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Oh Arceus, I'm a Pokemon! Now What?
Ch. 9 - Petal For Your Thoughts

Ch. 9 - Petal For Your Thoughts

It turned out that we could not ‘do this thing’. Not at least that day. It left Ed kicking his heels in something of a funk and Becca apologizing profusely. She’d not had to wait, for whatever reason. He’d psyched himself up to battling Roxanne that day and instead was going to have to postpone it until the day after next. Being a gym leader in Rustboro was a full time occupation, and as it happened, there were enough people who wanted a challenge that there was a waiting list this week, although not a horribly long one. She generally had up to four grading bouts a day, but unless pushed would rather make that two or three, with a chance to do some coaching in between. That all changed during League trials, but we weren't there yet.

Like all gym leaders, she wasn’t just a hardass on the battlefield, she knew her stuff when it came to pokémon nutrition, health, behaviour and more, and was more than happy to make sure more trainers had a happy, healthy and fulfilling life with their pokémon partners. Even when in some cases she had to tell them that battling didn’t appear to be their forté and instead should move to some other pursuits, be it expressly pokémon related — researching, becoming a ranger, so on — or not.

As such, Ed and Becca now had a day and a half or so free — breakfasts, lunches and dinners notwithstanding — to get whatever else they wanted to do done, before once again hitting up Roxanne for their date with destiny.

Seeing as they had the rest of the afternoon free, Becca suggested visiting the Pretty Petal Flower Shop near route 104. Maybe Ed would pick up that Rock-smasher grass or water type whilst they were there.

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"So," I began as we made our way out of town back towards the eponymous Route 104, "do you want to talk about... Ziggy?" I asked, nudging Barb. "I’ve been watching you two."

She regarded me silently for a moment. "What do you mean? Last I heard, you were playing hard to get. You can’t be that delcatty just because he and I get on," she retorted with a smirk.

"No, no, I’m just... he’s a nice guy, but not my type."

"Uh huh. I heard enough of that sort of thing back in the office. If you want him, you tell him straight, you don’t spend the next however long—" Barb started, as we walked through the city. Buildings were starting to thin, to be replaced with greenery and standalone houses.

I choked, shaking my head. "No, really, no. I just... you like him? Don’t... don’t lead him on."

Barb chuckled. "How old were you again?"

"Umm... I’m not... not sure." I looked down at the ground, unable to meet Barb’s gaze as she silently evaluated me.

"I’ll guess you’re young enough to be... well you’ve probably had the talk about the pidgeys and the combees, but I don’t think you’re much older than that... uh huh, called it." She laughed again as I blushed. "What’s this about?"

"I... I really don’t know," I replied to her. "He just seemed to like me, and now he likes you and... I don’t want to see him hurt."

"Oof, the poor guy was friendzoned and didn’t even know it," Barb said, visibly wincing. She shook her head. "Well don’t worry, sister. If we break it off, either because we break things off naturally or because all this gets sorted out," Barb waved her horn around to indicate herself and myself, "I promise I’ll let him down gently. Truth is though, the machine you totalled? The only way I’m going to become human again is through some sort of miracle, because not only does that machine only go one way and this is it, but you’d need a sample of my genetic code, and that all went up in smoke when you fried the system. I’m stuck like this, at least as much as you are if not more so. I still don’t know how you happened."

I stumbled, distraught. The tips of my ears burned with shame as I hastened to apologize, breath coming fast and in rapid gulps. Barb cut me off before I passed out from hyperventilating.

"No, no, you were quite right yesterday in the spa. You did what you thought was best, and besides!" Barb shoved me, then pointed around at the scenery surrounding us; the trees, the sky, the air, the songs of the bug pokémon and bird pokémon. "Imagine how terrible it would have been to wait in that lab, day after day, year after year as a pokémon, alone, just sitting there, wasting away, missing all this? For a solution that might never come? No, I’d much rather be out here with a trainer, living a life full to the brim."

"I... guess?" I said.

"Trust me, I’ve sat in a lab for the past twenty something years. When you spoke to me in the spa, you made me realize I’d been given another choice, another chance at a new life. After that, I had a bit of a walk and a bit of a think. Ziggy just happened to come with me. Despite what you may think, he’s a real gentle... mon? Is that the word?"

I couldn’t help it, I giggled despite myself. "I guess it is," I said, nodding and flicking my tail playfully. By now, we were out of the city proper, following the signs towards Route 104 proper.

