The enchanter massaged his temples while resting his elbows on the desk of the archchancellor. His short brown hair was slightly disheveled, his lean body clothed in a stylish but wrinkled robe. His face looked harried since he hadn’t slept a full night for weeks.
His superior stroked his beard to hide his smile. “Let me sum that up. Several female adventurers have asked… or more like insisted… you to enchant chainmail armor to be partially invisible, leaving visible the… let’s say, more intimate parts. They have no regard to the complexity of this endeavor. Problems include chainmail being already hard to enchant, since it consists of thousands of individual parts. Which only makes it harder to exclude certain areas. Then you have to include the undergarments, which your customers seem to forget all the time. It should also not seem like floating more than a fingers width above the skin, as it would be if an invisible gambeson of standard thickness is worn below. And two of them have tried to seduce you to reduce the price.”
The enchanter nodded weakly. “I even directly told the last revenant I’d rather work for one of her handsome male warrior friends, but she just thought I’d prefer to enchant male armor since it is easier. As if…”
The archchancellor leaned back in his leather armchair and contemplated the problem for a while, breaking it up into solvable steps. “It won’t work using standard chainmail. Your customers will have to commission a custom-made version with different alloyed rings used for the visible parts. I would recommend including nickel for the visible parts to make them even more shiny. Maybe even some alchemical silver, if they can afford it. You will also require them to commission a much thinner undergarment, woven through with thin mythril wire. Much of the enchantment will be needed to be placed on the undergarment. Comfort, sweat removal, temperature adjustment, self-cleaning, self-repairing. All targeted at the undergarment as well as the chainmail above, which needs to be primed to receive the effect. The chainmail itself will only take the invisibility enchantment, unless they can afford a twenty percent mythril alloy. And they’d have to provide the mythril themselves, since there is none to be found on the open market these days. Don’t forget to set an appropriate price for this ‘Chainmail Bikini’. If there are any complains, direct them to me. Will that suffice to solve your problem?”
The enchanter thought a moment, then nodded. He lifted himself up, thanked the archchancellor and left. Before the door to his office could close, his secretarius looked inside: “Shall I send in the next one?”
Archchancellor Kosmaran sighed and nodded. He knew there was a long queue of people waiting outside.
* * *
While the street outside was busy, the apothecary’s insides were empty of customers while the city guard blocked the entrance and searched the inside of the apothecary. The leading guardsman looked up from his notebook he was using to take the testimony of the owner: “So, some time after your suspicious customer left, some of your inventory just disappeared. Did it fade or dissolve? Some kind of flash? Was there any sparkling?”
The old man’s voice was still hoarse from screaming bloody murder after realizing he’d been robbed. “Quick fading, no sparkling. I have no idea how he’s done that. Maybe put up some teleportation trackers?”
The guardsman shook his head: “No, that would create a flash of light and teleportation spells are still extremely rare, thank the gods for small mercies. What you describe is someone using a level 3 illusion spell to create the illusion of your existing shop. Then he or an invisible accomplice stole everything without you realizing while he distracted you. Sometime later the illusion dissolved and the missing items became noticeable.”
“Should I give you a description of the perpetrator?”
“Won’t do any good. If he’s that good with illusion magic, he will have changed his face and voice as well.”
“How will you find him then? He stole a dozen jars of alchemical ingredients and the healing potion from the exhibition showcase!”
The guardsman grinned and nodded to the door, where another guard just entered leading a black-haired dog on a leash. “They always forget to mask their scent. We've already caught three thieves today. In a few days, word will have gotten around and they'll find a way to avoid tracking dogs. By then, though, hopefully the Baron's court magician will have created enough warning artifacts to sound the alarm when illusion or invisibility magic is used. We are already distributing the finished artefacts throughout the city, but we haven’t reached all of the crucial shops yet.”
The tale has been illicitly lifted; should you spot it on Amazon, report the violation.
The dog walked around the shop sniffing, then started to growl. The guardsman grinned: “He already knows that scent. It’s a repeat offender. Probably the same that stole ration bars from a market stall this morning.” His grin faded: “We’re still able to uphold the law, but the revenants are levelling fast. Soon they will have spells and feats we can’t match.”
The shopkeeper shrugged: “We’ll just offer rewards and quests. Let them police themselves.”
