“Good morning, Antioch!”
As the city began to come to life, Horan stood on top of a building and woke up the citizens. Once he was satisfied by the number of people outside, he glided down to street level and greeted the citizens. “It’s a beautiful…” He looked up at the grey, overcast sky. “It’s an above-par morning, and the first day of your lives spent in my presence! So let’s celebrate!”
He flew through the intersection, where the night’s celebration was still being prepared by a few workers. “Keep it up, guys, I want all this ready by tonight!”
Horan flew down to a foldable table near his quarters and sat down. Mark blearily walked over to the table and examined it. “What exactly is this?”
“I couldn’t sleep, so I found this and set it up for the morning.” Horan raised his voice. “Come now, whoever wants to learn more about your beloved new immortal! I’m taking questions until I get bored.”
Mark rubbed his eyes. “Did you wake up the whole city so that they would interview you?”
“Well, I felt like I could act like a wake-up call every morning from now on, but basically, yeah.”
“Sounds wonderful.” Mark looked at the small crowd forming behind him. “So, what exactly am I supposed to do here?”
“Like I said, celebrate your new idol! I’m here for anyone to ask about my colourful past and charming demeanour.”
“Talking to you is the exact opposite of what I would do if I wanted to celebrate anything.”
“And that’s exactly why you don’t have any friends besides me.”
“You’re not my friend.”
Horan’s smile dropped slightly. “Wow, you really did wake up on the wrong side of the bed. Look, if you’re just going to be rude, step aside and let my devoted followers worship me in peace.”
“You should have thought of that before you woke me up… earlier than usual.”
“If you can’t tell what time it is, just assume that I woke you up perfectly on time.”
“My body says differently.”
“Just go away and let me cater to my audience.”
Mark placed his hands on the table and grinned. “But why would I do that when I have so many questions about the great Horan? Isn’t that why people are coming here?”
“You’re going to try and get me to humiliate myself in public, aren’t you?”
“Oh, absolutely.”
“Great. Alright, shoot.”
Mark leaned back. “Alright then. Tell me, Horan, didn’t you fight Thel before?”
“Yup, Thel and I fought for the throne of the Egyptian Domain of Primoi more or less right after we first manifested into existence.”
“And how’d that fight go, exactly?”
Horan looked behind Mark. A rapt audience had gathered behind him and were waiting for Horan to speak, some of whom were looking for seats. Horan stood on top of the table and cleared his throat. “Well, everyone, I suppose that’s the biggest question you could have asked. Fortunately for you all, I know the story like it was yesterday.”
Mark smirked and stood back. “This should be good.”
Horan glared briefly at Mark before stepping forward and beginning.
“Right after the Primoi of Egypt were created when civilization first arrived there, the whole group of Primoi were ruled by my uncle Ren. Eventually he abdicated, because… reasons, and gave the throne to my father Lamius. He ruled with his wife, Renan, and everything was great.
One day, my evil uncle Thel used a dark magical ritual to maim Lamius and cast him into the Down Below, this weird dimension where the souls of humans go when they die. With the Pharaoh trapped in another dimension, Thel took over as monarch. Renan fled the court with me as a baby. Me and my mom spent a few decades living among the humans of Egypt as I grew into an adult Primus. Lamius may have been too weak to leave the Down Below and take over as Pharaoh again, but I was still his son and heir. So when I was old enough to rule, I went back to the palace and challenged Thel for the throne.
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We spent a couple years trying to prove our dominance over each other in various ways. Armies were raised, sports were played, and I think we had a dance-off at one point? I forget the details, but either way, I came out on top, thanks to me being naturally wiser and more charismatic than Thel.”
The crowd burst into applause, some people whistling. Mark remained unimpressed, slightly confused that that was all it took to impress the locals. “Right, and what I’ve seen you do since is just as impressive as what you say you did.”
Horan deflated. “Hey, it’s been thousands of years! I’m just… sorta rusty, is all.”
“Hmph. Well then, why did Ren ste-“
“Sorry, one question per person!” Horan flicked his hand and a pillar of dust rose up from the ground in a gust of wind. The sand collapsed onto Mark’s face, blinding him and making him stagger away spluttering. Mark was followed by the crowd’s laughter as he stormed off.
