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Screw magic, I'm using a gun!
Chapter 7: Swift coup with no (a couple) problems

Chapter 7: Swift coup with no (a couple) problems

The reactor on my chest spun and spun ever faster. I could feel each wave of energy that escaped the makeshift reactor careened through my body, making me jerk awkwardly every two seconds. My wings flapped in the emptiness of space, enlarging themselves ever larger to spread out the heat of the reactor.

“Degree check… positive. Heat check… positive. Form check… positive. Energy check… positive. I’m launching us away in five seconds. Get ready.” The nano-chatte said. I took a deep breath, and readied myself the best I could.

In one fraction of a fraction of a second, I could feel myself being pulled apart by reality, but then my gravity pulled me back together as each bit of me became infinitely heavy. The moment soon passed, and I stopped right on top of the base. Wait, that wasn’t right, we were supposed to crash through the roof.

“Ohohoho! Such irritating theatrics nano-chatte. You had to have known the General would’ve given us -the only resistance to the magic order on earth- the big toys.” A woman dressed in a grey and cyan elegant suit clapped slowly. Her grin shined brightly, blinding me. Wait, that wasn’t right again, everything is going white. No, everything was going static.

“We’re screwed primitive. I gambled on them not having controlled smart matter magnets, but they do, so we’re screwed.” What? No! I couldn’t just accept this. My cat, whether dead or alive, deserved justice. Whatever technology the nano-chatte was talking about could be overcome.

“How do we disable it?” The nano-chatte groaned.

“Why are you so damn persistent? We can’t. The magnet is like an E.M.P for nano-machines.” Oh… No matter! I just had to think harder.

“Change the nano-machines into something physical. Like whatever armour our partner was using.” The nano-chatte didn’t change its feelings. I still felt the monotone fear in its thoughts.

“I. Can’t. Move. Them. If I shut them off completely, you’d shed the suit and be gunned down.” That just meant I had to do it myself. I imbued my suit with electricity to turn it back on, but it got shut off immediately. My skin would char and be mended back in microseconds, and all that I would be left with is the pain of the shock.

“I’ll turn it on over and over while you try to make the suit into a faraday cage.” The nano-chatte didn’t respond or do anything even as I reactivated the suit again and again.

“It’s no use. No faraday cage works when that thing is on.” I could see glimpses of the machine when I reactivated my suit. It was a floating circle orbited by floating half-rings. I could also see something else. I was shaking incredibly fast. It must’ve been all the leftover kinetic energy trying to escape.

“I have a plan. I’ll probably pass out, so you’ll have to regenerate me after you do your part. We’re launching the suit at the machine. The kinetic energy should vaporise the machine with a single touch.” I could feel the tiniest bit of hope rising from the nano-chatte, but the armour remained as rigid as ever.

“You will die.” I won’t. I had to believe I would not die.

“That’s a risk worth taking. Ready?” The nano-chatte’s fear and tiny bit of hope gave way to hopelessness.

“Ready.” It wasn’t an excited confirmation, but any confirmation was enough for me. I electrocuted the suit again, seering myself. There was no suit to regenerate me this time, so I endured the pain. The sound of gunfire rang through the air as my body started being peppered with bullets. I was only conscious for one more second, and then I died.

I was in a dark void. In front of me was a woman with a brush, painting onto empty space, but that empty space being coloured anyway. Beings of pure paint popped out of the ground to shave the empty void away and release the giant, overly colourful field so it could shine its beauty into my eyes.

“Sit down. We have precious few seconds.” A seat appeared in front of me, and I sat down.

“Who are you?” The woman turned around, starting to paint me.

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“The Painter. I paint.” Such a… descriptive description.

“Anything more detailed than that, Miss cryptic?” She chuckled a little, then painted my nose red.

“Aw, calling me ‘miss’? I’m honoured. I am one of the ten chosen by the goddess. Or a chosen for short. I know my brush doesn’t seem powerful, but I can rewrite reality with it. Check this out.” The Painter tapped the green grass with her brush twice, and the entire field turned white. She then rotated her brush counter clockwise and gravity reversed.

“Cool, but why am I here?” She rolled her eyes and painted a heart on me.

“Because you chose to die for something greater. Although it won’t be for long, so it can’t truly be considered selfless. I like taking souls I think are neat and talking to them, but we don’t have any time left. I’ll be sure to grab your soul again if I see it.” It wasn’t a gradual process. One moment I was there, and then–

–I was back.

“You brat! How dare you! That cost us the entire andromeda galaxy.” The lady in the grey dress was staring at me as the suit turned my reactor back on.

“You’re back. I incapacitated all the soldiers while you were gone. This is our chance.” It was true. All the soldiers I could see were laying flat on the ground, with only the lady standing. I walked up to her too fast to be observed. She blinked, and I was in front of her.

“Oh? What’s your plan now big guy-” I grabbed her by the hair, and raised her up to my level. She was entirely silent. She didn't as much as twitch a muscle.

“We’re instituting a coup. We would appreciate your compliance, however unneeded it is.” She laughed at my request, and then rolled her eyes when she managed to settle down.

“You’d have to kill everyone if you kill me. There would be no point in ruling over a dead organisation, and I won't cooperate no matter what you do.” It really looked like convincing her wouldn’t be an option. She looked way too headstrong and stubborn to actually yield.

“Plan B.” I said as the nano-chatte immediately released some sort of device. It travelled up my arm, down her hair, and through her head? It just teleported through. I could smell something burn, and then the lady looked at me, eyes out wide.

“What is this? He didn’t warn us about whatever this is! You’re supposed to be-” Her eyes spasmed for a second, and then her pupils fell down. Her body turned cold incredibly fast, but the device inside her electrocuted her, and it rose again as I let go of her.

“It’s done. The fancily dressed primitive is under our control.” She got back up, and her eyes neither shined nor reflected any emotion towards me. There was a helicopter coming over the horizon, presumably with my partner in it. They’d know I’m not to be trusted, so controlling the leader in the shadows is my only move that doesn’t put me in danger again.

“Alright, now that this place is semi-safe, we’re going away.” I said as I felt the nano-chatte’s emotion shift immediately. The smooth, almost self assured confidence was replaced by its usual fear.

“Primitive… we can just blow up the helicopter.” I rolled my eyes, and launched off into the clouds before the people in the helicopter could see us. My size, if the radar was not adjusted for manually, would leave me undetected by the radar. It would only transmit information about things that were the size of airplanes. I, however chubby I might've been, was not the size of an airplane.

“Look. We did it, the organisation isn’t after us anymore. We can go here any time we’re in danger. We still need to beat the chosen, and we need to level up if we wanna do that. I say we go after the biggest pillar of light with the most enemies, and just grind it until we’re ready.” The nano-chatte was screaming internally, as its fear was replaced with desperation, then malevolence, and finally acceptance.

“You might be the biggest, most torturous moron I could’ve been assigned to. Why must you be so damn willful? Can’t an easy, simple life commanding the only group that won’t instantly kill you be enough? Of course it won’t. You still have hope that your feline companion is alive. Fine. Do it your way. Try to kill the strongest group in the multiverse with a couple months worth of training.” I cracked my finger and blasted off to god knows where. All I knew is that it was time for some slaying.