magic in the air, either. It’s cold, but other than that, it’s nothing like the one at the top of the mountain.”
“It’s simple. The Original Artificer must’ve gotten her hands on a dungeon core and set this place up using its magic.”
“That’s… remarkable, if it were true.”
“It’s not that big a deal,” the golem insisted.
“No, it actually is. Dungeons are supposed to be divine property, under the gods’ direct supervision. They have the power to create life from nothing, and such a thing was never meant to be in mortal hands.”
“Well, guess what,” Fizzy stood and looked at Orrin. “People aren’t supposed to turn into golems either, yet here I am.”
The Priest sighed and shook his head, but ultimately had to agree that there was no other explanation for this bizarre place called Lednik Dva. He went back to studying the runed structure, leaving the other two to their devices.
“You know, he makes a good point,” Plus agreed. “I never thought about it since Boxxy made it seem so natural, but it shouldn’t be this easy to claim a dungeon, right?”
Don’t underestimate Artificers. If a three-month-old-box could figure out a way to do it, the most brilliant mind our world has ever seen would as well.
“Okay, but where would she even get a core?”
She probably stole it from that other dungeon Orrin mentioned.
“I guess. Just makes me wonder if Beatrice has her finger in this whole thing.”
Oh, I’m almost certain of it. The way we wound up locked in here was like puzzle pieces falling into place. For whatever reason, Donny wanted us to get stuck in this Vault, and I’m going to make the most of it. I’m also curious about what it is that’s got his kettle in a boil.
“Hey, boss?” Tony called out to her. “I think I found somethin’ you might like.”
The Shaman pulled said something out of that cupboard he’d been sifting through. At a glance it was a mechanized tool of some kind, and a big one at that. Its dimensions were similar to those of Fizzy’s novelty wrench, except it was thicker along the handle and even bulkier around the business end. This was probably used to work on that massive automaton in the corner. More importantly, Tony was right about the golem’s tastes.
“That’s so cool! Give it here!”
The hobgoblin struggled a bit with the thing’s heft, but nevertheless did as ordered and tossed it into his handler’s open hands. Looking it over up close and with a bit of metal-reading, Fizzy determined this item could transform into a number of tools with varying configurations each. It was currently in the shape of a welding apparatus of some kind, and would likely stay that way for a while. The gears and bearings that made this thing work were worn and warped from overuse, and its internal battery was long-dead. The internal mechanisms could potentially be repaired or salvaged, so it was likely that its creator tucked away in a corner telling herself she’d get around to fixing it eventually, but never did. Fizzy had been there, done that, and intended to do so again. She stuffed it in her Bag of Holding with the intent of having a go at restoring it later. She then realized she might need some extra parts, so she also grabbed a few interesting gizmos and doodads that were lying around and in relatively good shape. Actually why stop there and not just swipe an entire toolbox? Which was what she did.
Meanwhile Orrin had gotten a massive tome out of his own enchanted pouch. It was his most treasured possession - an encyclopedia of Percepeia left behind by one of his forebears. A copy of it, to be precise. Its original author had penned several years after the Boneshaper’s undead hordes had ravaged the giants’ homeland and forced them into exile. Considering it was also around that time that this facility was supposedly built, Orrin hoped the book might explain this relic’s presence here. No such luck, but it did shed some light as to the object’s purpose, which was going to prove very useful in this situation.
“Ah-hah! Friends, I have good news!” he turned to others with a huge smile. “I have found a way out!”
Tony and Fizzy immediately abandoned their rummaging and went over to see what he was on about.
“Where? Is it under this weird pole?” the golem asked.
“No, you are looking at it! I am quite certain this here,” he patted the wood-and-bone spire, “is an Astral Nail!”
“Ah. Excellent. What’s that?”
“A magical transportation device from my homeland! I know not what it’s doing here, but I believe it can deliver us away from this frozen tomb!”
“You do realize this place doesn’t allow teleportation, right? I’m pretty sure it works both ways.”
“That was my thought as well, but if that was true, then why is it in such a pride of place?”
