The moon-roaches erupted in pairs all around the trio, much as they did before. Twenty of them in total, just like Tony said. He and Fizzy instantly charged the closest one while Orrin readied his sludge-thrower. Unfortunately, between that screeching automaton and the rather sudden attack, he seemed unable to make the thing work. He pulled the trigger on the handle several times, but nothing came out. The six bugs in front of him seemed wary of the strange weapon at first. However, now that it was clear it wasn’t going to do anything they did not hesitate to swarm the Priest. He took a step back and started swinging his staff, leaving the nozzle dangling uselessly from the back-mounted fluid tank. The giant succeeded in swatting two of the bugs away and elbowed a third, but the rest got past his defenses. A trio of jaws and a half-dozen spike-tipped tendrils drilled into his legs and midsection.
Orrin grit his teeth and invoked Hour of Need, one of his Priest Skills. His body surged with divine energy, empowering and quickening his next three holy Spells. He used to instantly invoke Holy Nova, forcing the damnable creatures off of him with a burst of golden light that also scorched their carapace. He followed with an Aegis to shield himself from further harm. He shouted a quick warning to the other two to close their eyes and cast a Dazzling Flare. It went off like a flashbang, stunning all the bugs around him in a wide radius for a good three to five seconds.
“The bloody thing doesn’t work!” he shouted to the golem.
“What?! Oh, for- Don’t move!”
A quick glance at his equipment told Fizzy exactly what was wrong. Rather than waste time explaining, she decided to just take action. She ran over to the Priest, grabbed the dangling nozzle, then reached over and hit the ‘on’ switch on the side of the fluid tank. Immediately the device buzzed and hummed to life. This time when the handle’s trigger was pulled, the nozzle let loose a spray of bright blue foam. She swept around in a wide arc, liberally covering both the ground and the bugs in the stuff. She very nearly coated Tony too, but the hob managed to hop back out of the splash zone. When the bugs recovered from the Dazzling Flare and realized what was going on, they proceeded to freak out. All of them scattered away, practically tripping over each other as they fled. Most headed into the forest while a few others retreated underground. Within seconds the only thing left around Orrin, Tony, and Fizzy was a deforested clearing covered in shimmering blue goop.
“Hah-ha! Look at them run!” the giant cheered.
“See? What’d I tell ya?” the golem struck a victory pose.
“Well, dat was easy,” the goblin remarked.
The radiant construct then turned towards the greenskin with one of her usual killer glares.
“Don’t pull a stunt like that on me again.”
“Ah? Wha’chu talkin’ bout?”
“That ‘prank’ with the spiky boar thing? I know you did it for shits and giggles. I’m not stupid.”
She had been around Tony long enough to recognize something he had in common with a certain malicious box. He liked to mess with people, push their buttons for kicks. However, whereas Boxxy did that to gain an edge over them, Tony did it purely for entertainment. Fizzy normally didn’t mind that kind of behavior too much - Nigel knew, she had her own fair share of disruptive quirks - but not when those antics resulted in a setback this severe.
“Okay, boss. Whatever you say.”
Yeah, he was definitely going to do it again.
“Fizzy, might I make a suggestion?”
“What is it, Orrin?”
“Can we not just follow the machine’s trail?”
He pointed at the deep tracks carved into the soft forest soil. They were so obvious that even he, as the least perceptive of the group, could clearly make them out. And even if that changed further down the line, they had a Level 50 Ranger with a maxed-out Tracking Skill. Fizzy felt quite silly as she completely neglected to consider this perfectly reasonable recourse, and realized she might have overreacted when she slammed Tony against the ground. Though, in her defense, that whole situation was quite high on the stress. All things considered, she maintained a surprisingly level head throughout that whole affair. Or at least, that’s what she told herself via Plus.
