Chapter 99 - A Duo’s Quiet Journey
Sentience, wisdom and knowledge, these were the three components of the mind which formed a person’s intelligence as a whole.
Sentience was the power of the consciousness. When people referred to mental resilience and strength, they were generally talking about the power of a person’s sentience.
Wisdom referred to the innate rational understanding over things. It was gradually developed throughout life.
Knowledge was a person’s accumulated memories. It existed as information stored within the mind.
By tearing out a portion of his real mind which existed outside of the illusion, and bringing it into the illusion, Yaan aimed to immerse his entire mind in the illusion.
Whilst his consciousness was submerged in the illusion world already, that did not mean that his entire mind was present. When Yaan first entered the illusion, he only had access to just over half of his sentience and a portion of his wisdom, whilst his knowledge was almost entirely missing.
Rui fell into thought and became silent as Yaan recovered. She offered him various healing methods, but he declined them all.
Yaan didn’t explain his reasoning to her. He didn’t explain that even now, he didn’t want to embrace the ways of the cultivation world within this illusion.
Rui pondered his choice silently. His actions allowed her to correctly guess a portion of his thoughts, but her deductions were not entirely correct. She believed that he was still chasing his self-created path, the path which existed in opposition to the path he had taken in the past.
But Yaan was no longer obsessing over this. After gathering more of his memories by absorbing those fragments of knowledge, Yaan remembered most of everything that had transpired ever since he entered the 4th trial.
It seemed that in dragging out those memories and attracting the worst of the poisons afflicting his mind, he regained his ‘strongest’ memories, meaning those fragments of knowledge which were most firmly rooted in his mind. This mostly consisted of his most recent memories. His mind had grown much stronger since entering the 4th Trial Realm, but older memories were naturally weaker regardless.
Over long periods of time, memories would fade. Older fragments of knowledge would only become weaker as time passed by.
Yaan’s eye lids drooped and he forced himself to carry on. Rui stared at him, before rolling her eyes and casually tapping the back of his head. A white light spread out, knocking him unconscious.
She actually had no malicious intentions this time, she only knocked Yaan out because he was being tediously obstinate. Although she understood his reasoning now, but that was why it had to be this way.
Whilst he was unconscious, Rui started to treat his injuries. Since she had acted against him, and this was not Yaan’s own choice, it couldn’t be said that he was returning to the ways of cultivation.
Actually, he was close to dying from dehydration, whilst the nearest stream was 11 miles away. Without Rui’s assistance, his chances didn’t look good.
For an unknown reason, Rui actually honoured Yaan’s wishes. She used natural resources to treat his injuries and to help him recover, having collected these things from the surroundings during their journey, without Yaan noticing.
It was strange that this Rui, a weakened soul, was able to collect and store physical items from the surroundings. That said, Yaan had never really properly understood Rui’s abilities.
Yaan slept for two and a half days straight. When he awoke, Rui provided him with normal water, mortal fruits and some poorly cooked insects. She was clearly not accustomed to cooking like a mortal; it had been too long since she last needed to do something like this. At least it was good enough that Yaan didn’t get food poisoning.
He ate and drank ravenously, then once he had finished, he clasped his hands together and thanked her.
He understood that since Rui had prepared this feast for him, going so far as to cook the meal using felled ordinary tress branches, she was accepting his desire to stay away from cultivation, for whatever reason.
They continued walking in silence. Rui was surprised that Yaan didn’t ask her a single question, even after a full day.
Really though, he already knew what she would and wouldn’t answer…there were indeed certain things that he wanted to ask, only, he didn’t trust her enough to voice these queries out loud. And so, he remained silent.
Ever since he dragged that portion of his mind into the illusion, Yaan regained some memories, but his intelligence as a whole had also improved.
Gradually, his uncertain feelings towards Rui began to fade away as he mentally suppressed them, turning his emotions into a cautious indifference. He could still feel some lingering melancholy in his heart, however…
This was troublesome.
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Rui was a scheming woman, if he wanted to avoid falling into a trap, then he needed to stay on guard. Emotions would get in his way, but if he wanted to suppress his emotions entirely, then he would need to regain more of his intelligence.