Fizzy had to admit, that was a good point. The fact that this thing was situated in the center of this workspace implied Ms. Dragunova had put considerable time and effort into… whatever she was doing with it. The rubber cables hooked up to its base and the weird devices grafted to it supported this theory. Surely she would not go through all this trouble if she never intended to use it. Mayhaps she left some exception in the dungeon’s settings?
“Actually, if I’m reading this right,” Orrin double-checked his encyclopedia, “Astral Nails employ light magic rather than spatial, so perhaps that would not be affected by the wards.”
“How’s light magic supposed to move us? And to where?”
“I wish I could tell you more. All I know is that my ancestors were quite skilled in such mystical arts, as exemplified by the Lightbinder Job. It originated and flourished in Percepeia, but I’m afraid it is practically a lost art at this point.”
“Uh-huh. Tony?”
“Ye, boss?”
“Can you try and identify exactly what this thing does?”
“Okay.”
The hob went up to the spire and started inspecting it, waiting for his Magic Item Savant to kick in. Orrin wasn’t too happy with the greenskin getting so handsy with the relic, but he trusted Fizzy had good reason to give him that order.
“Eh… Can’t tell. Too complicated. Seems it needs a lot of de voodoo to do anything, though.”
“… The voodoo?” the giant asked.
“He means mana. I’m guessing that’s what the cabling’s for. Tony, keep checking that area for any grates or vents, I’m going to follow these and see where they lead.”
“Whatever.”
“Actually, before I do anything, Orrin?”
“Yes! How may I assist?”
“You’re sure this thing is safe and won’t just… I don’t know… vaporize us?”
“Quite so, quite so. Though it has been somewhat modified, Astral Nails were used quite a bit on Percepeia, not unlike the Forest Gates of the Republic. They were just smaller, and privately owned. Also they could potentially connect to any other Astral Nail out there, not just a fixed one.”
“That doesn’t answer my question, meatbag.”
“Ah, apologies. My point was that the practice would not be so widespread if it was not deemed safe.”
“Uh-huh. Well, I suppose that’s something. What about the destination? You say it can send us to any one of these things, but how many of them could possibly be out there?”
“That is a very good question, to which I do not have the answer. However, I reckon there is at least one other if the Original Artificer was experimenting with it. If that is thecase, I believe we should see a telling reaction once we activate it.”
“Hm. That’s a lot of reckoning and beliefs you’re throwing at me, very few facts.”
“Of course. I am a man of faith, if nothing else,” he smiled broadly.
“Uh-huh. Anyway, let’s see if I can figure out how to turn it on, then we’ll see.”
“Understandable. I shall be here if you have need of me.”
The golem went to follow those cables while Orrin resumed studying the Astral Nail and Tony kept rummaging around the outer edges. Of the three, Fizzy’s line of investigation yielded results first. The wires all fed into a control panel of some description. It was a big and bulky thing, with plenty of switches and gauges. It was impossible to miss, she just hadn’t gotten around to checking that area of the workshop-factory-laboratory. Fortunately, the labeling on it was intact. Unfortunately, it wasn’t in any language she could understand even though most of the letters were either identical or similar to the ones she knew. At least the numbers were the same, as were some symbols and designations that all Artificers used for measurements and such. Based on those she was able to discern most of this instrumentation had to do with coordinates and power output. She decided not to touch any of the dials, but there was a button that stood out. A big, round, and red one that also looked stuck. By the look of it, someone had pressed it in a bad way that prevented it from returning to its original position. Fizzy reached over and, without really thinking about it, nudged it from the side so it popped back up with a slight click.
*VRRRING*
*VRRRING*
“Vnimaniye! Vnimaniye!”
And as that synthetic voice started yelling again, this time accompanied by an obnoxiously loud siren, it occurred to the golem that, perhaps, she should not have touched that.
“Uh-oh.”
“Zapushchen protokol samounichtozheniya! Vzryv cherez tri minuty!”
Naturally both Tony and Orrin assumed defensive postures while Fizzy frantically scanned the panel for a way to turn it off. She tried the obvious thing of pressing the red button again, but that did nothing.