Such self-delusions aside, the group decided they might as well follow the trail. They ran into some trouble not long after in the shape of yet another moon-roach ambush, but a quick spray of blue foam saw them scatter just as quickly. This happened once more about fifteen minutes later. Fizzy had to handle the nozzle both times as, even though she reminded Orrin about the power switch, it was in a far too awkward position for him to actually press it. As such the giant was relegated to simply carrying the gear, though he did not mind being used as a beast of burden. He didn’t have Fizzy’s technical expertise or Tony’s survival skills, and both of them had restorative magic of their own. He felt like he wasn’t pulling his own weight, so he would not complain about the manual labor.
After following the trail for about an hour in total, the group finally caught up to the runaway droid. Unfortunately, something else had gotten to it first. It lay smashed and broken against a boulder, as if smashed by a massive hammer. The perpetrator was only a few steps away. It was another enormous beast, a lizard this time. It had a bulbous body covered in hard bumps and a muscular tail tipped with a massive bone growth that definitely looked sturdy enough to do the deed. The hammer-tail was grazing peacefully until the golem’s group tried to get close, at which point it grew rather agitated. After a brief stand-off featuring a lot of snorts, it charged at them eager to defend its territory. It was the last mistake it would make as Orrin intercepted and halted its charge, Fizzy pinned down its tail, and Tony carved into its neck.
With the nuisance taken care of and potential food secured, the golem went to inspect the wreckage. As she feared, it was completely offline. There was no way to repair it or otherwise determine where it was headed. So, she simply salvaged it for parts. Meanwhile Tony and Orrin did the same with the beast. It took a lot of effort to pull off its natural armor and get at the meat underneath, but they were ultimately able to succeed in securing several days’ worth of sustenance. Once they were done picking apart the bodies, the trio had a quick strategy meeting to discuss their next step.
After a bit of back and forth they decided to continue exploring the woods while they still had daylight. They were searching for two things - more automatons, and running water. During their search they ran into a number of birds and herbivores, the latter being both large and aggressive. No predators or smaller beasties, curiously enough. The group also had one more encounter with the moon-roaches, but it was little more than an annoyance at that stage. After that the bugs seemed to start actively avoiding them, with Tony spotting a few retreating into the distance before the group even got near. They were learning.
All of that aside, however, their search yielded no results. Not only were they unable to locate any more machinery, but the forest was completely devoid of bodies of water. No rivers, no ponds, no streams, not even a puddle. This made no sense since the soil wasn’t dry and vegetation was plentiful, if a bit spread out. This wasn’t just a string of bad luck. If Tony knew his woodlands, they wouldn’t find a water source no matter how much they looked. As best as he could tell with his shamanistic abilities, almost all of the moisture in this forest was coming up from deep underground. The trees in particular had ridiculously long roots that went beyond the range of his Tremorsense. Upon sharing this revelation with the others, Orrin finally remembered something. It wasn’t like him to be this forgetful, a side effect of this mysterious illness perhaps?
Either way, he cast another Greater Cleanse just to be sure, then pulled that strange bubble-fruit he found earlier from his Bag of Holding.
“Hey, Tony. Do you think we can drink whatever’s in this thing?”
“Hm? Where’d you get dat?”
“The trees? They fall out if you shake them hard enough. Not every time, but often enough.”
The hobgoblin was supremely confused. He looked up at the sparse canopy. He saw a few similar-looking beads dangling from branches here and there, but even the largest was no bigger than a fist. Certainly nowhere near this melon-sized specimen. Perhaps those up there weren’t ripe yet?
“So, do you think we could use these?” the giant pressed.
“Maybe. Hand dat over.”
The melon-sized globe changed hands, and the hobgoblin pressed his ear to it. He knocked on it a few times with his knuckles, then grasped an axe out of thin air. He tapped the sphere a few more times with the handle before striking it with the back of the blade. The transparent blue shell cracked and crumbled around that spot, and the water within gushed forth. It was clean, clear, and immensely refreshing as Tony and then Orrin took turns drinking their fill. That one combined with the other five the giant had collected earlier would last the two of them for a week with a bit of rationing. So, while it was disappointing to ultimately lose that automaton lead, the group had secured enough supplies to last the meatbags for the foreseeable future. As such they decided to return to the Landing Site while the sun was still out. They weren’t sure exactly how long the day-night cycle on Tascuna was, but it was much shorter than Terrania’s, and Fizzy didn’t want to take her chances with the nocturnal swarms.
