Novels2Search
Oh Arceus, I'm a Pokemon! Now What?
Ch. 28: This Space For Rent

Ch. 28: This Space For Rent

“Eddie! Catch me!” I cried, as I leapt off the bluff at my trainer, sailing across the intervening gap like a fluffy brick. My repeated training of his reflexes recently had made him swifter, like a glameow. To his credit, he turned towards me.

“[What the-ARGHNOWAITGERROF!]”

Ed wasn’t swift enough though, clearly more training was necessary. The pair of us — eevee and trainer — were knocked for six across the sands, eventually coming to a halt in the surf, where we subsequently were both buried in the next wave.

“Whee! Let’s do that again!” I said, hopping up and down on Ed’s chest as he spat seaweed and saltwater out. Spluttering, Ed rolled to all fours and then got up to his feet, spitting and clearing great globs of sand from his face.

“[Thanks, Lux, thanks a lot. I needed a bath today and was running out of clean clothes…]”

“You’re welcome!” I shook the water and sand out of my coat and pranced towards the shore happily, as Ed shook his head, probably to clear the last of the water from his ears. Humans were so fragile, maybe I should be more careful with him? Naa, he’d never learn to look after himself like that. Tough love, that was the key.

“[Ah, your pokemon are back, huh? Had fun, li’l Sheila?]” Ollie asked me as I sauntered past him along the beach, to begin patrolling for interloping claunchers, krabbys or similar.

“Yeah! We went on an adventure! Oh, oh, don’t tell anybody,” I replied, indicating the rest of the team — including Ed who was glaring at me for some reason — before leaning in closer, “but we met a Mew! And I won the ‘see all the pokemon’ challenge, though Lucky says he won but don’t listen to him cos he’s a lying liar who lies.”

“Oi! You’re just bad at counting!” Lucky interjected.

“[Talkative little thing, isn’t she?]” Ollie asked, ruffling my head fur.

“You I like,” I said to him. “If we pokemon ever have to run the world, you’ll be given a favoured position. Not as high as Ed, but probably higher than the other one.”

Ed sighed. “[Yeah, ‘talkative’, that’s definitely the words I’d use to describe her.]”

“Hey! Don’t tell them I’m secretly a Mew!” said an off-yellow-and-green sandile.

I sat on the sand, licked a paw and slicked my fur down. “Well I wasn’t going to tell them it was you who was the mew, that’s your muddle to un-muddle. Besides, none of them speak Mew, let alone Eevee.”

“[Oh, you brought a little friend? Not many sandiles around these parts!]” said Sly, carefully reaching out a hand to try to pet my shiny friend, who promptly swanna-dived back under the sand and zoomed back a few feet.

“[Probably made a wrong turn at Albuquerque,]” said Ollie, chuckling, watching fondly as the sandile tracked his little furrows across the beach.

“[Or maybe it’s really a mew!]” said Becca, blinking as she came to a sudden thought. They were on ‘Faraway Island’, after all. Everyone turned to the sandile, who froze like a deerling in the headlights, before both Sly and Ollie laughed heartily.

“[Yeah, right, Rangers have been searching for Mew on this island for years. Like it’d just waddle up as something as unlikely as a sandile! Silly bugger probably bit a dragonite or something and forgot to let go. Or maybe there’s a colony of ‘em, this place is big enough.]”

“[Could be,]” agreed Sly. “[Hey, speaking of Mew, you wanna see some of the ruins?]”

There was a chorus of agreement, and the pokemon — plus sandile — followed the rangers as they led the way inland.

----------------------------------------

There were gasps of excitement and wonder as the cave-markings were revealed in the baleful, dancing torchlight. Ancient carvings, full of mystery and wonder, from a lost author.

“[That’s incredible,]” said Ed, gingerly reaching out a hand. He snatched it back moments later, then took a deep breath and reached out again, very, very gently feeling the indentations.

“[You betcha, wondrous to see such a thing. Just look, all these carvings of Mew, this writing, it’s a lost trove of treasure. If only we could understand it, but our best and brightest can’t make head nor tail of it.]”

“Up up, down down, left right, left right, b, a and… start?” I asked. “What’s that supposed to mean? And why can I read it?”

“You know I’m not sure? And it’s basically Grandad’s fault.” Mew-sandile shrugged, wagging his tail. “It was in grandad’s notes, so I copied them out. I’m pretty sure it’s important.”

“What is ‘up plus b’ supposed to refer to?” grumbled Tully. He tilted his head. “Or is it ‘down’? Wisdom of the universe on these walls and we have this scatterbrain to thank for their rendition of it,” the swellow mumbled under his breath, “what even is a ‘zig’ and how would you remove one?”