Regaining his wisdom and memories would also influence Yaan’s mental and emotional state. It was possible that by the time he recovered his entire mind, his melancholic emotional state would vanish by itself.
“You’re planning to drag more of your mind into this illusion.” Rui stated bluntly after some time, glancing down at him as Yaan nodded.
“How much?”
“All of it.”
“You really are stupid.” She rolled her eyes. “What do you think will happen to your original body if it completely loses its entire mind?”
“Huh?” Yaan was startled. “You mean it would be dangerous? But this is just an illusion, it’s not like-”
“And what is an illusion, exactly?”
Yaan became silent. Despite being a supposed prodigy in the so-called ‘dao of illusions’, he could not find a single satisfactory answer to this question. If it were anyone else asking, he might have more confidence that he could answer adequately, but this was Rui…
Yaan knew that Rui’s dao comprehension surpassed his own by an incomparable margin. Rui may be vicious and scheming, but she was undoubtedly experienced, understanding this world on a much deeper level compared to himself. So, towards her question, there was only one answer.
“I don’t know. Do you?”
“I know more than you…but dao is infinitely deep, complex beyond comprehension, yet so simple that it’s like a single drop of water…”
‘“Uh…alright then.” Yaan felt like she was just avoiding the question, so he coughed and returned to the key issue here. “How much of my mind should I bring out so that I can survive?”
“All but the minimum. Leave a trace of your sentience, an equally light fragment of knowledge which can act as a memory anchor, and the same amount of wisdom to sustain the fabric of your real mind. Be very careful when you do this, there’s a high chance that you could permanently damage your mind.”
Yaan nodded slowly.
A few seconds later, he pushed his hands forth with a ferocious expression, before aggressively pulling out yet another massive portion of his mind!
Rui stared at him speechlessly. She had to wonder if he was deliberately being as crazy as possible whilst ignoring her warning about being cautious.
Honestly, Yaan felt more caution towards Rui than he did towards his present actions. Even if this Rui was only an illusion, he still felt a faint sense of danger whenever she looked at him.
This time, Yaan was in a much better state, since he understood exactly what he needed to do. He managed to pull out the remaining traces of the 1-Star astral spirits, as well as the lingering mist of power left behind by the Calamity of Insanity Pill, and the tens of various poisons which continued to afflict him in the outside world.
For the most part, the astral spirits aimed for his memories. The poisons affected all components of his mind, but the majority seeped into the part of the mind which existed in the background; his wisdom. The lingering power from the Calamity of Insanity Pill only seemed to assault the walls of sentience, which were responsible for holding his mind together.
Yaan ignored the poisons and the lingering power from the Calamity of Insanity Pill, but the astral spirits were different. The astral spirits were trying to tear apart his very memories!
When sentience and wisdom was torn down, it could be built back up stronger than before, but broken memories could not be recovered, they could only be replaced with new memories.
They continue walking, even as Yaan grimaced. Naturally, Rui could understand why he was making this expression - after all, she had seen everything that he pulled into his mind from the outside world.
“So I understand drawing in the Calamity of Insanity Pill’s power and the poisons which are afflicting your mind in the outside world, since this could help to temper your wisdom and sentience…but astral spirits? What do you hope to achieve by drawing in astral spirits into your illusory mind?”
“Haha…” Yaan chuckled. “You don’t cultivate Psyche Power, do you Rui? Well, it’s not common, it’s already amazing that you understand it so well…but you can only truly understand the difficulty of stepping into the first realm of the mind by attempting it yourself…”
Just because Rui was intelligent, did not mean that she cultivated Psyche Power. Any cultivator of any path would become more intelligent as they progressed, even though the mind was not their main focus. All four paths strengthened all four aspects, this could be seen from how Qi refiners eventually transformed their Mortal Soul into an Origin Soul.
Rui’s eyes lit up and she immediately asked:
“You’re using pain to cultivate your mind?”
“Right.” Yaan nodded lightly.
