The hard, slippery wet slope beginning to form underneath me made a large crunching sound, causing both guards to look up. Their eyes were as wide as saucers. A wild gust of wind blew my hood back, causing my hair to fall over my eyes. When I landed on the lawn, crouched down on one knee, they dropped their umbrellas in shock. For the first time in a while, they made eye contact with me.
I waved at them. "Na wè pita perdants!”
One of the men stared at the giant ice block that led to my bedroom window. “Kòman ou oze—”
He didn’t get to finish his sentence. I took off sprinting around the building, mud clinging to my wet jeans. Both men started to chase me, but I couldn’t help but laugh at how slow and clumsy they were. I had chosen the perfect night, when security was at its weakest. Their heavy breaths and footsteps fell into rhythm as I made my way through the soggy grass.
“Stop! We’re not doing this again!” the guard shouted. “Get over here. Now!”
I held out my right hand as I approached the doors of the gate and concentrated. The rain in front of me floated into small, transparent blobs, forming sharp shards of ice. The pain in my head was beginning to arrive, but I wasn’t allowing it to ruin things now. I clenched my jaw and swung my hand forward, causing the shards to slam against the doors and open them. They broke apart in a million pieces and piled up on the ground.
“Get back here!”
I turned around and faced them. The men were barely halfway through the yard, panting and wheezing like dogs. Their umbrellas had been blown into the bushes, and even in the dim light I could make out how red and puffy their faces were. The street was empty now. When I stepped on that soaking wet asphalt and felt the smooth, cold surface of ice beginning to form under my bare feet, I wasn’t able to stop laughing before taking off.
They had underestimated me, the fools.
Thunder rumbled in the distance as the rain began to pour harder. I breathed in the scent of gas, cigarette smoke, and garbage as I slid past the closing restaurants and businesses. The neon lights of nightclubs and casinos were beginning to turn on.
For the first time in ages I could breathe, and I felt that I could soar. Everyone walking on the sidewalks seemed to be a blur, and the sensation of rain on my face was rewarding.
“YEAHHHHHHHH!”
My voice echoed off the walls of buildings and mixed in with the honking of cars coming in the opposite lanes that swerved to avoid me. Tires squealed against the wet pavement as a large truck collided with a minivan, causing glass to shatter. A large slope rose from the ground as I felt myself flying in the air over both, feeling the wind blow against my face as I completed a flip. My heels slammed against the hood of one of the vehicles, leaving a dent behind.
I held both of my arms out and spread my feet further apart, letting the ice carry me down the road. The rain felt great in my hair as I slid down backwards temporarily, the long ice trail marking my path behind me.
Curves and corners were making it a little bit harder to control my speed, causing water and slush to splash around my ankles. After ten minutes I couldn’t feel my feet anymore because they were so numb, but I didn’t care. In the corner of my eye, there were several black cars with a red snake painted on it not driving not too far away. I bit my lower lip and sighed.
Ah, shit, here we go again.
Two bright yellow headlights from an oncoming truck met my eyes. I panicked. My right leg slipped, and I skidded straight into an abandoned alley, off the main road. Before I knew it, a row of metal trash cans had appeared out of nowhere, and I was lying on my back on the ground, staring up at the sky.
Old newspapers and food wrappers surrounded me as I struggled to sit up. The world wouldn’t stop spinning in front of me. The metallic taste of blood coated my tounge, and when I touched my nose my fingers were covered in it.
In the distance, at the end of the alley, there was a blocked off fence, next to a wall full of graffiti. Faint screams and gunshots filled my ears. I got to my feet and stumbled over towards it in the darkness. Two large trucks that had wooden cages in the back of it were crammed with people, who were fighting and banging on the door. A couple of Red Mamba soldiers stood nearby, their rifles pointed at them. I held my breath.
What are they doing?
“Adlai!”
The sharp voice made me jump as I spun around, tearing my eyes away from the scene. Right nearby the spilled trashcans appeared not two, but five guards, their cars neatly parked by the sidewalk. Not too far from them stood an innocent crowd of bystanders, watching us.
Lightning forked across the sky, revealing their angry faces. My head was on fire, so I knew I was burnt out. I started to hoist myself over the fence, but they were too quick, pulling me away by my sweatshirt with both of their hands.
I struggled and kicked, but it was no use.
* * * * * *
“What is the matter with you?”