The return trip was largely uneventful, though the increased heat of the badlands was quite taxing on the meatbags during the last three hours of the long walk. On the way back they sporadically discussed what they should do going forward, though each had a different idea. Tony insisted they focus on securing shelter within the forested region, Fizzy wanted to search for more functional Original Artificer tech, and Orrin believed it was best if the golem focused her efforts on the Astral Nail. It was mostly just idle chatter to kill time during the long and dull walk, as they’d have to do all those things eventually.
Once they were back in the crater, the two food-eaters started preparing and preserving the hammer-tail meat they’d collected with the aid of some rock salt the Shaman found on the way back. Fizzy returned to her improvised workshop and resumed tinkering. Nothing ground-breaking, just trying out some of the new parts she’d collected and toying with a few minor ideas. One of those was designing a maker’s mark to put on her Iron Teeth. Though she didn’t get a chance to use the modified wrench much, it performed quite adequately during that brief confrontation with Orrin and later against the hammer-tail. The golem thus immersed herself in her work once again, completely losing track of time until something yet again interrupted her focus. This time around the cause had nothing to do with her companions, but with the consequences of her actions.
[Your target has expired due to the mysterious toxin.]
“… Who the what now?”
That notification came completely out of nowhere just as the Artificer was doing a bit of welding with her multi-tool.
“Status.”
“Something happen?” her alter ego piped up.
“I just got a message stating that I apparently killed something via an ‘unknown toxin.’”
“Huh? For real?”
“Yeah. Got some Metal Golem XP for it, too. Guess the blue gunk got to one of those bugs.”
“Nice! More Levels are always good! Also we need an actual name for it. Something catchy like… azurite?”
“That’s already a thing. It’s a type of crystal with minor water-attuned magical properties.”
“Damn. What about Blue Kiss?”
“Alcoholic cocktail.”
“… Jigglygoo?”
“That’s just gross. Look, let’s just stick with blue sludge, okay? We all know what it is. Once we get off this rock, then we can worry about-”
[Your target has expired due to the mysterious toxin.]
“Oh, there it goes again.”
[Your target has expired due to the mysterious toxin.]
“And again. Guess it’s slow acting but quite potent, huh?”
“Yeah. Good thing you warned the guys not to touch it. Would be a shame if they keeled over, too.”
“It would be quite boring without them, I suppose. Anyway, where was I?”
Fizzy went back to welding, but couldn’t focus as that same message kept popping up in her head with increasing frequency. She tried to count at first, but lost track at around sixty. That alone was way more targets than the bugs she sprayed initially, yet the notifications showed no signs of stopping. At one point they got so numerous that the golem actually felt like it was putting a strain on her consciousness, and her Metal Golem Job’s Level skyrocketed accordingly. This advancement was welcome, but this stream of information was clear evidence that the sludge was far, far more virulent than she gave it credit for. Contagious, even. Wait, was this the cause of the sickness that was pestering Orrin and Tony?
The Paladin emerged from her workshop to check on the two of them. Thankfully they looked perfectly fine. With the abundant food and water they collected on that expedition they were now as strong and healthy as they were before arriving on Tascuna. Still, as the notifications continued to trickle in, she couldn’t just sit here and do nothing. She told them she was heading out for a bit and ran off towards the forest. It probably wasn’t smart of her to venture out into the wastes on her own, especially during the night, but she took some precautions. One of those was to bring a miniaturized sludge-thrower she’d cobbled together earlier, and the other was to set up a spotlight that shone up into the pitch-black sky. With the weapon and the beacon, she had no fear of getting lost or ambushed by moon-roaches. Travelling alone also meant she could run the whole way, allowing her to cover that huge distance in half the time.
