Dear Journal,

A miracle of all miracles happened! My mom actually agreed to let us all visit the power plant! She’s definitely not dead set on us going there to stay or anything, but the night after Ben got back, she and Ben went back into the kitchen and chatted for so long that I thought maybe they had fallen asleep back there, but when they came out, my mom said sure, we can at least go and check it out. I was so excited, because I was sure that my mom was going to say absolutely not, there was no way we were ever going to visit! I guess adults can still surprise you sometimes after all.

So the next morning, most of us headed out to go visit Rex and his group. Mr. Williams and Hattie stayed behind, of course - they agreed with what I had originally been thinking, that they might be able to make the trip one time if they were lucky, but they sure as hell weren’t going to be going back and forth multiple times. So, my mom decided that they would stay behind and guard the coffee shop, which seemed ridiculous to me because 1) it’s not like anyone’s going to try to break into a coffee shop - nobody even really tried to break into the coffee shop before the bombs dropped! And 2) there’s no one around to guard the coffee shop from anyway. But I guess it made her feel safer or something, so whatever. She gave Mr. Williams a bunch of the weapons that she’d been collecting during the last few weeks, although most of them weren’t actually weapons so much as like 2x4s that hadn’t completely burned in the fires. But it’s not like Mr. Williams would really be able to fight anyone off regardless of what sort of weapons he was given. He’d gotten pretty much all the way better after we gave him the medicine, but he still was super old. And Hattie would be of no help - I don’t think she could kill a fly even if she tried!

But either way, with the two of them “guarding” the coffee shop, the rest of us headed off. Even though my mom had started letting Jared and I go out into the world by ourselves again, there was something that felt different about walking through the burned remains of the world with the whole group, and definitely something different about having an actual destination. We hadn’t had a destination since we went to go look for medicine for Mr. Williams, and even then it was just a vague idea of where to go. Downtown is big enough that it was pretty easy to find, even if you didn’t really have any landmarks or anything to go on (which, frankly, I’m surprised that I haven’t ever seen a street sign that’s survived. Even if they were pushed down in the blast, they’re made of metal, so they should have been fine?? I guess it’s one of the many weird quirks of the fire), you were able to find it pretty easily. But going to the power plant, I was trying so hard to memorize the route because if they would even just let me come there for a bit to take a shower, I wanted to be able to find my way back so I could make the trip like at least once a week. But it was basically impossible to find anything to really mark the way! Which I guess makes sense - if my mom’s that paranoid about someone finding the coffee shop, it makes sense that they would be paranoid about someone finding the power plant. I’d be just about willing to fight them for it if Rex wasn’t so super huge.

This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere.

When it started to get toward dusk, though, my mom made us all stop for the night, which for once, I agree with her, because the farther we got away from the roads that Jared and I had cleared in the early days, the more debris and old corpses that littered the road. It was hard enough just finding a spot that was clear enough for us to sleep in! It made me kind of wonder why all these people had been here when the bombs dropped - it wasn’t like it was a big shopping center or something, and it wasn’t near a school as far as I know. Maybe it was by some big corporate building or something, who knows.

Eventually, we gave up trying to find an already clear spot, and we all started just clearing a spot on the side of the road that seemed more clear than the rest. We all (except for Bryce, who said that she couldn’t possibly stomach it) had to clear out a skeleton or two, but at this point, they’d been sitting out in the elements for long enough that they don’t really seem that gross anymore. Plus, a lot of them had been sterilized by the fire, so it was kind of just like moving weirdly shaped rocks. Although I still kind of wished that we had brought the shovel so I wouldn’t have had to touch them. Or I wished that we were by a building with running water so I could at least rub the bone dirt off my hands.

But with any luck, I’ll be able to do that tomorrow! Ben said it wasn’t that much farther to the power plant, and I can totally believe that because even though we’re not right by the river, I can kind of hear river sounds if I focus hard enough. So I can get in, say hi to Hansen, and then take what will probably be the best shower of my life! Or maybe I’ll reverse those two - Hansen has already seen me disgusting, but he doesn’t need to see me that way again if everything works out. And I really hope it does, because if we go all this way just for my mom to freak out right before we get there and not let us actually go into the power plant, I’m probably going scream.

Speaking of, despite how upset she was at the general idea of us even wanting to go to the power plant in the first place, my mom seems super calm tonight. She’s still in what I’ve decided to call her war gear, laid out on a few coffee bags that are suspiciously close to Ben (I’m starting to suspect that Hattie might be right, which is honestly just super fucking gross. She’s a mom, she’s not supposed to be sneaking off to make out with people!), staring up at the sky. And I’ll admit, ever since the world ended, the view of the sky has been the best it ever has. There’s always been a few stars that we could see from the city. But now, it looks like we can see everything in the galaxy, even with the light of the fire Ben started from old wood scraps we found. Even with everything around us, I think it gives her some sense of hope.

Here’s to hoping what tomorrow brings!

Love,

Kayla