“Boss?! Wha’chu’do?!” the hob yelled over the alarm.
“I’m working on it!”
“Miss Fizzy, dare I say this does not bode well.”
“I said I’m working on it!”
“Did you try hitting the red button again?”
“I just did!”
“Sorry!”
She continued studying the controls, wary of hitting the wrong thing but also eager to turn off whatever that alarm was.
“Vzryv cherez dve minuty i tridtsat sekundy!”
The obnoxious voice certainly wasn’t helping.
“Tony! Will you find where that’s coming from and shut it up!”
“Okay, boss!”
The greenskin was getting quite pissed off at it as well, and got to work locating the source. It didn’t take long for him to figure out it was coming from an array of wall-mounted speaker-boxes strewn about the chamber. It took him even less to start chucking his axes at the blasted contraptions. He wasn’t sure what good this would do, but at the very least it was satisfying to watch them come crashing down amidst a shower of sparks.
“What would you have me do?!” Orrin asked the golem.
“I don’t know! Uh… Tell me if this does anything!”
Fizzy flipped a switch that she was fairly certain was for the power.
“Well, I do believe the Astral Nail is charging up now!”
“Oh, for Luigi’s sake!”
She was trying to shut things down, not turn on more of them. She briefly wondered if she should undo it, but felt it wouldn’t hurt to have that thing ready should the need arise.
“Vzryv cherez dve minuty!”
“Say, Fizzy? Is it me or is that voice… counting down?”
“What do you mean?”
“It goes off every thirty seconds, doesn’t it? Also, it’s saying words that sound a lot like ‘minutes’ and ‘seconds.’ To me, at least.”
The golem’s speeding thoughts came to a screeching halt as she strained her hearing. She was so focused on the control panel in front that she didn’t really bother to pay attention to what was actually being said. If her alter ego’s hunch was correct, then this could mean big, big trouble. So, with the aid of her Tick Counter Skill, she mentally tracked half a minute since the last announcement.
“Vzryv cherez odna minuta i tridtsat sekundy!”
Right on the dot.
“This is bad.”
“How bad?”
“I’m about 90% sure the Vault is about to self-destruct.”
“That’s bad.”
“Orrin!” she yelled over the alarms. “Is the thing still- Never mind!”
A glance in the giant’s direction revealed that the Astral Nail next to him was projecting a bubble of white light around it. If that wasn’t a ‘telling reaction’ indicating it was both functional and ready to go, then Fizzy had no idea what would be. The Priest himself seemed to be having second thoughts about it, but the golem couldn’t care less. Like it or not, that thing was her only way out before this Vault went sky-high. Well, either that or she could take her chances with the explosion. It wasn’t impossible for her to survive a boom of significant proportions considering just how durable her mithril hide was. However, this place was a dungeon, which meant it had a core that was likely overloading at this very moment. Heat and shrapnel were one thing, but getting reduced to dust in a Monotal-like Calamity?
“Vzryv cherez odna minuta!”
Yeah, Fizzy would rather take her chances with the light-gate-thing.
“Screw it.”
The golem abandoned the panel and dashed for the glowing pillar.
“Orrin! Tony! This place is about to go sky-high! Get in the light and pray to Jimmy we come out okay!”
The giant took her words to heart and, being the closest, overcame his hesitation and went into the white glow first. His body shone blindingly bright for a moment before vanishing in a shower of sparkling motes. A white beam of light shot upwards from the Astral Nail at the same time, going into a small opening in the ceiling far above. The same thing happened when Tony abandoned his pointless vandalism and followed in the giant’s footsteps. Fizzy was the last to go through. In an instant, her world turned from white and full of noise to utterly dark and devoid of sound. Another moment later she was tumbling down a steel ramp, denting it heavily as she did. She came to a stop feet-up at the bottom and quickly sprang upright, wrench at the ready.