"Well, we got to talking as I got to thinking. You know he talked about you? Well, turns out he really likes you, but didn’t know how to crack your shell, as he put it. And then the poor thing blurted out how much he likes me. I said I wouldn’t play second fiddle to an unaware eevee, and he stated he’d never do that to a pokémon as beautiful as me. Can you believe it?"

"Umm," I said, thinking for a moment. "I don’t really know what beauty is. I think I’m too young. I don’t remember much from when I was human — of course I remember thinking girls were pretty — and now I’m an eevee, I’m... I don’t know how old, but it’s too young for this sort of nonsense. And that’s before the whole ‘being a girl’ thing."

"Such a flatterer," Barb said sardonically, chuckling to herself. She stopped to smell a flower for a moment. It was then that I noticed the fact that she had a little flower-crown on her head.

"You and Ziggy are quite alike, you know?" she continued. "Maybe you’re just more of a pokémon than I am, but he’s as straight as the day is long. When he called me beautiful... kid, I’m not young like you, or I wasn’t. I spent my life in a lab, not a place where you get a healthy tan — quite the opposite, in fact. I’ve never really thought of myself as beautiful. It’s why I told him that if he just thinks my horn is pretty I’ll stab him with it. Then the sap went on about my fur and my eyes, even my ears! And then... he said he admired me for what I’d spent my life doing. He didn’t hold it against me that I used to be a human, he thought it was amazing. So we spent the evening like that; I told him about what humans do, though I don’t think he understood half of it, and he made me this flower crown. He was ashamed that it was the best he could do, said he'd been planning to buy something for you before you set off all the alarms in the shopping mall, but he said he’d do his best to get better at everything to impress me!" Barb laughed as she inclined her head to show the flower crown to me. "What could I do but give him a chance?"

I walked quietly next to her for a moment longer, taking in the sunlight, the grass, the feel of the earth under my paws and the wind in my fur. "I don’t know, but I think you make a pretty good pokémon," I said finally. "If you think you can handle him, then I hope you two become happy."

"He’s rough around the edges, but so are you. You don’t get a beautiful brilliant diamond just by digging it out of the ground, you know, it needs polishing."

"Are you calling me a diamond in the rough?" I asked her, as we padded towards a shimmering blue lake next to fields of flowers.

"No, I’m calling you spiky, colourful and unyielding. Ziggy is a diamond in the rough. You're more like a shining pearl."

"Oh?"

"Yeah, formed through irritation."

"Gee, thanks."

"You’re welcome. Just one more thing?"

"Hmm?"

Barb lowered her horn and very gently tapped me with it. "Tag! You’re it. Alternatively," she said over her shoulder, as she scampered away at speed, "last one to the water’s a rotten exeggcute!"

"Oh you’re on!" I shouted, leaping after her. There were a series of audible pops as all of Ed’s and Becca’s pokémon exited their balls to come play with us, both teams stampeding down towards the lake edge.

I didn’t even flinch when we ran out of dock, I just leaped straight into the water, diving down for a swim. As an eevee, the cold water didn’t really bother me. Even yamper-paddling wasn’t very difficult, and I surfaced in a spray of water, which I spat heartily at Barb. She squealed in mock anger and returned the favour. Even Guy joined in; seeing him speed through the water near the bottom of the lake like a spherical torpedo was startling, especially to the lotad that scattered from his passing, but heartening. I saw he’d started to shed his earlier, entirely understandable, anger. In its place was forming... some new emotion. I wasn’t sure what, yet, but I was glad that the ghost pokémon was finding his place.

"Much like I have," I muttered to myself. I was still waiting for the other shoe to drop — even though I no longer wore shoes — when I saw a shady character hiding in the bushes. "Hey you!" I shouted, and leaped out of the water. I ran across the grass and tackled the human at a flat run, landing on his chest and growling at him. I was still growling when Ed snatched me up in his hands and held me to his chest, apologizing.

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"I’m sorry! I’m sorry! She’s a little... protective." Ed held Lux up close to his chest as the little eevee grumbled and growled at the red-headed kid in the bushes.

"Hey, no harm done! I’m a bit soggy, but my gear’s taken a few knocks in its time," the boy — man, really, after all the age of majority was ten — said, as he held out a hand to be helped up. "Name’s Sly, pleased — heh — to meet you."

"I’m Ed, this is Becca. I’ve got to ask," Ed asked, as he eyed the multiple cameras that Sly had around his neck, "what were you doing there? Lux probably thought you were some kind of stalker."

