As the crowd quieted down, the king’s voice boomed to the high ceilings of the throne room. “Everyone, I’ve just been told some very important information!”

Important information? Hopefully it would be something that pointed away from Suza. Her mask was still intact, but now that she was under a guillotine next to Jaim, things didn’t look so good. They could have at least let the kid free. He had the tape over his mouth again.

“It may surprise some of you to know this,” the king continued. “But my daughter accompanied Mr. Allard in his investigation of the scene.” He couldn’t keep himself from smiling. “I’m pleased to let you all know that her help was indispensable to Mr. Allard’s efforts!”

The crowd cheered, bursting into applause. Yaika glanced back and forth, waving her hand like she was on a parade float going by. The king scrunched up his face and sent a passionate thumbs up in my direction. What the fuck was wrong with these people?

“With the princess behind us, we can’t lose!” Violetta’s voice came from beside me. I was surrounded by them. I had to get out of this place as soon as possible.

“Now let the trial continue!” the king yelled.

Lyili lifted her deceptively slender wrist into the air, and the crowd settled down. “Thank you for your assistance,

Princess,” she said, apparently sincere. I had a hard time believing she actually had any respect for these royal idiots, but demon culture was… uh, different. “I’m sure Sir Allard is very thankful for your assistance.” Oh, come on.

Everyone’s eyes were on me now, especially the purple haired princess’s. The black holes in her head burned into me like I had accidently looked directly at an eclipse.

“Thanks, princess,” I said. Yeah, not my proudest moment.

“Excellent.” The king settled into his throne. “Now, let’s have Brad catch us up on everything that you discovered… where’s Brad?”

“Brad is currently on an assignment related to this trial,” Lyili said. Fuck, how did she already know about that? She whipped her hair over her shoulder in pro-diva fashion. “I will give the details of the investigation in his place.”

The king grunted. “Oh yes. Of course. The… assignment. I’m glad to hear he’s… on that.” Ouch, left out of the loop again.

Lyili stood staring at me for a moment. “You don’t object?”

“No, I don’t,” I sighed. “Can you just get on with it?”

“S-Such insolence…” Lyili’s cheeks flushed. “F-Fine… Listen well, because by the time the trial is finished, there will be no doubt regarding who’s guilty.”

“Oh no, that doesn’t sound good,” Violetta whispered. What happened to ‘we can’t lose’? In fact, Lyili’s statement didn’t even imply that we would.

Lyili took a few steps around her table to the middle of the room. “Sir Prowteg was killed sometime between 8 and 9 last night.”

“Last night?” the king asked. “If I remember correctly, the Janitor’s had a game this morning, didn’t they? Why was he not reported missing, Mr. Coach?”

Coach was sitting near the front of the crowd, and he jumped as he heard his name. Yeah, not suspicious at all. “Well, ya see, I thought it was the nerves,” he said, mulling his claws around in his lap. “I was so concerned with fixin’ the line up, I didn’t have time to think about that.”

“Hold on a second,” I said. “What time did you discover your safe was missing?”

Coach glared at me with his beady bird eyes. “This morning when the players came to warm up before the game started.”

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“Interesting.” It was time to start hitting, and I intending to do it hard. “So you found your safe missing. Your safe containing something worth five hundred centipedes…”

“Five thousand,” Violetta whispered.

“Uhh… Five thousand centipedes. Whatever.” Ugh. “The point is, when Prowteg didn’t show, most would assume that he was the thief, wouldn’t they? Why didn’t you?” The crowd started to stir.

“Mr. Allard makes a compelling argument, Mr. Coach,” the king’s voice was stern. Fuck yeah, I did.

Coach wiped the sweat off his feathered brow. “Well… I… I just didn’t have time to think about that.”

“Sir Allard, I’ll remind you that today was a very important day for the Janitors,” Lyili said. “If they had won this morning’s game, they would have taken the World Series. It’s only natural for Sir Coach to have other things on his mind.”

“T-That’s right,” Coach stammered. “Exactly what she said.” Damn it, she was good.