Baldwin’s voice bounced off the walls in his office. It was around one in the morning when he had gotten the call from his staff, who were nothing but snitches. He had been screaming at me for so long I was sure his vocal cords were shredded by now. All of this only made my throbbing head worse. His face was as red as a tomato, and dark circles settled underneath his tired blue eyes. I was barely listening to what he was saying anyways, propping my muddy bare feet on his clean table, which he had the maids wipe down three times in one day.
“You act like a child. I had to drive down from my house, leaving my dog behind at this hour because you decided to act up. Nothing I sent for your birthday could satisfy you. Out of all the things you’ve done, this is probably by far the stupidest. First you freeze all the doorknobs in the building overnight so that nobody could open a single door. You keep dousing my staff with water, and just last week you froze the entire floor. Show some decency and put on your shoes. No one wants to see your raggedy toes. My office is not your bedroom. And what happened to your face?”
I yanked my hood over my head, trying to hide a smile. “I wasn’t gone for long.”
“You think this is funny?”
”Just calm down.”
“Calm down?!” His voice reached a higher pitch. “Don’t you ever tell me to do anything, you hear me? Show some respect. What you did was dangerous and unacceptable. Do you know how many accidents you’ve caused? Five. Five! And now I have to worry about paying for damages and insurance.”
I shrugged. “You told me no one got hurt.”
“You have a lot to say for someone who’s never had a job before.”
”Well, maybe if you’d let me—”
“I don’t know how many times I have to keep saying this. If you want to go out, just let the guards know. You’re pathetic.”
“Please. You know how often I tried that? They don’t like me, they hate being around me.”
”Hmm, that’s odd. And you have no clue why they do, Adlai? None whatsoever?”
I looked down. “L-look. I know I haven’t been the best person in the whole world, but I…I don’t mean to hurt them. Really, I…I just…” A weak smile fell on my face. “I’ve always wanted to be their friend. They ignore me, don’t even give me a chance to talk to them. So I’m going to find a place where others will—“
”There is no such place. None for you. You can barely handle the workers who are paid to be around you. Maybe if you cleaned up your act and you know, tried to act like the adult you are supposed to be for once, you may be liked a little better around here.”
”Well, I was only seventeen yesterday.”
”That’s not the point.”
I slightly chuckled.
”Care to explain what is so amusing? You cry and whine, eat all of the food we have, waste it, and then hide in your room. You’re an embarrassment to society, to the tax payers. A pig. Look at how much weight you have gained; it’s disgusting. All you do is eat and sleep, so you’re completely out of shape. I know you’ve been skipping your training sessions, but now I am stepping my foot down on it. You’re not doing what you’re supposed to do and getting rewarded for it. For creating nothing but an absolute mess. And you, amongst the privileged, are asking for more? While those beneath you can barely afford to put food on the table? Why can’t you just be grateful for what you have?”
I didn’t look at him.
”If my parents had to deal with you, they—” A faraway look came on his face, and he suddenly remained silent in the middle of his sentence. “If my parents—”
”If they what?” I mumbled.
“Never mind.” Baldwin slammed his hands on the surface of the table and rolled his eyes. “I’m just going to say it to you the nicest way I know how. People out there are dangerous, son. You could’ve been shot by a gang member or kidnapped. Have you not learned your lesson? You are to stay here, and if you leave, you do so with supervision. Those are the rules.”
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”Forget the rules,” I murmured.
Baldwin glared at me. “Ou vle dezòd avèm?”
I stared at the carpet for a moment, before standing up and crumpling up the bloodied napkin that I used to wipe my nose with in my hand. “I can’t have any fun.”
He didn’t reply.
“It’s true, isn’t it? I mean, I do nothing take tests all the time. Same old thing. And...and you’ve been saying that I can’t handle myself so far. I mean, I can do whatever I want. I...” My voice trailed off. “I didn’t mean any trouble. Honest; I won’t do it again. I promise.”
”Yeah, we’ll see what you’ll do next week.”
”I mean it.”
Baldwin was silent for a moment, the only sound in the room involving the ticking of the clock. “You are concerned about having fun? My men were driving ninety miles per hour to catch up with you ice surfing on a public road. They were in a car. A machine.”
I sighed.
“Do you know what would’ve happen if you’ve fallen in front of traffic? C’mon, you know better. At that speed? Barefoot?” He glanced at the table. “I’m surprised the bottom of your feet aren’t ripped off.”
“But it’s fun. You go faster that way, since the ice is more slippery.”
”Then you fall down and crack your skull? And then you become paralyzed from the neck down, and you wouldn’t be able to do a thing for yourself. And we’ll have to get your meals down through a feeding tube. Yes, that sounds amusing.” A disgusted tone rose in his voice. “Or fun, as you like to put it.”