"Haha, I can see how she’d think that," replied Sly with an easy laugh. He ran a hand through his scarlet hair and blinked his equally scarlet eyes. He stood a good few inches taller than Ed and Becca, and was clearly a year or so older, but he was far from being a full adult. "I was crouching in the bushes snapping pictures, after all. Thing is, I wasn’t taking them of you guys, at least not deliberately. I was getting snaps of the wildlife here. You did seem to be having so much fun though... do you want to see?"

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"Sure! Hey Becca, come see these pictures!"

A little bit later at the Pretty Petal Flower Shop, several tables were taken over by not only a selection of food and drinks, but also a selection of flowers... and freshly minted postcards featuring shots taken by Sly, featuring multiple pokémon, some even belonging to Ed and Becca.

"Oh these are wonderful!" Rita, the eldest of the three sisters that ran the shop, stated. "Don’t you think so, Nicole?"

Nicole, the middle sister, nodded as she passed out slices to pie to everyone seated around the tables, including the pokémon, although they got their own pie which was more friendly to pokémon tummies. "They are wonderful indeed, you’re saying we can sell them?"

"Of course! I’ll be back at some point if you want to throw some of the profits my way," said Sly with a grin. "If you do a little P.R. for me and let me do some photoshoots in your glorious fields for any interested pokémon and their trainers, I’d be very grateful. We can also get some new shots for the next catalogue next time I come through!"

"Is that alright with you two and your pokémon?" Nicole turned to Ed and Becca. "We’ve had a few photographs done before for our little shop, but couldn’t really afford something like this!"

"You think we could make some money off these?" asked Becca, thumbing through a selection of the postcards.

"Well probably not that much," chuckled Nicole. "We’re not exactly a massive chain store like Devon! But if you’ll agree to the same deal as Sly, I’m pretty sure you’ll see a nice little bonus to your finances every month or so! Of course we sell more in summertime, like now, but even visitors in the winter like our teas, soaps and things."

"I’d like that!" piped up Ed. "Even if it’s from just a little of the profit; I wasn’t really expecting anything!"

"Nice to see somebody around here isn’t just on the take," grumbled Natalie, the youngest.

"Natalie! You take that back!" Rita was scandalized by her youngest sister. "I’m sorry, I apologize for her, she’s... prickly, like a salac berry, but she’s a sweetie really. Natalie, now!"

"I’m sorry," said Natalie, looking down. "There’s a lot of people come through here, some of them don’t treat our flowers so well, and we need them for what we do. Then you turn up and..." The rest of what Natalie said ended up as mumbles, but Rita rolled her eyes anyway.

"I don’t think these fine people had any ulterior motives, Natalie, and more to the point you’re insulting our business partners." Rita winked at Becca, who stifled a giggle.

"Look, if you think it’s too much trouble, then just forget about it. They’re great pictures, you can have them. If you change your mind though, you can always get hold of me over the phone." Sly fished around in his bag and brought out a large, oddly shaped mobile phone.

"Woah, what is that? I’ve never seen a phone like that!" said Ed. "I haven't seen many mobile phones as it is, I’ve only just got a dex!"

"Ah, this old thing?" Sly held up the large, red, roughly tear-drop shaped device and flipped the cover open, revealing a large screen and big, chunky buttons. It had a stubby little aerial emerging from the top. "It’s a bit of a special model; it’s got great reception even when I’m out in the middle of nowhere. When you’re a pokémon photographer, you need rugged devices more than you need sleek functionality. I should probably upgrade, but I’d lose a lot of what I like about this thing, starting with the replaceable batteries."

"You could... maybe you could get a rotom phone?" suggested Becca as she peered at the odd piece of kit.

"Yeah, well, maybe," Sly temporized. "They’re not the easiest things to get hold of when I’m out and about, but if I get the chance I wouldn’t say no, if the rotom wanted — I do know that's their kind of thing. On the other hand, I’d miss this old thing. It’s been everywhere with me. I was using it out in Unova, Kalos... Sinnoh even! I’ll always regret that I couldn’t make it to the inaugural Alolan League Championship, that was supposed to be one heck of a show when that Ash kid pulled out all the stops. I’ve even got a picture of a Lugia! You want to see?"

Ed’s ears perked up at that, along with plenty of their shared pokémon, many of them crowding around to see the picture of the legendary pokémon.

"She visits this one city every year, blessing it with the wind. I got a fantastic shot of Lugia as she flew overhead out to sea... here we are! Beautiful shot, isn't it? Beautiful creature, amazing."

