We tore through the hallways and chambers of the Hive Ship, while a massive battle continued to rage between the ant defenders and beetle intruders. It was interesting that they cared more about their rivalry than about us sneaking into their base.

“Turn right here,” Tina announced and I dutifully obeyed.

We zoomed around a corner and down a narrow tunnel, which had a warm orange light at the end. As soon as we came out at the other end and I saw what stretched out above us, I lost a hold on my Fuck Gravity effect and it cancelled out completely.

The three of us dropped to the papery floor, which cushioned our fall.

Steve gasped awake and then his eyes were stuck wide-open as he took in the enormous chamber. Although that word felt too small for what we were seeing.

Starting from the floor and going up the walls into the darkness far above were hundreds-of-thousands of round bulbs. The bottom half of each bulb was shaped like a bowl using the papery material, while a golden-orange honey droplet sat within and trapped a person like a bug in amber.

No, not a person. A child.

This was where all of Earth’s children had gone. This was the so-called Children Zone.

“It’s just like the Matrix,” Steve muttered in awe.

I got up from the floor. “What’s that?” I asked.

Tina and Panda both gave me a look, while Steve seemed incensed.

“You’ve never watched it!? It’s a masterpiece!” he exclaimed, not seeming to care that there was a Minor Warden flitting around between the bulbs high above. She seemed to be checking on the condition of each child inside the amber-like droplets.

“I’m surprised you don’t know it,” Panda agreed. “They showed it on the TV in the Asylum’s common room all the time.”

“How have you never watched it!?” Steve went on.

“It was a bit hard to follow the plot of any story on that TV,” I said. “What with all the screaming and whatnot.”

“They were always showing movies they knew triggered people,” Panda commented.

Tina nodded. “It’s because they lost money whenever a patient stopped being psychotic and could be transferred back to jail or released out into the world.”

“We’re wasting time,” I said and strode across the floor of the disturbing chamber. It didn’t look anything like what Bee had said the CPS pamphlet described. There was no farm and petting zoo type thing going on.

Panda pointed ahead to a different kind of structure that stood in the middle of the floor. There were no real paths to the center, but just small gaps between the countless pods with children inside. The structure was like an artistic and organically-shaped doorway that stood inside a circular recess in the floor. From the rounded top of the doorway was the same gloopy honey-like substance, filling out the shape. It glowed amber and reminded me somewhat of the Dreamland doors.

“I see a door, I’m going through it,” I said.

“We don’t know where it leads, so that might be a bad idea,” Panda cautioned.

“Oh, I know where it leads,” I said. My Manhunter’s Badge was pointing right at it after all.

A sudden angry crackle of electric energy snapped through the air above.

“Trespassers!” screamed a distorted female voice from the same direction.

“Oh shit! The Warden has spotted us!” Panda exclaimed.

I gestured to Tina and Steve who were lagging behind. “Come on, follow me!”

I sprinted across the floor as the Minor Warden fell down towards us, while preparing her energy magic. However, I felt certain that she would show restraint in this place, since I doubted she was allowed to harm the bulbs with the children inside.

As I ran, I realized that it was faster to use Fuck Gravity than my legs, so I hopped off the ground and reoriented its pull so it was centered on the amber-glowing honey doorway.

When my feet hit the strange substance, my momentum slowed significantly, though I was still falling through it. I could also feel how my legs were clearly emerging somewhere else and not just passing right through.

While the doorway slowly consumed me, I aimed a finger of my balloon gauntlet at the descending Minor Warden. It was focused on Tina from the looks of it.

The exact moment she launched the lattice prison spell she’d been preparing, I shouted, “.interrupt( )!”

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The Warden’s head flicked in my direction in annoyance, before lashing its arm towards me and flinging a rope of crackling-orange energy. My eyes widened as it came within inches of my face, but then the doorway released a loud slurp and pulled me all the way through, saving my head from decapitation.

WARNING!

Now entering ‘Children’s Zone #22’!

I landed on my back as my Fuck Gravity lost its target and was cancelled. Unlike the Hive Ship’s hallways and chambers, I didn’t land on a papery floor. Instead it was soft grass and dirt that caught me.

“Do you think the others are alright?” Panda worried.

I sat up and looked back at where I’d come from. But there was nothing there.

“It’s a bit too late for me to help them now,” I muttered, feeling a tiny bit of guilt about going in first and leaving them to fight off the Warden.

