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Puppy Love

Puppy Love

Xeno Contact Committee, Aix-en-Provence, RF Earth

The office was notable for its calm silence and comforting voices as humanity mediated its way across the galaxy, one disaster at a time. In a previous generation, they would have been air-traffic control or a mix of emergency numbers sending aid or justice to the incoherent, the unlucky or the damned. They still were in many ways. One of the coordinators scratched his head for a moment and signalled that he had an Event, Level 4 with an unknown. His team were already digging for more detail as he stood up. He looked exactly like most of the humans that worked here. Tall, thin and tired. There was probably more grey hair in this room than you would expect but it seemed to come with the job.

He knocked softly on the door and stepped in, “Director, I have a strange one for you. Are you familiar with one of our new Engineers shipping out on the Dangerous Toys?” He didn’t expect the Director to actually know any of that but it was a shorthand way of kicking off the search. By the time he reached the desk, it would be appearing on the screen.

The Xeno Contact Committee was the central database for humanities travels across the Galaxy. The database ran to millions of names, histories and ships. It also had excellent AI.

‘Engineer Patrica O’Neill. First posting to Dangerous Toys, the third candidate for the Canine Alliance Protocols...trained on the HDF Poseidon Affair, Reserve rank Engineer First-Class. Below minimum recommended size, ranked with an exceptional performance review. Registered for a First-Contact bonus, as yet unfulfilled. Currently on the third month of her contract.’

The Commander collated the information against what was known about the ship. Zero military interests, standard central world design. Xeno built, but nothing unusual. No records of anything except that it had been in space for a hell of a long time before someone paid up for a decent Engineer. The Captain was listed with an ‘Uncontacted Species’ tag. Presumably where the Engineer expected to earn her bonus. He nodded to himself. Clever.

He looked at his Coordinator, “So what has she done? Who do we need to apologise to now?”

He and his staff were proud of their work but it was generally putting out fires started by some Engineer or innocent human crashing heavily into a Xeno culture and breaking stuff. In all his years he had seen things that could make your eyes bleed. Yet the show must go on, even if sometimes it was a show of force. This Galaxy would eat you alive if you let it go all feral and it had taken ages to housetrain it.

The Coordinator smiled, “No this is probably good news but if not we are definitely going to have a very short war. The Captain of Dangerous Toys is from System 30/910/277. Unvisited and we have no trade links. Scent-based communications species, peaceful. Our only record of a name for their world would translate as ‘Flowers Early.’ Sounds nice. The problem we have is that I am getting massive traffic from their governments and private citizens about dogs. They are looking for types, feeding habits, price… they are downloading seventy-terabytes-per-second from the Library ships about Terran Canines and the new protocols. The Librarian thought we should know. Now I have a request for a diplomatic mission from them to Earth itself. Someone important wants to visit.”

The Director leaned back. He had been in this job for twenty years and all the exercise in the world wasn’t going to take away the spread or give him back his hair but these were the moments that had kept him at his desk. What were the Xenos up to now?

“So either they like puppies and we are going to be best friends or they think they are delicious and mankind will squash them like a bug? Allow the diplomatic visit. Then get the Engineer on my screen. Tell the fleet to prepare her papers, just in case I need to pull her back into the HDF. This is her first posting so I’d prefer to leave her in peace but if they have eaten her dog…” He checked the file, “...Loki, then they are already at war with at least one Engineer and we can expect casualties to mount.”

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Dangerous Toys, Engineering

Patrica was elbow-deep in the forward transporters when she was summoned to the Captains Quarters. She checked the time and then the readouts. The ship was where it was supposed to be and nothing was flashing. Her comms told her that Loki was fine, asleep in her cabin so it wasn’t him. She had already explained that Loki hadn’t known that some people had tails around here and it was just a misunderstanding. Loki had apologised. She put down her tools and sealed the room.

The Captain met her with First Officer Wippene. Despite her best efforts he hadn’t given up his suspicion of Loki and now seemed to distrust Humans as well. The Captain had turned out to be a genuine friend. Loki had given him the name *‘/Longnose/’*and regarded him as a pack-mate. “Sir, what’s up? Anything I should be worried about?”

The Captain seemed a little subdued, “Engineer O’Neill, I’m afraid I need to apologise to you. I had been asked by my government to keep them informed of our interactions. We often suffer from problems working with verbal species and that has prevented development on our worlds. In a sense, this was a test for us.” He paused.

Patrica had been tasked with the same thing, she figured everyone was. “Of course, Sir. I’m also expected to update my people if there’s a problem, or if we have found friendlies out here. It’s in my contract.” She shot a glance at the First Officer, who seemed to have memorised it. “Is there an issue?”

The Captain sighed, “Wippene, please go and bring Loki here. It will make things easier.”

The First Officer stiffened. “Sir, perhaps the Engineer could fetch the creature…”

The Captain simply waved him out the door. “I suspect you had better get used to Canines around here.”

“Patrica, what I need to apologise for is that I neglected to fulfil that request. I so enjoyed my time with Loki and our little walks about the ship that I filled my reports with those events. In my defence, my people have now become obsessed with your dog. Loki is quite a star right now. Currently, he is more popular than our leadership and my little recordings are the most popular media in the system. Our government has requested a diplomatic visit to Earth to discuss obtaining dogs for ourselves.” He waved his hands in the air, “I never thought Loki would attract this much interest! But you must understand, our people are lonely in this Galaxy of trillions of noisy creatures and you have brought us one that we can talk to! Your XCC is waiting to speak to you about the whole thing.”

Loki came bounding into the room ‘/Mine/Longnose/Walkies/treats?/ and Patrica had to laugh. “Captain, I can’t blame you for falling for our furry friends. What can I do to help?”

The Captain seemed surprised, “You do not object? You have bred these animals for millennia. They have served you, walked with you into space and you would share that with others?”

“As you say Captain we have walked with them every step of the way. We will guard them as fiercely as you can imagine. Ill-treatment, neglect or abuse will be answered with outrage as has always been true on Earth but they have a voice in this. It’s a Canine Alliance remember.” She rubbed Lokis head fondly, “If they will bond with you and you follow the rules I see no reason why your people can’t join in.”

She looked at Loki, ‘/Puppies for Longnose?/New pack?/’ Loki sniffed, /Longnoses/big pack/’ She smiled at the Captain, “I think he agrees.”

The Director ended the call with Engineer Patrica O’Neill. He was still grinning when he checked the box for ‘First-contact bonus’ on his paperwork. She had just created a brand new trade and that carried an entirely different kind of bonus. It hadn’t occurred to anyone that the Galaxy didn’t have dogs, not like Earth did. Already a horde of trainers, breeders and animal-welfare experts were rushing to meet this new species. She had welded this race as an ally of humanity in a single day. There would be others. He thought about that for a moment, and asked the AI “I need to know if we have anyone out there that would like a cat?”

The Library ship had been heading that way anyway and was happy to help. It hailed the Dangerous Toys and asked for a short visit. The Captain was surprised, although he knew that the humans had become the major source of ships and crew for the Libraries. Indeed it was a human that met them at the entry port. The human smiled, “Captain /Longnose?/ I have been asked to give you this. I believe you have someone on-board that can help. With the compliments of the XCC.” He handed the Captain the cage and returned to his ship.

The Basset-Hound huffed at him,’ /New Pack!/Loki?/’ The Captain smiled and inhaled deeply, ‘/Longnose/Loki/New pack/ Love/Welcome/New Forever Home/’

/Treats!?/