"Woah!" the two trainers and three shop owners exclaimed, their cry echoed by all the other pokémon present. Sure enough, the gigantic blue and white flyer was making her way out to sea, framed by Fula City in the background, lit by the sacred flame.

"Woah indeed, it’s why I do what I do; try to get a glimpse of wild pokémon as they go about their lives — even when it’s a Legendary creature like Lugia, who blesses an entire city with their presence. But enough about Legendaries, you guys, tell me about yourselves! You two are obviously trainers, have you been at it long? That eevee, she’s yours, um, Becca?"

"Nuh uh, Ed caught her fair and square, up in the mountains on the other side of Route one-oh-four."

"Oh? That must’ve been quite the battle; Eevees are hard to catch, clever little things!" said Sly, snatching his fingers back as Lux bit at him, earning her another squirt from the squirtle bottle, wielded by Becca.

"Lux! Don’t you dare! I’m so so sorry!" Becca apologized.

"Oh, I don’t mind her, eevees are also very territorial. You know if you become good enough friends with one, they can evolve out of pure love for their partners? If you didn’t battle her, how did you win her trust?"

"Oh, I didn’t battle... umm, I used... it was a lucky catch, you know?"

"With a luxury ball, no less," said Sly, eyebrow raised. "You were one lucky kid in that case, they’re easy to lose."

"How did-" Ed started, jerking his gaze up from where he’d been watching Lux to the older teen next to them.

"Sorry, sorry," replied Sly, lifting his hands up in an ‘I surrender’ motion. "I’m a photographer, I see how things move, how they look. You touched her ball as you thought about it, it was obvious which one was hers."

"Well, yeah, you’re right. Funny story about that... ah, umm. It was a bit sad. We, er, almost..."

"Ed doesn’t really like to talk about it," said Becca, jumping in.

"Y-yeah, another time, maybe." Ed nodded, after a furiously intense glare from Becca.

Sly waved them off, taking another drink of the flower petal tea the three sisters had offered. "On a day like this, we should only remember the sad things that also bring us joy, right?"

"That’s... an odd way to put it," replied Becca, "but I think I know what you mean."

"Or we could swap fishing stories about the ones that got away," said Sly, nodding as some aquatic pokémon — it might have been a large magikarp, or even a swarm of wishiwashi — leaped out of the water.

"Oh, I’ve never been fishing!" said Ed. "Well, I’ve been with my dad a few times, but I don’t know if that counts, it was just in a lake or from the sea shore, not out at sea or anything. The biggest thing that got away was... well one time I dropped my rod in a rock-pool."

Becca laughed, then covered her mouth and tried to stifle it as Ed pouted, blushing.

"I did almost become a meal for a hungry shoal of sharpedo once," said Sly, glancing sideways at the two trainers. "Want to hear about it?"

"Oh, definitely!" shouted Becca, clapping her hands.

"Alright, well, I was down near the orange islands-"

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"I don’t trust him," I grumbled. "Hiding in the bushes, taking pictures of my trainer."

"He did explain—" began Bart.

"I know what I saw!" I snapped, blushing as I saw how Bart rolled up into a ball. Shadow gave me a dirty look as he moved to comfort the sandslash. I mumbled an apology to both of them.

"And I’ve seen how many times you’ve been Squirtled today, I’m surprised you’ve not become a vaporeon already," snarked Tully. I glared at the swellow as my trainer, Worst Child and Evil Interloper chatted.

"I don’t know, something just rubs me the wrong way about him. I know a scam when I see one."

"What’s his angle then?" asked Sissy, eyeing the red headed human. "You think he wants to steal pokémon? Scout for Team Rocket? We know they’re in the area, more or less."

"I don’t know," I said, glaring at him, my tail flicking from side to side in agitation, "but keep an eye on him. I’m going to go case the joint, see if he’s got any little helpers."

"You’re going to ‘case the joint’?" scoffed Sissy. "Have you been reading Becca’s fantasy novels about that crime-solving pikachu?"

"You know I can’t read," I grumbled, as I sloped off to interrogate the local lotads.

"Looking at the pictures then," Sissy continued to scoff, as I stuck my tongue out at her.

I trotted away from the group towards the lake, being careful to stay within earshot, but pounced on the nearest lotad once I got close enough. I landed on his — or her, lotads are kind of like bulbasaurs in how hard they are to tell apart — wide-brimmed leaf-hat and stuck my head under the brim, into the water.

