"Honestly, you can't really even expect anime characters to act more than vaguely smart." said some guy in his underpants sitting on a swivel chair to no one in particular.
on the screen of the desk that some guy in his underpants is sitting in front of, lays the paused image of one of the most popular anime of the season.
Its name was One Punch Man, but that is not what this story is about
What it is about, however, is said guy, in his underpants, unaware of the fact that the clothing he took off landed on the still-lit stove. Which soon caught fire, but because said guy took apart his smoke alarms to get some money, went unnoticed by that same guy. The flaming clothing, pants, fell onto the floor. The pants just so happened to land on the kitchen rug, which also soon caught fire. Further spreading the flames to the other article of loose clothing tossed aside in a hurry, which spread the fire to the carpeted living room floor. The guy, let us call him, sam, for now, still blissfully unaware that his death, was just around the corner.
"Stupid Fucking Octopus thing! don't you know that you can't beat the Caped Baldy?" another utterance from the unknowing sam, little did he know that these were a poor choice of last words.
The fire soon found its way to the stairway, in the end, sat the door to sam's room. As if it was sentient, the fire raced up the stairs in a straight line, burning down the door, and engulfing sam. His last thoughts were 'but I didn't get to finish'.
the moment sam was dead, the flames put themselves out, 13 hours later, the fire department would be astounded, at the fact, that there was a snaking line of burnt carpet, leading to sam's room. everything else untouched, and if you looked closely enough, you could even see the carpet repair itself over time.
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"Yo What The Fuck?!!?" yelled out the falsely named sam, as he plummeted through a technicolored hell by which the mind could only come up with if it was, 'tripping some mad balls'.
"What The Fuck Is Happening!!?" He yelled again, hoping in vain that his words would reach any entity that could rescue him from this nightmare.
His words did reach an entity, though their response wasn't what 'sam' was hoping for. as the entity waved their hand, more of the technicolored light, cyan and black being its main scheme, beamed its way to Sam, knocking him out as his body disintegrated, leaving behind a whisp of those same colors to float through space before the entity folded space around it, and knocked the whisp into a world of Wonder, Technology, Spac- wait, what do you mean he turned left?
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cold
everything was, cold
then it got warm, then cold again, then warm, then cold, then-
you know what? not important.
What is important, however, is...
"WHY THE FUCK AM I SKYDIVING WITHOUT A PARACHUTE?!?!?!??"... Yep, I'm falling to my death, somehow. Don't ask me why, all I know is that there was cold, then warm, then I felt wind, and here I was. Falling. Hey, at least it beat falling through the mind of a stoner. hold on a second, is that a fucKING FLYING CITY?!
[Connecting...]
"What the fuck?!" it wasn't a screen, it was a voice, as well as a feed of computer text in the lower left of my vision. I tried to move my hand in front of my face to poke it, but I couldn't move my arms. or legs. or anything really.
[Deactivating Motion Lock...]
and then I could move, it was really weird, like when your arm falls asleep completely and you cant move it, but then it comes back but you don't feel the pins and needles. So I moved my arm to see it.
it was metal.
like, robot terminator destroyer metal. but I had all of my fingers, and they were segmented, likely to give my fingers the flexibility to move.
[done!
welcome Head A.I. "unnamed", to your first Synthetic Imperial Mobile Protector, or SIMP Synth Unit,
Omega Builder Progeneter "unnamed", Model no. 1
I am your A.V.I. assistant, SAV, feel free to change my designation at your leisure.]