----------------------------------------

It was a much more sombre group of people who found themselves boarding Captain Briney’s boat that afternoon to make their final trip to Dewford. As Briney fired up the engines, Ollie stood on the shore with his arms crossed.

“Trainers,” he roared, above the noise, “when you get to Dewford, your training will start. Be ready, for your own sake I expect results.”

“We promise, Mister Ollie,” shouted Becca, waving. “We’re in this to win it.”

“Yeah! We’re not gonna slouch! You teach us, we’ll learn!”

“That’s what I wanna hear! You too, Sly, don’t be no drongo, hard yakka all the way, right?”

“Yessir!” said Sly, saluting. The sandile saluted too, before diving under the sands with a cheeky wave of his tail and zooming away.

“Wait!” cried Becca, sudden confusion dawning on her face. “How are you getting home? How did you get here?”

“Don’t worry about me, Sheila! We’ll be alright, my mate Bruce an’ few others’re swinging by. We’ve got an important meeting starting soon, thought it’d be a good place to meet, two fletchlings, one ball, you know?”

There was a shimmer in the air, and a claydol appeared, along with a man in a similarly be-corked hat as Ollie.

“Ozzaaa!” the new man shouted.

“Bazzaaa!” Ollie shouted back. Both their arms spread wide, and then ended up half hugging and half punching each other in greeting. There was another shimmer, and another; another claydol arrived, followed by abras, kirlias, xatus…

The author's tale has been misappropriated; report any instances of this story on Amazon.

“Jezzaa! Brucey! Gang’s almost all here! Break out the stubbies, the nipper’s are off we ain’t gotta share ‘em with those c-!”

“All aboard who’s coming aboard!” shouted Briney, once the loud call of the ship’s horn he’d just blown faded away. Ed, Becca, Sly and their assorted pokemon hustled to get their gear stowed away. Sly paused as there came a crash followed by jeers from the beach.

“Wahey ya Wazza! Never teleport tipsy!”

Another ranger, or possibly pokemon trainer, it was unclear at this point, had arrived, only he and the pokemon he’d teleported in with had got things a bit off and he’d ended up in a nearby tree. Sly chuckled, shaking his head, as the boat rode the waves and Faraway Island receded into the distance. There was a snatch of music that floated by on the wind, and the flames of a bonfire flared as an obvious party was getting underway.

“Do you… think they just wanted us out of the picture?” asked Ed quizzically.

“Does an ursaring shi—” started Briney.

“Aaand I believe we’ve all had a long day,” said Sly, pushing his younger charges below deck. “Get yourselves cleaned up and we’ll have some grub ourselves whilst the weather’s good. Ed, get a complete change, you're still soaked from the beach. Next stop, Dewford!” The two trainers cheered. “And your gym battles with Wattson and Brawly’s personal teams will be setup in a few days after that.”

Ed and Becca turned first white as a litwick, then green.

----------------------------------------

A few days of mostly uneventful sailing later, the S.S. Peeko III arrived in Dewford, pulling up at the docks in a smooth manoeuvre that showed Briney’s expertise with sailing.

“[I’ll be around if’n ye need me,]” the old man said, tipping a non-existent hat, before he headed off to a local bar, Peeko on his shoulder.

“I’ll be around if’n ye need me,” Peeko called, from his perch.

“Thanks Peeko!” I called, stretching after the long boat ride. “Ah! So this is Dewford, eh?”

“Yeah, it’s a nice place,” said Sissy, looking around at the relaxed atmosphere of the island we now found ourselves on. “I was hatched here, in granite cave. I remember…” she paused, a wistful expression on her face. “I was always one of those ‘mon to go looking at the sky, wishing I could just… go out under it. I was too small back then, but then Becca came, she still had Treecko at the time. They weren’t really getting on, but they tried. And so I let them beat me.” The mawile grinned mischievously.

“You let them beat you?” I asked.

“Yeah, fake tears and all, though it didn’t ust roll over, I made them work for it, but judged Becca had that something. It might’ve been the push that led to Chompy joining, really. We didn’t beat Brawly, and it was soon after that Becca… went home.” Sissy looked mournful now, but then something changed in her expression. Her frown changed, her glare hardened. “I think it’s time we found out how good we’ve gotten, huh?”

When she looked up from the ground, her grin was downright boiling with Dark energy. She skipped away down the beach, advancing on a kingler. Seemingly not knowing where she was going, she tripped over one of the creature’s legs, shoving it badly as she, too, fell to the ground with a cry.

“Oh brother,” I muttered, rolling my eyes, as I watched her start to sniffle and cry.

“Now you know how I feel,” Tully snarked, as he took up his once-customary perch on my back. I watched the show as, predictably, the kingler started to first get angry, but then backed away as Sissy cried.

“Hey, what’re you doing you stupid idiot?”

“I’m sorry!”

“I oughta snap your legs off, you little brat!”