Once she entered the forest zone, she took out a flashlight and tried to retrace her steps. She instantly regretted not bringing Tony along since all this greenery and woodlands looked the same to her. Thankfully she didn’t have to wander too long before she noticed a blue glow in the distance - probably traces of all that sludge she sprayed around earlier. Sure enough, a closer inspection revealed she had managed to find the site of the second moon-roach attack of the day. The ground was still covered in the glowing gunk, and everything around it was either dead or in a state of dying. The grass and trees were wilted and falling apart, and the seemingly unharmed corpse of a moon-roach just lay splayed out in the dirt. Searching around she found many more bodies of other creatures, mostly birds and bugs but also a few of those plus-sized plant-eaters. The most concerning part was that this wasn’t focused around the area. She kept finding mysteriously expired things for kilometers around, seemingly at random.
It then occurred to her that maybe - just maybe - the wasteland surrounding the Landing Site was caused by the haphazardly stored sludge. The stuff was clearly far more dangerous than she could have suspected, and she had no idea how or why it was killing things. Best as she could tell, simply being near it would ‘infect’ creatures until they just kind of keeled over hours, maybe even days later. She’d never even heard of something just radiating death like that. She couldn’t have. After all, Terrania’s science wasn’t advanced enough for anyone there to know about this phenomenon. They didn’t even have a word for it.
Otherworlders like Ekaterina Dragunova did, though, and that word was radiation.
Fizzy, at least, was able to piece enough together to recognize the immense danger Orrin and Tony were in. They looked fine since they had healing magic and fairly high Endurance (END), but it was only a matter of time before they too succumbed to this ‘mysterious toxin.’ Oh, hey. That was a good word for it - mystox. Such trifling matters aside, once the golem was certain of her findings she immediately headed for the pillar of light on the horizon. She had to warn the meatbags to relocate before they got themselves killed and left her. Alone. Again.
The tale has been taken without authorization; if you see it on Amazon, report the incident.
*PACHEW*
The creeping thought was rudely interrupted when a concentrated beam of heat flashed out of the foliage and struck her squarely in the chest. It barely did any damage since her fire-resistant top absorbed most of it, but another struck her head a half-second later, a third to the belly close behind. The golem recognized she was under attack at that moment, and her mind instantly switched gears from concern to combat. She spun around to the side to throw off her assailant’s aim and then flashed her light towards the source of those shots. For a brief moment, she saw a face. Not the bestial visage of some moon-monster, but what appeared to be an actual person. She couldn’t get a good look since the stranger pulled back into the foliage within moments, but the golem was certain of what she saw.
“Hey! Get the fuck back here!”
Fizzy yelled as she gave chase to her assailant. This particular part of the forest wasn’t dead - at least, not yet - so there were plenty of trees and the occasional brush to hide behind. The golem could still hear footsteps and rustling, but they were soft and difficult to pin down. At best she could determine a vague direction. Still, that was enough for Fizzy to start handing out a bunch of little gifts that were addressed ‘to whom it may concern.’ The formerly quiet forest was rocked to its core as the golem’s high-explosive grenade ripped clean through a small cluster of trees. She rapidly reloaded and let loose a second time, firing indiscriminately into the foliage. Her third bomb yielded some success as there was a scream mixed in with the explosion. She charged into the smoke and flames, wrench in one hand and flashlight in the other.
What she found was indeed a person. A woman, most likely. She looked a lot like a gnome, albeit even shorter and with dark purple hair and skin. Thick stripes of red war paint marked her cheeks and chin, and she was wearing the brown carapace of a moon-roach’s head as a helmet. Her clothing gave off similarly tribal vibes as she was covered in an amalgamation of bangles, feathers, bandages, and hides, yet had no shoes. What stood out as clearly out of place was the high-tech weapon she was carrying. It was a rifle of some kind with a number of colorful crystals sticking out of the back and top - probably the source of those heat beams. As for its owner, she was clearly a seasoned fighter considering how well she was handling the shrapnel lodged in her right thigh. Though she struggled to stay on her feet, she not only remained upright but also lifted her weapon at the momentarily confused golem.
