Jellybean ambled his way up the doggy stairs into the van. They were heading off to William’s soccer game. The family had tried to leave him at the house, but he had whimpered his way into the group. While Sarah was usually willing to leave him when the kids were involved, Martin was a sap and he could always whimper his way back into Martin’s good graces. When they started to leave without him with the typical cries of, “Time for a nap, Bean!” he simply began pawing at Martin as always. A few short minutes later his leash was attached and off they went.
Martin was driving as always. Jellybean’s preference was to be as close to Martin as possible so he really wished Martin would just accept his station and ride in the passenger seat, but he insisted on attempting to lead their pack despite Sarah being the obvious Alpha. Martin emitted the most potent emotional energy of all of the family members, even more than Lily, their ten year old daughter. As long as he maintained proximity to Martin he could feel the emotional energy accumulate inside him. Many Dogs were willing to let their humans wander off frequently, but Jellybean had greater plans that required increased efficiency, and made sure Martin was near him as often as possible.
Jellybean assumed Martin’s constant emission of emotional energy was due to his inability to subjugate his mate, Sarah. Like many Humans, Martin was only capable of sustaining intimacy with one female at a time. Were he of Jellybean’s Clan on the Seventh Plain he would’ve been expelled for weakness, but this was Earth and thus Jellybean was forced to tolerate his feeble nature. In contrast, Sarah Jenkins was highly capable but emitted limited emotional energy. Were this the Seven Plains, he would’ve given a mate such as Sarah a suitable station and kept her pregnant until she could no longer bear pups. As it was, he had other uses for her. Sarah was the one who typically fed him, cleaned his scat, and washed his fur when he was dirty. Her one flaw was her urge to take him to a yearly appointment at the Veterinarian. While he was fine with medical care, they had twice cleared his anal glands of the necessary emotional energy he needed to sustain his war against the Labradors on the Seventh Plain. Subsequently, Jellybean had been forced to nip them whenever they attempted to ruin his plans. While nipping humans was generally risky and could damage the relationship between parasite and host, he couldn’t risk them ruining his careful laid plans.
Sarah attempted to tie his leash to the seat, but another small amount of whimpering left him firmly in Martin’s lap. Martin was a coward, afraid to challenge his wife’s authority on most matters, but he drew courage whenever Jellybean was involved. Jellybean took pride in this, and hoped that one day Martin might come to understand the rightness of Jellybean’s ways. Martin was physically larger than Sarah, but failed to ever use this to his advantage in their relationship, yet another sign of weakness.
“I want to hold Bean though!” Lily screamed.
Sarah glared at her husband, “See Martin, you are setting a bad example. It’s not safe for Bean to sit in your lap, honey!”
“Then why does Daddy get him?!”
Martin looked over smugly, “Sarah, he’s 20 years old. What’s the worst that could happen?”
It was true, Jellybean’s careful planning and excellent genetics had left him long-lived beyond even his most optimistic projections. This was his third Pupation. The previous two he had wound up with Hosts that were minimally empathetic. He had made little progress in his quest for dominance of the Seven Plains. He had been soundly defeated before even making it onto the battlefields the first time, and barely cleared one hundred kills before he was finally sent to Earth. Pupation was selected based on skill on the battlefield, so he considered it a boon when someone had selected him for Earth, one of the preferred destinations due to the meager and docile nature of the inhabitants.
He was thankful to be born into a puppy mill that produced Pureblood Dogs. Many Souls who went to Earth were forced to inhabit the body of half breeds and lesser creatures. Jellybean prided himself on the fact his bloodline remained pure West Highland Terrier. The Jenkins had purchased him when he was but 7 weeks into his Pupation, long before the arrival of their children and before Martin got busy with work. They were an ideal home, a wealthy young couple who could spend time and money on him. While Sarah never really delivered the emotional energy he craved, Martin was a classical “Dog Person.” While on Earth, this phrase simply meant that he enjoyed the company of Dogs, on The Seven Plains, this was akin to finding a diamond mine sitting on top of natural gas and oil. He was the proverbial “jackpot.” An endless font of emotional energy that could not possibly perceive it was being used, or even drained dry.
Martin started to pick up Jellybean and put him in the seat behind the driver’s seat in the large van they took to soccer practice, but Jellybean whimpered and scratched at Martin’s leg. “Ahh, Sarah, look, he doesn’t want to go. How can you say no to a face like that?”
“Fine. Just keep him. It’s on you if you get into an accident and he gets hurt.”
“You know you used to lay your head in my lap too?” Martin winked.
“And I wouldn’t count on that happening again any time soon.”
“What does what Dad said mean, Mom?”
“Nothing Lily-dear, your father was being silly,”
Martin leaned back and winked at his daughter, “It means a long time ago your Mom was pretty cool.”
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“Well now, I’m old and tired and you have more hair on your back than your head and there are two kids in the backseat so maybe we talk about something a little more family friendly, ok? Here let’s see what is on the radio.” Sarah flipped on the radio.
Jellybean laid his head down and went to sleep. He needed to conserve his energy. He buried his little muzzle into Martin’s knee and relaxed his tiny body til he fell asleep.