Sissy wailed louder, “I’m sorry!” she cried, tears streaming from her face. “I’m just a clumsy little female, I didn’t mean to hurt such a big, powerful male like you! Please don’t hurt me! Please! I’m small and weak, I beg you!”

Kingler took a few steps back, as various ‘mon around him gave him dirty looks. “Listen, uh, miss, I know—”

“I mean it’s not my fault you’re so big and clumsy, you probably can’t help being such a klutz and just stomping over everything like a whole herd of tauros.”

Honestly, it was beautiful to see, how the crustacean went from remorseful and embarrassed to steaming mad in almost seconds.

“Why, you! I’m gonna break every bone in your stupid little body!” He brought his claw down for a badly telegraphed crunch, and instead found that — double-timing her fake tears and her second set of jaws — Sissy had whirled around and caught the lunge in one go, whilst wailing and crying like she was being beat up. In a dramatic twirl that looked both like she was wanting to get away, and doubled as an expert whirling throw, she spun and flung the kingler back out to sea. There was a bright, pulsating flash of Fairy Wind as she boosted her toss, sending the big oaf flying. She ran back to Lucky, and threw herself into his arms, the Croconaw looking shocked and then supremely happy with himself as he patted Sissy on the back, minding his paws as she deftly snapped her ferocious second set of jaws to keep him honest.

“Hey! Who beat up my pal Kingler?” burbled a tentacool, as it and three friends stomped — flopped, mostly — out of the water on their tentacles.

“He was being mean to my — OW! — our girl Sissy here! What’s it to ya? Gonna apologize? I’m waiting.”

“Apologize, he says,” said the tentacruel. “You’re having a laugh, aint he, boys?”

“Yer, apologizin’, good one. Think we should, ah, ‘apologize’?”

“I fink somebody needs to.”

“Oh, don’t start,” I said, fluffing up my tail. “You don’t want to see anybody hurt, do you?”

“I think we just might, you know?” asked a deeper voice, as a gyarados rose out of the waters. I saw more than a few humans start to get a bit nervous, backing away from the confrontation. The sea-serpent loomed up out of the water, and clouds began to gather as his eyes flashed. Rain began to fall as the winds rose.

For a brief moment, I closed my eyes. Deep inside, I could still feel it. I didn’t know what the move was called, but it was there. It wasn’t as strong as when wielded by the one who taught it to me, but it was there, somehow. I exerted my will, digging deep. I felt lightning flashing from the tip of my tail as my fur all stood on end. It was like the world breathed out; the rain stopped, the wind died, the skies parted and the sun came out.

“I think me and friends were hoping you’d say that,” I said, grinning.

----------------------------------------

Nurse Joy whistled happily as she finished tidying up the magazines in the pokecenter. Trainer Monthly, What Pokemon, Ranger — whoops, that one was hers — and the like. She tutted as she moved to put the more salacious gossip rags in a better pile, Mews Muse was running a special on some rocks that somebody had found in Alola that some crackpot was claiming could make your pokemon bigger — honestly, if she had a pokedollar for every email she got saying there was this cream or that machine to increase the size of her…

“Nurse Joy! Nurse Joy!”

“Please help! We just arrived in Dewford—”

“—and our pokemon got into a fight—”

“—and now they’re hurt and we caught—”

“—a gyarados and—”

Nurse Joy shook her head, chuckling, as the two young trainers wailed at her. Business as usual. “Alright, kids, in you come. One at a time… oh my, those are some painful looking injuries, how come they’re not in their balls?”

“They refused!” the boy wailed. “We tried but they just wouldn’t stay in!”

Joy looked over the motley bunch of pokemon. An eevee with a black eye and a missing tooth. A croconaw with a slice across his muzzle and what looked like part of a claw stuck in his tail. A zigzagoon with what looked like sooty striped marks from, if she was any judge, electricity burns, a swellow with a busted wing… she took a deep breath. “Let me guess, I should see the other guy? Alright, names?”

“Umm, Becca. That’s Ed. There, uh, was no other guy.”

“Your pokemon got into a scrap all by themselves?”

“Yeah, we had a long trip over, I think they got kind of bored,” said Ed. “Please help!”

“Well they obviously wanted to show off for you, so they can’t be too badly hurt. Alright, you’ve made your point.” Joy stood up straighter, crossed her arms over her chest and glared at the assembled creatures. “EVERYONE BACK IN THEIR BALLS NOW!”

The sound of at least ten pokemon returning themselves was deafening, as was the combined click of their balls locking. Several other pokemon hanging out in the center also returned themselves, refusing to come out even when their trainers tried to get them to.

“Chansey, fire up the healing machine, we might need to run a couple of cycles. Honestly, tourists. Alright, Ed, Becca, you’d better tell me from the top.”

----------------------------------------