Now that she was close enough to clearly see her assailant, Fizzy’s Champion of Chaos instantly warned her of the impending attack’s trajectory. The golem sidestepped it before the gnome even pulled the trigger and closed in with a swing of her wrench. The blow was sure to land and shatter several bones at the least, but a piece of stone suddenly popped up from the ground and took the strike for her. Another gnome in similar garb then revealed himself from above. This one was a male with blue-gray skin, his weapon of choice a metal sword lavishly decorated with gemstones and a small stone buckler strapped to his forearm. He thrust his blade down at Fizzy. She was tempted to let it hit just so she could watch it shatter against her mithril plating and then laugh at the idiot, but listened to her fighting instinct and pulled back. Having missed its mark, the seemingly flimsy weapon stabbed into the ground. Moments later, the soil split up and exploded in a strange pattern reminiscent of a snowflake up close.
The golem sprang into a counterattack without missing a beat. She lunged at the guy before he could pull out his weapon, her wrench coming down in an overhead smash. The gnome flicked his finger upward and another pillar of stone shot out of the dirt and blocked her attack. He was clearly a magic user of some kind, probably a Shaman. It was unfortunate for him, as Fizzy had a flawless track record against the Job. She pulled her weapon back and kept the pressure on with repeated swings, forcing the man to repeatedly guard. He was so focused on the big and heavy lump of steel that he didn’t notice the golem swing her flashlight with her other hand. The improvised weapon found its mark and cracked him across the temple, ruining his concentration. Fizzy then took yet another swing with her wrench in an attempt to crack his head wide open.
The woman in the back had recovered by then, however. Her partner had bought her enough time to not only down a healing potion, but also line up a shot. Her laser rifle hit Fizzy right in the eye, blinding it and severely throwing off her aim. As such her wrench only grazed the male warrior’s bug-helm without inflicting any serious damage. The guy then pulled back and chanted a Spell in a strange language. A dull gong-like sound washed over the golem. The wrench in her hand rattled fiercely as it resonated with the noise, the vibrations nearly ripping it apart. The sludge thrower she was carrying wasn’t as lucky and fell apart, its contents spilling all over Fizzy’s back side. Her mithril plating, however, was unaffected, and she wasted no time in lashing out.
“Grand Slam!”
The Martial Art’s huge swing kicked up a fierce wind as it narrowly missed knocking the gnome’s head clean off his shoulders. He and his female partner then disengaged with nimble steps and split up, but they weren’t running away. What followed was a drawn out engagement where they pelted the golem with ranged attacks while constantly giving her the run around. She had to hand it to these guys, they were certainly slippery. However, their offense was piddling at best. The woman’s heat blasts were the most dangerous, but focusing on her made it easier to predict, dodge, and block her beams. Meanwhile the guy kept throwing destructive vibrations and magical stone projectiles her way that steadily chipped away at the construct’s HP. He was definitely inflicting damage, but it wasn’t nearly enough to bring her down once she activated both Parallel Plot and Engine of Destruction. The issue was she couldn’t hit back. She tried her grenade launcher again, but the guy invoked some Spell or Skill that reflected the shot right back at her. Thankfully Plus reacted faster than Fizzy and was able to repel the projectile in a random direction with a quick use of Magentize.
Things couldn’t keep going this way, though. There was only so much heat Fizzy’s body could take before it started melting from Engine of Destruction, and this was shaping up to be an extremely prolonged battle as neither side seemed willing to back down. The only question was who would falter first - the golem’s superheated frame or the gnomes’ stamina and magical reserves. The answer was neither, as one of many shots to the chaotic Paladin’s face triggered her Armor of Anarchy. A jolt of green lightning shot out towards the sharpshooter the instant her attack landed. It struck the weapon in her hands, completely scorching its barrel while also shocking its wielder. The woman recovered after a few seconds, but the only thing that came out of her laser rifle was smoke and clicking. The weapon was trashed, and with it, so was the duo’s main source of damage. It was at that moment they decided to retreat, vanishing into the darkness of the forest just as suddenly as they’d appeared. Silence returned to the forest, aside from the crackling flames left over from Fizzy’s indiscriminate bombing.