I bit my lower lip.
”Who’s laughing now? And stop harassing my staff. They don’t like these games you keep playing.”
”Harrassing them? Who even said that I was—“
He gave me a stern look. “Enough with the lies already. That’s the fourth time this month that you went off and did something this absurd. I’ve been so busy I hadn’t paid much attention to the concerns of the staff members, but this is the last straw. There’s going to be new restrictions, maybe withholding certain privileges for a week. You get smart with one of my employees—I don’t care how minor it is—it’s over.”
“What?!" My face turned red. “You can’t do that! This isn’t even a big deal.”
”And I’m boarding up that window! I don’t want you hurting anybody. You busted up your nose and you’re bleeding out all over my table. You’re a danger to yourself, for crying out loud. And watch your mouth. Who do you think you’re talking to, anyways?”
“But—“
“Adlai, I’m not arguing with you anymore. I’m exhausted. I have to be up in a few hours anyway, so I’d really like to go home myself. This conversation is over. Now go to your room.”
“No, it’s not,” I fired back. “You’re just overreacting. I want to meet someone. I don’t care what they look like or where they’re from. I mean, please, can’t you let me hang out in the streets for one day and just...just you know... let me see someone? Just so I can talk to them…so we can be friends.” I released a shaky breath.
”Go to your room—“
”Please.”
To my surprise, the last word came out all loud and my eyes were burning up. I quickly blinked before he noticed. There was something strange about Baldwin’s face. It was as blank as a piece of paper. I didn’t know if it was because he was just tired, or he was fed up with my bullshit.
Probably both.
”You don’t need to focus on friends, Adlai. You are indebted towards service to Plod.”
“I-I understand that, but…”
“But what?”
“I’m so alone,” I whispered.
“Alone from what? Temptations? Betrayals? The strongest people are often alone. People are distractions, things that make you stumble. They are the very cause of your downfall. Hard work and discipline are your friends. You remember the last time you tried to make friends in the outside world, don’t you?” he asked. “Remember the Kaver incident? Don’t let your emotions get in the way of your reasoning. It’s pathetic, because you do things like this. We need to get rid of this mentality, especially before you join the army. If you want to talk to someone, I can always call the psychiatrist, but you need to control yourself. Rely on no one. Trust no one but yourself.”
That’s not what I mean, and you know it, I wanted to say.
“Do you understand me? And tomorrow afternoon, you’re taking care of that massive ice mass in front of your window.”
I looked away and shoved my hands deep in my pockets. I didn’t want to answer. I couldn’t. Baldwin came around the table, glaring at me.
“Safety first,” he said. “Safety is always first. You can’t trust people. You know why? Because people will use you. That’s why you are here. We care about you.” He changed his tone. “We don’t want what happened to your mother to happen to you.”
“No, sir,” I whispered. That strange pain in my chest was coming back, a deep disappointment, but I refused to expose myself in front of him. This day felt more like a fever dream than a birthday. “I’m sorry. It won’t happen again.”
A small, relieved smile spread across his face. “Why don’t you get some rest, okay? Training starts earlier tomorrow morning. Sergeant Davis is trying to teach you about punctuality, since you’re been sleeping a much more later than usual. This getting up at noon won’t cut it. That’s not good either.”
I was already walking across the room. “Fine.”
“And, Adlai?”
My hand hovered over the brass doorknob.
“Happy birthday. Besides the dangerous incident that occurred tonight, I still hoped you liked the gifts. I hope you had a nice day.”
For some reason, I wanted to pick up a chair and throw it at him. It was like he was pushing my buttons or something. Instead, I gave him a little nod, stepped out his office, and headed to my suite, slamming the door as hard as I could so that it echoed in the hallway. The cake was still sitting there on the desk. I threw it in the trash and flopped on top of my bed, ignoring the creaky noise of the mattress. From a crack in a wall, bugs were crawling outwards.
I stared at them from behind my hair.
* * * * * * *
I still woke up two hours late and Sergeant Davis made me run an extra three miles. It wasn’t that bad, though, since I was able to get away from his nagging tone. In the distance, on the very far end of the field, soldiers were flapping their arms wildly in the air, mucus and saliva spilling from their faces. Their drill sergeants screamed some expletives at them as they struggled to walk in line. When I asked Davis why they looked like they about to die, he explained that it was OC exposure.
“What’s that?”
“They sit in an air polluted room for five minutes without a gas mask. It’s meant to prepare new recruits for entering gassed zones. In this instance, it’s tear gas. Don’t worry, it wears off. You’ll learn about it as a recruit.”