At a glance, there didn’t seem to be any danger. Orrin and Tony were both there, likewise getting up from the ground. Behind them was the Astral Nail that had received them, though built of metal and wires rather than wood and bone. It was situated atop a circular platform much like the one in the Vault, though this one was elevated a few meters off of the uneven terrain. As for where the structure was standing, it was at the bottom of a crater. A very deep, very round, and very green crater. It wasn’t overgrown or covered with moss or anything like that. The stone itself had this pale, almost sickeningly green hue to it that didn’t seem natural. It was also completely barren without any plants or fungi to be seen. That part wasn’t all that strange considering how utterly dry this place was.
Strange sediments aside, the colossal hole was filled with all manner of ancient machinery and a few shack-like buildings. Assuming these too were the Original Artificer’s handiwork, they had likely been here for the better part of nine decades and actually looked the part. Unlike the well-preserved Vault, the elements had their field day with this stuff, leaving it covered in rust, buried in dust, or otherwise falling apart. Not all of the debris scattered around were totalled by erosion, however. The mangled parts strewn around and the oddly round holes in the ramshackle buildings implied someone had voraciously vandalized the site. That was the situation at ground level. Looking up at the crater’s entrance, there was a glass-and-steel ceiling that had remained remarkably intact given its age. It was covered in dirt and grime, of course, but had enough clean spots in it to let through a white beam of light that fell directly onto the Astral Nail. Likely a part of its function, all things considered.
“Well. That could’ve gone worse,” Fizzy remarked. “Any idea where we are?”
“Somewhere very deep, or somewhere very high up,” the giant replied. “The air here is quite thin.”
“Eh, it’s not that bad. Dem basilisk mines were worse. Dis place doesn’t feel right, though.”
“Care to elaborate on that?”
“Can’t put my finger on it yet, boss, but de stone gives me weird vibes. Unfamiliar. Unwelcome.”
He was probably talking about a Shaman thing, as neither Fizzy nor Orrin had that sensation.
“Could be we were transported to Velos,” the giant suggested. “I have heard the southern continent overflows with so much life that the land itself seems to reject civilization.”
“Dis don’t look like no overflowin’ life to me,’ blondie,” the hob pointed at the barren rocks. “Also, you might not have noticed, but I ain’t exactly civilized, either.”
“I am merely offering a suggestion, my friend.”
“How about we just go find out?”
Fizzy’s suggestion was ultimately the wisest course of action. The three of them could talk circles around each other, but they clearly had too little information to work with. So, it was decided they would venture forth and attempt to get their bearings. Thankfully leaving the crater was going to be quite simple. Though the top was sealed and the walls looked quite unscalable without climbing gear, there were three tunnels along the edges of the crater. Judging by their square shapes and the marks on the rock, they were likely dug out by some of the heavy machinery that lay abandoned. And if none of those lead anywhere, the Astral Nail was a potential way out as well. Going back to the Vault was out of the question, but perhaps Orrin and Fizzy could figure out how to recalibrate it to send them somewhere else.
*KERKLUNK*
And then the thing snapped in half and went dead. Rusted and weathered as it was, the strain of the magic upon it proved too much. With that option gone, their only recourse was to pick a tunnel and hope for the best. None of them had any idea which one to start with, so it was decided - mostly by Fizzy - to leave it up to chance. She picked up an old iron pole from the ground, set it upright on the mostly level Astral Nail platform, and let it fall wherever gravity would take it. The rod clattered in the general direction of the biggest passageway, which was an obvious choice to begin with. That settled, the goblin, the golem, and the giant set off to discover where in the world they were. Fortunately their randomly chosen tunnel quickly led them up and to the surface. Unfortunately, they discovered they were stuck in a barren, featureless wasteland of stone and dust that bore the same strange hue as the chamber they arrived in. But that wasn’t the worst of it, not even close. As depressing as the landscape was, it wasn’t anywhere near as concerning as the beautiful blue, green, and white orb drifting through the star-filled sky.
“… Is that what I think it is?” Orrin warily asked.
“Yup,” the golem flatly confirmed.
“… And do you have any idea how we’ll get back?”
“Nope.”
“… Balls.”
It would appear that, rather than being locked in the Vault Beneath the Mountain, the trio was now stuck on Tascuna - the biggest of Terrania’s three moons.