“Fuck! What was that about?!”
“Maybe they didn’t like you killing their forest,” Plus suggested.
“I’m not sure that’s the cause. Something about their demeanor was… intense. Like, this was personal somehow.”
“I guess. Also, they had some really nice moves.”
“I will admit they were skilled, yes. However, they have the same weakness as the bugs out here.”
“Oh? What weakness is that?”
“It appears that things on Tascuna seem like fighting solo or in pairs. Unfortunately for these locals, our team is a trio. Numerical superiority for the win!”
“You tell ‘em sister! Though, now that you mention it-”
“Crap! I forgot! Parallel Zero!”
Now wasn’t the time for a friendly chat with herself - she had meatbags to preserve. Fizzy resumed her mad dash through the forest and towards the guiding beacon in the distance. It only took her about five more minutes to leave the forested area and another ninety to cross the badlands. On the way she reviewed the scuffle with the gnomes several times over with Plus. Something about that confrontation bugged her. And no, it wasn’t the fact that there was some weird tribe of gnomes on the bloody moon. That was strange and certainly warranted some investigation, but the most concerning part of the whole encounter was the magic that guy used. It was close to a Shaman’s, but also clearly distinct. For one thing, it used a whole bunch of earth-attuned Spells and little else besides. She was also fairly certain he was using magic that manipulated magnetic fields, one of which was responsible for bouncing back that grenade. There was no Job that Fizzy knew of that could do that, at least not to such an extent. As for the female’s weapon, it had that distinct look of something kludged together from scrap and salvage, not unlike the stuff the golem had been making. The implication was that these gnomes were quite adept at tinkering themselves, despite their more primitive culture.
Then came the really big and unanswerable questions. For instance, when and how did these people get on Tascuna? Did they arrive from Terrania, or were they truly native to the moon? And just how many of them were there? Also, why did they attack Fizzy? As the golem told herself, it almost seemed like they had a grudge against her. Whatever their reason, they had tipped their hand to the wrong golem. Now that she knew they were here and saw how they fought, she could devise some countermeasures in case they crossed paths again. She considered weaponizing the mystox against them, but that was far too slow-acting to be of use in a fight. Not to mention that, now that she knew what kind of environmental devastation the stuff caused, spreading it any further put her in danger of violating Zephyra’s Taboo and taking a massive hit to her Faith (FTH). That just wasn’t worth it.
In any event, she didn’t really need ranged options to handle those gnomes. A quick and reliable way to close the gap between them would be ideal. Armored Charge wasn’t an option since they were far too small and nimble. They could, and had, dodged out of its way with ease, and the golem couldn’t stop herself midway through the turbo tackle unless she hit something. Thankfully, a certain something had been going on in the back of her head the entire time that could potentially provide a solution.
[Your target has expired due to the mysterious toxin.]
[Your target has expired due to the mysterious toxin.]
[Your target has expired due to the mysterious toxin.]
[Congratulations, you are now a Level 40 Metal Golem! STR +3. END +3. AGI +2. FTH +1.]
[Your target has expired due to the mysterious toxin.]
The rate at which the mystox worked its lethal magic had slowed somewhat, but it had still been frantic enough to boost her Monster Job up four whole Levels in just four hours. It was an incredible surge in power the likes of which she hadn’t experienced since Boxxy’s boot camp shortly after she became a Paladin. And with a lot less physical and psychological abuse, to boot. Unfortunately, the new selection of Skills at her disposal didn’t have a better alternative to Armored Charge, though there was something to deal with another potential weakness of hers. The ability was called Heat Exchange, and it had a long laundry list of features and parameters that basically boiled down to increasing her MP generation via Engine of Destruction while reducing the self-harm from the intentional overheating. It also gave her the option of venting all that thermal energy over the course of 5 seconds to rapidly cool herself down while also scorching everything within 2 meters. This active component had a ten minute recharge timer, but would allow the construct to run hot for much longer before she had to worry about something melting or breaking.