I didn’t ask anything else; it looked painful enough. He took me to a shed full of guns and ammunition and handed me a rifle, and without a word, lead me into a shooting zone. Red and white targets hung from the distance, and I knew what he was asking for me to do before he opened his mouth. I sucked at this drill, and I felt he was getting a kick seeing how bad my aim was. But of course I wasn’t gonna tell him that.
With both arms, I hoisted myself up the branches on a nearby tree, causing the leaves to shake and break off, fluttering to the ground. My shoes dug into the bark as Davis stood at the bottom, looking up at me with his hands on his hips. He looked a lot less intimidating from this angle.
“Hurry up, Bueler!” His voice echoed in the woods. “The enemy won’t wait for you, move it!”
I was gasping for air as I finally reached the upper branches, seeing the other tops of the trees in the distance. Looking down made my stomach queasy as I loaded the rifle, my fingers shaking with the ammo. The targets were miles away, and as I squinted my eyes to see them, I started to feel sick. If I missed all three, I would have to climb all the way down and start again, and I didn’t have the energy for that.
Slowly, I exhaled.
I remembered when I was real little, before Mom and I moved to the beach, we lived in a worn down halfway house. I barely remembered the street sign, but we used to go out to pick mangoes. She was the one who had taught me to climb for the very best ones, since the squishy ones were usually at the bottom. We’d sit on the very top and feast, the sweet juice trailing down our skin and making our cheeks sticky. It was rewarding to see an amazing view after struggling to get up that tree, and I would tell her so, that the people looked like ants.
She would laugh and say, Nothing can escape your view once you reach the top. All your problems shrink.
“Bueler!”
Davis’ voice made me jump, and I pulled on the trigger, the rifle jerking backwards, hitting my shoulder. A loud popping noise echoed in the air as one of the targets collapsed forward. The pain was so bad that the firearm slipped out of my hands and tumbled to the ground, where it split in half. I anxiously peered over the edge of the leaves, holding onto the branches as tight as I could. Served me right for daydreaming.
“Sorry!” I yelled. “I got whiplashed.”
Davis didn’t even look mad. “That’s one down.”
* * * * *
When I stood in front of my bedroom window outside with a large bag of salt, a huge puddle had gathered on the ground, where the ice used to be. The sun had done most of the work for me; I was surprised Baldwin didn’t notice. To my relief, I turned to go inside when something caught my eye.
Right in front the gate, several large trucks holding cages, the exact same I had seen yesterday, came driving by, kicking by a lot of dust in the air. Citizens were standing by the sidewalks, yelling and hurling things at the vehicles. Red Mamba soldiers stood in front of the crowds, trying to hold them back with their guns.
Behind the wired cages were full of dirty people in rags, all squeezed together so that they could barely move. Their eyes were wide, terrified as the stones struck their exposed arms and limbs that were sticking out between the spaces. None of them were wearing a Red Mamba symbol on their arms, which I found odd.
And then, like that, the trucks were gone, leaving nothing but dust in the air and the angry screams of the Jovan citizens. I stood there for a moment, wondering if I should asked the guards about it, but they were probably fed up with me.
As I entered the building and closed the door, Baldwin came walking quickly down the hallway, his eyes full of panic. I heard voices coming from his office, so I assumed one of his meetings weren’t over yet.
“Oh good, you’re back early,” he said.
”What’s going on?”
He hesitated for a moment, then fumbled in his suit pocket before pulling out an envelope. “When you see Sergeant Davis tomorrow, can you please give this to him? It’s urgent. And do not open it. It has nothing to concern you.”
“Why?” I asked.
He opened his mouth to say something, but shouts erupted from his office, which he kept glancing back towards. “Just do what I say, Adlai. And take care of that ice.”
I was getting ready to tell him that there was nothing there, but he had already hurried back done the hallway, closing his office door with a loud bang. The staff looked up for a moment, and continued working as the noise ensued. I sauntered back to my room, chills traveling down my spine. The look of the people on the truck outside had startled me. Nobody was telling me anything, and I was desperate to know why.
I glanced at the boarded up window and sighed. The nails were sticking out of the wall. At least Baldwin had done a shitty job with it. I needed to find a hammer or something to pry them off so I could see what was going on outside. Now I’d have to walk to the front windows of the building to do that, and that was no fun.
I slowly slid down the wall on my behind, hugging my knees, breathing heavily. The silence made nauseous, like I wanted to throw up, and that familiar pain in my chest was coming back. A sloshing sound came from my bathroom, and water seeped out on the carpet floor.
I didn’t get up.