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SFC 18. Greed's Bitter Fruit

SFC 18. Greed's Bitter Fruit

Back on the road, or riding a rocket through the sky, same thing, Metatron yelled a proposal. “To split one's forces is merited at times.”

“Like when I barely get a punch in. Yeah, yeah, I get you,” Andit yelled back boxingly.

“Are you so eager to find more games? So confident that the numerical superiority we have over a game based on a property with eight or so recurring characters will hold in all cases? 'Hurry slowly,' the man said, but you may decide our circumstances are far from alike if you wish,” said Gintus Pelluina.

“Yes or no?” Solemn Declaration asked.

“To deny Strategists their weaseling! How uncouth. I say no.”

The ensuing high-speed vote obeyed none of the conventional divisions of element or class except one, in that the Reapers threw their noisy, boisterous weight behind the affirmative position and won to promise themselves a Nova-filled future. Reaver also voted yes, but not as part of the bloc. Metatron next proposed Michael procure some of those big dump trucks he had avoided buying earlier because they looked slow. That measure required no debate, but only that lust for higher piles of promotional mugs and signed headphones be universally felt.

The outpost vault sufficed for the treasure they had, but not the piles they anticipated. “Don't put on that second story yet,” logistics consultant Kindo recommended. “Load up the trucks and then dump it all like at once like blaaaarrrrrggh, you know?” They knew, though not all approved of the imagery.

Michael and three of his angelic underlings returned with the treasure trucks, and the horde knocked down three statues instead of one. Metatron led a third of the army one way, and what adventures they had, what triumphs and sorrows, would thrill readers to such a degree that they might risk heart attacks or explosive faints. Therefore those sections will be excluded. Eten led another third, and see above for how that went. Quircy Rau wanted to lead the third third, but Morgana used her uncanny magic to call dibs early. As a result, that group's expedition turned out too boring to repeat.

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The three thirds returned after countless adventures in untold games, their dump trucks only partly filled, and shuffled their rosters. Quircy Rau, Merlin, and Hot Air Hank commanded the next forays, and as a result, they encountered more eye-widening adventures and intrigues than ever before. Even those bold captains failed to fill the trucks. A third set of sorties went out under Mentor Tendradius Pux, Asmodeus, and Sindze U. Radalo till the host realized its mistake and replaced her with Belphoebe. The strange and wonderful events of those three journeys could never be recollected by the participants later without a sigh, and therefore ought to remain private, indeed intimate, for all time.

Their memories preserved forever the true treasures of those trips, but the dump trucks hauled a lot of loot as a bonus. Accountants counted coins, rings, crowns, and enough boots for a centaur football team while Eumorsedio catalogued haunted statues and ones less haunted. Spices and additives promised future meals would be more flavorful than the gruel of the past. Signed basketballs rolled and bounced out, including one Gaelvry had intended to give her sister before she recalled the tragedy of the broken backboards and Aerywe's refusal to switch East Beruvia's sports equipment away from glass. Speaking of balls, if you grab one disco ball, might as well grab a dozen. Ivar lived his life by that creed to the enrichment of the horde as a whole.

Driving unusual vehicles and enjoying perennial success, the raiders returned to the outpost and debated how to handle their gains. “I'm serious, just dump it all on there at once,” Kindo said, and that ended the debate. The army arrayed itself in a ring around the square treasury and watched the three treasure trucks back toward the building with the caution and skill expected from operators of the Holy element, as the crusaders claimed when they nominated Power, Throne, and Principality for the job. Those drivers stopped atop the ultra-strength hydraulic platforms which Lunacy Bike had sold at prices higher than any of the actual vehicles cost. There they waited while the platforms elevated them above the vault's roof, and then the beds tilted.

The goods flowed out in a manner the spectators could not compare to anything but the image Kindo suggested earlier. They clapped and tried to think of rivers of gold or cornucopias instead, but failed. Chunks of treasure spread all over the roof, just everywhere, so hard to clean up, and higher and higher as well, but then lower when the supporting walls buckled and collapsed. The uncontainable hoard fell through, hit the floor, overpowered that too, and opened up a hole that ate up the treasure, the treasury, and all the treasurers.