Fizzy didn’t pick up the Skill just yet, though. She knew from past experiences that certain golem abilities physically modified her construction. The process could take several minutes and would leave her paralyzed for the duration. This Heat Exchange ability seemed like it would be one of those time-consuming upgrades, and she couldn’t afford to sit through it right now. She still had a giant and a hobgoblin to attend to. When she finally returned to the Landing Site, she found that their conditions had worsened drastically, just as she’d feared. The hobgoblin was sitting cross-legged in a corner, sweat rolling off him like a waterfall as he rocked back and forth while mumbling something. He was doing some magic, judging by the deep green glow washing over him now and then. The giant was leaning heavily on his staff, his breathing ragged and body mass significantly reduced. A patch of skin literally peeled off his arm and fell to the ground to join countless other similarly shed pieces.
“That is extremely gross,” the golem couldn’t help but remark.
“Ah… Fizzy… Is that you, my child?”
“Of course, it’s me! Who else- Oh.”
Orrin slowly turned towards her, revealing that his deep blue eyes had gone pale and white. They likely no longer worked. He had also lost both his golden locks and matching beard, leaving his face a bald, wrinkled mess. Both in appearance and demeanor he seemed like an old man at death’s door, rather than the youthful spirit full of life he had shown previously. The mystox had clearly taken a psychological toll on him in addition to the physical degradation.
“It is good to hear your voice once more,” the withered giant smiled. “I feared I wouldn’t have the chance before the darkness finally claimed me.”
“What are you talking about? You’re a Priest! Just heal yourself!”
“I did.”
The weak smile he wore crumbled into a look of utter despair.
“My magic fails me, Fizzy. I invoked Solus’ grace so many times I lost count, but it cannot uproot this damnable illness. I fear my Lord has abandoned me for daring to encroach on His celestial domain.”
“Nobody’s abandoned anyone. No offense, but your God probably doesn’t even know you exist.”
“Ah, then it is as I feared. I am unworthy of Solus’ grace after all…”
“I didn’t mean it like that! Look, this has nothing to do with divine punishment. There’s just too much mystox down here.”
“… Mystox?”
“Short for ‘mysterious toxin.’ The blue glowy stuff.”
There was an entire shed’s worth of lead barrels full of that stuff just a few steps away, with many of the containers laying open. In fact, the blue sludge was leaking out of it as Fizzy spoke, not to mention her backside was coated in it. Though she knew not exactly how it worked, the sheer amount of it and the giant’s extended exposure likely resulted in his body being far too contaminated for his magic to purge it. Either that or it just immediately built up once he did. Whatever the case, the first step towards alleviating this issue was obvious. Maybe it was too little too late at this point, but it was worth a shot.
“We need to leave right now.”
“I do not know if I can move from this spot.”
“Of course, you can. You’re still pretty big and strong, so let’s get those feet moving.”
“No, you misunderstand. It is not the strength of my legs that keeps me here, but the weight of my sins.”
“… I don’t have time for this.”
The golem walked over to where she was keeping that push-cart she used to transport the gear she made for Orrin during their first outing. She pushed the mostly empty mystox tanks off of it and wheeled it over to the delusional giant. She then viciously hit him in the knee with her wrench. In his weakened state, the man’s joint gave out with a nasty crack, causing him to topple into the cart with a scream of pain. Fizzy ignored his pained protests and religious ramblings as she tied his hands to it with a heavy chain, then went to check on Tony. The hobgoblin was in a better state physically, but far worse mentally. He had succumbed to some kind of delirium and was completely unresponsive. He just kept rocking back and forth while chanting his magic over and over. The golem bashed him in the back of the skull to knock him out, then dragged his bony ass over to the cart and tossed him on top of Orrin. She thought about bringing the food and water as well, but decided it was best to leave them be since they were likely contaminated as well. She did crack open a bubble-fruit over herself to wash off as much of the mystox as she could.
Her preparations settled, the golem got ready for the trip.
“Parallel One.”
“Whoop-whoop! It’s go time!” Plus cheered while striking a pose.
“… What the fuck was that?”