“I know you want to save Bee, but you can’t just sacrifice everyone to get her back,” Panda scolded me.

“I’m not sacrificing anyone!”

“What about Chris?”

“That wasn’t my fault and you know it!”

“If you hadn’t pushed so hard, maybe you’d been more prepared for Logan’s ambush,” Panda argued.

“I didn’t hear you stop me. You’re just as guilty as me.”

Then Steve’s horrified face slowly appeared in mid-air above the small hill I’d landed on. His hands, feet, belly, legs, arms, and all the rest appeared right after, until the viscous doorway let go of him and he plopped to the ground on his knees.

He was breathing heavily, while looking around.

“Where are we?” he asked. His bald dome was reflecting the light of a sun in the sky above.

I took in our surroundings as well and was surprised by what I saw. It was an idyllic idea of 60s era suburbia, with large colorful houses. They were identical in shape and all had their own front lawns, as well as kids’ versions of family cars parked in the driveways. The ‘cars’ were pedal-operated and clearly quite a hit with the many kids playing around and pretending to be families.

Along with the neat houses were also hills with swing sets and playgrounds, as well as parks with fruit trees full of apples, oranges, pears, cherries, and so on. Kids between four and eighteen were running around, laughing, playing, and just seeming to have a great time.

Some of the older children were using nerf guns and defending cardboard forts built around the streets and parks, while others were roaming on scooters, skateboards, and roller-skates. Meanwhile, the younger kids seemed to be mostly centered around the playgrounds and houses.

As I watched, a boy of maybe eight nosedived off the top of a tall pyramid of climbable ropes. He hit the ground below and immediately bounced to his feet, completely unscathed.

“This is beyond trippy,” I muttered.

“It doesn’t look like any of the kids are in trouble,” Panda said.

I looked back to where Steve had emerged from the air. “Is Tina coming or what?”

“She said she’d lead the Warden away,” Steve answered.

I frowned. “Goddamnit, Steve.”

“What’d I do!?”

I got to my feet. The Manhunter’s Badge was pointing in the direction of a nearby park. “Let’s just find Bee and get out of—”

Children’s Zone Update

New occupants detected!

Adjusting parameters of Happiness Algorithm…

Loading assets…

“What does that mean?” Steve asked.

Then two voluptuous and beautiful women wearing summer dresses materialized out of nowhere and sauntered over to where Steve was sitting in the grass.

“Hey big guy, do you want to play with us?” they asked in unison.

Predictably, the Birthday Brat’s eyes went wide with perverted desire.

“What the fuck?”

I walked up to one of them and prodded her in the forehead. She was real, although she didn’t react to my touch at all.

I glared at Steve. “Is this your wish fulfilment happening here? Is that what this place is?”

Then the announcement repeated.

Children’s Zone Error

Failed to load assets!

Readjusting parameters of Happiness Algorithm…

Loading assets…

“I think it’s struggling to cope with whatever would make you happy,” Panda said, looking at me.

Steve, meanwhile, was walking down the hill with the two women, hand-in-hand.

“His form of happiness seems pretty shallow…” I muttered in disgust. “Though I can’t say I’m surprised.”

Children’s Zone Error

Failed to load assets!

All checks failed!

Corruption detected!

Summoning Technician!

Summoning failed!

Summoning Technician!

Summoning failed!

Aborting…

Panda sighed. “Great. You broke it.”

“I didn’t do anything!” I defended myself.

Then the sun in the sky switched off and the idyllic Children’s Zone was cast in darkness. My Transition Lenses immediately activated and I saw that all the kids had vanished from the houses, streets, and parks. The Manhunter’s Badge still pointed in the same direction as before, but I felt fairly confident now that it wasn’t pointing me to somewhere within this place.

Steve was standing further down the hill by himself. It seemed he had snapped out of whatever strange trance the zone had affected him with.

“Gambit!? What happened? Where are you?” he called, unable to see me.

“Use your lamp ability thing!” Panda yelled down to him.

“Okay! IKEA Catalogue: ‘Årstid’!”

A simple table lamp appeared in the air above him, casting a ring of light on the grass.

Then an earthquake rolled through the area, collapsing several houses and knocking over trees.

Just to really make matters worse, a familiar sound echoed throughout the zone.

TICKLE…

TICKLE…