"Where were you on the night of the fifteenth?" I demanded, speech muffled as bubbles exploded from my muzzle. I got a face full of bubble beam for my troubles. I shook the water out of my ears and yamper-paddled out a bit further and tried the same with a swanna. A few moments later, paddling for my life with a big tuft of fur missing out my tail, I interrogated the duckletts. A few moments after that I was really moving as the swanna-momma yeeted my furry, troublesome little self further into the depths of the lake. Spluttering as I came to the surface, I spotted a laughing totodile as he floated past on a lotad’s leaf.

"Have a nice trip?" he asked. I stuck my tongue out at him. "See you next fall!" he burst out in laughter so hard he was almost choking.

"Yeah, yeah. Yak it up, butterball," I grumbled. "You with that shifty red-headed kid?"

"Who, the human with the cameras? What’s it to ya?"

"I don’t trust him. And I don’t trust you."

"You wound me, Princess, you wound me! What’ve I ever done to you? And to think I was gonna fish you out of there... but if you wanna yamper-paddle all the way back to shore, I’ll let ya."

I looked around at the swanna — and their duckletts — and then back at the totodile. Both the bird-pokémon sorts were giving me the evil eye. "Fine, fine, truce. Get me outta here whilst I still have my tail on."

The totodile stuck his head under the water. There was a burbled conversation with the lotad he was sitting on, and then it began to move towards me. A few moments later I paddled my way onto the leaf. I stuck my head under the water to thank the lotad too, and he — or she, see earlier note — burbled their acceptance. Then the totodile pointed a lazy claw shore-wards and kicked a heel.

"Mush!"

The lotad mushed across the lake — we had to take the long way to avoid a drawn out and painful death by swanna — and the totodile sat back to enjoy it. "So, what brings you to my kingdom?" he asked.

"Trainer," I said, pointing a paw. "We’re actually looking for another member, I think. Ed’s gunning for the rock gym in Rustboro."

"That an invitation, Princess?"

"Ugh, not if you’re going to call me 'Princess'."

"Tough, that’s my fee. I get to call you Princess, you get a kick-ass pokémon able to whip that gym leader into the middle of next week." The totodile flexed, spewing a burst of water skywards. I couldn’t help but laugh.

"Uh huh. I think it’s worth bringing you just so I can see you get creamed." The lotad we were sitting on met the shore, and continued walking, emerging from the waters. I stood up and stretched as dry ground surrounded us, then shook my coat out. "If you think you’re cute, you can think again. I really am not interested. Our team’s only other female member’s already taken, so unless you’re into boys—"

"I could go either way," the totodile said off-pawedly, but then he straightened up. "Oh hel-lo, what is that vision of loveliness?"

I looked where the totodile’s gaze had fallen, and had to do a double-take. "Chompy!?"

"Is she with you?"

"Yes? Sort of."

"Humina humina. A body that goes all the way down and a tail that doesn’t quit."

"She’s... what, ten times bigger than you? With teeth bigger than your head?"

"Daddy like."

"You are disgusting," I huffed, screwing up my eyes and shaking my head.

"Oh relax, if you want a ride on the ‘dile express, you just have to ask."

I winced, sighing in mock-pain. "And I thought Ziggy was bad. Come on, you’ll either get chased off or you’ll cease to be my problem. I’ll introduce you, and if you don’t have a deathwish you’ll let me do the talking."

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"Becca?"

"Yes. Ed?"

"Remember when you were talking about catching a water pokémon to beat the rock gym?"

"Uh... yes, I... huh." Becca looked where Ed was pointing, as a soaking wet eevee led a light blue totodile to meet with the rest of Ed’s pokémon. "Is Lux actually being useful? I’m awake, right? Any tornadoes or explosions or other natural — or unnatural — disasters I should know about?"

"Do... Do you want to catch it? I don’t know if we have to battle it, but I do know I’ve got more pokémon than you, and—" Ed twiddled his fingers guiltily.

Becca snorted with derision. "The day I need your pokémon to bring me new team members is the day I quit all this and take up moo-moo husbandry. Come on, grab your pokéballs, we’ve probably still got some left from that time we beat up Team Rocket."

"You beat up Team Rocket?" exclaimed Sly as he jumped to his feet, fumbling with his cameras and lenses.

"Oh, yeah, it’s when Ed caught Ziggy, I’ll tell you about it when we head back to town."

"Why are you sure we’re going to head back to town?" asked Ed

"Because if Sly’s going to photograph this battle, Lux is going to find a way to show off, and we’re going to have to leave... probably in a hurry."

"Lux isn’t that bad," complained Ed.

"She picked on a steelix. By herself."

"...You may have a point."

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