“A little catchphrase I’m trying out. What do you think?”
“Needs work. Also, now’s not the time. I need you to keep these two idiots alive while I get them away from here.”
“Aye, aye!” the Parallel saluted herself. “Leave them to me!”
The golem thus wheeled her patients up the tunnel and pushed them across Tascuna’s surface while her other self alternated Cleanse and Holy Light Spells. She also turned on Engine of Destruction since the combination of constant chanting and Parallel Plot was a huge drain on her magical reserves. This quickly left her heated frame glowing bright amidst the darkened wasteland. Thankfully pushing a cart demanded less overall movement than active combat, so she wasn’t in danger of overheating anytime soon. More importantly, the treatment seemed to be working at staving off the infection. Tony and Orrin’s physical conditions cycled between instantly getting a bit better and immediately growing worse. In terms of mental states the hobgoblin remained unconscious while the giant turned completely silent, likely lost in introspective given his crisis of faith.
As for where Fizzy was taking them all, she had opted to head in the opposite direction of the tainted forest. If she was understanding things correctly, most of the moon outside this wasteland would be teeming with life. Therefore, the odds were good that they’d find more food and water without much difficulty so long as they were literally anywhere else, and being far away from that environmental disaster seemed like a good idea. There was still the matter of the moon-roaches. Fending them off would be tricky without exploiting their entirely understandable aversion to mystox, but Fizzy would have to cross that bridge when she got to it. At the very least they didn’t dare to encroach on this tainted land, so the group were safe for the time being.
Or at least so the golem assumed until she heard some high-pitched buzzing less than ten minutes after leaving. The glowing golem let go of the cart and reached for her weapon, ready to bash some bugs. To her surprise, it wasn’t an insect that found them. It wasn’t even a creature, but a construct. A curious little quad-copter no bigger than a breadbox hovered just above, its frame lit up by a tiny white light on its left side and a red one on the right. What looked to be a mechanical eye in the middle flicked back and forth between the golem and her infirm companions. Was it… studying them? Perhaps this one had some actual intelligence to it. Fizzy decided to test that idea with a friendly greeting to show she meant no harm.
“Hello, friend,” she gave it a wave.
*KHRRT* *BKHZZZT*
The machine reacted with some crackling sounds that didn’t seem like they were caused by a mechanical fault. In fact, though devoid of words, that noise was quite similar to those voice-boxes that yelled at her back in the Vault. Fizzy interpreted this as an attempt at communication, though she couldn’t be sure.
“Khrt-! Hello? Ah, there eet ees. Can you heer me down there?”
Actually, scratch that. That was most definitely an attempt at communication. A largely successful one, at that. Though garbled, that voice was of a mature woman whose words were clearly understandable despite her strange and heavy accent.
“Uh, yeah. I’m pretty sure half of Tascuna can hear you.”
It was also really loud.
“Horosho!” she sounded elated. “Then, if you would kindly stand still, I will send something to pick you up and bring you to me so that we can discuss treatment for your friends.”
“Can you cure them?”
“Yes. I can.”
“At what cost?”
“That ees what we will discuss.”
“I see. Before I agree to anything, can I at least know who I’m speaking to?”
“There will be time for proper introductions later.”
“Let me rephrase that. Either you tell me your name, or I’m blowing that buzzing nuisance out of the sky.”
There was a brief pause as the woman on the other end of the conversation processed this demand.
“You would risk your companions’ lives for something so small?”
“Small things matter. Also, these idiots are expendable. Losing them would be inconvenient, but I’m not walking into some ambush on their account.”
That was a bit of a bluff since the golem had gotten rather attached to the boys, but ultimately would put her safety above theirs ten out of ten times.
“Ha! Hahaha! Oh, I like you, devochka! Very good. My name ees Ekaterina Dragunova.”
“Yes! I knew it!”
Now probably wasn’t the time or place to celebrate with a fist pump, but she couldn’t contain her joy.
Fizzy had, for probably the first time ever, managed to correctly guess what crazy shit her rollercoaster of a life would hit next.