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The human game “Soccer” was a major point of interest for the Jenkins family. Lily and William played on separate teams, and thus the Jenkins were constantly driving to and from the soccer pitch. Jellybean found the game infuriating. The point was to place a ball in a basket, a fool’s errand. At any point that combat began, a man dressed as chattel would blow a whistle and force the action to stop, further reinforcing the futility of the game. There seemed no point in teaching children the basics of angles so that they could become adequate warriors if it was done in a way that prevented any actual combat.
Jellybean watched as William kicked the ball down the field. Were he himself playing, he would simply ignore the ball and eviscerate his enemies. Then he could easily place the ball in the net as many times as needed to be declared victor. Instead, he watched as William kicked the ball to another boy who then kicked it wildly into the field behind them. Jellybean whimpered in disgust. William would routinely to defer to a larger child named Skyler. This deference made no sense. Jellybean never understood human social dynamics. William himself was the superior player, but because of Skyler’s social standing, it was deemed he should take additional shots at the goal.
“You okay buddy?” Martin asked.
Sarah scratched Jellybean on his head. “He’s fine. He’s probably just whining because William passed it instead of taking the shot. I’ve told him time and time again if he wants to make Varsity he has to kick it.”
“Skyler’s his friend and the coach’s son. If he doesn’t pass it, he won’t get play time.”
“If he scores it, then Skyler’s prick of a Dad will have to play him.”
Martin glared at Sarah, a rare attempt at dominance. “Language honey.”
Sarah scoffed, “Balls, honey.”
Martin’s immediate emasculation by his mate lead to an outpouring of emotional energy. Jellybean soaked it up like a sponge. He leaned up against Martin’s leg and nuzzled him. “Good boy, Bean. Good boy.”
He was indeed a Good Boy. He was Martin’s Good Boy.
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Jellybean awoke in Martin’s lap when he began to rise. The game was finally over and it was time to head home. Jellybean usually slept through this part, preferring Martin to simply carry him to the car and place him back in his lap. He had been to last few soccer games and hadn’t yet found a reason to remain awake for them. Today was different. Lily was squealing particularly loud.
“Lily, do you want to do the kid’s contest?”
“Yes! Yes!!”
“Put your shoes on.”
“Ah mom, I don’t want to play against Lily.”
“You just know we’ll win!”
“Yea, cause there are like 50 of you and only two of us!”
“William, it’s not a contest. It’s just so the little ones get to go out on the big field and play. Go have fun with your sister.”
“She’s a brat! If she gets the ball I’m tackling her.”
“Mom, William said he’s going to tackle me.”
“Martin, do you have anything to say to your son.”
“William, don’t tackle your sister.”
“That’s it?”
“Lily, don’t antagonize your brother.”
The argument continued like this for another three minutes or so as Sarah would yell at Martin, Martin would yell at William, William would yell at Lily, and then Lily would yell at Sarah. Jellybean had seen this dozens of times. It was the result of weak leadership and poor structure. On the Seven Plains, these arguments didn’t occur. William would simply challenge Martin’s authority and either kill or be killed. More likely still, Sarah would’ve taken another mate and eaten Martin a long time ago. Regardless, he was again happy that he wasn’t human.
The incessant nagging prevented him from falling back asleep though, so he lazily watched the results of the argument. Both Lily and William took the field, but this time, William and Skyler were the only players on their team, and on the opposite side, there were several dozen children of approximately Lily’s age. The chattel colored man threw the ball on the field and everyone began running chaotically. William and Skyler were initially successful at driving the ball up the field, but when they attempted to shoot, several children stood in the way. No matter how they attacked the objective, eventually the ball would bounce off some child. Without enforcement of the rules, it would be impossible for William and Skyler to win. After several missed attempts, the smaller children finally rounded up the ball. Despite losing it frequently, eventually, the children’s numbers overwhelmed the two superior players and they scored. When William and Sklyer received the ball, there was simply too many bodies in the way for them to make it to the goal and the children scored again. This happened multiple times, with each event being marked by cheering from the parents. A dejected and sad Jellybean barked at Williams, commanding him to cut through the enemy ranks with vicious intent. He tried to explain that William simply needed to cut the other children’s throats and then throw them to the side, leaving their corpses for the ravens. Cleanse the battlefield and then he could again reign as Champion.
Sarah Jenkins grabbed his mouth, another thing he hated. “No barking buddy.”
No barking. A ridiculous sentiment. He was not barking. He was instructing. No one seemed to understand field combat on this planet. Some day, far in the future, he would return to Earth and muzzle this woman himself or whatever ancestors he could find.
He watched as the children overcame the superior strength of William and Skyler. After a few minutes of play the children had scored many goals, whereas William and Skyler remained without a single point. Worse yet, not a drop of blood had been spilled by either side, confirming their inability to put petty emotional attachments aside and dominate the competition. William and Skyler had been defeated by a larger force made of massively inferior creatures. It was sickening, but fortunately, everyone left the field ending the charade. Martin picked up Jellybean and set him on the ground. He wriggled his fur. While he preferred to be carried, occasionally, he did like to stretch his legs. He followed Martin to the field to greet the children.
“Good boy ‘Bean. Good boy.”
As Martin and Jellybean waited for the Lily and William to gather their belongings and leave the field, Jellybean pondered the situation. With his anal glands nearly bursting, Pupation was almost over. Much of his day was spent planning his ascension. Human soccer was a poor combat simulator, but perhaps there were lessons to be learned here after all.