“Now if I can continue…” Lyili smiled. “I enlisted one of my vampire underlings to examine the stadium to determine the scene of the murder.”

“Uhh… you can do that?”

“Oh! Vampires can smell blood, even if it’s been wiped away,” Violetta said, way more excited than she should have been. “I think that’s what she’s talking about.”

What the fuck? Why was the execution squad more equipped to examine crime scenes than mine was? Where could I trade in my assistant for one that sucked less? Well… if they were a vampire, I suppose they’d suck too.

“My underling found traces of blood just outside of the storage room,” she said. “I believe it’s very likely the killing took place there, and it was most likely carried out with a bocce ball that was later disposed of in the pond.”

Violetta grabbed onto my arm. “Oh no! My theory!” Yeah, I guess Prowteg hadn’t caught the killer trying to open up the safe after all. Back to square one as usual.

Lyili continued. “As for Sir Prowteg’s body, it was discovered in the stadium’s pond. His murderer tied him to the stolen safe, sinking him.”

“I suppose the killer would no longer need the safe if they removed its contents.” The king nodded to himself. “Have the guards opened it yet?”

“I’m afraid not, your majesty,” Lyili said. “The safe requires both a key and a three digit code. It’s quite hard to get into without them.”

“A key… and a code.” The king put his hand on his chin.

I slammed my hand down. “Let me guess. Coach Coach won’t give them to you.”

“Don’t be mistaken, Sir Allard. We don’t need either of these things from Sir Coach.” Lyili crossed her arms, a smirk forming on her face. “You see, at the bottom of the pond, I discovered something very interesting. Something that points to the safe having been opened... The key.”

I narrowed my eyes. “You found the key?

“Now hold on a minute!” Coach rocketed out of his seat. “T-That doesn’t make any sense!” He jammed his claw into his pocket and pulled out a small silver object. “I have the only key right here!”

“Very interesting. I think you’ll be surprised to find that there are two.” Lyili motioned to Mel over by the guillotines. Mel held up a similarly silver object in response.

“That’s… impossible…” Coach’s legs gave out on him, and he fell back into his chair. Now I understood why Lyili was so calm compared to how she was earlier.

“It’s only a matter of time before my men figure out of combination,” Lyili continued. Mel passed the key on to a horned man that quickly hurried out of the room. “Then we’ll see what all the fuss is about.”

“Your majesty,” I yelled. “I think it’s clear that coach Coach is hiding something very important about this case from us. I demand he be held contempt of court!”

“Yeah, contempt of court!” Violetta echoed before turning to me. “What is that?”

“It means he’s actively interfering with us finding the truth.” I was pretty sure that’s what it meant. “I’m calling for him to be punished immediately.”

Coach didn’t respond, avoiding eye contact with me. The king assumed his ‘thinking’ pose. Come on, he could at least try and scare him a little. Why were they being conservative with their guillotines all of a sudden?

Lyili closed the gap between her and my table. My eyes stayed firmly directed at her face, of course. “Are you accusing Sir Coach of the murder?” She had mischief in her eyes.

“I-I might be.”

“So he sunk his own safe? The safe he clearly didn’t want anyone to know about in the first place?”

Yeah, okay. So maybe Coach doing it didn’t make any sense. “I… guess not.”

Lyili straightened back up. “Good, Sir Allard. I’m happy to see you aren’t that foolish.” With another smile, she moved back to the center. God damn it. “Your majesty, I assure you, I will have that safe open before the trial is through. There’s no need to make this more complicated than it has to be.”

“Trials are complicated,” I mumbled.

“Now, as I promised,” Lyili put her hand out toward the guillotines. “During this trial, I will show how our pair of thieves committed his horrible crime.”

“Pair?” I asked.

“That’s correct. You see, Sir Allard, while neither of them were seen coming in through the front entrance, there is another way,” Lyili said. “There is a ventilation system accessible from the outside. One that is so small, that only a child could have fit inside.” The crowd gasped.

Well, apparently Suza’s outburst was for nothing. My work was pretty clear-cut. I just had to figure out literally everything that happened last night. Ugh.