“Hmm…” Rui didn’t critique him for this insane method. As a notorious demon herself, she understood that demons must be ruthless to themselves if they wanted to get anywhere in this world.
They continued walking. Rui gathered food and water without much effort, allowing Yaan to stay in more or less good health.
A month passed by. As they continued to walk in this seemingly random direction, the trees and atmosphere were becoming increasingly dark and gloomy.
“Dark forest…” Yaan muttered. “In the end, I still came back…”
He felt dazed, because he had not been monitoring the direction they were travelling. To think that after walking randomly for so long, he would end up travelling back towards this place…
Over the past month, Rui became increasingly certain that Yaan was telling the truth; this world was an illusion created by a stupidly powerful formation. And yet, she didn’t seem at all perturbed by this fact. This seriously confused Yaan, filling him with all sorts of doubts.
“The difference between reality and illusion isn’t as far as you might think.” Rui answered when he asked her about this matter.
Yaan paused, then nodded. He knew that what she said was true, after all, didn’t he create illusions whilst practising his sword arts, illusions which were real enough to maim and kill his enemies? Could those illusions really be considered ‘fake’…?
But then, what about an illusion like this, an illusion countless times more shocking than the small playthings which he could produce?
“When I leave this illusion, what will happen to you?” Yaan suddenly turned towards Rui and asked.
“I’m not sure. But I’ll find that answer once our journey ends. As for you…well, just try to remain calm. Don’t do anything so crazy that you ruin everything that you’ve worked for.”
Her expression was cold, but her words were almost caring…
Yaan was dazed, both by her bizarre answer, and by the fact that she seemed to be showing care towards him. He couldn’t find a single reason for her to act this way.
‘Rui, caring about me? She must have something to gain from my survival…no, it’s not just my survival. Why is she following me, going along with all of my whims? Strange, too strange…’
No matter how he thought about it, he was unable to make sense of Rui’s actions.
As they traveled, Yaan felt increasingly dazed and confused, but not because of Rui.
He tore out a fragment of his own mind once every ten days. Ten days was approximately the period of time that he needed to recover naturally, and ready himself for another round.
Six months flew by. Today, the duo were having an unusually personal conversation. That said, they weren’t just trying to get to know one another better.
Yaan realised that he had a chance in this illusion. He had encountered many things since he last spoke to Rui on Heavenly Path Mountain, but he was still unable to awaken her soul. Of course, even if he had the ability to do so, would he dare, knowing that she intended to use him as a medicine for her recovery?
No, he would not, not until he could be certain that he had the ability to protect himself from her. But in this illusion, that worry was non-existent.
“So you found this inheritance a few hundreds miles South of here? A massive inheritance opening once every ten years…from 1,800 years ago…and with a focus on the body tempering side of the Fiend Transformation Technique…” Rui looked slightly dazed for a moment.
Yaan glanced up at her. He felt surprised to see this look on her face, even though it only appeared very briefly. Rui was always cold and unreactive, just what could cause her to feel so shocked…?
The conversation went on after she quickly recovered.
“But why did you leave the Heavenly Path Sect? Was it because of the beast tide that you mentioned, the one that killed almost everyone? Or because your dantian was crippled and you were worried that your status as a fiend would be unveiled?”
Yaan’s expression didn’t change as he spoke. He continued to walk as he faced ahead.
“After seeing everyone he cared for being slaughtered so viciously, teacher’s dao heart went into turmoil. I don’t know what you did, but you made him jump from a cliff and kill himself. I had to leave because I no longer had teacher’s camouflage, and your power was drained too severely. Even now, years later, the ring has no reaction.”
“I killed your teacher?” Rui looked down at him and stared. Yaan didn’t look at her, but just lightly nodded.
“Do you hate me? Or do you only hate the ‘real’ version of me?” She asked, perhaps out of sheer curiosity.
“Hate?” Yaan smiled lightly and shook his head. “No, I don’t hate you. Despite everything, I don’t think that I will ever ‘hate’ you, no matter how you wrong me. Feeling hate towards someone so cold and indifferent…it just feels meaningless.”
Rui looked away from him and became silent for a long time.