“New plan, Quirce.” The empire had been solidified. Searchers found and retrieved every last officer and crusader, even the Cs and UCs they might have forgotten without Cataloguing's reminders. Some who had stayed home before signed up as well, such as a bearded Rare who begged to join Construction when he heard about the opportunities for hauling cargo and handing things to other people, or Jonathan Brightwater, who agreed to offer his strength in exchange for low-value Slay Every Dragon farmable gear of the LG, MG, and HG rarities that brightened up the room when placed on an ornamental weapon rack. “Such as” is a special phrase that implies more without lying about it. Two new officers joined in total. Exploring also added a new minister, the wide-ranging Master T, and many slayers clamored to be given responsibilities by the burgeoning bureaucracy.
Recruiting has its charms, but conquest is the cake that requires charming icing, if anyone has ever described icing as charming before. Some magazine probably has. The empire claimed Divine Providence against unspeakable opposition and Dust and Highway with Doctor Erwin's full support. That traitor. Other mayors cooperated as well, and the common citizens objected only when their new suzerains wanted to conduct elementercise in the stadium and rowdy feasts in the bars. It should be the other way around, they insisted, and so it was done. Everyday Pin suffered a fortress to be built with no outcry but rather general approval once Construction posted the plans for an Inferno lane with flaming gutters. All those bases went up without trouble, but concerns over furnishing and stocking them sent Eten to Planning, and Planning to Quircy Rau during a general assembly.
“Everybody's partying so hard, we ran out of glowsticks. We know where Styleful Happy!! To the Live is. We pay them a visit. That's the plan.”
“A visit, Zims?”
“A visit.”
“I see. Ha ha.
“Heehee.”
“Ahahaha!”
“Eehyeehyee!”
“OHOHOHOHOHO!”
The assembly first voted on a resolution that Zimley Boe had kind of a creepy laugh when she really got going, which the assembled had not realized before, especially not the slayers who had just joined. One unanimous decision later, with no dissent even from Zimley, debate on the plan opened.
“Planning must be confident in success to propose this directly,” Rylweadh of Mercy reasoned. “The only confidence they ever have is overconfidence. I predict a disaster which will destroy Planning's reputation. For that reason, I must support the measure.”
Gary Whitecrest stood. “You're way off, Your Honor. This'll be easier than packing a travel bag an hour before the town gets wise. That's why I'm in favor.”
Wedding Singer Vritia rose and shook her fist at both of them in turns. “This isn't about confidence or fleecing. We're going to check on those girls, who are always doing their best, and we're going to have a good time together, and there will be no problems. None. Of course we have to vote yes.”
Michael requested permission to speak next. “Is our aim conquest or something else? My vote rests on this and no other consideration.” The loud applause indicated the opinion of a great portion of the audience, including Ivar, Arrarix, and Mentor Tendradius Pux.
“Zimley Boe said merely that we would visit. I know she and Quircy Rau followed that statement with maniacal laughter. I understand why that affects your perception of the plan. However, as some of you, our friends from other games most of all, might not be familiar with those two, I am compelled to mention by way of example that I once was present when Quircy cackled her head off while she was baking a cake she claimed would have 'more flavor than you bargained for.' It was delicious.”
Stolen content warning: this tale belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences elsewhere.
“Glad you liked it.”
Solemn Declaration bowed toward Quircy, which those same friends from other games perceived as a sign of fealty till other officers explained that he, at least, knew his manners.
“He? At least? Compared to who? Oh, wait. You mean Local Celebrity. She's just boisterous. They're both good kids.” Youl sat down almost as soon as she had unsat herself.
Further debate could produce nothing more informative, but the host furthered anyway, till the very last. No battle won by level 150 URs would have been lost by 149s, but skimping on that last level would have been weird. Perverse, even. Not otherwise did the debaters leave nothing unsaid, and as a result the discussion lasted long enough for Michael to declare he would vote for a day trip to a stupid idol game if it got them to do something right away, though not using those words. He said “forthwith” instead.
The ayes won when Quircy accidentally called for a vote by dropping her gavel, and the horde abode by the results. The earlier Slay Every Dragon exercise justified itself in the speed and efficiency the host demonstrated in loading up, rolling out, and shutting up for another installment in the Loudly Yelled Lecture Series, that one delivered by Vritia Umox, bridal edition, on the subject of how concert tours are the real money. Albums are for the label, and the label is, if not the enemy, far different from a friend.
“I have a question, but it might be really, really rude!”
“Rudeness is both inescapable and desirable when it comes to rock and roll! Especially when you tell off producers!”
Serena Renzis took a deep breath. “Are you made out of jade!”
“No! That's how luman skin looks! It's still normal skin though! Sweat and everything, right there on stage! If you don't sweat much, have somebody offstage with a towel and a bucket of water to wet you down during quick breaks! The crowd gets into it more if it looks like you're exhausted! Like you're barely hanging on! They'll go nuts if you kind of limp off the stage slowly then run back! Once per show only though!”
The empire's understanding of Styleful Happy!! To the Live far surpassed that which it had possessed during its first visit, much like a player who downloaded Commandment of Hero and uninstalled it after failing to summon Rylweadh, only to reinstall after checking that Fomalhaut07 video again and realizing he said to get Rylweadh of Mercy, who filled a different role entirely, and then uninstalled again after not summoning her either. Understanding and happiness are not synonyms. “Abstruse” and “recondite” are, though, as are “serene” and “halcyon.”
The landship slowed, rolled up to the options menu, and halted just short over the course of minutes. That behemoth, that wheeled whale, stopped on mints, not on dimes, and necessitated careful handling unless Vinnette Melban wanted to jerk to a halt and send Quircy Rau through a graceful arc that ended in a few bounces and maybe some rolling.
“That sounds fun . . .”
“What was that, Caduceus?”
“Nothing! We're here!”
The escort vehicles pulled up alongside. They could stop on dimes, or at least quarters, but their riders cared nothing for small change when they could win prizes for the longest skid instead. “Victory to Higgins of Fort Fondue! A biker worthy of praise!” Kojiro led the cheer and invited Higgins to Back in first. He did so, after adjusting his bow tie and giving his smug smile time to enjoy itself.
Styleful Happy!! To the Live! The pleasant evening, the background thumping that implied people partied somewhere in the city, and above the largest stadium, the flotilla of ships designed by someone who had used up all the shapes besides long rectangles on earlier projects.
“I see the SHTTL space program is in full swing,” Quircy Rau said. “Who, what, and why? Inorrea?”
“On it.”
“No way!” A different blonde officer of a much lower rarity shoved stronger officers aside by means of a burst of strength normally reserved for the final battle when your friends and everyone else you wanted to protect are in danger at the hands of a villain out to return the world to zero. “That's a Monitor-class frigate! And a Perseus-class destroyer! And a Glattes, and a Voidhunter, and . . . Oh! Is that! It iiiiiiisssss!” Sindze U. Radalo's shouts descended, or perhaps ascended, into squeals. “A Kobukson-class battleship! I want one! No! I need one!”
Information Gathering collected that intelligence, analyzed it, ran it through the files, put top consultants on it, and did an internet search. “Furious Galaxy is here,” Serdon Miloz announced. He added, “They look synthy to me. Do they like synth?”