-
Mark sat on top of an abandoned building, looking up at the sunless sky. He could dimly hear Horan loudly boasting below him, but the words were indistinct. Throwing and catching a piece of chipped concrete, Mark wondered about how things would go if they stayed here. Food from farms on the outskirts of the city and scavenged from the ruins meant he didn’t need to worry about day-to-day survival, but the whole situation had an air of… non-permanence.
They hadn’t even been living here for a full day, but Mark still felt like his and Horan’s time living in luxury was coming to a close. Horan was clearly starting to run out of novel Primus things to do to impress his followers, and Mark didn’t even speak the native language. And could Horan really deal with a proper invasion from Thel’s forces? He was clearly flourishing with all the worship, but all the power in the world couldn’t treat overall incompetence. And Thel could probably handle a few barricades and the odd sniper, based on what Mark had seen in Cairo.
Overall, Mark didn’t want to leave all this behind, but he felt like it might just be necessary. Maybe leaving would be for the best, it would help shrink Horan’s massively inflated ego.
“Not much to look at, eh?” Mark was startled by a voice behind him. He leapt to his feet to see a man with a sniper rifle slung on his back climbing up to the building roof. The man held up his hands. “Whoa now, no need to panic. You just found my thinking spot.”
Mark sat back down. “Sorry, force of habit. Nice to see there’s somebody in the city I can actually talk to.”
“I can imagine the feeling.” The man sat down next to Mark.
“Yup. City’s nice, but I wish I could have someone come with me 24/7 and translate for me. That’s a rich person thing, right?”
“I don’t know, I’m not rich.” The man leaned back. “Name’s Mehmet, sniper guard for Antakya. I’m the person who took out those demons yesterday. You’re the person Horan came with, right?”
“That’s me.” Mark chucked his piece of concrete over the edge. “You folks really took to him fast, didn’t you? What I want to know is, why? I’ve been around him for a while, and the guy’s insufferable.”
“Well, he’s charming enough for you to have not gotten rid of him by now. That’s something.”
“Well, I wasn’t really keeping him around out of the kindness of my heart.” Mark looked over at Mehmet. “If I tell you something, do you promise not to tell the High Prophet I’m a heretic or anything?”
Mehmet shrugged. “Depends on what it is, but I probably won’t.”
“Alright.” Mark sighed. “Did you know that the guy’s blood is liquid gold?”
“Oh, cool.”
“Yeah, I know. So, my plan was to make him get rid of Thel for me and make sure the world wouldn’t get destroyed or anything, and then sell him to someone and live a life of luxury. He does make infinite gold, after all.”
“…Huh. But who would you sell him to? Gold is worthless these days.”
“Yeah, I kinda figured that out from the start, I’ve just been in denial about this. I figure I’ll just… hold on to him, travel the world until I find some rich schmoe who’ll take him from my hands. It’s a stupid plan, I know, but I just don’t want to pass up this chance… I don’t even know if I’m gonna go through with it at this point, to be honest.”
“Interesting. So, does he know about your plan, or are you just keeping him in the dark about it?”
“Nah, he knows. I’ve got him stuck to me since he signed a slavery contract which he can’t break because he’s a being of pure order or whatever.”
“That’s a unique way of keeping him with you.” Mehmet got up. “Well, thanks for talking to me about it. I can see you needed to get all that off your chest. If you ever want to talk about stuff, you can come to me. Call me your personal therapist.” He climbed back off the roof and left Mark alone.
Mark smiled quietly to himself, then facepalmed a second later. What was he thinking, spilling his guts to a stranger like that? He was supposed to be better than this. Mehmet, if that was even his real name, was probably some undercover marauder who planned to copy Mark’s idea and kidnap Horan for himself.
Mark leaned over and peered over the side of the building, but Mehmet was nowhere to be seen and Horan was still blathering on to the shrinking crowd. Mark sighed and leaned back. Was he just being paranoid again? The first person he talked to reasonably besides Horan in years and he assumed the guy was secretly a Primus-napper. He was going out of his mind.
Mark decided to get up and check on the ceremony preparations. It’d do him a world of good to relax for once. Everything was fine, he had nothing to worry about.
The voice in his head persisted as he walked down the streets, continuing to reassure him the whole way.