“It’s not that easy. Few revenants have builds suitable for detective work. Even fewer are interested in hunting criminals. At least Pallandur still pays for any quest rewards regarding those kinds of quests. Without the god of quests' help, the city would already be broke just from paying out rewards.”
* * *
The little bell over the door chimed as a burly man, looking both confused and slightly singed, entered stepped into magic shop on the ground floor of the Mage Academy, carrying a large, round shield. Dust motes floated through the sunlight streaming from a grimy window, illuminating the tall shelves crammed with vials, ancient scrolls, and all kinds of peculiar objects.
"Welcome to The Arcane Attic!" said Roland, the shop's proprietor and senior mage consultant. He peered over his spectacles, scrutinizing the nervous figure. Beside him, Aldric, his apprentice, glanced up from a book titled ‘Practical Hex Troubleshooting for the Overworked Wizard’.
Roland crossed his arms. “And what brings you to our fine establishment today?”
The man set the shield down with a loud thud. “I bought this shield for, you know, protection,” he grumbled. “But it’s been… acting strange.”
Roland and Aldric exchanged a look, then turned back to the man. “Strange how?” asked Aldric, feigning innocence.
“Well, it hums. Sometimes it gets hot, sometimes it just… flashes with light for no reason,” the man explained, scratching his head. “And yesterday, when an arrow came at me, it just kind of… turned itself away.”
Aldric raised an eyebrow. “It moved itself, you say?”
“Aye. Instead of moving to intercept the arrow, as it should do. I don’t think I can count on it when I’m in the middle of a fight.”
Roland nodded knowingly. “Classic case of ‘too many charms, not enough foresight.’ Let me guess: You bought it from another revenant that told you it was ‘guaranteed to protect you from anything and everything’?”
The man gave a sheepish nod. “Said it had every protection charm he knew of.”
“Every one, huh?” Aldric shook his head, chuckling darkly. “That’s not protection. That’s a hazard waiting to happen.”
Roland gestured for Aldric to help him flip the shield over. He traced his finger over a set of metal discs, each with a tiny jewel in the middle, surrounded by runes. He parsed them squinting. “Yup, just as I suspected. It’s got overlapping defense spells—anti-bludgeon, anti-pierce, elemental resistance, durability… and a shield block assistance spell, based on a Hand of the Apprentice spell variant.’”
The man’s face fell. “What’s wrong with that?”
Roland held up a finger, tapping the shield. “See, charms like these aren’t meant to overlap. They’re clashing. So, instead of reinforcing each other, they’re… arguing. The shield doesn’t know whether to be fireproof, shockproof, or just move out of the way when things get rough.”
Aldric grinned, inspecting the rune work. “This is amateur hour. They’ve got these set up in layers, one trying to override the next. Look here…” he pointed to a faint scorch mark near the handle, “I’d wager this part got hot during an attack because it couldn’t decide whether to deflect, absorb, or just dodge altogether.”
The man blinked, lost. “So… can it be fixed?”
“We can stabilize it,” Roland replied, rolling up his sleeves. “But we’re going to have to strip it down. I’ll leave you with a basic anti-bludgeon and some elemental resistance. No more auto-movement.”
“Let’s get to it,” Aldric said, already taking out a wand. “First things first. Have you tried turning all enchantments off and on again?”
The man looked blank. Roland chuckled. “Means we’ll dispel everything, then reapply only what’s useful. Watch.”
With a flick of his wrist, Roland muttered a disenchantment spell. The shield dimmed, the shimmering layer around it disappearing. He waited a moment to let it settle, then tapped the shield with his wand several times while casting. The tiny shimmer reappeared in some of the jewels, while others burned out and turned to dust. Enchantments on the desk flared up while they neutralized the released mana and prevented elemental discharges and explosions.
“Now, that should work much better,” Roland said, handing the shield back. “It’ll protect you from blunt force and offer basic fire resistance. No more overheating, flashing, or trying to hide.”
The man took the shield, testing its weight. “Just… a regular, solid shield?”
“Exactly,” Aldric replied with a smirk. “And this time, it’ll act like one.”
As the customer left, Roland sighed, returning to his counter. “You’d think these revenant enchanters would learn.”
Aldric chuckled. “They never take the time to learn the theoretical foundations of enchantments. Next time, I bet it’ll be a sword that thinks it’s a torch.”
Roland laughed, patting Aldric on the shoulder. “And we’ll be ready to turn it off and on again.”