Climbing over heaps of powdered ice wasn’t remotely fun, even if snowplough man bravely thread ahead of me. Bathrobe and slippers really wasn’t the choice clothing for this misadventure, as heated as they were. My naked shins felt cut up and ready to blister.

And I was so short of breath. It’s like I’ve never walked before. Granted, the terrain wasn’t the even pavement I was so used to, but this was bordering ridiculous.

Why were we trudging through this nightmare scape again? Right, demon wanted to go sightseeing. Fuck that guy. I dove into a fresh snowdrift, mostly on purpose, and it was so soft for about five seconds. Then my face started hurting.

“Fine. Carry me,” I said to the looming shadow. He’d offered the first time I lost the ability to find breathable air, but I couldn’t stand him close. All reservations have since burnt away. What was the point of that again? I forgot.

He scooped me up and I relaxed into the embrace without meaning to. This felt… so restful. Not at all like an embrace of despotic mass-murderer.

“What business have you got with them land wrinkles anyway? Seen something bigger and took it personally? Are you going to flatten the audacious assholes?” I swatted my palm downwards. I’ll blame that on the lack of oxygen. My conscious mind was shutting down and the tongue was his own person.

Monster kept quiet so long I thought we were mercifully going to pretend it didn’t happen. “Your world is small,” he murmured as though in passing.

Implications of that weren’t comforting, in grand scheme of things. “So yours is bigger, is that what you’re saying?”

“Much,” he spoke solemnly as though completely missing the pun. Of course he would, this goddamn dickless alien.

“So you already know mountains are smaller and aren’t taking offence, what the heck for are we going there again?”

“I’m told people enjoy the view.”

This asshole did just want to sightsee. “You dragging me through snow to feel small and insignificant because you’ve developed hedonistic traits after getting hit over the head a little? Oh, I guess you wouldn’t understand, you’re clearly going there to have an ego boost since the damn mountain range is so puny.”

“You’re not interested?”

“Hm. Let me think. All my friends are dead. I physically couldn’t care less about aesthetics.” I was essentially kidnapped, I had no obligation to be an enthusiastic travel companion.

“Where would you like to go?”

This tale has been unlawfully obtained from Royal Road. If you discover it on Amazon, kindly report it.

First instinct was to say some ways underground, but I really rather not play games with potentially very literal demon.

“I’m so sick of outdoors,” I muttered my honest thoughts. It was warm and almost cosy in my monstrous carriage, but piddling ice on my face was growing to be a nuisance. I was tired of sleeping on the leaves, and I looked forward to getting comfortable on the snow even less.

Monster breathed in as if in surprise and took a sharp turn into another nondescript direction. That startled me and I masked it with venom, “What? Caught a whiff of other orphans you could bully?” Please, let that be the case.

He inhaled again. “Possibly,” monster’s nonchalance gave me a chill. Red eyes cast a glance at my expression and explained, “I smell a town that way.”

I smelled the oncoming pneumonia. There was nothing ahead that my eyes could see either. “I hope it’s closer than the damn mountains,” I voiced my reservations, but was thrilled nevertheless. Then I remembered my company. “Are you gonna eat them?”

“I’m not going to consume them. Far too much on my mind already,” he said and the wide eyes had an almost haunted look, whatever that meant in demonic. “But I will kill if I deem it warranted.”

I shrugged, having nothing against some necessary murdering. Repeat of the last time I was carried like this was wanted about as much as a violent food poisoning. Regardless, I doubted special forces would get a drop on him again. The damned creature all but enjoyed every moment of noxious sauna I caused. All he lacked there was a towel.

“Aw poor you, cannibalising your own child is giving you indigestion?” I mocked without a drop of sympathy.

“Many more new fragments…” wild gaze flailed as if looking at something else entirely. Great. The only thing that beat being captured by a monster, was being captured by an unstable monster. Was he always like this and noticeable just now because of the face? Why was he even wearing one to begin with?

Eyes refocused back on me, “That wasn’t a child. There are no families. We don’t reproduce that way.”

“That way, no. But a different way – hell yea you do.”

“I cast off so much there ought to be quadrillions of progenies. Most of the shed flesh gets consumed by others, some develop and grow themselves. By that logic, entire world would be related. Two of us have exchanged flesh, even now you produce my scent. What does that make us?”

I wasn’t prepared for this deep a level of conversation. I had no answers. Serves me right for trying to be smart with a barely portable brain. I was aware most of this was just a personal hang-up.

I was ready to abandon the topic but the devil wasn’t done nailing that coffin, “You discard your genetic material left and right and don’t seem to worry about it much either.”

My lips twisted up because I was sure he didn’t mean the lost arms, teeth or bloody smears. “Yeah, well, chances of my sperm coming back to haunt me are exceedingly low, seeing as all of my clients were men, but if a kid of striking resemblance comes tugging on the pants leg, I wouldn’t kick it! Hell, goddamn Ruby made me watch over the entire kindergarten…”

Fuck. Trying hard not to think about it only tripped me harder later. I stuffed the sentiment back where it came from and grasped for an immediate distraction. I asked, “Couldn’t you just talk to it?”

White-haired monster trudged along as though I hadn’t asked, but I knew he was thinking. Or was lost among his fragments… which essentially translated into deep thought too. “You humans have concept of long lost relatives showing up and asking for favours, especially after financial success,” monster spoke as though to a little child, but it struck a chord. Oh hell yeah, I would have loved to mooch off a rich grandparents if I tracked them down. We used to spend hours daydreaming about it.

“Eyeful’s idea of talking was linking the brain. It’s neither easy nor safe. It smelled of me, so I knew it was capable of assimilation same way that I am.”

Blew a raspberry. “So you’re telling me you were afraid of it? Itsy bitsy puny thing that it was?”

“It could have had other advantages. I’m stuck in my form and habits. Most of me just sleeps, too. It could have been a parent as well. Older and more cunning.”

I have somehow overlooked that this ancient predator did not materialise out of thin air one day either. That place was some nightmare fuel.

“And yet you charged it after a minor inconvenience,” I called bullshit again.

“Taking a bite of something that smells like me by another grand being is a deliberate challenge. And besides, most miniscule things can become a monumental presence in my world… You had so much potential,” he added after a break.

“Had?” I wondered, immediately suspecting ill-intent.

“My body denatures in presence of your blood; you’d die if I tried improving you.”

So he knew. Disappointment hit me like a hammer. Waved goodbye to my stealthy death plan, as well as belief that perhaps he was starting to respect boundaries. Yeah, fat chance of that being the case.

“Oh no! I’ll have to die eventually, just like I’ve always wanted,” I mocked the crestfallen demon. He had nothing to say.